iMessage

9:00 PM

Conrad 🙄

Me:
Hey.

Conrad:
Yes?

Me:
Wow. Mabilis pa magreply kaysa sa jowang nanlalamig

Conrad:
Huh?

Conrad:
You have a jowa? And he's nanlalamig?

Me:
OA!

Me:
Eme-eme lang. Pero wala akong jowa 'no! At hinding-hindi ako magjojowa.

Conrad:
Well, that's very evident on you. You don't seem like the type to be in a relationship.

Me:
Judger.

Me:
Pero true naman.

Me:
Pero gano'n ba talaga? Mukha ba 'kong hindi jowable?

Conrad:
Hindi naman.

Me:
E ano pala?

Conrad:
You just appear to be that type of a girl who doesn't do boyfriends.

Me:
Because I party a lot?

Conrad:
I guess.

Me:
Judgmental ampotek.

Conrad:
Hey, you asked.

Me:
Fair point.

Me:
But you know, just because a girl is partying a lot doesn't mean that she can't fit into the "girlfriend" category.

Me:
Seriously, you men have to stop limiting women based on their lifestyle or their Instagram feed.

Me:
When a woman shows too much cleavage, ya'll men be like "pretty enough to fuck but not pretty enough to love."

Me:
Gusto niyo ng jowang demure pero panay suso naman nila-like niyo.

Me:
Like, how was your brain wired? I'm honestly curious. I wish they would discuss that in AbPsych

Conrad:
Hahaha

Me:
What's funny? I'm spitting facts!

Conrad:
I know.

Me:
So... you're agreeing?

Me:
You're not going to speak on behalf of the despicable men community?

Me:
You're not going to throw men's gasgas line like, 
"Kasalanan niyo kung bakit kayo nababastos."

Conrad:
God, no. Those men are the worst.

Conrad:
The one who controls their girlfriends, not allowing them to wear bikinis but then you'll see their names under every half naked photos of women.

Conrad:
Especially men who blames women for being harassed.

Me:
Wow.

Me:
Who are you? And where is my bestfriend's menopausal brother?

Conrad:
Hahaha

Me:
Pero 'di ba ayaw mo sa mga nag pa-party na babae? Or liberated women in general?

Conrad:
Well, that's just my preference. I prefer women who spends their free time in libraries. Soft women. But that doesn't make me "hate" women who party... they're just not my type.

Conrad:
Gets?

Me:
Gets, gets.

Conrad:
And liberated is good. I like women who bravely fight for their rights and women who aren't afraid to speak up for other women.

Conrad:
You see, Frankie... I'm not the one who's judgmental here... you are.

Conrad:
Panis.

Me:
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH OH MY GOD

Me:
😭😭😭😭😭

Me:
Where did you learn that?!! HAHAHAH

Conrad:
From my assistant.

Me:
Ewan ko sa'yo.

Me:
Now I completely forgot the reason why I texted you.

Conrad:
Well, try to remember it and text me again.

Conrad:
I'll just finish some work.

Conrad:
Have a great night, Frankie.