As Cole laid himself down into his bed, snuggling into his pillows and blanket his mind was racing still.

He thought about the time after his mother had passed.

The time he was home alone most of the time, having to do all the chores, not caring about school grades or even his mere presence in school.

At one time he even faked his dad's signature on most letters and school tests.

But most if the time the school didn't care either.

They knew about his loss.

And still they didn't check up on him.

And Cole absolutely loved this fact.

So this is what you meant

So he spent these days alone.

when you said that you were spent?

Alone in his grief, knowing his father was out with his band all day.

All night.

Singing and dancing.

Until he wasn't.

Until he came home one day, late evening, probably drunk and told Cole he had signed him up for the Marty Oppenheimer School of Performing Arts.

And that changed pretty much everything but most importantly it changed their relationship.

Lou knew that Cole didn't function under pressure.

He could have delivered the goods, at least that's what he always told himself was the truth, but not in practicing for hours without a break and then getting called to bed without dinner after fucking the easiest dance steps up all the time.

And especially not when forced to go into a boarding school where the singing and dancing practice looked like THIS everday.

Still that's what Lou did.

And Cole still fought with the memories of this time, they were stilm haunting him.

But like Wu always said, everything that happened to us in the past, has a lecture somewhere in it.

And we gotta learn from those past lectures.

And like this, grow up to the person we wanna be.

And now it's time to build from the bottom of the pit
Right to the top, don't hold back

Well, pretty quote but totally useless.

Thinking back to the Oppenheimer never did Cole anything good, but right now he couldn't stop his thoughts from trailing off and showing him pictures and memories of strict, dress code suited guys who would totally not behave like they are dressed.

No suit, no good manner in front of the teacher could undo what the kids there really were.

Monsters.

Okay, that sounded brutal but that's the way Cole called them.

This school was no place for him, a "stupid bitch", as they called him.

Untalented brat.

Depressed Idiot.

"Emo".

All this teasing, for what?

Endless nights spent in this shared room with five other boys who would show him how much he didn't belong.

Cole sighed and got up again, restless.

Looked out his window, saw his friends train with dummies down in the court.

What he really was was a boy, merely a kid who had lost his mother and got sent away from his father because he didn't have the time to take care of a child.

The time, the patience, the love.

Lily never wanted to send her son into this boarding school dad always talked about.

And after yesterday Lou had proven for the second time that he wouldn't care for his wife's wishes.

Cole went back to bed again, curled himself up in his blanket and stared at the ceiling until his mind drifted off to the time after the Oppenheimer.

Even though he never thought this time would exist for him.

One night, the 5 had something planned for him.

And with "one night" he meant two weeks after this stupid school had started they already wanted to fully bully him out.

They planned on literally bathing him in used toilet water once he would open the door to their room.

He knows that, because he heard them planning it.

But too bad he had his own plans.

That night he never planned to enter this room again.

Packing my bags and giving the academy a rain-check

Two weeks in and Cole ran away.

Being a total disgrace for Lou.

I don't ever wanna let you down
I don't ever wanna leave this town

But, he never regreted it

'Cause after all
This city never sleeps at night

All this seemed so far away and still felt like yesterday.

Part of his past, his memory and part of himself.

A part he never regreted because of what Wu taught him.

No regrets.

So this is where you fell, and I am left to sell?

'Til now.

Gosh, how Cole wished he would have never entered or never left this school.

How much he wished he could've been this perfect son his dad always wanted.

The path to heaven runs through miles of clouded hell

Maybe then all of this stupid arguments they had then never happened.

But more important - the argument they have now.

How could he? Again letting Cole down, again chosing something else over him.

Someone.

Then it was his career.

Now it's...

She.

Stupid "Part of his past" Bullshit. Stupid "It makes you who you are" Bullshit.

Cole wished he could just bury his past, his future.

His presence.

Oh, if just the ground would open up and swallow him.

Being totally in his thoughts he hadn't noticed how he had gotten up again, walking up and down in his room.

"Cole?", he flinched as he heard his name out of the sudden.

It was Jay.

"Cole you were supposed to sleep a little bit"

"Can't", he just mumbled but as Jay took his hand and lead him to his bed he just fell on it with a grunt.

The blue ninja then carefully pushed him in the sheets again and wrapped the blanket around him like he would tug in a baby.

As Jay then even sat himself next to him and comb his hair with his fingers Cole sighed.

"Jay", he murmured, totally red faced and eyes rolling.

Jay blushed too.

"Sorry", he said. "I just thought it would calm you", he didn't stop the combing.

"You know, we are pretty worried about you. Your behaviour and mental state"

"Don't be", Cole whispered and couldn't help his eyes falling shut, couldn't hide the fact he was enjoying the comfort.

Something he had very little of in his past.

"It's nothing", he added as a drowsyness rushed over him.

It was warm under this blanket, Jay's steady movements on his head...

"This too shall pass, eh?", Jay asked.

Cole thought for a second.

Will it?

Probably not any time soon.

Will he get used to... this new... eh... thing that happened?

Probably not.

So he shook his head, fought back tears.

"Shhh, we are there for you, buddy. Always", Jay whispered.

And with that being promised Cole finally drifted off in a dreamless sleep.

This too shall pass and become a memory, a part of his past that'll help him growing into the person he wanted to be.

It just had to.

He only needed the courage to begin letting it pass.

It's time to begin, isn't it?
I get a little bit bigger, but then I'll admit
I'm just the same as I was
Now, don't you understand that I'm never changing who I am.