CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT: BLASTER

Addiction begins with the hope that something "out there" can instantly fill up the emptiness inside.
-Jean Kilbourne

In our hotel room there's one giant bed, a small table that has a crappy coffee maker and Styrofoam cups on it, a night stand that has the TV on it across from the bed and a patio. The patio is the best part, because the glass window will let us watch the sun set and rise in our room. And there's a bench seat that we can sit on to watch the stars.

The bathroom, thankfully, has a big counter and a shower that surprisingly big compared to the size of the room we rented.

Jem's already changed into his swim trunks, making me poke fun at the slightly defined abs he has until he pokes me in the tummy and made fun of my lack there of.

He's always been a little shy about just how fit he is, because people are always surprised by it and we both know I'm a little too sensitive about my looks too.

Thought Jeremiah isn't a solid wall of raging male hormones and muscle, he's strong and fit -he's not on the Varsity team for nothing. 

And I'm just me.

Stepping out of the bathroom in my bikini I turn around and motion to my back, "Can you tie this for me Jem?" Humming a yes in reply, he fixes my top as I braid my curls back so my hair doesn't get super messy to the point I can't brush it.

"Hey AJ," My best friend says, giving me a sideways hug. "You know Nell? She's actually really funny and pretty smart. I don't know a lot about her but I think I might want to date her. Do you like her?"

"Hell yeah! I ship it. Please, please talk to her more and set something up. Go Jem!" I cheer, turning around and squeezing him around the middle. "You're a king, Jemmy, and it's about time you have a queen."

Jem laughs, shaking his head at me. "If I'm the king what does that make you?"

"A duchess maybe?" I shrug, not knowing much about royalty besides the basics. "I don't know, I could just be the mysterious dungeon keep that happens to be suspiciously close to the throne and nobody knows what I look like. Mystery. Awe. All things to strive for in life."

Laughing, we leave the room. About half way down the hall is the boy's room and directly across from them are the girls. 

Sometimes me and Jem are criticized for being best friends because some adults don't understand that we've never wanted to be more than friends, that when we have sleepovers we just watch horror movies and play games and throw things at each other while eating junk food.

They say girls and boys can't just be friends.

That's bullshit.

I've gotten criticized for 'friend zoning' Jem, even though he doesn't want to and never has wanted to be more than. Why can they criticize me like that anyway? 

It's not like I owe him a relationship.

The girl's door swings open, and Roby tumbles out rather clumsily. Jem catches her by the shoulders and steadies her before stepping back, a grin on his face. "Don't be as clumsy or random as a blaster, alright?"

Freezing, Robin stares up at him with wide eyes before squealing and rushing him in a hug. "You just quoted Obi-Wan Kenobi!"

If I was any meaner, I would definitely be laughing at the half-shocked half-amused face Jem has while hugging her back.

Nell told Jem that Robin always quotes Star Wars, Star Trek and Stargate and that nobody else she knows does it. Jem, being who he is, started watching those movies and shows when he was nine and hasn't stopped sense. So he can use quotes for every kind of situation, so Roby isn't the only one doing it for once.

He's trying not to make her feel so lonely.

Jem is the best.

"Get off her," Keagan snarls, pulling Roby straight to his chest and glaring at Jem. This time I can't help but to laugh but muffle the sound behind my hand as brown eyes narrow at me. "What's funny Teeny?"

"Nothing much Keg," I say, not able to stop my amusement. "Just -she's the one that hugged him. And I'm pretty sure Jem is a more respectable guy than you, which isn't to say you're not respectable. It's just...he's pretty hard to beat in that sense."

Disagreeing, Jeremiah scoffs to himself but doesn't actually say anything.

I clap my hands, grinning at the group. "Lets go onto the giant ride until all of us fall off."

Behind me, Micah chuckles. "Why does that even sound fun to you? You're the smallest one here."

"No! Roby is the smallest one here, I'm just the shortest." I grin proudly, going on my toes to ruffle his surprisingly soft dark brown hair. "And I bet Jem will fall off first so...chances are you'll laugh."

"Yeah," Keagan agrees with me, making me raise an eyebrow in surprise. "And whoever falls out first should pay for food later, and whoever falls out last should get first dips of the next thing we do."

"That's a good idea!" I chirp, piratically bouncing in my spot with the energy that I desperately want to get out by sabotaging Micah in all the competitions and games we're going to be playing.

"I'd say thanks if you didn't say that like it was a miracle." The lovable douche grunts, holding Roby closer to him.

It's then I catch the awed and totally in love look that's practically melting out of her blue eyes.

That's adorable!

And almost better than mangoes.

If Keagan wasn't an asshole half the time I would definitely think he's better than mangoes, but I can tell he's getting there. Patience is a fickle thing.

Grabbing towels from the rack, once we get into the 18+ section we run through the space to get to the stairs to the big slide. This is the one where you need the premium deal to get on, and since that's exactly what we have, all Micah- -who is the first one there, which I think is strictly do to Keagan having Roby wrapped in his arms when Jem yelled to race- -has to do is show his wrist band to the worker.

It's probably a good thing that kids aren't allowed in this space, and older adults tend to avoid it. The only people around are other teens and there's not many at that -given it is a school day.

Also now there's better music, mostly just a lot of Set It Off, random pop songs and a few Confetti or Blackbear songs.

Once we get up the stairs, which is an entire three stories length, we just wait for the worker at the bottom to send the giant tube up to us and begin to figure out the rules and seating arrangement.

"Sabotaging is necessary and allowed." Robin says, surprising me enough that she giggles at the confused- -and I'm sure constipated- -look that I send her. "My dummy told me to say it."

"That's me," Mumbles Keagan, who scratches the back of his neck while he flushes just a little. "I'm the dummy."

Nell nods, punching him in the shoulder. "Damn straight you are."

His brown eyes snap down to her with a glare, but all she does is burst into laughter and slap her knee.

"Well slap my knee and call me Jeff!"

Me and Jem say this in sync, but meeting his hazel eyes I can tell he regrets blurting that as much as I did -especially in the horrible southern accident we used.

This comes automatically from us, because when we were playing monopoly in lunch a teacher came up to us to ask what our names were since we were getting loud and fighting over how much debt we were going in. Jeremiah said "It's a Sawyer ma'am, with a Yee-haw on the front end." without missing a beat, knowing that we weren't even the loudest people in the cafeteria.

Of course, not about to let my best friend be on that level of stupid all alone I slapped my knee, put a carrot between my teeth and slurred out, "Well slap my knee and call me Jeff, Yee-haw, cause I ain't never knew you's a Sawyer man!"

The teacher had no clue what to do with us after that, so we didn't get detention but she did ask us to consider counseling. Which of course, only cracked us up more.

"I have no clue what that was," Micah says, pointing his finger at me. "But never again."

Narrowing my eyes I huff at him, but instead of taking my foot stomp seriously he just pokes my nose. So logically, when I choose to snap my chin up and bite his finger it's justified.

What's not justified is the way that- -with dark eyes shining with mischief- -uses that same finger to force my jaw down, lips to part before he leans down and kisses me full force before smugly walking away just as get lost in the feeling.

"Fool of a Took." Jem mutters, knocking on my forehead. "After that you must be stroking out or something."

All I can do is nod, so with a sigh my best friend takes me by the hand and walks me to the tube. I snap out of it when instead of stepping onto the tube itself, I miss and step into the hole -causing my entire body to tumble onto the tube and go where the weight it.

So as I land directly on Micah, the Tube lifts up onto it's side making us tip into the water.

The green eyed boy curses loudly and I squeal as we go straight into the water, leaving the tube behind as we go tumbling down the gigantic slide meant for a six person tube to go from side to side and make people fall off and get splashed with water.

Micah's arms stay wound tight around my hips as we slip down all the turns, close enough so when I shout "Oops!" I know he hears me.

Eventually we land in the pool of water at the end, the worker looking very confused when we first come out of it with no tube, and that's when Micah lets go.

"You're a menace and a mess." He snaps, dark eyes rolling at the dorky grin I have on my face.

Wiggling my eyebrows at him I decide to do what Jem has been telling me, and make subtle moves. "Menaces and messes must be what you like." I can't help but to giggle directly after saying this, but I know it must have worked to some degree because Micah is helping me stand without me asking.

Though, he does shake off like a dog and splash me with water.

Silently, we begin the walk back up, moving a lot quicker than we were when we're with the group because I think we both know Roby and Jem would make them wait for us.

"You know," I begin, feeling pretty thankful I run as much as I do otherwise I'd be out of breath already. "This was your fault."

Micah scoffs, "I'm pretty sure you're the one that tripped AJ, and I have nothing to do with how poorly you can control yourself."

Gasping, I poke him in the side -reminding myself not to get distracted by his muscles. "Yes you do! How do you expect me to stay in perfect control of all this weirdness if you just randomly kiss me? That's like setting something on fire, so the thing next to it gets warm and when you pick it up you're like 'ouch, why is this thing all hot it's not like I set it on fire' but you-"

"I don't sound like that." He interrupts, but looks rather amused by how awful and deep I made my voice go so I ignore it.

"-are forgetting that fire is warm. So you very much do affect how I control myself, but I think you know that." My reply is one smug smirk, making me pout at him. "Demon! You can't just mess with me on purpose like that."

"Come on, you little Goddess," Micah only grins at me, ruffling my hair. "We both know that you enjoy this as much as I do. Just wait until you realize how much you fuck with my self control."

He keeps walking but I freeze, before running up the next six stairs to get back in step with him. "Does that mean I can make you do all the stuff you do to me? I want to see you blush! What do I do that makes you -why is your face like that?"

At my words I only get a scowl.

I completely understand why, since that question clearly didn't come out right but I don't like how the conversation ends because we get to the top again.

This time when we get to where our group, who did wait for us, is on the tube, Micah doesn't take any changes and holds onto my waist as I climb in.

"Just in case." The green eyed boy explains while situating himself, making Keagan smirk and give me that one look that people have that makes the stupid feeling slam into my stomach.

"I find your lack of faith disturbing." Jem quotes, making Roby clap excitedly. "She could do it herself, she just needed a few more tries."

"Do or do not, there is no try." Robin quotes in reply, blue eyes sparkling with joy at being able to have this verbal connection with someone. "Jeremiah, you are now my favorite human."

Jeremiah chuckles, "Back at you."

I think me, Keagan and Nell all look the equal amounts of offended but by the time our best friends can defend themselves our tube is already being pushed into the giant slide.

It's not a shock to me that I fall out again, but Roby falls out the most and since Micah already lost once by my tripping into him it's actually Penelope that wins and doesn't get wet at all during all the times we go through the ride.

Keagan only fell out once, and that was because the nerd pushed him in while acting like she wanted a kiss.

This is the kind of people I want to be surrounded by.

It makes me wonder why I ever accepted less than, why I ever let people who didn't truly care about me be such a big part of the way I live...it doesn't make sense.

Being surrounded by selfish people, by addicts, drunks and abusive manipulative people and not doing something about it is one of the worst things a person can let happen to themselves. You should only accept the behavior that makes you feel good, you shouldn't allow people to treat you bad or do things to you you don't want done.

There's no excuse that you can give yourself for no loving yourself because there's no reason to not love yourself.

Self love, without overcompensating with a twisted self-worth and unwarranted confidence for everyone would make the world a better place.

Hundreds of companies that promote females changing themselves, places that preform plastic surgery for cosmetic instead of medical would go broke and people wouldn't get away with bringing hate into other's lives.

Being violent would be taboo.

And I think that would be wonderful, and I think it's weird that the world isn't like that already.

Then again, the school system we have right now can't even teach us how to do our taxes so how could they ever teach us how to truly love ourselves?