Haha, crash just completely disappeared from the ratings. Please guys show your support and help CRASH rise up the ratings. Please! Please! I know it's annoying to be constantly be asking this of you but please guys, I know we can make CRASH reach the top. 

"What she really wanted to say was

please stay,

please hold me,

please don't let go

but it all got lost in translation"

C H A P T E R N I N E

ADHIRA WANTED HIM to go away. It was hurting so badly. Her heart, her chest- as though the entire weight of the universe had manifested inside her chest and was expanding uncontrollably. The stars, the dazzling lights, the galaxies- though, she was earth bound. The sun was brightly shining through the window, the wind was gently blowing in from the slightly parted window. It was a bright after storm sunny morning. The birds were chirping loudly outside. She didn't feel earth bound. She felt as though she was floating in space, isolated.

She had been with this man for six years now yet it was the first time, she was feeling this way. The feeling of heartbreak. The very first time he had made her feel this way.

Adhira was terrified of him, terrified of getting more hurt. Wisps of her identity were already slipping away. It was the worst part of heartbreak- losing oneself.

He was reaching for- tips of his fingers were about to touch her. She lost it. Completely.

His brown eyes stared at her, shocked-he looked completely haggard, torn, and defeated. There were many battles he had faced but this was his hardest battle.

"Adhira?" He stumbled backwards, nearly tripping on the chair.

She was breathing heavily. She wanted to get away from him. He was sucking the air from the room- like he had sucked every ounce of kindness in her body, like he had stolen the lights of her world, leaving her in darkness.

She screamed- on top of her lungs, she didn't want to see his face or voice. "LEAVE ME ALONE. FOR GOD'S SAKE, LEAVE ME ALONE."

Rudra had never seen Adhira react this way. She was as calm as an early spring breeze, fluttering between the branches and picking off the petals. She was never a raging storm, Adhira didn't know storms. Hell, storms weren't named after girls like Adhira.

"But why?"

She sat up in bed- with laborious effort. Rudra couldn't see her struggle- he rushed to help, without thinking, without realizing that he was the pain, the only reason for all her struggles.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Adhira wheezed, her cheeks her flushed, her eyes were beginning to resemble a flute filled with red wine. "DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!"

"Why are you reacting this way?" Rudra held onto her shoulders, his fingers digging into her bones. She pushed away him, the gauze was coming undone- her burns were beginning to bleed again. Blood like rain, slowly trickled down her arms, staining the floors, the bedsheet, his scrubs and skin.

Both had lost sense- every ounce of it.

Adhira and Rudra had a rational love, a sweet love.

It was taking a wild turn. Breaking all bounds, chains. It was driving them to the brink of insanity.

Their rational love that they had carefully shielded from the world was going wild.

Untamed.

Blame the crash.

Blame the passion they had kept in for so long.

Blame the love.

Adhira's long strands of hair were coming out of the ponytail the nurse had tied, she knocked the medicine trays beside her bed. CRASH. The bottles shattered on floor, the pink liquids streaked the floors. The sharp shards of glass pierced Rudra's ankle- the only visible part of his skin. Blood dripped down but he didn't feel the pain.

"ADHIRA!" He screamed. "SNAP THE FUCK OUT OF IT."

She coughed violently, her chest falling rapidly beneath the robe. She punched his chest, repeatedly. Even in her weak state, she was packing quite the punch. But Rudra wasn't being hurt by the punches, he was being hurt by her broken eyes.

"WHERE WERE YOU?" She yelled- when the coughing ceased. Rudra watched in horror as blood dripped down in jaw. Deep maroon drops clung to her pale pink lips. This wasn't a good sign. He watched the monitors- her blood pressure was increasing at an abnormal rate. Hemoptysis, this was one of the side-effects of the blood thinners he had prescribed- the reason Dr. Kapoor was hesitant in administrating them.

But what were the odds of Adhira's body reacting this drug- Rudra quickly did the calculations in his mind, factoring in her age, her condition at the time of the accident-

The odds were so low.

Just as Rudra had originally suspected.

But then, why was her body reacting this way?

His stormy dark eyes widened. The pieces were fitting in, it didn't seem like a likely answer at first. He found himself attuned to Adhira's screams suddenly.

"WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I NEEDED YOU? WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WAS WALKING AWAY CRYING? WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WAS STRAVED FOR YOU? WHERE WERE WHEN I SCREAMED IN THE FLAMES?"

"I'm so sorry."

Rudra knew sorry didn't cut it- his mind was running in too many different directions at once. There was an injury the doctors had missed. The quick scans they had performed were not sufficient to catch this injury. Somewhere, in her chest- the crash had damages a vital portion of her lungs.

Adhira wheezed, her lips were beginning to take a blue color. "You destroyed me, Rudra."

A junior nurse walked in, followed by Dr. Kapoor- they were horrified by the spectacle created by the two lovers.

"I know." A tear slipped from Rudra's eyes.

Adhira cheeks were flushed. She wasn't used to him expressing his emotions so freely. "PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE. PLEASE." She placed her hands over her ears. She had enough- the gauzes were completely undone, her gown was slipping off her shoulder, the IV lines were tangled completely.

She didn't want to be here. Adhira felt the lights of the Garba night coming back- the memory was painful, she remembered seeing him dance along with Sasha- the way they blazed through floors and their engagement. She felt her lungs constrict.

Her eyes lingered to his hands- they were still bare and were griping her arms, her cold, shaky- burned arms. They were scarred, just like her.

No-one was going to love her now.

"GO AWAY!" She shouted. "PLEASE"

Dr. Kapoor took quick steps towards Rudra and took him by the arm. Rudra's hands lost her- as Dr. Kapoor dragged him away. "Come on, you're clearly distressing her."

"NO!" Rudra pulled himself from Kapoor's tight grip. Though he was shorter than Kapoor, he seemed alarmingly foreboding. There was a deadly air around him. Destructive. "I'm not leaving her."

"Rudra, she's not in the state to listen..."

Dr. Kapoor held his ground, the pristine doctoral coat gave him an air of confidence. He was probably the only man in the hospital capable of controlling Rudra. The staff had never seen Rudra lose his cool- he was one of the most nonchalant doctors in the entire staff. When Raj Kapoor had taken Rudra under his wing, he had instantly sensed a strange animosity form between them. This animosity had happened since Rudra was one of the most brilliant men he had seen in the field. Dr. Kapoor wasn't threatened by him. No, he intimidated by him. And Rudra had always sensed this. He always tried to impose his decisions on Kapoor. Kapoor played it safe, Rudra took the extra risk to save a life.

Their egos clashed ruthlessly, more than often than Kapoor liked it.

As he watched Rudra lose his cool, instead of feeling satisfied- Dr. Kapoor was feeling tensed. He wasn't sure if he could control him and the consequences that would follow this event.

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. SHE NEEDS ME!" Rudra literally fumed over Kapoor. He backed away- the tone of his voice was octaves higher than normal. Dr. Kapoor knew that the pent-up anger was about to erupt- he wasn't in the right state.

Rudra lowered his tone- after seeing his disapproving reaction. "Kapoor, there's injury we missed. She's hurting."

"She'll be hurting more if you stay here."

"I'm not leaving." Rudra spoke through gritted teeth.

Kapoor grabbed his collar, his toned arms flexing beneath the scrubs. "This dedicated boyfriend act would have been nicer when you ignored her and chose your family. Right now, she is not your girlfriend but my patient. I will not let you mess with her life."

Rudra's clenched fist collided with Kapoor's flawless face, leaving a red mark behind.

"YOU!" Kapoor instantly jumped into action. The hot Punjabi blood was soaring through his veins. Dr. Kapoor was a tiger you didn't mess with especially like this. He dragged Rudra by the neck and pushed him against the wall. "YOU WILL NOT MESS WITH HER!"

Rudra was about to hit back when the nurse's scream pierced their fight. "DOCTERS!"

Adhira was sunk back -panting heavily. The junior nurse tried to hold Adhira upright but it was useless. Blood dripping down her jaw, she collapsed on bed. Strands of black carelessly strewn around her face, white streams of gauze untangled around her body and the monitors monotonous beeping.

It was a mess.

The room was a chaotic mess- bloody footprints from Rudra's shoes, liquid medicines pouring onto floors, glasses broken, trays tossed carelessly- the two doctors were aghast with their own behavior.

The young nurse fearfully watched the two men. One look at the other and they knew that they had to stabilize Adhira's condition immediately.

"Shift her to the operating room." Dr. Kapoor was already moving towards the exit, with Rudra following meekly behind. "We operate immediately."

Staring dead into his eyes, Dr. Kapoor spoke. "You better be right about that injury, Dr. Shah."

"I could bet on my life." He held his gaze, fiercely.

Kapoor smiled, bitterly. "You already are."

When the meaning of his words settled in, Rudra had never felt so helpless.

Because Adhira was his life.