S A N S K A A R

I got into my room with my mind filled with thoughts of her. All I remember now was her those eyes which reflected hurt and mainly guilt. No!... This was not actually what I  wanted. I know she would feel bad for all those but still... I wish I would be beside her now and I know she would be totally devastated but still she didn't want me to see that side of her. Okay I completely understand that she needs her own time but I'm extremely worried. I have no idea in what condition she would be now.

The truth which came out today is too big to intake at the same time. Should I just check her up? Mm.. but how I can I go in just like that?! She do needs her own space but still....

I ran my hands into my hairs totally irritated with my thoughts. I have no idea what I should do right now. Maybe I should give her some time.

I sat down on the floor with my back leaning on the bed.

What an awful past I got?! It completely destroyed our entire life. This dark past has completely left deep scars on our hearts. Thinking about this my respect for my so called father has vanished. He doesn't deserve to have a family nor treated as human. My wrath for him only increased, I know thinking of all this couldn't change the past happenings yet I hope those scars start fading with the time goes by.

Suddenly I heard a glass breaking sound from the other room which is swara's. All of a sudden my heart thumped badly. I immediately rushed to her room and opened the door. My breath hitched seeing her like that.

She was badly shaking with tears streaming down and she was mummering something. I rushed to her and held her hand.

"No!... Don't do this... Nooo" she started shouting shaking more badly.

"Swara... It's okay I.. I'm here." Hardly my words came out. I'm terrified seeing her in this condition.

I held her arms tightly and shook her a little while my eyes has turned glassy.

"Swara!" I voiced out more loud while she suddenly opened her eyes.

"Swara I...." She immediately pushed my hand off from her.

"Don't... Don't come." Her voice was cracky and she was moving behind totally scared.

I.. I don't know what was happening.

"Swara I'm here.." I tried to engulf in my hands yet she literally pushed me with all her might.

"You.. you will leave me go.." she yelled at me while my heart felt immense pain.

"I won't, promise." I slowly diverted her while she was still sobbing heavily.

I slowly held her but this time she didn't wiggle. I took her in my arms and she placed her head on my chest and holding my shirt tightly. I slowly caressed her hairs.

"You won't leave me na?" Swara looked at me with her eyes totally bloodshot and face totally pale and red. She looked too vulnerable.

"I will never." I kissed her forehead slightly while she gave a weak smile and soon passed out in my arms.

I quickly panicked seeing her suddenly fainted.

"hmm ... I will get up late tomorrow.... Don't wake me up.. whatever happens."

I remembered her words.

My heart felt so heavy and ached like hell seeing her like this. My eyes burned as hot tears scrolled down my cheeks. He held her tightly in my arms. I'm still afraid.... Afraid to loose her but she said me not to wake up and I don't want her too as well. She needs rest.

I slowly placed her properly on the bed and caressed her hairs.

I wish that I would take away all the pain she's going through.

Covering her with the sheets and wiping her tears I left the room taking a glance of her which broke my heart.

S W A R A

I opened my eyes slowly to see myself lying on the bed while a strong pain hit my head.

"Ahhhhh..." I struggled to sit while suddenly I felt him helping me.

I opened my eyes and I could feel my eyes totally swollen and my head was pounding so much in pain that I felt dizzy like anything.

"You okay?" I heard his worried voice.

I opened my eyes to see him sitting beside me. I just hummed as still I was not in a good position.

"What's the time?" I asked him with all my might. I don't know how much time I was unconscious.

"It's 2:00 in the afternoon." My eyes widened hearing that. I was unconscious for more than 12 hours? Gosh!......

I tried to get up but I was about to stumble yet he held me.

"Careful." He said while I gave a faint smile.

He helped me to walk till the washroom.

"I'm just here, freshup and I'll bring your lunch. If you need me just call me don't hesitate okay?" He asked and still could feel the care for me in him.

"Okay." I mumbled and went inside the washroom.

Brushing my teeth I directly went and switched on the shower letting the warm water flow down my body. I felt okay than before. That is when remembered something..... What did I exactly due yesterday night.

I tried to remember as much as I can and i got few flashes about me trying to get up but ultimately failed and the glass vase broke then I was on the night mare and sanskaar came and I pushed him ....

Wait wait.... I pushed him. Hell!

I immediately took a quick shower and came out to see sanskaar waiting for me with my lunch. I was hell tiered and hungry as well. I had to better eat my lunch quick and tablet.

I quickly started to have my lunch and took my tables and signed in relief. I sat down on the bed with him.

"Mm.. feeling better now?" He asked me.

While I would only hummed.

"Sorry." I whispered while my eyes were teary thinking about my act and my behavior.

"I.. should have let you speak with me.. whenever you wanted to... I.." I was hardly able to breathe.

"Hey that's...." I didn't let him speak this time. I know he would only try to change my topic which I don't want.

"I.. I pushed you last night.. I really didn't mean to.. I.." Before I would complain he took me in a tight hug.

"Stop feeling guilty, It's not your fault swara. I would have been the same if I was in your position." His words were calm which did soothe me but not fully.

He caressed my hairs lovingly and I was still in his embrace. I felt safe, warm and protective after so many years.

I felt the same.... The same when he used to hug me years.

"I felt home!"

____________________.

TO BE CONTINUED....

I've messed up everything here! This is not what I planned for. All of a sudden I had to visit the doctor and I arrived only at 10.00. This was not what I planned of I'm seriously very disappointed. Hope you all like the chapter do comment and hit the ⭐.

Love,
Diya ❤