Arthit Rojanapat had always been fascinated by muggle things.

It wasn’t a casual interest, or the mild curiosity most witches and wizards developed when they encountered something unfamiliar. Arthit approached the muggle world the way he approached everything else in life—with full attention, open delight, and an alarming willingness to get involved.

As an Auror, his days were rarely his own. They were spent chasing dark wizards through narrow alleys, Apparating across the country at a moment’s notice, and filing reports that he absolutely did not enjoy writing. The work was demanding, unpredictable, and often exhausting.
Which was precisely why, on his rare days off, he disappeared.

Not into quiet.

But into London.

Muggle London.

He would dress down—plain clothes, no robes, no insignia—and walk for hours without a destination. He liked the noise, the movement, the lack of magic humming beneath everything. It made the world feel different. Simpler, somehow, even when it wasn’t.

He liked their inventions most.
Battery-operated devices that worked without spells. Screens that lit up entire rooms. Trains that ran with mechanical precision instead of enchanted tracks. It felt like magic that had been rebuilt from scratch, without wands.

It fascinated him.

And then there was their cinema.
Arthit loved cinema.

The idea that people could sit in a dark room and watch a story unfold—huge, vivid, emotional—without a single charm involved felt almost absurd. And yet it worked. More than that, it moved people. Entire rooms would laugh, cry, sit in silence together.

It felt… intentional.
Like choosing to feel something, instead of having it happen to you.
He liked that.

A lot.

Which was how he found Valentine’s Day.
At first, it had seemed like a joke.
An entire day dedicated to couples being openly, unapologetically affectionate? Flowers, chocolates, handwritten notes, long walks, ridiculous expectations—
It sounded excessive.

And then—
it sounded perfect.
Arthit didn’t do things halfway.
Once the idea settled, it took exactly one evening for it to become a plan.

And exactly one person for it to matter.
He found Kongpob three days later in the Ministry cafeteria.

Of course he did.

Kongpob always sat in the same place, at the same time, with the same quiet precision that made it feel less like a habit and more like a system.

Arthit dropped into the seat across from him without warning.

“We should celebrate Valentine’s Day,” he announced, sliding into the seat across from him.

" Why? "

“It’s a couple’s festival. Muggles invented it and it’s brilliant. I want to do the whole thing — dinner, flowers, the works.”

Kongpob set his fork down with precise care. His mind immediately ran the numbers.

“Valentine’s Day is a commercially engineered event,” he said, voice flat and clinical.

Arthit’s grin widened.
“Here we go.”

Retail sectors report a one hundred eighty-seven percent increase in chocolate and floral sales during this period,” Kongpob continued, voice even. “Post-event analysis indicates a fourteen percent increase in relationship dissolution within the following week, primarily due to unmet expectations.”

Arthit rested his chin on his hand, watching him with open amusement.

“It introduces unnecessary stress,” Kongpob concluded, “with no measurable long-term relational benefit.”

Arthit leaned forward, undeterred. “I know all of that. But I still want to celebrate it. With you. I’ll arrange everything. You don’t even have to get me a gift.  Let me do the romantic stuff.  Just… be there. Okay ?  ”

Kongpob studied him for three full seconds.

Arthit’s grin was already forming, the one that turned his eyes into crescents and made something in Kongpob’s chest recalibrate without permission.

Arthit’s expression was open in a way it always was when he wanted something—not guarded, not calculated, just… there. Bright and uncomplicated and, for reasons Kongpob had never fully reduced to data, difficult to refuse.

Variables adjusted.

Risk remained.

But so did—
return.

Arthit’s smile, when he got his way, was statistically significant in its effects. Increased energy levels. Reduced cognitive fatigue. Noticeable improvement in task efficiency over a sustained period.

That was measurable.

The rest—
was not.

Which made it harder to dismiss.

Kongpob let the silence extend just long enough to complete the calculation.
Then—
“Agreed.”

Arthit’s face lit up instantly.

Kongpob raised a hand slightly.

“On one condition.”

Arthit groaned.
“Of course there’s a condition.”

“You will sign a binding agreement,” Kongpob said, unbothered, “that no dissatisfaction arising from Valentine’s execution—whether due to unmet expectations, perceived lack of romance, or comparative evaluation against external standards—will result in relational termination.”

Arthit blinked.

Then he laughed — loud, warm, delighted.

Full, warm, delighted laughter that turned heads from nearby tables and made Kongpob’s internal calibration shift by a margin he chose not to quantify.

“You’re serious,” Arthit said, still laughing.

“Yes.”

“You want me to sign a contract,” Arthit repeated, “so I don’t break up with you over Valentine’s Day.”

“That is an accurate summary.”

Arthit shook his head, still smiling.
“You’re unbelievable.”

“That has been stated before.”

Arthit leaned forward, reaching across the table to lace their fingers together without hesitation.

“Fine,” he said. “I’ll sign whatever contract you want.”

Kongpob did not pull his hand away.

“I just want one day,” Arthit added, quieter now, “where we act like the rest of the world doesn’t exist.”

That—
was not measurable.

Kongpob noted it anyway.

Then inclined his head slightly.
“Acceptable.”

And if his grip tightened, just briefly, around Arthit’s fingers—
it was not acknowledged.

Not verbally.

.........

After Arthit returned to his desk, Kongpob took a deep breath, letting his mind run miles a minute.

Now, that there was no risk of Arthit breaking up with him over any valentine related fiasco; he can peacefully find a way to optimize their Valentine date.

Iterneries, to his present knowledge,  included
1. Roses
2. Chocolates
3. Presents
4. Spending whole day with lover

And

5. Romance — although, it was subjective and unquantifiable. 

Taking half a day leave, Kongpob went on his mission of collecting data for perfect valentine celebration. 

.............

Kongpob apparated just outside central London and adjusted his attire with a precise flick of his wand.

The transformation held.

Dark charcoal three-piece suit. Tailored. Structured. Minimal deviation from the version he had observed in the muggle film Arthit had insisted they watch.

It had been inefficient.

Two hours of non-interactive storytelling.

However—

Arthit had leaned against him halfway through, laughing at something unstructured and unnecessary.
Kongpob had logged that as: positive environmental association.

The suit remained.

He entered the city.

The first observation was immediate:

Noise levels: excessive
Movement patterns: chaotic
Human clustering: inefficient

He began data collection.

“Excuse me,” he said to the first subject—a woman holding three shopping bags and moving at unnecessary speed.

She stopped.

Looked at him.

Paused.

“…yes?”

“What are your expectations for Valentine’s Day from a romantic partner?”

A long silence.

Then—

“…wow.”

She smiled.

Brightly.

Too brightly.

“Flowers,” she said. “Definitely flowers. And not cheap ones. Something thoughtful. And dinner—like a proper one, not just takeaway.”

“Define ‘thoughtful.’”

“Something that shows he knows me.”

“Quantify.”

“…what?”

She laughed and left saying " I am in a hurry "

Data recorded:
• flowers required
• cost correlates with perceived effort
• personalization mandatory

Second subject.

“No gifts,” the woman said firmly. “Gifts are performative. I want time. Actual time. Presence.”

“Define duration.”

“Not timed.”

Kongpob frowned “That lacks measurable boundaries.”

“That’s the point.”

Data conflict identified.

Third subject:

“If he doesn’t plan something big, I’m leaving him.”

Fourth:

“If he plans something big, I’m leaving him.”

Kongpob paused.

Contradiction ratio: unacceptable.

Fifth subject attempted to give him her phone number.

He declined.

Sixth subject assumed he was flirting.

He clarified he was not.

She seemed disappointed.

By the ninth interaction, the dataset had collapsed entirely.

Kongpob relocated.

The park was quieter.

Less variable interference.

He sat on a bench.

Aligned posture.

Hands folded.

Reassessment initiated. With such contradictory data set arriving at a useful conclusion was impossible.

He was still analyzing his collected data when a sob reached his ears. Kongpob moved towards source of sound.

A girl sat two feet away.

Not part of his dataset.

Not engaged.

She was crying.

Silently.

Kongpob observed for three seconds.

Then reached into his pocket.

He held out a handkerchief.

She blinked.

Looked at it.

Then at him.

“…thank you,” she said, taking it.

She wiped her face.

Exhaled slowly.

“You are experiencing emotional distress,” Kongpob said.

She laughed.

A small, broken sound.

“Yeah,” she said. “That’s one way to put it.”

“Is the cause identifiable?”

“…my boyfriend.”

Kongpob nodded.

“Clarify failure point.”

That made her laugh again.

Properly this time.

“Oh my god,” she said. “You talk like a robot.”

“That is inaccurate.” Kongpob said .

“Is it?”

“Yes.” Kongpob said " I talk precise. "

A pause. " You were about to discuss fail point. " Kongpob probed.

" Thank you for the kindness. I do not want to burden you with my sob story. "

" It is not a burden. It is useful data that will help me avoid being a failure point for my boyfriend . "

" Did you guys have a fight ? Is he angry with you ? "

" No. He is at optimum state of happiness since I agreed to celebrate valentine's day together with him. "

" That's cute...." Then here brain processed the sentence " Wait a minute .... you agreed ? He had to convince you to celebrate valentine ? "

" Yes " Kongpob replied " I agreed after he signed the contract "

" For what ? Are you dating your client ? "

"No..." Kongpob smiled , proud " I am dating my school friend and colleague . "

" You know him since school, still you made him sign a contract ? "

" Yes. I can not take risk of our relationship of three years,  terminating over this commercial human made festival. " Kongpob gladly provided the data to keep the exchange balanced.

" I have so many questions...but relationship of three years " The girl almost shouted at him " and still he had to convince you to celebrate valentines ? You are lucky he didn't dump you . "

" I didn't know he wanted to celebrate valentine. "

" From which planet are you ? Everyone wants to celebrate valemtines..."

" I'm from earth..and I do not want to celebrate valentine because statistically — "

" Stop reading reports to me " She glared.

Kongpob shut up.

" My boyfriend was a similar jerk. Although , i cannot put you at his level because you are atleast trying ..."

" Your boyfriend did not match your level of efforts — "

“For first six months he did, then he Stopped,” she continued, “planning anything. Remembering things. Caring about things that matter to me.”

A pause.

“And I continued giving excuse to myself. But when i had an accident last month and he did not show up for a single day of my one month hospital stay.  I  realized… I deserve better.”

" You did" Kongpob frowned.

Slightly.

“Decision made prior to emotional resolution,” he said.

“…what?”

“You have not fully disengaged emotionally, yet behavioral termination has occurred.”

She stared at him.

Then—

laughed.

“Yeah,” she said. “That’s exactly it.”

A pause.

Then she looked at him more carefully.

" Do you fear of it happening in your relationship"

" At the moment the probability is low but I my not have taken all the variable in to accounts — "

" I'm all for accepting people as they are " She stared at kongpob " But, can you talk normally. "

" This is how I normally talk " Kongpob replied, confused.

She sighed..

“…okay,” she said slowly. “ What do you want to infer from your data collection."

" What constitutes a perfect valentine celebration? "

" It differs from person to person. " She replied. " What I may find delighting can distaste other person."

" Logical. " Kongpob replied " But not helpful. Valentine celebration is in two days, I do not have enough time to account for all the variables your statement imply.  "

The girl laughed " Good. Tell me about your boyfriend. What is he like —what do you like about him?”

Kongpob answered immediately.

“He is inefficient.”

“…that’s not a compliment.”

“It is accurate.”

“…try again.”

Kongpob adjusted.

“He introduces variability that improves overall system function.”

She blinked.

“…I have no idea what that means.”

“He makes things better,” Kongpob said, after a pause.

That—

she understood.

“…okay,” she said, softer now. “That’s… actually kind of nice.”

“He also interrupts unnecessarily. Displays poor impulse control. Frequently disregards optimal solutions. He makes each day unpredictable yet memorable. ”

“…wow.....Do you compliment him the same way ? "

“Yes.”

No hesitation.

That—

made her go quiet.

" How does he compliment you ?  Tell me his exact words. "

Kongpob considers briefly.
“He said, ‘Honestly, I’m lucky you fell in love with me first.’”
A pause.
“‘If you hadn’t, I’d have to compete with everyone else—and I don’t share well ’”
Another pause.
“‘You make me feel like the whole world revolves around me."

" He exaggerates" Kongpob added.

The girl fell deep in thought. " Hmm... he doesnt sound emotionally constipated. . Last personal question. Tell me highest compliment you have given to him  or want to give him? "

Kongpob considers the question longer this time.
Long enough that it’s noticeable.
Then—
“The highest compliment,” he said slowly, “would be…”
A brief pause.
“…that I have structured my long-term decisions around his continued presence.”

" Wow... did you tell him how much you love him ? "

" I have presented him with enough data — "

" But, you haven't presented words to him, Khun kind stranger. Sometimes , a warm word and warm hug is as needed as your thoughtful actions. " She advised " You look very much in love and your boyfriend seem to be very understanding. I would go as far as calling hom a saint.

Kongpob paused. " I prefer him not to be a saint. Saints can't have romantic relationship "

She stared at him.

Then leaned back  " You do not want to entertain even a hypothetical situation that would distance him from you"

" Accurate " Kongpob nodded.

“If you want to keep him,” she said, smiling,  “you need to start saying what you feel in a way that he doesn't not have to translate. There may be days , he is emotionally exhausted enough to have no energy to translate your love language."

" Speaking imprecise language does not come easily to me.." Kongpob hung his head " valentines is in two days, I want to exceed his expectations. It is first thing he has asked of me."

The girl smiled " You do not have to speak different language, just speak with clear intentions like right now. And for valentine's ... you can write "

Kongpob tilted his head slightly.

“Write what?”

“A letter. Tell him how you feel.”

“That introduces recorded imprecision.”

“That introduces honesty.”

Silence.

Kongpob considered that.

“…acceptable variance,” he said finally.

She smiled.

“Good,” she said. “Because honestly? If he’s stayed this long—he’s not leaving you easily. You shpuld not give him a reason to .”

Kongpob did not find that reassuring.

He stood.

“Thank you for your input.”

She blinked.

“…that’s it?”

Kongpob reached into his pocket.

Produced a card.

“This provides access to a restaurant within a 500-meter radius,” he said. “High satisfaction ratings. You should not remain in distress during a festival period.”

She stared at it.

“…are you serious?”

“Yes. My boyfriend says good food is happiness. I trust his judgement .  ”

A pause.

Then—

she laughed.

“You’re weird,” she said.

“Accurate.”

She looked at the card again.

Then back at him.

“…your boyfriend’s lucky,” she said.

Kongpob considered that.

“…uncertain,” he replied.

" Good luck for your valentines. May it be happiest day of your life. "

" May you find a person who will match your level of efforts and celebrate many valentines with you. "

" you are improving . Keep talking like that only "

Kongpob nodded. Then he turned.

And left.

System update:

• current strategy insufficient
• emotional communication required
• implementation pending

For the first time—

Kongpob did not attempt to optimize the outcome.

He decided—

to risk it.