Mattie

I sat on the soft couch next to Emilio. He was being so patient, but I was so angry at myself, so disgusted that I couldn't even handle him touching me. I was a failure. I had tried to kill myself, so engulfed in my own grief about Violet and the guys that I didn't stop to think about the possibility that I was pregnant. I'd pushed the thought out of my head the night of the Gala. I was too possessed by my own demons, my own failure as a mother. How dare I bring a child into the world when I had abandoned my first one?

I looked up when I heard Tori's soft voice. She gave me a supportive smile, then left as she ushered in two men. I didn't even look at them, just lowered my eyes again, pulling at imaginary strings on my skirt.

"Mattie, love, this is Dr. Green and his husband, Owen. They're here to help," Emilio said softly. I had to be hallucinating. There's no way he said those names, no way.

I lifted my eyes to meet Sean's soft green ones. He looked concerned, and I was surprised to not see disgust. He looked at my bandages, "Hello, Mrs. Cardoza. I'm sorry to meet you under these circumstances. I'm Dr. Sean Green and this is my husband, Owen."

I didn't answer. I just stared at him in disbelief, then my gaze shifted to Owen. He looked heartbroken. "Hello, Mrs. Cardoza. If you prefer, I can leave for this discussion."

I shook my head, "N...no, you can stay."

"Mrs. Cardoza," Sean started.

"Mattie. Please just call me Mattie," I corrected him. Hearing my married name on their lips made me want to vomit. I cared for Emilio, even loved him in my own way, but my guilt was more than I could handle right now.

"Okay, Mattie," he continued, "I would like your permission to speak with you individually about what led you to this event. I think it best to keep the conversation private just doctor to patient."

"Dr. Green, I'm not sure how I feel about that," Emilio said and I cringed slightly. He noticed my movement and sighed, "That...that will be fine. When would you like to start?"

"Now is good. However, first I'd like to speak with you, sir. Perhaps Owen and Mattie can step out for a few moments?" Sean suggested. Owen stood and offered me his hand. I reluctantly took it and followed him to the door. "I'll open the door in a few moments," Sean said as we left.

Sean

"Please, Mr. Cardoza, tell me from your perspective what you feel led your wife to try and take her own life," I asked Mr. Cardoza.

He sighed, "Call me Emilio. If you are involved with the Hernandez family then you are already quite aware of my lifestyle, Dr. Green. Mattie didn't want this and honestly, I wasn't kind in the beginning." His hands shook as he spoke and I noticed tears forming in his eyes. "What I am saying now, goes no further than this room. It is private, there are no recording devices allowed in our private chambers and you may only speak of these facts in regards to her treatment. I understand if you share with your husband for the bonds of marriage are also sacred, but he must keep them private."

I leaned forward, "I assure you that I mean you and your wife no harm, Emilio. I just need to have honesty and trust to help her. If details are omitted then I might advise the wrong course of treatment and that could be even more dangerous."

He sighed, "I know, and that's why I need to confess my role in her suffering. Please understand, I love her - more than my own life, I love her, but in the beginning, I did not treat her right. I treated her like a possession, a prize to be won. I kidnapped her, then essentially raped her in front of my men. I...I had them place the Cardoza brand on her shoulder." His chest shuddered as he waited for my shock and response. Of course, I already knew all of these details, but he didn't know that.

"Did she receive any treatment for these events?" I asked, trying not to punch the man.

"Roberto treated her wounds, but no, not any form of therapy. I mean, she seemed to be getting better. Yes, she cried often, but I thought it was only because she missed her daughter," he said.

"Daughter? Did something happen to the child," I asked, curious to see what he could say.

"Well, no, not really. When I kidnapped her, I offered to bring her here, but Mattie wanted her to remain with her father. She was afraid of the cartel lifestyle harming her. I thought I was doing what she wanted, now I don't know. Fuck, I'm a goddamn monster," he swore. "How am I supposed to help her and our child if she hates me?"

"Your child," I asked, completely confused. "Is her daughter yours?"

"No," he whispered. "She's pregnant. Not far along, Doc found out when she...she..." his words dropped off.

My stomach sank. "Emilio, please understand that Mattie has been through a series of traumatic events in a very short time. Even with happy events, it has all taken a toll on her mind. Did she know about the pregnancy when she made the attempt?"

He shook his head, "She had a passing thought, but hadn't found out. I think something happened at the Gala to upset her, but she won't talk to me anymore. She was happy before that despite...how we started, Dr. Green, we do love each other. I just want her healthy and happy again, please."

"I can't make any promises. Mental health is a tricky thing, but I can promise to do all I can. Now, I'd like to visit with your wife," I said as we stood and I opened the door slightly. "Mattie, can you come back in? I'm sure Owen and your husband can find something to entertain themselves," I smiled at her. She seemed a bit shaken up and Owen gave me a look of worry.

"Sure, thing Dr. Green," she said and slipped in the room as Emilio Cardoza walked out to my waiting husband.

Owen

"How are you feeling?" I asked her as we waited in the hall. She had sat down in a nondescript chair just outside the door.

She gave a hollow laugh, "How do I fucking look, Owen?" I raised my eyebrows and tapped my ears.

"No bugs in the hallway, not here at least. Emilio wants us to have absolute privacy down here. Might want to sweep your room though," she scoffed. "Why are you here?"

"To make sure you are safe," I told her honestly.

"Does Nova know?" she asked, her voice wavering.

"Mattie, until we entered the room, we didn't know. We only got intel that your husband had shut off the compound and there was a family emergency involving you. That was all we needed to know to come running," I told her honestly.

Her eyes watered, "Thank you, I guess. You all really need to just leave me to rot. I mean, fuck, Victor was right - what kind of mother abandons her child...and now, well now I get to screw up another one," she muttered.

"You're pregnant?" I asked for clarification. She only nodded. I would need to speak with Victor about her comment later. Fuck, could that have been the tipping point? "Do you want the baby, Mattie?"

She nodded, "I know that makes me horrible, but I want it. Emilio may have done horrible things, but this is an innocent baby. I can't...I can't, I didn't realize," she started to sob and I got down on my knees in front of her, just putting my arms around her as she cried. No words would soothe this, so I offered none. Instead, I just let her cry.

The door opened as we stood, "Mattie, can you come back in? I'm sure Owen and your husband can find something to entertain themselves," Sean smiled at her. He noticed her shaken state and I gave him a worried look.

"Sure, thing Dr. Green," she said and slipped into the room as Emilio Cardoza walked toward me. The door closed and the man next to me seemed to deflate.

"Come, Mr. Green, I'll give you a tour of the compound," he said. We walked in silence for a bit, then he began telling me where things were located. He showed me the dining hall, the kitchens, and a large gathering room and then he pointed out other wings, mentioning those were off-limits. "Do you think your husband can help her?" he finally asked. I was surprised to hear the sincerity in his voice.

"I think Sean will do everything he can for her, Mr. Cardoza," I told him honestly. This wasn't going to be a rescue mission and we had to make sure the others understood that. We might end up being here for a long time.

"I just don't want her to hurt. It's all my fault," he mumbled.

"Mr. Cardoza, pardon my boldness, but have you considered seeking help yourself? This is a traumatic event for you as well, and I'm sure you need someone to talk with." He looked at me in surprise and laughed.

"You are a surprise, Mr. Green. Most men wouldn't dare say such a thing to me," he laughed again. "However, you're probably right. Perhaps you can be my listener. That way you and your husband can have all the details," he scoffed.

"Call me Owen, and sir, I would never cross that boundary. Sean doesn't discuss his patients with me."

He waved his hand, "No worries, Owen. I gave him permission to talk with you. I trust the bonds of marriage when it comes to secrets. Keeping things from each other will destroy you. Better to be upfront, even with the ugly details, from the beginning."

"I see," I hummed, "Well then if I am free to relay details to Sean, then I will gladly offer my ear." I coughed, "Albeit, I am aware of your profession, but have little to no knowledge beyond B-grade mafia movies."

He let out a howling laugh and slapped my shoulder, "That is the best thing I've ever heard, Owen. Come on, let's sit out in the gardens while they chat. You can tell me about yourself and I'll confess some of my sins."

Author's Notes:  Any guesses where thing will go now?