38

"This is all because of you. Everytime we fall in some problem, it is because you couldn't keep it in your pants!"

I nodded, "Ofcourse! I was the one who gave money to Carter to loose the case and give him an opportunity, on a golden platter."

He rolled his eyes, and then fully turned to me, "We'd have to become a bit more responsible with our choices David. We have a family behind us. Both of us. Your indulgence in women was something I never appreciated, but it was fine since those women themselves were mad after you. But..if it comes biting back...that's a huge problem."

I didn't want to agree but he wasn't wrong. The women. They have never been the graceful part of my life. I remember Lilliana forgetting her limits just a few months back, and now this. Even after marrying Hope and practicing perfect loyalty, it questions my character in the worst way. Just because she is understanding, i cannot be free of the guilt. Now, even Erica was involved.

"I understand. I'll try to remain cautious."

At my words he scowled, "Cautious while interacting with women?"

I knew what he implied.

"I am perfectly loyal to my wife, and will remain so. I am saying I'll be cautious to not associate with people who are anyhow related to those women."

He examined me carefully for a while before he sighed, seemingly satisfied.

I shook my head and sat back. Stephan was in the front seat.

"Jeffrey is a good lawyer. He recently busted a human trafficking gang and is being given a state award next month."

I rolled my eyes. I already knew this. That was why I asked him to review my sister's case. He will thrash Carter in the court and end his career for good.

This information was demanded by this arrogant asshole, who thinks he alone can do good work.

"Stephan.. also check if David has ever slept with his wife/girlfriend/mother/sister? We do not want the repeat of Carter now? Do we?"

I wanted to thrash him a little but my ringing phone diverted my phone. I saw it was Hope, and my annoyance subsided like ice cold water poured on fire.

I sighed and picked up the call, "Hey Hopeless!"

I heard her chuckle, most probably to Oliver, who must be somewhere near, "Hey...David...where are you?"

I looked out of the window, "Uh...just entering back in the city. What is it?"

"Uhm...please do me a favour...can you go to Harry's penthouse and bring some files that I need. Actually he has to leave this evening for Spain, and is a little down with fever so he can't come here. You told me you'd be in that direction so.."

"Ofcourse I'd go... anything else?"

"Uhmmm....no...just that Oliver is missing you!"

"That rat can never miss me...he's probably trying to woo you in my absence."

I heard him blabber something in the background.

"Here...tell Dadda you miss him..."

After a lot of coaxing, he did admit, "missu dadda!". The words they merged together, but it was adorable nonetheless.

"What do you want when I come back?"

His reply was immediate as if he was waiting to make a demand, "Lopop!"(Lollipop)

I shook my head smiling, "Okay I'll bring 'Lopop' for you...be a good man till then."

When I disconnected the call, Eric was already looking at me, relaxed and smug.

"See...that's all my doing. You should kiss the soil I walk on."

I ignored him and looked at Stephan.

"Stephan drop me at Harry's penthouse. I have some work there.."

"Okay!", and then he directed the driver, to my displeasure already knowing the address. Looks like he came here alot with Hope.

I hid my displeasure, under the scrutiny of this play pretend cop siting beside me, and stayed silent till they finally dropped me off. My mind wasn't silent though. I wondered how it would be for Hope to know my rendezvous popping back like this, when all she does is loves me. She acted so maturely in case of Lilliana, which was something unnatural. Why does this woman never complain? Even I never saw her throwing a tantrum. Last night, she opened up a little, telling me about her displeasure, but that was all. When I asked her to punish me, she ended up kissing me. But well, my proposal of suffocating me was ridiculous, and i realised this after i replayed the events of the night this morning while taking a shower. What happens to my maturity around her? I start feeling like that irresponsible teenager that I was with her back in school.

With my countless thoughts swimming in my mind, i rang the doorbell to Harry's penthouse, on the seventeenth floor exactly. I thought only Eric was obsessed with heights. 

A minute later, a very familiar women opened the door, who was none other than Cia, Harry's fiance.

"Hey David! Please welcome. C'mon in.."

I greeted her and asked about her well being, before finally entering.

"How's Harry? Hope told me he's down with fever."

She nodded, a bit tense, "Yeah! A 101 degrees. I was asking him to delay his trip but he is hard to convince. He's in the dining room."

When I went in and saw the spacious dining room, Harry was sitting on the couch, a folded blanket kept on the side, and he was shuffling between few files.

"Hey David!", he greeted me as soon as he spotted me, "Please feel at home."

Him and Cia started living together after their engagement, which was a real person one, and a celebration was still due. Although I have not interacted with them much, but I know enough from what Hope told me.

I took a seat across him, and Cia asked me, "What would you like to have? Hope tells us you love her coffee."

I nodded and smiled, "I actually do. But she makes it a certain way, that elaborated method."

"I'll try but I won't promise it will surpass hers."

I chuckled, and looked at Harry who was smiling, "I miss her coffee now. But Cia...yours will do. For now."

She left and then Harry started assembling the files before me, "These are the papers of some properties that she has owned since like forever, but due to her travelling job, and wanting to stay carefree, she kept all this here. Now I am handing this over to you. Enjoy keeping her assets safe."

I chuckled, "And I thought she's very responsible about her things."

He agreed, "She is. But she has always been a little carefree because of me. And we lived in the same city, so it made this all easier. But I guess when you have a elder brother or sister, it's fine to be a little careless."

I agreed whole heartedly, but my heart gaped at how my little sister had spent a major part of her life, trying to be responsible, because I wasn't there, unaware of her existence. And when I got to know about her, she was already a fine woman.

"Hope loves to be a mystery, but I'd like to think it's different with you.", he said making me look up at him.

I shrugged, "No...she likes to stay quiet most of the time, unless I poke her endlessly. Honestly, i have to uncover truths like an analyst."

I was reminded of how I figured out the name of her lover boy, that is me, after so much deliberation. She would have saved so much effort on my part.

"That means she did not tell you the name of that boy? Didn't she?"

His question caught me off guard for a moment. And now if that comes to it, i realised Hope has not told my name to her brother also. Wow!

"What boy?", I tried to play coy.

And he understood my attempt at that so easily, that I faced a huge bout of embarrassment. Hope! I am coming for revenge.

He laughed, "Hope would have never married you if you did not already knew of her love in school. Or if she did, she would have sat you down on a lunch and told you everything. Of all the things she preaches, transparency is the topmost."

I sighed, sitting back, trying to relax, "She didn't tell me. It was Hailey who told me about her miserable state when she came from school. I did question her over this, but her answers were always dodgy."

He narrowed his eyes, "I don't know why she does that. Infact, all my life I have been planning to thrash this guy who didn't love her back. But she never uttered his name."

I squirmed a little in my seat, and by then Cia also came with coffee for both of us.

"Why are you not sitting with us?", Harry questioned as he saw just two mugs.

She smiled, "Because of your fever and my work, i have not gone on the grocery hunt for a week now and now that David is here to keep you company, I shall go. I'll not take more than an hour."

"Cia? I am sure he has work."

I decided to intervene, "Don't worry Cia! Other than buying lollipop for Oliver, i have no urgent work for today. I'll stay with Harry till you come back."

"Are you sure?", The man asked, feeling a bit dangerous after his threat to thrash me.

"Yeah absolutely.", he's Hope's brother, the least I can do is try bonding with him.

She left after a few minutes and then he resumed the conversation from where we left, "So as I was saying, I am surprised she didn't tell his name to you even. You were there with her. You must know him."

A little nervous, but composed, "Yeah...I must know him. But Hope wants to stay silent. May be she still loves that guy." I pray she does.

He examined me a little, but then looked away, "We are talking about her David. She must have loved anyone, but now that she has married you, all her heart is into this marriage. She doesn't do things half heartedly."

I agreed, without any doubt, "I know, and I'd be damned if I believe otherwise."

He sipped on his coffee, and then kept it aside, "You know i have seen her with your son. And she seems beautifully evolved. Like, i didn't know motherhood would suit her this much."

I hummed, "She's better with him than I'll ever be. Disciples him. Keeps him calm and grounded. If someone saw her from far, they'll think she mother to a bunch of children."

He laughed at that, "I am glad you think like that about her, and recognise her worth. I have been very apprehensive since she decided to marry you."

"I understand. That's your concern. But believe, despite what it may look, I have her best interests in my heart. If something hurts her, it will tear me apart. Before everything, she is my very dear friend."

He remained silent for a while, as if contemplating something, "I am glad she got a chance at love with you. You atleast realise her importance as a person. I was only afraid she'd get stuck up with some insensitive man who'll only feel the wound to his ego because she literally loved some guy back in school. Men are not always kind."

Hope was a mystery, a beautiful red haired mystery. She didn't ever tell me about her feelings. She didn't even tell her brother about me. May be because she wanted to protect me. Or may be she didn't want to associate with me anytime in the future.

As soon as the darker of my thoughts started clouding me, i looked at him, "Harry...can you tell me something?"

He nodded, "Ofcourse! Ask away."

"I..i searched for Hope alot after she abruptly left school. Her leaving, it didn't do me any good. She was my only friend there other than Eric. Can you tell me what exactly happened when she came back to you? I mean...was she not okay.,.uh well I am sure she was not okay...but.."

He sighed, most probably reminiscing the old times. He stood up from the couch, and went towards the window.

I examined his every step, bracing myself. I don't know what he'd say, but I somehow was aware, it wouldn't be something to my liking.

"I did not know about her coming back, unless Mom called me, telling me that Hope was back home, and she was not herself. Her coming back, it was abrupt but I thought maybe she's missing home. And we have just lifted ourselves back after Dad's demise. Mom was struggling. I was struggling and she was also a little girl.

I was on this internship in Pennsylvania, so as soon as I got time, I left to meet her. I wish I went there sooner, because she was miserable. Her face was visibly pale, and she looked like she was in some pain. Taking her away from mom, who was also worried about her, I asked her what was wrong. I was afraid that someone may be bullied her, or it was some harrasment case as it was very common those days. She refused to tell me anything. I tried alot. Even extended my holiday to stay with her. But she wasn't ready to budge. A week later, i made a resolve to go to California, your school. I knew about you and Eric, not much but enough to know that you will be able to inform me if something happened. Infact, she even told me when you saved her from some bullies. And how your friendship started. When she came to know about this, she tried everything to stop me.

I was also worried about her year long progress. Your final exams were near, and she was working hard to get into a good college. But she didn't let me leave. And I saw that as an opportunity and kept a condition before her, that if she tells me what actually happened, i won't go and even try to get her admitted somewhere near home.

Thankfully she agreed, but even then she took two days. I forcefully sat her down this time, and grilled her alot. And that was when she broke. She cried for three hours straight! You see how much she was suppressing it. Infact, by the end of it, she was so dehydrated that I got scared and took her to the doctor. Mom was completely oblivious to all this, and i told her I am taking her away to cheer her up. I didn't want to add to her worries.

It was then Hope told me. There was a guy she loved at school. I was taken aback by her seriousness and told her that it was nothing but hormones at place, mere crush that would pass in a few days. But I realised later on about how serious she was. She told me, how good he was to her, and she wanted to hold onto him. Even prepared herself to go tell him about her feelings. But that very day, the guy proposed someone else. I was first enraged at the guy, but then she told me that he had no idea of her feelings. Not that makes my resentment for him go away.

Hope was always her name for her, our little hope. And to see her waning off like that, loosing the glow of her face, her wild hair always tied back like she was restraining herself. The worse happened when her insecurities took over. She thought she wasn't lovable or attractive. She even went further to cut her meals to stay in shape, which further deteriorated her health. I knew she was struggling emotionally, but when the physical consequences took over, I simply lost it. I tried to make her understand her value, but that incident scarred her. In her new school, she made no friends. Infact, I think she never accepted anybody more than acquaintances after that. Erica was her first friend after years, and may be that was also because she was associated with Eric.

I was scared she would do some self harm, so i cancelled my internship in the middle, and began freelancing to stay closer to her. On top of it all, she missed Dad. Dad was her anchor, always. And i felt the responsibility to take his place in her life. I couldn't leave her feeling alone.

Then one day, about a month later, I woke up and went in her room to check on her. She wasn't there, so i went to ask Mom. She told me that she went near the lake, that was at some distance from our home. Lake was her safe place, it is so, even today. But something inside me told me to check on her. To atleast take a look from far, and then leave her alone.

To the way on the lake, there was a highway, not really busy, but a cargo road, nonetheless. It was early morning so there are never many trucks there. I went there, and saw her sitting hunched. From the distance, it looked like she was sitting, but when I went near, I saw her body moving. She was clearly crying.

I was baffled. She was fine the night before.

When I went near her, she hugged me tight. I asked what happened or if she was crying for that guy again. But what she told me, simply shook me. That morning, she had barely saved herself from getting hit by a truck. Her body was shaking, and her voice was terrified. I was terrified too, but as a big brother, I had no time to be scared.

I tried to calm her nerves, told her to realise how important life is. And that love shouldn't make us weak, no matter we get that person in the end or not. I guess that accident, it snapped something inside her. I never saw her crying since then. The woman she became, was a force to reckon with. She topped her university, began her startup in her last year only, and made us all proud.

But there were days, I'd see a vulnerability clouding her figure. I realised what it was when she finally decided to date. But her decision, it didn't do her well. 'I don't know why I can't be myself with these guys. They..they don't make sense in my life.' She was still not over that guy, the guy who i underestimated as just a random crush who she would get over soon. That is what worried me so much when I came to know about her decision to marry you.

I didn't want to interfere in her life, but marriage was a lifelong commitment. She couldn't remain unfulfilled for her entire life, just because you didn't make sense to her. But I am not a fool to ignore the changes in her. May be it is because of Oliver. Or may be it is because she finds security with you. She told me that she would eventually love you, like a wife. Marriage is a strong institution after all. But I didn't want my sister to settle for any less. I know a lot of her side is not even known by me. She never told me anything. I had to dig out stuff to make her feel at ease. May be, someday, when she finds love in you, she'd tell you all about it. And that day, please hear her out and love her fully."

I was dazed, frozen, and a little disturbed as I heard him narrate it all. It broke a part of me, and mended another. Who could tell that her school girl love would surpass the extent of so much. When I realised she loved me, i didn't realised she loved me so much. From this moment onwards, Hope was a completely different woman for me. A woman who loved me, or perhaps loves me like no another.

I sat there, for what felt like an eternity, absorbing it all. Her insecurities gnawing at the walls of my heart. Why would she hide her love for so many years? Heck! Why would she love for so many years? She should have hated me when I reappeared in her life. And she should have slapped me when I asked her to marry me, but instead, this woman had to go ahead and embrace her heartache, me, fight with the world to solve my problems. And whenever her vulnerability expressed itself because I was being a fool, she would just give me a silent treatment and then eventually give up before my relentless apologies.

"I told this to you because you deserve to know it as her friend, well wisher and her husband. And I am damn sure she did not tell you all this."

I shook my head, "Not even an atom of this." My voice came out lower and more dazed than I wanted to.

He sighed and came back to sit across me, "I knew it. But you know, there's a difference between you and me. You are her friend, and I am her brother. May be she'd feel more open while telling you. Just don't pester her too much or she will have my head for telling you."

I smiled, "I won't."

"And yeah! If you find about that guy, tell me. I want to settle a score with him."

I shifted a little on the couch, "A score. The poor guy probably didn't even know of her feelings."

"He didn't.", he agreed, "But that doesn't mean his existence didn't hurt my little sister."

Oh! So my existence is also going to be a bane for me. I rubbed my forehead with my finger.

"You don't be stressed. I only wanted to tell you so you understand if there's some restraint from her side."

Thinking of her, my stance suddenly softened, "Harry...Hope is my only hope in life right now. I promise you I'll protect her and her heart till my last breath. That's the vow I had made to myself on the day of our wedding."

When I left, an understanding was already established between me and him. We both held a deep and profound protectiveness over Hope, and that was the very basis of the bond that I intended to make with him.

*

When I reached home, Oliver was taking his usual nap. I placed his different flavours of Lollipops beside him. He'd be elated once he wakes up.

Hope was sitting across on a three seater and working on something in her laptop. Her earpod was on, and she was having a conversation with Rebecca, most probably.

When I whispered, "Hi Hopeless!", she only nodded at me, and got back to her work. Someone seems busy.

I removed my blazer and threw it on the coffee table. My eyes, they were refusing to leave her. As I said, Hope in my eyes was completely different now. Until now, she was a humble abode, filled with warmth within, but now, i could see the cracks in that home, that cracks that were firmly stitched together. The cold of the world couldn't break through those crack, but holding them tight was painful enough.

I could feel my heart ache badly. The almost accident. What if something happened to her? I would have never seen her again. A dark shadow surrounded my heart at that. The guilt, becoming stronger than the grief. I took years from her life, even without knowing. Her brother was right. He should thrash me for that. Infact, I'd even thrash myself if I was him.

How shameful for my existence that there was a woman in the world filled with love for me, and I went to random women out of spite thinking the one woman I loved is dead now.

When it became too much for me- my thoughts, I decided to take a deep breath and seek comfort in her.

I removed my shoes and went to her. I laid on the couch and kept my head on her lap. Turning, I nuzzled my face in her stomach and breathed in her scent, trying to relieve the ache in my heart.

"Uh...", i heard her gasp. She relaxed after a moment though, and then kept a hand on my head.

Concluding her conversation with Rebecca, she ended the call, and then her complete attention was on me.

"Dave? All good? You look stressed."

I am not stressed, I am just feeling heavier and wanted to cling to her real bad.

"Just keep your hand on my head.", I took her hand and rested it on my head.

I could feel she was worried, so I kissed her stomach from above her top, "I am not stressed. You know socializing overwhelms me. I met Stephan, Eric, some more chipmunks, Harry, and then even more chipmunks."

She chuckled, "Says the social butterfly."

I scowled moving my head to look at her face, "Don't call me butterfly! You should give me a macho nickname, something that suits my personality."

She rolled her eyes, "Your names perfectly fine. And nicknames are cheesy."

"You are very unromantic Hope!"

Smilingly, she focused on her laptop, unbothered by my declaration or accusation. Her other hand kept playing with my hairs, slowly caressing the scalp in between.

I looked at her, and then all what Harry told me came crashing down upon me. What all she went through, only because she loved me. How will any feeling in my heart justify her feelings. How will I ever be able to make up to her? We may unite and have a happily ever after, but how am I going to do justice with what she went through over the years. My own prejudices, they were at the back of my mind. I realised this wasn't about me or Oliver anymore. Despite my own insecurities, her heart managed to nurture me just fine. And today, i make a vow to myself, that now I am going to make this about her. She has made us the centre of her existence, and now I'll make sure she gets what she deserves. Because from this day on, she is going to be our centre of the world, mine and Oliver's.

*

Thanks for reading. And thank you to all those who left reviews on the book over my profile. Really grateful.