county fairs are a curious sort of thing

they're fun to go to

at least

she thought so

occasionally.

they were always prettiest at night though

when all the lights shine

into the night

and the Ferris wheel was her favorite part

to see the whole fair

from the perfect view.

on the other hand,

it was a money trap.

everything cost money

money

money

money

more

more

more

more

you have to keep playing

maybe you'll win something this time

just five more dollars...

oh you want to ride this ride?

just five tickets!

want tickets?

each ticket is a dollar...

but you can get twenty five tickets

for only twenty dollars!

want food?

it'll cost you a few dollars...

she didn't have enough money

to ride all the rides

to see all the shows

to win the games.

fairs weren't fair.

if only money weren't an issue

and she could spend money

as if it were nothing.

maybe then she could win that stuffed monkey

or ride that fun ride

or see that magic show.

she did get to see

the monster trucks

and some sort of western skit

and pigs and goats and ducks race

and pet animals

(it cost two dollars for food to feed the animals)

(she didn't buy food)

(the animals didn't come up to her)

her dinner was french fries

not that she was really hungry anyways.

she also had some funnel cake

but she couldn't finish it

and it made her feel sick after.

the worst part of it all

though

was that she wasn't really having fun.

she was there with her parents.

which basically meant she was alone.

all of her best friends

lived in other states

too busy with their lives

to remember plain old her.

when she told them she was going to the fair

they all said

how lucky she was

she didn't feel lucky.

she felt alone

and she had a headache

and the fair was fairly disappointing

and excessively expensive

and she honestly just wanted to cry

because it was the last Friday

before school would start

and she didn't want to go to school

because no one would be there for her

at least

no one that mattered

no one that she could really talk to

which sucked

a lot

and besides

she didn't have much to say anyways.

her answers were always the same...

what's up?

reading, watching tv, nothing...

what about you?

*insert long, extensive, interesting day here*

that sounds so cool!

then she wouldn't look at her phone for a while

because it depressed her

how her closest friends didn't seem to miss her

even though they said they did all the time.

she just wanted someone to be there for her

someone who could hold her

hug her

listen to her

even when she didn't have much to say

know when something was wrong

and just

be

there

so she wasn't so alone anymore....

there was a cute boy at the fair

and she kept looking at him

even though she knew she would never talk to him

and he would never talk to her.

she was almost positive that he never even glanced her way

even though she glanced his way

more times than necessary.

he was cute...

she imagined him coming up to her

saying hi

maybe even asking for her number.

it would never happen

but sometimes she couldn't help

but imagine implausible scenarios

where her life was actually interesting

where people actually liked her.

she was on the drop tower when she saw him,

and he was leaning against a railing.

she screamed on the way down

and when she finally got off the ride

the boy was gone

and she could feel the disappointment rising inside her.

she bit her lip.

she knew nothing would ever happen,

but she has a small hope

that maybe he would talk to her.

maybe she was crazy for thinking so,

but she just wanted a cute guy to actually like her

but that would never happen.

not to her..

she was just a plain jane

forgettable

a nobody...

after all,

if she wasn't,

would her best friends really forget about her?,