Cute

Saina's

I WOKE up extra early that Monday morning. Ughh! I have always hated Mondays. I remember, I used to ask myself why Monday is so far from Saturday and Sunday. It's only seven in the morning and I was walking along the long corridors of the 27th floor where my office is located. Tulad pa rin ng dati, hindi pa rin tumitigil si Papa. Araw – araw pa rin siyang pumapasok sa office tapos niyayamot niya ako, halos nakikialam na nga siya sa mga imbestigador, mabuti na lang at professional talaga ang mga iyon, maybe other than the fact that they are loyal to Gabriel Consunji kaya hindi sila nagpapaapekto sa mga nangyayari sa paligid nila.

I sighed as I took a sip of my coffee, I just wish this will end soon. Gusto ko nang bumalik sa normal na buhay, iyong kaming dalawa lang ni Haniel at focused ako sa kanya. I have a lot of businesses with my friends, I co-founded a beauty line which is now one of the top selling brands in the Philippines, and we are trying to enter the Sout East Asian market pero hindi ako maka-focus ngayon sa trabahong iyin dahil sa kawalang-hiyaang nangyari dito sa family business na kagagawan naman ng sarili kong tatay. I rolled my eyes, why is everything in my life so complicated? Ang gusto ko lang naman ay tahimik na buhay – kunsabagay, wala namang bagay sa mundo ang ginusto natin at madali nating nakuha.

Isang example noon si Haniel, when I found out I was pregnant with him, I was really happy, I told myself that finally, I have something of my own, a person that I know will love me unconditionally – but having him wasn't easy. I have my mom with me, but because Haniel was my first baby, ang hirap – hirap niyang dalhin. He keeps on slipping – maselan ang pagbubuntis ko noon, the doctors put me to bed rest and then I had to gain weight because I was too thin, ang hirap magpataba noon, sobrang hirap ng dinaanan ko just to have Haniel with me, but then when I finally held him in my arms the day he was born, I told myself that everything is worth it.

I smiled upon remembering my baby boy. He really is my baby, kahit anong edad yata ni Haniel, I will treat him as my baby because he will always be my baby.

Paliko na ako papuntsa sa office ko when I bumped to the floor cleaner, dahil sa pagkakabangga niya sa akin ay natapon ang coffee ko sa damit ko, glad na hindi na ganoong kainit ang iniinom ko.

"Naku, Miss Saina! Sorry po! Sorry po talaga!" Todo naman ang paghingi niya sa akin ng tawad. I looked at the old man apologizing to me and I tried so hard to smile – kahit sa loob – loob ko ay hindi na ako makahinga sa sobrang inis, but then, I understand na hindi niya sinadya kaya mas pinili ko na lang na ngumiti sa kanya.

"Okay lang po, sa susunod, ingat na lang po ha?" Wika ko. Imbes na sa office ako magpunta ay dumiretso ako sa common restroom, may sarili sana akong restroom kaya lang kandado ang office ni Papa ngayon. I rolled my eyes. Kailan kaya siya susuko, I just want this to end.

Nakatayo ako sa tapat ng salamin. Hindi naman ganoon karami ang dumi sa blazer ko. Mabuti nga at hindi puti ang suot kong inner shirt kundi wala rin akong masusuot. Maybe I'll just ask a friend of mine to get me clothes to the mall para mapalitan ko ito. I took my blazer of, ininspeksyon ko muna kung okay naman ang inner shirt ko, kung masagwa ba ang pagkakatapon ng kape o kung kailangan kong umuwi para magpalit. I even smelled myself to make sure that I smell fine – but I smell like coffee, and maybe that's good enough.

I sighed again. Nag-wisik na lang ako ng kaunting pabango, I brushed my hair and then I left the restroom. Tinutupi ko ang blazer ko habang naglalakad, siyempre hindi na naman ako nakatingin sa dinaraanan ko kaya nabunggo na naman ako, I was so sure that because of the impact, I will fall on the floor, and I was waiting for the impact but then, I felt something warm and hard wrapped around my waist, nakapikit ako noon, but when I felt a warm air near my neck, I opened my eyes and I found my father's lead attorney – si Jose Gerardo Birada, noong una ay walang reaction sa mukha niya, but maybe when he recognized me, he grinned – oh that fucking grin – inis na inis na naman ako.

"Hey, Saina." Suwabeng – swabeng wika niya. "Did I make your morning?" Tumaas ang kilay ko. Ang kapal ng mukha, akala niya ba lahat ng babae luluhod sa harapan niya dahil lang sa hitsura niya? I know boys like him – yes, he's still a boy – a man will never ever do this kind of thing. Sa inis ko ay tinapakan ko ang paa niya. Nakabitaw siya sa akin, mabuti na lang at naalalayan ko ang sarili ko, I was able to stand straight and raised my left brow.

"Puta--- ang--- argh! Why are you like this to me?!" Inis na sigaw niya sa akin.

"Because you're a fucking asshole!"

"What makes you say that huh?" Patalon – talon siya nang nakataas ang isang paa habang nakaharap sa akin. Gusto kong matawa nang malakas, mukha kasi siyang tanga.

"Mukha kang natapakang chewing gum, ang kapal ng mukha mo." I hissed at him, tinapakan kong muli ang paa niya tapos ay nilayasan ko siya. I was smiling so wide when I passed by him, hanggang sa makapasok ako sa temporary office ko ay tawang – tawa ako sa kanya. Ang yabang kasi niya, paanong hindi ako maiinis sa kanya? Dalawang beses pa lang kaming nagkaka-usap pero kung kausapin niya ako para bang may gusto ako sa kanya.

I admit, may hitsura si Birada – may dalawang mata, isang ilong, bibig at dalawang tainga siya. May hitsura siya, pero kapag binuka na niya ang bibig niya, naiirita ako sa kanya, punyeta siya.

That afternoon, I had a meeting with my father, his team and Gabriel Consunji's team. Tahimik lang akong nakamasid sa kanila habang tinatanong nila si Papa, isa – isa kung saan napunta ang mga perang nawawala at hindi nakalista sa libro ng kompanya, kaharap din namin ang mga tao sa finance at accounting department.

"It's my money too, I can do whatever I want with it..." Nakangising wika ni Papa.

"Mr. Buensuceso, may I just remind you that your money is separated from the company's money. Hindi ninyo pera ito, ito ay nasa kompanya, ang mga perang ipinasok ng mga investors at clients ay para sa kompanya at hindi para sa personal ninyong gain." Mr. Manato told my father. I was just observing them.

"Technically, it is their money." Sumabat naman si Birada. "Look at Miss Perfect here, hindi ba't nakatapos siya ng pag – aaral, dahil sa perang dala ang kompanya? She's supposed to be investigated to, but why is she the CEO of this company? The CEOship should be brought back to Mr. Buensuceso, it's his right, he is the founder of this company."

"Excuse me." Tumuwid ako ng tayo. I caught everyone's attention. "May I just share to the group that my father only supported my until high school. When I turned seventeen, my mother gave me enough money to invest to the stock market, from then on, my dear Jose Gerardo Birada, I've been earning my OWN money, and it is UNDER MY OWN NAME, not my mother's not my father's. At the age of twenty, I invested to my first company, and at the age of twenty-four, I am already a millionaire, not because of my father or my mother or because of this name, I am who I am because of me. Please, do your research if you're going to use me as an example, mapapahiya ka lang."

Nakipagtitigan ako sa kanya. I saw how his Adam's apple moved. Akala ko ay tapos na but he still had something to say.

"Saan ba galing ang perang iyon?" Ugh! He had the gall! I took a deep breath.

"From my abuela. Okay ka na? May tanong ka pa o baka gusto mong ipakita ko pa ang mga bank accounts ko para matahimik ka? Are you sure you're a corporate lawyer? Bakit hindi ka marunong mag-research? Ni hindi mo man lang tinanong iyang kliyente mo, eh di pahiya ka?"

"Alam mo, Miss Perfect—"

"Oh you flatter me so much, I am indeed perfect!"

"Mama mo Perfect!" Biglang tayo si Birada. Parang iiyak na siya – I wanted to laugh but then our argument was interrupted by our phones ringing. Agad kong kinuha iyon, wala sana akong balak sagutin pero nakita kong tumatawag ang home room adviser ni Haniel. I picked that up immediately.

"Yes, hello, Miss Mira?" I asked in a polite tone. Birada excused himself too. I rolled my eyes. "What?" Hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig ko. The teacher said that Haniel cute classes! He's only in Grade 5! Paanong magka-cure classes siya. "Is Haniel with you?" I asked again.

"Anong nangyayari sa apo ko?" Tanong naman ni Papa. Hindi ko siya sinagot. Agad kong kinuha ang bag ko.

"I'll be there, Miss Mira."

"Saina, anong nangyayari sa apo ko?!"

"No, Papa, you don't get to use that tone on me. I told you, you cannot see my son, you're a danger to him. After what you did to Adriel Consunji, do you really expect me to let you near my precious boy?" Nanunumbat ako. Biglang napaupo si Papa. Wala na akong pakialam kung anong isipin ng mga tao sa loob ng conference room. I want to get out of here, my son needs me.

"Excuse me, gentlemen, I have an emergency. Please carry on. Patricia, record the meeting for me."

My heart is beating so fast, isa lang ang naiisip ko kaya nag – cut ng class si Haniel, something bad happened and I cannot calm down.

xxxx

TWENTY minutes later, I arrived at his school. I was biting my lip while walking towards the office. Ang sabi ng adviser ay sa guidance office raw kami mag – uusap. Hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko, this is the first time this happened. Gusto ko sana munang makausap si Haniel bago ako makipag – usap sa kahit na kanino para maintindihan ko siya, para maipaliwanag ko sa kanila kung bakit ganoon ang naging action ng anak ko.

"Miss Saina Buensuceso?" A woman, wearing a teacher's uniform with long hair and kind smile approached me. I smiled nervously at her.

"Miss Mira?"

"Yes, nice to finally meet you. Iyong Papa ni Haniel kasi ang nakilala ko noong first day of school kaya hindi po ako sure kung kayo po ang mother niya."

"I am his mother, where is he?" Nag-aalalang lumingon – lingon pa ako.

"Sa kasalukuyan po, Miss Saina, nasa clinic po si Haniel." My eyes widened. Napahawak ako sa dibdib ko.

"Wh—what happened to my boy?" High pitched na ang boses ko.

"I'll explain further, punta na po tayo sa loob." She guided me inside the guidance office. Pagpasok ko roon ay napansin ko ang isang pigura ng isang lalaki at isang batang lalaking tahimik na umiiyak sa may gilid. He was clutching on his school pants, parang hindi na nga siya makahing. He was also biting his lips – one sign that he maybe experiencing anxiety. Nakaramdam ako ng awa sa bata.

"Miss, sit here." Wika ng isang middle aged na babae. I did, I sat on the chair just beside the man who was already there. I put my bag on my lap, and then I took one glimpse on the man beside me – unang tingin, hindi nag-register sa akin kung sino siya but then when I realized, muli na naman akong nakatingin, sa pagkakataong iyon ay nakatitig na rin siya sa akin.

"Birada..." I gritted my teeth. Nakasimangot siya sa akin.

"It seems that you two know each other. Mr. Birada, this is Miss Saina Buensuceso, she is the mother of the boy who fell from the tree."

"WHAT?! The boy—my Haniel fell from the tree?! WHY?!" Napatayo na naman ako. Napasigaw na rin, mukhang nagulat ang guidance counselor, pero dahil yata sa pagtaas ng boses ko, napaiyak ang bata sa gilid. Bigla siyang tumayo at lumapit sa akin, he stopped in front of me, and then he started to cry frantically.

"Sorry po, kasalanan ko po." Sabi noong batang lalaki. "Sinabi naman po ni Hanhan na ayaw niya pong magpunta sa garden sa likod pero pinilit ko siyang doon kumain, sorry po, sinabi niyang di siya marunong umakyat sa puno pero pinilit ko pa rin po kasi gusto kong matuto siya, sorry po, h'wag ninyo pong papakulong ang Papa ko!"

Sisigok – sigok ang bata, and my heart it just... well I am a mother and he's the same age as my son and he's crying like this, and my heart just melted. Iyak lang siya nang iyak habang paulit – ulit nag-so-sorry sa akin. Napahawak na naman ako sa dibdib ko.

"Joshua..." Malamyos iyong tinig na tinawag siya ni teacher Mira. Agad namang lumapit si Joshua sa teacher niya. "Labas muna tayo, mag-uusap si Daddy at iyong Mommy ni Hanhan. Gusto mo bang puntahan si Hanhan sa clinic?" Tumango na lang si Joshua, lumabas sila ng guidance, ako naman ay hinahabol pa sila ng tingin. When the door closed, I sat on the chair again and looked at the counselor.

"Can I go see my son?" I asked her.

"Mag – uusap muna po tayo. We have consequences here, Mr. Birada. Nakalagay iyon sa manual natin, Joshua is suspended for three days because of—"

Napakunot ang noo ko. I raised my fore finger to stop the old woman from talking.

"You're suspending a twelve year old boy – a crying twelve year old boy who apologized repeatedly? Really?"

"Miss, nabalian ng kamay ang anak mo dahil sa kanya—"

"I know, but didn't you see that he was sorry for whatever it is that happened?!" I hissed. "He's just a kid, the other kid involve is my son, pareho silang bata, both didn't know what to do yet, why are you blaming the boy for it? I am not even blaming him for what happened to my son. Naniniwala akong sa pagkakamali natututo ang mga bata, even adults learn from mistakes. If you want you can talk to the boy, make him understand what he did wrong, hindi iyong suspension na agad, at ikaw Birada, wala ka man lang bang gagawin, you were so loud and talkative earlier in the conference room, tapos pagdating sa suspension, uupo ka lang diyan? Bobo ka ba?"

I looked at the old lady again.

"I want to see my son. Mas kailangan niya ako kaysa dito ako, can I leave now?" Huminga ako nang malalim at saka tinalikuran sila. I asked around for the clinic, in ten minutes nakarating rin ako and the first that I saw is my son, crying, while holding Joshua's hands.

"Sorry, Hanhan, hindi naman ko iyon sinasadya!"

"I don't understand anything you're saying but you're making me cry, please don't cry." Hindi ko alam kung matatawa ako o maiiyak sa mga batang ito. Hindi pala sila nagkakaintindihan. I sighed and walked to them. I touched Joshua's shoulder, he looked at me.

"Hi, Joshua, are you Haniel's best friend?" He nodded. I kneeled in front of him para magkapantay na kaming dalawa. I smiled at him while wiping his tears away.

"Don't cry, love, it's not your fault. Nobody expected an accident, everything will be okay. Alright?"

"Hindi... hindi makukulong si Daddy? Kasi wala akong Mommy kapag wala na rin si Daddy ulila na po ako."

My mouth parted. I cupped his face.

"No, love, hindi makukulong ang Daddy mo. Haniel is okay, he will get better. You shouldn't cry so much because you're a big boy and you need a lot of energy, don't waste it in crying 'cause I already told you, diba? Everything is okay..."

And just like that the boy – Joshua, launched himself on me and hugged me tightly. I embraced him back, I was caressing his back to help him calm down.

"It's gonna be fine, Love. It will be, alright? Stop crying..."

"Thank you po... thank you po Mommy..."

Natigilan ako. He called me Mommy... that's kind of cute.