draw, write! just goddamn get this feeling down on a paper, encapsulate it, give it meaning and life and longevity and whatever else you can possibly give it.

enlightened. everything sparks a new creative thought. I am surrounded by chaotic meaning, understanding of a world that prior existed. something insane. I feel exasperation for not being able to put any of my experience down in words in a way that'll capture its essence in a somewhat accurate manner.

what is this? I hate it. I feel like a prisoner in my own mind's cage. everything that wants to leap out, be expressed, is held behind bars of uncertainty. I want catharsis, I want it down and done, jotted into existence, released from its prison. I want to be rid of it. but I can't bring myself to it, because a part of me wants it to last forever; the divine inspiration, the enlightened eye, the brilliant shine of intelligence. is it real?