Three years ago he left me on the day we were supposed to get married and went to Mumbai to fulfil his dream of becoming a singer.

And,

It had been two years since my husband is with me.

I don't love him and he knows that.

He knows that whenever I sit on the scooty behind him, I write his name on his back.

He knows that I always paint his pictures when his thoughts don't let me sleep at night.

He knows that every year I go to Gurudwara on his birthday.

He knows that I never correct somebody, when they refer to him as my husband.

He knows that, I still wear his black shirt to feel his presence around me.

He knows that I never tie my hair, as he liked it when my hair would cascade down my back.

He knows that half of my wardrobe is filled with clothes of red color as he liked red colour.

He knows that I love tea but still I made a habit to have a cup of coffee once in a day as he used to like coffee.

He knows that while having lunch, I listen to the songs sung by him.

He knows that I always order ice-cream of butter scotch flavor, as it reminds me of him.

He knows that I still have a picture of him in my purse.

He knows that I never remove the earrings gifted by him on my birthday.

He knows that I still wear his engagement ring.

He knows that I still write his name on my mehendi.

He knows that the anklet I wear everyday was given by him after our first year of togetherness.

He knows that even though I sleep beside him, I dream of him.

He knows everything, and still he says that he loves me.

When I asks him what does he want from me, he always says the same thing. 'Just stay by my side.'

He accepted me with him.

He told me that I can write his name on his back as his back was mine.

He told me that I can paint him as long as he is the one who is buying me painting easles.

He told me that I can go to Gurudwara every year on his birthday, as long as I have langar with him.

He told me that as long as I know with whom I am spending all my day with, he has no problem even if I don't correct anybody when they refer to him as my husband.

He told me that I can wear his black shirt, as long as he is the one I hug tightly, while crying for him.

He told me that I do not have to tie my hair as long as I know that he is the one who caress my hair till I fall asleep.

He told me that, it's okay if my wardrobe is filled with red dresses as long as I know that the pink lipstick which he gifted me on my birthday looks beautiful on my lips.

He told me that, I can have coffee once in a day, as long I fulfil the promise of having the morning tea with him.

He told me that I can listen to his songs while having lunch, as long as I fulfil the promise of having dinner with him.

He told me that it is okay to have his favorite ice-cream as long as he is the one wiping the ice-cream smeared on the corner of my lips.

He told me that, I can have his photo in my purse, as long as he is with me in my future.

He told me that I can wear the earrings given by him , as long as I am wearing the bangles given by his mom.

He told me that I can wear his engagement ring as long as he is the one putting nail paint on my fingers.

He told me that I can write his name on my mehendi as long as he is the one who is holding my hands while crossing the street.

He told me that I can wear the anklet given by him as long as he is the one buying sandals for me.

He told me that I can dream about him, as long as he is the one I am waking up with every morning.

He accepted me with him.

*****

It had been a year since I am staying with him.

The more I am staying with him, the more I am falling in love with him.

Love.

Just four alphabets, but it had the power to ruin a person and mend a person.

His love ruined me.

But,

His love mend me.

I dont know the exact day when I fell for him.

Was it when he ate the kheer just because I pleaded him to have it, even though he doesn't like to eat any sweet dishes?

Or,

Was it when he painted his own fingers with red nail paint, just to make me laugh when I started crying due to stomach pain during my period?

Or,

Was it when he scolded his brother when he made fun of my poor cooking skills?

I dont know the exact time I fell for him.

Was it at 2 a.m. in the night when I had a high fever and the whole night he was putting damp handkerchief over my forehead to lower my body temperature?

Or,

Was it at 2 p.m. in the afternoon when I heard the song he released and when I realized that it was the same song which he wrote while laying his head on my lap, all the memories came back and I started crying and in that weak moment when I called him, he left all his work and ran home to me.

I don't know the exact season I fell for him.

Was it the summer season when he bought air conditioner for me even though he gets a headache whenever it is on?

Or,

Was it the rainy season when he held his coat over my head to sheild me from rain even though he had totally drenched in rain?

Or,

Was it the early morning of the winter season when he left for work without waking me up, so that I can cuddle in the blanket till late in the morning?

I dont know the exact place I fell in love with him.

Was it in our living room when he kept the channel of English songs on, even though his favourite news telecast was on air?

Or,

Was it in our kitchen, when he taught me how to make butterscotch cake even though his favourite flavour was chocolate?

Or,

Was it in our bedroom when he massaged my head with hot oil when I told him that my head is paining a lot.

Or,

Was it in our washroom where he washed my hair on a Sunday afternoon, when my hand got fractured for two weeks?

I dont know anything, except one thing and that is that I love him.

For the first time, I am glad that I didn't end up with him, otherwise I would have not met him.

For the first time I am glad that he left me, and destiny led me to him.

For the first time I am scared of him leaving me, as when he left, my heart shattered into pieces, but if he leaves, my soul will be shattered into pieces.

For the first time, I am not scared of being owned by a person.

As I know that even though he will own me, he will always let me be free.

For the first time, I am not afraid of being with someone as I know that he will always gives me my own space.

For the first time, I am afraid of loosing someone, because I know that if I will loose him, my whole world will crumble down.

Today, I decided to confess my feelings for him and that too on our wedding anniversary.

Till now he had done so many things for me and that's why today I want to do something for him.

So today, I wore a pink dress which reached upto my knees. I looked in the mirror and a smile formed on my lips looking myself in his favourite colour, pink.

Then, I wore the earrings he bought for me when my painting was put in the art gallery for the first time.

I removed the anklet given by him and even removed his engagement ring and and wore his engagement ring.

And, I completed my look by wearing the pink lipstick he likes and bangles of his mom in both of my hands as I know how much he likes it whenever I wear these bangles.

With my hair tied in a braid just like he likes, I went towards the refrigerator and took out the chocolate cake I made for him and even cooked his favourite, Paneer Lababdar with Fried Rice which I hope will be half tasty as the delicious food he cooks.

Should I confess my feelings as soon as he enters the room?

I don't even know if I will be able to say it to him.

I love you.

Three words, eight alphabets.

I dont know if I will be able to put everything I am feeling right now, into these three words with eight alphabets.

I dont think these three words with eight alphabets will give justice to my feelings but still, I decided to say it as on the other hand, I think it is easy and safe to say these three words with eight alphabets instead of everything I am feeling right now.

Till now he had bought  many things for me, so today I decided to give him a photo frame.

I sat on the sofa and took out the photo frame from the bag. I looked at the photo and a smile escaped my lips.

In this photo, he was laughing so wholeheartedly with his mom and I am glad that his brother captured this beautiful moment.

I hope there will be a big smile on his face when he looks at this photo frame.

I looked at the time and realized that he will be here anytime soon so I kept the frame inside the bag and took the cake in our bedroom and placed it on the table and put off the air conditioner.

I looked around the bedroom and hoped that my efforts of lightning our bedroom with candles and the rose petals scattered on our bed will show him the feelings which I will be too shy to convey and that is,

Today I want to give myself to him.

My heart.

My soul.

And,

My body.

Giving it to the man, who accepted me with him.

*****

The end.

I hope you liked this one shot?

How are you feeling after reading this one shot?

Thanks to smiling_slut for the beautiful cover.

Please VOTE if you liked her.

And, COMMENT if you liked him.

And VOTE and COMMENT if you liked them.

*****