CHAPTER FIFTY: DEVIL

Addicts are devils, made by holy substances and shamed by angels.
-Marie Steele

There's rarely been times in my life that I've felt this small.

It's like I'm at a party and the guest of honor is anxiety with it's pulse one, insecurity.

When that blue eyed girl told me her mother was the best lawyer money could buy I honestly didn't take here seriously. I thought she was just pumping up her mother's image and practice.

Diabla is all she told me to call her.

Not the daughter of Emmeline fucking Carter.

In other words one of the top practicing lawyers in the country, the woman is helping to end human trafficking, the one whose been on over eighty high profile rape cases and won all of them and has gotten many kidnappers and abusers life sentences in prison without costing the poor victim a cent.

Topping it all off, her background isn't a good one.

She knows what it's like.

She understands.

And she's winning at life -she got out, got love, a family, a successful career.

The least intimidating thing about this woman that I found- -or rather, Jem found when geeking out over his research on her- -is that she has a dog.

But even the dog is half wolf, so there goes my dream of ever not being a anxious, stammering mess around the woman.

Being outside her law firm and looking up at the giant, pristine building is one thing but standing outside her two story home and staring at the front door is another. Her private, most important to her clientele are ever allowed inside. I have no idea why I'm apart of that.

It's kinda scary to me.

Her house is painted grey with a huge yard and from what I saw, a even larger backyard with a pond. It's super fancy but also very homey, you can tell it's loved and taken care of. The driveway itself is a quarter mile long, remind me of Grey Estate enough that my nerves were able to calm down.

Jem drove me here since Micah wanted to sleep in and he already left once I made sure it was the right house, so I couldn't chicken out even if I wanted to. And I want to.

I can hear people talking from the back of the house and really hope I'm not disturbing any guests by me being here.

Mrs. Carter- -who told me to call her Emmeline but it feels illegal, like calling your teacher by their first name- -told me to come by anytime this week after six in the morning and before eleven at night. She told me not to call in advance because her secretary doesn't monitor her most important clients.

Apparently, her secretary is her own husband.

I found that adorable.

Then again, from what Diabla said, her father is the Devil and I'm not necessarily excited to be around yet another intimidating man that I don't know.

This is for yourself AJ, it's for yourself and it's not selfish.

It takes me another five minutes of contemplation to ring the doorbell, my shaky hands making it sound like I set it off twice.

The door opens rather suddenly and the guy behind it scowls- -him being a red-head around Jem's height with green eyes just a little lighter than Micah's- -before opening the door wider. "Please don't tell me you're another one of her cousins, you all are annoying as hell."

My cheeks flame up red and I don't move to step inside, "I'm not um, I'm not, well, I don't know whose cousin. I-I don't have any cousins. Uh, I'm uh, are you Emmeline Carter's son or...?"

Taken a little aback the ginger nods, "Adopted. Who are you then?"

"She's one her clients, Son." A deep voice says, making both our heads snapping up to the male. He's just a little taller than Jem, the same electric too-blue eyes as Diabla with the same fang-like teeth showing through his small grin. "Let her in."

The redhead just shrugs and goes back to whatever he was doing before.

"Your son has teenage loner syndrome." I joke nervously. "I um...this isn't like, a bad time o-or something, right?"

"Not at all," He stays professional but his eyes are smiling at me. "My name is Xavier Wolf, feel free just to call me Wolf."

"Mrs Carter didn't take your last name?"

"At the time she said that she still had too many dog jokes to make before either of us could change our last names. It's a little too late at this point to do anything differently."

I can't help but to giggle to myself, grateful that this prestigious lawyer's husband is as comfortably casual as he is. Given, he is still quite intimidating.

Him being a little shorter than my Demon but still taller than Jem puts him in a comfortable height for me, the only thing unnerving about him is his blue eyes. She had blue eyes, but not like his. In a way, it's nice.

Nearly tripping over myself, I correct my stance and manners in one go. "Oh! I forgot, I'm sorry. My name is AJ Ferro, I'm happy to meet you. Sorry it's under these circumstances."

"I guess you took my  tiny offer to help a little too seriously," A snarky voice says from beside me, to where I hadn't noticed Diabla come in. "This about that dick you had dinner with that day? Mom's the best when it comes to dealing with abuse cases after all. Is he the one that did all that fuck-shit to your ankle?"

This girl always has an air of confidence- -something that brings anxiety- -about her.

At the mention of this, my cheeks burn red with embarrassment and my hands fly up to clutch my shirt. "Actually , um...this wasn't from him. And I'm not looking to get away from my parents or compensation from it all either. I just want, er...legal rights to my b-business. I guess."

Though Micah says- -and it's half in jest but his anger is completely real- -that we should sue him and seek the death penalty. Jem himself wants both my parents to get jail time.

I don't know how I feel about this.

Growing up, it felt as if you could bottle up all the bad things in my life- -the bad feelings, the tragedy, the abuse- -and ship it away. Except the mail service happens to be drugs.

And I can't exactly blame my parents for all of my actions -and they've gotten better.

"Oh, that sounds boring." The girl says, turning away. "Hopefully the trail will be a little fucking interesting."

My eyes widen, "Trail?"

Wolf turns towards me, "We can try to resolve this as a sit down contract type meeting with your parents and their lawyers if you'd be more comfortable outside of the courtroom."

Agreeing to that, I'm led  outside and am completely nerve-racked as I'm introduced to his wife.

Why isn't the six-foot something grown man intimidating to me but the inch-short than m middle aged gentle woman is?

I'm messed up in the head.

Fuck.

"So...why did you choose me to represent you?" Mrs. Carter asks me.

"Because you do a lot of free work for women and children in bad places who can't afford a good lawyer. And you help small businesses stay out of danger from business tycoons. A lot of lawyers don't care who they represent as long as they're uh, payed well...I guess. You're a good person. That's why I'm talking to you," I tell her. "From everything I've heard about you um, which, until recently I guess wasn't a lot...b-but I noticed that you're good at your job! And you, you can separate your observations from your, um, your preconceptions. If that makes any sense. You see what is, not um, not what you want to see. Am I making sense?"

Mrs Carter smiles at me. "You are making sense and thank you. You seem like a lovely person for me to interact with. Now, describe the situation exactly?"

Sitting down, I dive right into the details and what I want -including the profits of the last two years I've been working at Grey Estate split fifty fifty with me. That's all the compensation to mental, verbal, physical and neglectful abuse for me -plus I already have a quarter of the profit.

I can't quite describe how talking about my parents makes me feel, but it's not right. It's uncomfortable. And it's always leaves me feeling cold.

"All I want is to be happy and safe. To do that I can't be involved with my parents anymore like this. They're so draining. And to me, they're dangerous."

My lower lip trembles.

"I've tried to deal with the real world and be serious all the time, it wasn't for me."

"Someone is smoking on the porch," Diabla, or Eliza as her father called her, says to her father, who looks at his front door with a glare. "Can I let Luci scare him?"

"Please don't!" I blurt out. "That's my boyfriend."

Wow, that feels really good to say out loud.

"Your boyfriend smokes? But your-" Mrs Carter clears her throat before trying again. "You have burns that are usually associated with cigarettes."

Of course today is the day I wore an under the collar type shirt. I totally forgot about my scars.

I don't know why they're acting like I should be afraid of Micah. Growing up in an abusive household made him hesitant of initiating contact, even if it's just holding hands, and expressing love. Lots of people like us share this fear...because what if one day we get mad and suddenly our touch isn't so gentle? 

It's hard to live with yourself when you hurt someone you love, and Micah will never cross that boundary. 

But I know first hand that the past is hard to shake, our abusers often stay in the back of our minds. Maybe not as a hard hand or their face, but sometimes they show up as the little voice in your head that tells you you're not good enough and asks you to destroy everything.

Some people get messed up and rebel and become things others don't want to be because they didn't want to be like their parents, but me and Micah are turning into better people because we will never be our parents.

"Yeah, I know?" I smile uneasily, really just wanting to run into Micah's arms after such a long day. "Do you guys have something against smokers that doesn't have to do with cancer...?"

Diabla- -or Eliza, haven't found out what I'm supposed to call her still- -looks at the door just like Wolf. "Can I meet him?"

"Uh..." I follow their gaze and slowly nod. "Sure? He hates most people, just so you're aware. He's coming from school, so he's probably not in the best mood."

"Thank you for coming!" Mrs Carter calls over her shoulder, still writing things down.

"Thank you for having me!" Shouting this back, I stumble outside trying to keep up with the two Wolf's and far enough ahead of the half-wolf now barking that I'm not trampled. "Your dog is -mph!"

Because of the large awkward boot on my ankle, the second I stumble just a little too much my balance is shot and I tip forward. With a heavy 'oof' the green eyed boy catches me against his chest, using only his broken arm to do so.

"Right, of course," I huff out, staring up at him and the cigarette still in his good hand. "I see your priorities."

The broken boy rolls his eyes, "You're luck I even caught you."

Rolling my eyes, I wrap my arms around him in a hug. "I missed you."

A small wicked smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth, "I bet you did." Pausing he glances to the two blue-eyed Wolf's just staring at him. "Who the fuck are they?"

"Be nice!" Slapping his chest, I pout up at Micah. "They're the ones helping me. Their mom and wife is my lawyer, oh! And this is their doggy, Luci."

Patting my thigh, I call the half-wolf to me -making his tail wag quickly as he comes up to start licking my hand. 

Liking animals, Micah crouches down and starts to pet Luci who almost instantly rolls over so the Demon can scratch his belly. "Good dog." He coos.

I can't help but to stare at him, probably smiling like an idiot.

Then I notice the way Diabla- -Eliza- -let us, and Wolf has relaxed leaning against his front porch. Waving to him, I send him a small smile too. "Thanks for the doggy time...and helping me, I really appreciate it."

Wolf just nods, watching as Micah silently pulls me away -scowling as he noticed that there was another human around yet again.

"You're pretty cute when you're interacting with an animal, but you hate other people so much. It's adorably funny."

"It's not gonna be funny when you have to help me hide a body.

"Babe, I am way too emotionally opened and sleep deprived right now to stop you from murdering someone so," I clap my hands and grin at him, making him glare at me. "That means you have to smile and at most, merely hospitalize someone. Unless they're Jem. You can kill Jem."

The backseat's door swings open violently, showing my best friend's mad face.

Oops.

"Jemmy," I sing, trying to get out of this. "I would die for you."

Knowing exactly what I'm doing, Jem's hazel eyes narrow at me. "You will." This is a statement, almost like he'll kill me himself.

I gulp.