Author's Note: I don't really know what this is. Just some more sad OQ because I miss them 24/7 and I'm still in denial.

~

Regina had been silent since Robin had died. She refused to say anything and hardly even acknowledged anyone who tried to talk to her.

"Regina."

Regina looked up to see Snow and Charming standing next to her, hands entwined. The sight made her sick to her stomach, so she looked back down at the table.

"You don't have to go through this alone."

Yes, I do. I always have to go through everything alone because that's all I'll ever be; alone. But Regina bit her tongue and stayed silent instead of voicing her thoughts. No one cared anyways. Not anymore.

"We're here for you, Regina," Snow promised. "Whenever you're ready to talk, I'm here." Snow and David moved on from Regina's table when it was clear Regina didn't plan on responding.

A few minutes later, Emma entered the diner and walked straight for Regina. She sat down across from the former Evil Queen. "Hey, uh....Regina?"

Regina shot Emma a death flare before looking down at the table again.

"Look, I know this is sort of a delicate topic, but..." Emma sighed and began absentmindedly tapping her fingers on the table. "This is going to be kind of hard for you, I know..."

Regina looked up at Emma again and gave her a look that clearly said, 'Spit it out, Swan'.

"Hook's back," Emma blurted out. Her hands shot up to her mouth and her eyes widened in horror when she realized how insensitive she had been. Regina looked taken aback at first, but her face slowly hardened until anger covered up the grief and shock.

Emma hurriedly scooted out of the booth. "I'm sorry, Regina, I--"

The ground shook and Hook burst into the diner. "Swan! The clock tower..."

Regina narrowed her eyes at the pirate and Hook stumbled backwards. However, instead of lunging at him and ripping out his throat like Regina so desperately wanted to, she turned and vanished in a cloud of purple smoke.

"Killian!" Emma rushed over to her boyfriend to make sure he was okay.

"Regina!" Snow exclaimed, looking wildly around the diner for her friend. But Regina was long gone.

"What's this?" Zelena stood up, her daughter in her arms. "I thought we left him in the Underworld?"

"We don't have time for him," Snow waved her hand. "Where's Regina?"

Zelena placed an arm on Snow's shoulder. "I'll go find her. You talk to your daughter and the pirate."

"No." Snow looked into the witch's eyes, daring her to argue. "I was there when Regina lost Daniel, and I'm going to be there for her now. I was the only one who truly saw her before she was consumed by darkness, and I am not going to let her become the Evil Queen again. Because this time, she won't be after me." Snow glanced at her daughter and Hook, "she'll be after them."

Zelena seemed to wage an internal battle before she gave Snow a small nod. "Go find her. Check her house."

~

"It's not fair, Robin," Regina's voice cracked. She was staring out of the kitchen window, leaning over the counter. "I don't understand. You gave up everything so I could live and convince Zelena to defeat Hades. Hook didn't do anything. You deserve to come back, not him. I don't understand. You never did anything wrong. You never wanted to hurt anyone. You wouldn't even let me hurt that ladybug that got into the house. Why you? It should have been the pirate. It should have been me."

Regina knew that if Robin were there, he would have comforted her with words about how her past was exactly that; the past, and that he would do it all over again if it meant she would live. But he wasn't there and because of her, he never would be.

Regina quickly wiped her tears when she heard the door open.

"Regina?" Snow's voice called out. "Emma's sorry."

No she's not, Regina thought. She could care less about me now that she has that pirate back. Emma doesn't care about anyone's problems but her own. As long as her stupid pirate and Henry are okay, Emma won't shed a tear over anything.

Snow slowly approached Regina and stood next to her, looking out of the window as well. Regina's eyes were red and it was clear she had been crying very recently. Snow studied the view from Regina's window, trying to figure out what Regina was so intent on staring at. "Regina, what are you--?"

And then she saw them.

Robins.

"Oh."

Two robins with bright red chests fluttering around the yard, chasing after each other and hopping from branch to branch.

"They were his favorite," Regina whispered, almost inaudibly. It was the first time she had spoken where anyone could hear her since Robin had died. "He and I made a bird feeder for them so they would come back and he could watch them while I cooked. I would make joes about it and he would brush flour on my nose..." The ghost of a smile appeared on Regina's face as she thought back to the memories she and Robin had made.

But now they were only hers. No one else could carry them because no one else who existed could remember.

Snow placed a hand on Regina's arm. "It will get better."

"How can you be so sure? You only lost David for a minute or two. And even then, you could have reunited with him after death. I'm alone forever, Snow. My loneliness will last an eternity."

"You still have us. I meant what I said back at Granny's; we're here for you. I'm here whenever you need somebody. Even if it's four in the morning and you wake Neal up when you call me. And I know Zelena will be there for you too. And as much as you may hate her at the moment, Emma wants to be there for you as well, Regina."

"I never want to see her or her dirty pirate again," Regina muttered, the fire that was usually in her voice had deserted her. "I just want him back."

"I know you do. I know--"

"You don't know anything." Regina's voice was steely calm. "It took me over thirty years to open myself up to love again after my mother killed Daniel. And when I finally did..." Regina hung her head. "Anyone close to me just gets hurt. Maybe I'm better off alone."

"Don't say that."

"It's true!" Regina snapped. "If not for me, Roland would still have his father and the merry men would still have their leader. The only one hurt would be me and I'd much rather Robin be apart from me and alive than zapped out of existence forever!" Tears began spilling from Regina's eyes again and Snow didn't know what to say.

After a few moments of silence, Regina spoke again. "Did they send you because they were afraid of the Evil Queen?"

"No. Zelena was going to find you, but I forced her to let me talk to you instead. I know you, Regina. The real you. I know that a hero has always lived inside of you and I know that now that you've changed, you don't want to go back to the dark place you were in ever again."

"But I'm not a hero," Regina said hopelessly. "I'm just...stuck. Stuck halfway in between. Dark magic and an even darker past. Dark thoughts and the want for revenge. But I have people I care about and good intentions and I want to be good, I just hate it."

"You hate...good?" Snow asked, as if she couldn't wrap her mind around it.

"It's so much easier to be a villain," Regina admitted. "I don't need to care about who I hurt to get what I want. I don't need to care about what everyone will think of me if I do something terrible. I can give in to the dark desires and save the people I care about," Regina sighed. "But then the people I care about don't care about me. And I don't want to lose them. And I don't want to insult Robin's memory. So I'm trapped, alone, forever."

Snow's mouth opened a bit, but she didn't have a good response. Because everything Regina had said was true and arguing would be pointless. So Snow said the only thing she could think to say, "I believe in you, Regina."

Regina felt more tears spill from her eyes, but now, she was back to being silent. She looked back out of the window and watched as the robins bounced around on the ground that was still damp from the rain. Snow pressed her lips tightly together and studied the birds as well.

And for a moment, Regina could have fooled herself into thinking everything was perfect.