I saw Josh, he smiled up at me.

I could tell that it was faked and forced, he was in pain and probably hates me.

If that was true then why did his eyes hold so much kindness?

I sat down in my seat.

I hang out sometimes with this kid named Brendon.

He is friends with this kid named Ryan though and he never really pays much attention to me anymore.

I need to stop thinking like this, loads of people have it worse I shouldn't be acting like this.

It seems like I'm hated by so many people and all of my friends have other friends that they enjoy hanging out with more.

What's the point in even existing?

Josh would definitely be better off without me, hell, everyone would.

Maybe I'm just a big mistake.

I looked at my hand, cool started to fade to pink.

My knee had the same thing happening.

I only had three nice things in my skin, everything else was disgustingly true.

I don't deserve anything I have.

I should be dead, why am I still here?

The bell rang causing me to jump.

Has it really been that long?

I got up and headed to my last class.

I get to paint today.

~

I sat down and let my hands do all the work.

Once my hands stopped moving I got thrown back into reality.

I looked at the painting, it looked so dark.

You could actually see the pain in the painting.

Wow, I need help.