[Park Saeyi]

The more I try to hide my discomfort around the terrible direction my life has taken, the worse. While Sara, Byeonghee and Saehyeon have been sympathetic, the same can't be said about the rest of the student body, especially the ones I used to call "friends."

As a result, I'm alone, roaming through benches to spend the night as stationing by just one would get in my trouble with authorities. As much as I'd like to rent myself a goshiwon, I can't afford one yet. Therefore, I have to take odd jobs to save money.

One of them consists of literally cleaning dustbin on the streets. It's a stressful job and it pays very poorly. If I'm lucky, I get 4000 won a day and that's it. Of course, I have to do many jobs at a time to just try and make ends meet. While I've always respected workers of all kinds, I'm growing to hate that not all of them are rewarded as they deserve.

I've also taken babysitting, dogsitting and law mowing jobs out of desperation. None of the families I've worked for so far have treated me well at all. Some even refused to pay me, claiming I didn't do well. I don't have the strength to even argue over this, so I just give in and move to other tasks until I find a more stable form of employment.

***

Today, I decide to accept an offer as a cleaner for one day in exchange for a whopping million won, out of desperation and thinking it's just a joke. I mean, I don't mind the extra hustle. I just want to make sure it's true and not a scam.

To my shock, my taks consists of cleaning... X-FILE's dorms. They're a rising boy group and want to leave their mark in the K-Pop scene. Before the drama unfolded, I used to dream of meeting them and, why not, asking them to collaborate for social media contents.

Now, I get to clean their dorms. Okay, chances I meet them are very slim, but, hey, this is better than being treated by scum by the typical overworking, frustrated family who barely spend time with their kids and refuse to acknowledge even the smallest achievement.

The exact moment I'm supposed to meet my employer, I cross paths with Sara. She greets me and would like to catch up with me; however, I tell her, "Sorry, but I have to go. I'm supposed to start a new job for the day. Next time, okay?"

Sara gives me a puzzled look. "Look, I'm worried for you. You have missed two weeks of school, Saeyi. You can't keep hiding forever. You'll have to appear in front of the school committee."

I laugh bitterly. "Yeah, that. Why bother, though? They'll believe Lira instead of me. I'm fucking toast. Now, Sara, I really need to go. I can't be late for my new job." I leave a petrified Sara behind with regret, but also with the awareness that I'm closer to the point of no return. Either I regain what I lost, or I'll have to rebuild myself somewhere else.

***

The job offer was kind of disappointing. Not money wise—they gave me the allotted million won as promised. Not because I didn't cross paths with any X-FILE member. Well, that was actually a good thing. They would've distracted me and I would've gone full fangirl mode.

What let me down was that I constantly had the group's manager, Kim Taeshin, breathing down my neck and asking me inappropriate questions, even accusing me of potentially being a sasaeng. I held my thoughts because I need the money and didn't want to cause trouble.

When she doubled down on her allegations, however, I realized she wasn't a good person and she had ulterior motives. Aren't idol group managers supposed to coordinate the chores in dorms? Why the need for external aid?

Anyway, it's not like she or the company she works for couldn't afford to hire professionals for cleaning duties. It's sad they have to resort to constantly asking freelancers when they have the chance to. What matters is that I've completed my task and have now some more money in my pockets.

Still not enough to get myself a place where to stay for the night, but enough not to starve or have to beg for food. The biggest paradox is that, despite the hardships I face, I don't miss home, not even a little bit. I do worry for my younger sisters, though.

Speaking of them, I casually meet one of them, Saerim, as I'm far enough from the dorm. She herself is going through a bad moment, too. She wraps me in a hug when she bursts into tears. "Unnie, where have you been? Please come back!"

I should be the one wiping her tears; however, I end up crying too. "I'm sorry, I can't come back. At least, not yet. Can you promise you'll stay strong for me? Tell Saeeul, as well." I stop sobbing, and so does Saerim.

I ask her, "Why are you here? Mom and Dad will hunt for you if you're not back."

"I've had enough of there... Those two won't stop arguing! Saeeul and I tried to get them to make up, but it doesn't work." It's naïve at best of my parents to believe I was the problem. If anything, things have got worse since they kicked me out. If what Saerim tells me is 100% true, then they'll have a very long way to go to earn back my respect, let even forgiveness.

I still can't believe they threw me to the wolves over a false allegation. This way, they caused the entire family to drift apart even further. They haven't learnt from their past mistakes at all.

Anyway, the accusations are the most pressing matter I have to deal with and need my full attention. Having to deal with more family drama is the last thing I need now. Therefore, I tell Saerim, "For now, go back home. Don't tell anyone you've seen me."

She tries to protest. "But-"

"No buts. It's for your good. I can't put you in danger. If and when it's all sorted, we'll spend plenty of time together. We can also invite Saeeul. Now, do as I say and go home. End of question." I hate having to keep a cold, stern tone with my sister, but I can't expose her to the toxicity caused by those harmful rumors.

Reluctantly, Saerim says goodbye and runs away, crying once more. I feel terrible. How can I protect myself from the school committee when I can't even make sure my sisters are safe? I need help. A lot of help.

***

After a quite long period in hiding, I return to school, where name calling and sneaky provocations await me. As expected, everyone avoids me like the plague. Only Sara, Saehyeon and Byeonghee still interact regularly with me, at the expense of receiving insults or accusations of hanging out with a bully.

I've had enough of this bullshit. I take advantage of the general mess to single my friends out. We find a secluded empty room and lock ourselves inside. "They won't stop repeating Lira's nonsense! I swear, I want to smash their faces against the wall!" I exclaim.

Saehyeon, though jokingly, warns me. "Don't do that. They can seriously make you pass off as a bully just for thinking of it."

Sara intervenes, giving me a more serious piece of advice. "Saeyi, you have nothing to hide. Stop worrying. The committee must see through the lies, otherwise they'll earn a terrible reputation." I hope she's right. They're not a credible entity, they're a joke. I can't forget what they did to poor Yunhyeok with the complicity of Little Miss Justice.

Byeonghee's take, among all, is the most painful one. He can relate to me and the reason why stings. "I don't know if you'll believe me, but I've also gone through this."

"What do you mean?"

"I've had my fair share of haters, too," he explains. "Not in person, though. Mostly online. They'd mock me and say I look ridiculous. I've learnt not to give them any importance. Why should I suffer for someone unable to love themselves?"

Byeonghee has just made a solid point. I can't exclude Lira has such low self esteem that she sees bullies everywhere, people who'll tear her apart for anything. However, about what she claims she dug up on me... She didn't find it by chance. What are her real intentions? And, most importantly, who is her next target?