My palms sweat with anticipation, today's the day it all goes down. There has been many moments in life where I've become insanely nervous, but none that I can recall like this. Perhaps there was this one time where I broke my mother's favourite porcelain doll and I didn't want to tell her because I knew she'd be mad. My moral conscience caught up to me though, something like what's happening now.

I wrap my arms around Blake's waist and rest my head on his warm solid chest. He instantly wraps his arms around mine and kisses the top of my head.

"How are you?" he asks.

If it isn't obvious enough, I'm freaking out. Despite the calm and well thought out words of wisdom Blake manages to sprout out, I don't think he couple possibly say anything to help me feel better. I feel sick to my stomach, and I don't think it'll pass until this is just a thing of the past.

I don't understand how people can look back at these moments and laugh. I certainly can't sense the humour in the situation. All I feel like is crap with a horrible sense of guilt in my stomach. I feel as if I should have already told my parents, but it's not like I could have done it earlier either.

My phone madly vibrates across the kitchen counter as my ringtone plays. I break away from our hug and step towards the bench to answer it. I press the deceive against my ear and hear the sound of my mother's voice.

It takes me a moment for my brain to catch up with the conversation. It's only when her mumbled words make sense, my head skips a beat inside my ribcage. I have to cough to stop myself from choking.

"Hun, I asked if we could do dinner at our house," she says.

My mother's voice rings inside my head like when you yell into a cave and it echoes. My sight goes blurry and I temporarily feel numb to the world. I'm not prepared for this, I can't do it.

Having dinner here meant I'm in my safe zone, but stepping into my parents' house makes things different. The dynamics of the situation have been shuffled around now and I can't grip with it.

"Um, how come we can't have dinner here?" I ask. "I've shopped for all the food." I try to place forth a convincing argument so that she caves and goes back to the original plan. I don't want to be suspicious and questionable if I say no to going to their house for dinner.

"Your father is working late again, so I thought it would be easier. We could always rearrange for tomorrow?"

I don't know if I could wait until tomorrow or even another night. I've already spend enough time stressing over this, so I might as well get it over and done with.

"Sure, your house sounds great," I reply.

"Great, I'll see you soon then." We part ways and hang up. I place the phone on the table and dive into Blake's arms once more. This is my portable safe zone, I'd be okay if Blake is by my side, and he will be.

I'll go to dinner, I'll smile, and I'll be alright.

"What's up, Ava?" he questions.

"Change of plans." I huff. "Dad's working late so we're going to their house for dinner," I explain.

"Okay." He shrugs his shoulders, a slight grin on his lips. I wish I could be that carefree, like small changes didn't matter. I needed time to process and adjust to the smallest of changes.

"I need to get London ready." I go to walk off, but Blake stops me.

"I'll take care of London, you get ready." Blake kisses the top of my head before he marches up the stairs to pack her bag. I wander over to the couch and grab London from her new playpen. Since she's become a little too wanderoos, we've decided to box her in a little.

I sit back and hold her in my lap.

"You're just like your father, you know that?" I say.

London smiles up at me and holds her foot. It's hard to imagine what she's thinking right now, and I guess that kind of makes me curious. I'm envious of her life right now. She's got nothing to worry about because at that age, you don't understand the expectations of life . . . all that is expected from you is to grow up and be happy.

She giggles, her eyes close, and then she smiles. I hear the sound of a small popping noise before it hits me.

"Oh, you're definitely like your father." I shake my head and wrinkle my nose. "That's gross." I place London back in her playpen and walk away. The smell of her fart follows me, so I stand over by the kitchen to escape it.

"What's did my daughter do now?" Laughs Blake as he walks down the steps.

"Your daughter farted and it was bad."

Blake's nose wrinkles as he walks near London's play area.

"That's a ripper," he agrees.

He grabs London and checks her nappy. As Blake pulls the nappy back to check inside, gags at the smell.

"Oh, that sucks." I giggle.

"Ava, I love you." Blake gives me his best pleading eyes, but nothing he says is going to get me to change that nappy! He smelt it, he's changing it.

"Have fun changing your daughter's nappy," I tease.

"She's our daughter," says Blake.

I see the regret floating in his eyes. For once, I get the joke and the humour in it. For once, I'm not worried about London or anything to do with her, I'm worried about my parents.

"Right now, she's your daughter." I laugh.

"Don't worry, Miss Ava Greyson, I will get you back for this." Blake holds London a distance from his body as he walks up the stairs. While he changes her nappy, I work on cleaning up the kitchen.

Mum called at a good time, I hadn't started preparing dinner. However, I'd taken out plates and food to start cooking.

As I put the plates away, I hear the faint sound of Blake's voice. I be he's complaining about the smell – honestly, I would too.

When Blake is finished, he returns from upstairs with a happy baby and her travel bag. I grab my coat and bag from the front door before we head off to the car. On the walk, I give Blake the keys and I take London from him. We get to the car and I strap her inside while he gets comfortable.

Because we only have one car, Blake and I have to manage whose driving and who's carpooling. Since I haven't needed go anywhere, it's easy enough for me to drive Blake around, or to just stay at home without the car. But when I get in the car, I touch all the buttons and move his seat around, so it takes time for him to adjust everything.

Once she's strapped in and amused by a toy, I close the door and walk around to the other side of the car. I get into the car and look at Blake worriedly. Blake half-smiles as he grabs my hand and brings it to his face. He kisses the back of my hand, then squeezes it tightly.

"Are you okay?"

"Am I ever okay?" I nervously ask.

"You know what I mean." Blake half-grins.

"I'm alright for now. When we get to my parents' house, though, that's another story."

"Everything will be okay." He smiles.

"If you says so."

Blake reverses the car out of the driveway and heads off. I rest my head against the window and look at the changing scenery. I take a calming breath and try to avoid playing out all the horrible ways tonight can go.

I think the hardest part is that I don't know what to expect. I used to have a good grip on what to expect. Logan was always pushing on boundaries and finding new consequences. But after Logan passed away, they lost their predictability. It felt like we were all strangers walking in the dark, unknowing of what's ahead or how to proceed.

They buckled down on me, that wasn't surprising. I didn't mind it . . . I wasn't planning on escaping to a party to get drunk and forget about the world. I wanted to feel the pain of the world, it was the only thing that showed me it was real, that I wasn't dreaming or making this stuff up.

My parents weren't impressed that I was flunking my classes. They were so disappointed when they would receive calls from my all of my teachers. Another missed assignment . . . another failed test about something irrelevant. I didn't care about what they were teaching me. None of this was worth knowing because none of it was going to bring me or him back.

The day Logan died was the day we all died too.

I just thought that if I kept doing stupid shit, that maybe they'd notice me for a second. That when they looked at me, it wasn't straight through me, but rather at me. I didn't care if it was with disappointment, I just wanted them to see me, Ava Greyson.

My parents saw me, but not in the way I wanted to be seen. I'm afraid that's how tonight will pan out. I'm afraid they'll see a girl who is fragile and scared, a small girl who has ruined her life by falling pregnant with a baby, and to a boy who already has a child himself.

I don't want to be seen like that because it isn't the truth or even remotely close to how I view myself. I finally understood Blake on that level. I want them to see me as this young woman who's grown up. The same young woman who is going to be an amazing mother, and an extraordinary role model for two wonderful young children in her care.

There's nothing I can do to change how people see me, just to try and open their eyes to show them that their view isn't always the average sight, but rather just one side to see things.

My parents are unpredictable, just like life. I have to face them both the same . . . head on and with determination. Just because they see me as one person, it doesn't mean I am that person.

Our car pulls into my parent's driveway. My heart begins to beat frantically with anticipation. Part of me wants to run inside the house and scream the news, while the other part of me is thinking it might be a nice jog back to our house.

I'm not into sport, but jogging sounds great.

Before I have the chance to run off, Blake grabs my hand and grounds me to the car. He leans over the consul to press his forehead against mine. I look into his green eyes and see the swirl of determination and excitement there.

Just from his excitement and determination, it influences me to adapt the same vibe as well. I want this to be a great moment with my family. I want to put that tragic past behind us and to move forwards. This baby isn't going to make us forget about Logan, but rather bring new life to our family. Logan is going to be watching over the baby and I, which is comforting.

"It's going to be okay, Ava," he says. "Just take a deep breath."

"It's going to be okay," I whisper back.

Blake presses his lips against mine and it seems to calm me down, oddly enough.

"At the end of the day, all we need is each other. I love you, Ava Greyson."

"We need oxygen too, and food, but I love you, Blake Rivers," I reply.

"Come on, let's do this." Blake abruptly leans back and gets out the car. Since London is on his side of the car, he opens the back door and unbuckles her. I grab her travel bag from the car and join Blake around the other side.

As we walk up to the front door, I take deep breathe and avoid looking behind me. I need to keep moving forwards and tackle this head first. I can't do that if I keep looking behind me.

I ring the doorbell and wait. There's some shuffling noises, then suddenly the door opens wide and I see someone standing before us. My heart leaps through my chest and splatters against the floor.

No, it can't be . . . not on the day we're announcing our baby. For once, I don't need him here, I just need Blake.

"Hi guys, come inside," says Kyle.

Blake is the first one to step inside and great Kyle with an awkward half hug. I follow in behind and hug Kyle as well. It's a brief hug that leaves me unsettled.

We walk towards the kitchen to find my parents, each step harder than the one before. I can't believe Kyle is here, especially when I told him this is the night we're telling my parents. For once, I don't need Kyle with me for this. I just need Blake because it's our announcement to share.

Now I don't know what to do. I'm afraid having Kyle here will either make things better or worse. I'm hoping for the first option because I want my parents to be excited for us. But with my luck, it's like a mixed lolly bag, you don't know what you'll get, but you hope for the best . . . I guess that's all I could do, hope for the best.

Thoughts on Kyle's appearance? Do you think it'll make this better or worse?