━━━━━▼━━━━━

Waking up, I had a smile plastered onto my face. It was a memory, such a clean and vivid memory that I couldn't even begin to comprehend as to why I thought of it now. Daryl's arms were roughly caging me into a small second of his side, planting me and not allowing me any wiggle room.

But I need to get up. It's late.

Sliding down and up did I manage, but not without some bit of difficulty and him moaning in his sleep with a bit of movement. So with the said freedom, I took myself to the bathroom. Brushing my teeth, even adding the pleasure of putting some cream that Maggie thought I'd like.

However, when I placed it back into the mirror cabinet before me. I jumped at the sight of Daryl standing behind me. It was a quick jolt of an inhale, until I continued to rub the product all around. Especially my neck.

"Hell ya doin'?" He looks amused to say the least. 

"Trying to feel normal." I smiled back, looking to mirror to make sure it was all in my skin. However he found his way to breath me in, his arms pulling me in closer to his hold as I was once again pinned to his scent.

"Ya smellin' good." He growled, and my hand just gently serviced his head so I could plant a small kiss onto his lips.

Which in turn, earned me another territorial grunt. "You hungry?" His forehead tipped off towards mine as his smile curled up. 

"Those pancakes ya made for Addie yesterday were lookin' pretty good." He hummed, and I agreed. Giving him the privacy of the bathroom did start cooking.

Back in the day, I would've hated it. But then it was a struggle for time and balancing was always an issue. Now?...Now it's easier to waste time, nothing to do. Well on my end at that. 


I've been tasked to staying at home while everyone else is going to be dealing with a cavern infested with hundreds. "Ya know...Still can jump on if ya wanna." I turn back to see him coming down the hallway. He's not at all dressed. Just in sweat pants I had found in the dresser that he's claimed.

"So many people are going...Did you talk to Rick? About looking for people?" He hummed, rubbing his chin as he sat before me. He wasn't smiling anymore, just concentrating.

"He ain't listenin'. His call." I frowned for him, so I tilted my head. 

"You want me to talk to him?" He shrugged, so it was just the honest opinion of my own. But here I am, standing here before him. Telling him that I don't want to go, rather than Rick telling me to stay here. He doesn't fully trust those here, and if something were to happen. The only backup being Carol wouldn't be that big.

So here I am. Cooking breakfast.


"What ya doin' today? Instead of goin' out?" I chuckled, seeing his actual interest. So I scrunched my nose up and plated his three pancakes before going to refill his coffee. 

"I'm going to the pantry with Carol...I was thinking we do pasta when you get back." His eyes lit up.

Think I found Daryl Dixon's weakness. And that was pasta with tomato sauce. His little side smirk that hasn't shown in a good god while came about as he stuffed his mouth full of syrup.

Hearing the quick given jolts of steps did I smile to see my daughter as I gave her a share of the pancakes as well. "Can I have some coffee mom?" I felt Daryl's eyes on me, waiting for a replay and I just held my tongue hostage as I shook my head. 
"Why?" 

"Because you are waking up fine on your own and don't need coffee," I spoke, softly at that as I took a sip of my own.

And to taught her even further, so did Daryl. "Ain't doin' ya no favors kid. Tastes like shit anyhow." He grumbled, but still managed to sip it down. "Then why do you guys drink it?"

"Cause we gotta long day...Ya think Carl's up? Bet he'd wanna see ya." He teased, and that had my daughter go silent within the second. Stuffing her face with food as she glared at him every other minute.

Until she left to go back upstairs. 
"I think her and Carl are datin'." The coffee in my mouth completely came forward into the sink as I continued to cough. Shooing away his help did I start laughing as I breathed out. 

"You're supposed to be on my side." Slapping his arm did he slowly let out a chuckle as he was completely taken back.

"Figured it out yesterday...Saw 'em holdin' hands." I huffed as that came to mind. So instead of asking for any further information, I leaned in closer to him. My hands intertwining into the locks of his hair to pull him closer for a forehead kiss.

"You be careful out there. Alright?" He nods, but I still feel the tug on my heart as I feel complex about it.

Seeing a figure at the door, did I back up a small bit so I wasn't shouting directly into Pookie's ear. Already telling Rick that he could come in.

"Hey...You two are up early." Daryl admits a growl as he pulls himself into my stomach. Almost like he was territorial as I let him have one last kiss. "Big day today...Gotta feed him."

Seeing Rick this uncomfortable as I was almost petting Dixon as he was in my hold. 

"Gotta get dressed." As Daryl dismissed himself, he nodded to Grimes. And I know for a fact it's a bit rocky considering he took away Daryl's job for Alexandra. 

"Don't think I've ever seen him that calm." My eyes widen as I knew what he was insinuating. So with that, I took Judith from his hold as I was deemed to babysit the kids. She's coming shopping with me, something I haven't done in a long ass time. 

Especially with a baby.

"How many people you taking today?" 

"Bout fifteen...Carl's planning on coming over too." I nod in permission as it feels so odd to be the women of the house as he's still our leader.

"You okay with watching her today?... I didn't...Wanna ask Jessi." I waved it off as it being easy, already having a booster seat in the house as well. Did I sit her there and begin clearing the table.

"Do you want something to eat?" He waves his hands towards me, but as I point to the coffee machine. And groans. "When's the last time you had coffee?" I tested, and he hums into the rim of the mug.

"When you two moved out, I stopped drinking it." Rolling my eyes did I start washing the dishes, something that I once again. Found calming. But what was even more concerning, was Rick coming beside me to dry them off.

"He doing okay?" I nod, smiling even as I wanted to make it seem alright. And not be the type of girlfriend or fiancee to gesture out to problems that he's trying to solve.

But just a small push from me to Rick could solve the issue.

Maybe when they come back.

"He wants me to come...Which is surprising considering he didn't want me to go on runs back when—" I trailed off as I couldn't finish the sentence. It's been rough, the people the town has lost so far. It hurts.

And I feel out, especially to Jessi and the boys.

Everyone soon went off, the official line of cars was set out. Lead by Daryl on his bike to the cavern that potentially contained the entire offense team. Leaving Carl and I to go towards the storage room to shop.

"You think the kids will burn down the house?" I chuckled at Carol's attempt to lighten the mood, because after the men and other rode off. My heart sunk, not really uprising any conversation.

"Don't think they'll touch it, not like they know how to work it anyway." 

"Or cook for that matter." She cooed to the baby, who babbled the entire time on our way to said house.

It wasn't crowded, but there were the given few stragglers to get their stock for the week. So as I hung back for a second to service it. Did I think back to the number of people here, and how many cans are listed.

Because I feel the impending dread of this not being enough, that's how my mind operates now. Always being scared of when the next meal is. 

"What's wrong?" Carol asks, and as I give myself the moment of clarity to think of an excuse. As I tug at Judith's slapping hand to my chin did I smile it off. 

"I can't even remember their names," I whispered, but she played it off as a joke as she walked right on in.

Happy and caroling as ever. 
Standing beside her did I know the limit, I also know that I promised Daryl for pasta. But what might be even more filling, would be lasagna. With the deer meat still frozen in our fridge. I smiled at the idea. The mixture of his favorites would be perfect.

"Celery soup...It's been here since the start. You're very brave." Sharing my glance towards Carol did I just roll my eyes. We've eaten worse. Honestly. So I smiled in offering to the girl across from me, eyeing every little thing I'm doing.

Or Judith.

Because she's the attention grabber now a days.

"Well, I'm hoping the paprika will mask the soups...Celeryness." She concluded, but then the girl across from us just started to shake her head and judge the cans before her to place it back. 

"But then you'd be stuck with something that tastes like paprika...No thank you." Gritting my teeth at the thought of housewives gossip did I realize I'm categorized once again.

Shit.

So I removed myself as I let out another blow out of a huff and brought Judith closer to my hold. Bouncing her a bit as she needed a bit of a boost. But my smile abrupt widely as I needed to calm my own nerves.

"I just figured since we're running low on staples, I'd try to use a few things nobody seems to want..." She soon started with her large pitch, talking about her husband in such a nice way that it made my blood boil as she played the lie so flawlessly.

It's tearing wounds, old wounds of my childhood to see her speak of such times.

"Talk about miracles, that recipe for cola canned ham. Hmm. Ms. Peletier, you are an honest to goodness hero." She took the compliment to heart, literally, her hand tapped onto her chest with the kindly sweet shine of her teeth. 


"Can't take all of the credit, Blake made a stew a few days ago..." Although I felt eyes on me, I just ignored it. The fresh meat is the trick, and I already had Olivia asking for a boar like it's common.

"If only my husband was putting food on the table...Sounds too literal." I wanted to laugh, laugh at the stupidity. That these wives can't find anything more. 

But then something else hit me...

Daryl's not my husband...Yet. Or he is kind of. Fuck. I can't deal with this at all.

But then the groan came about, and it stopped me dead in my tracks. "Something wrong?" I asked, placing the pack of pasta into the shared basket that Carol's holding onto. She nicked her head towards it in service to needing it.

"It's...It's just those old noodles. I mean, I tell you, if someone would just find me one of those machines, I swear we would all be eating like we were on a tour of Tuscany." I had to pull Judith closer to my neck, the level of insanity this women is speaking of just screams that she was privileged back in the real world as well. To complain about packaged pasta in general is too much and I cannot stand it.

So I tilted my head, swaying my hips as I held the baby closer.

"You know, I could teach you how to make pasta with your own two hands...Just...No smoking in the house, even my husband knows that one." I teased, smiling my way out of the entire building. Carol was right behind, her smile so wide that I couldn't hold it in either. Laughing along as we hurried back to our houses. 

"God...I can't believe those people are complaining about pasta." I groaned at the idea of it, even thinking about how I would've raised Addie in the idea of food being food.

Sighing, I could see the anger in Carol's eyes as well.

"They haven't had a time of depression yet Blake...Give them time." 

"Time isn't what they need, it's a dose of reality," I argued back. But then it took her a second glance as she wanted to know more.

Yet she didn't speak.

"I lived in a foster home for most of my life...Learn to live with the lack of love. Or food." I whispered as I stopped at my house, she came in too. Allowing me the moment to grab which food from the stack that I had sorted out.

"Daryl's a lucky man." I gave out a gentle smile. Shaking my head. "Think I'm the lucky one...That we have a second chance." Now the relation she gave out now, that was seemingly real. And only people without our group have seen such a thing. Her real happiness.

"Do you need any help?" I shook my head, thanking her for coming with me. Don't think I can smooth talk my way through housewives anymore than I can look at them. So with Judith still babbling away did I place a small little baby spoon before her, as well as some apple sauce.

But my eyes wondered a small bit, are the kids home?


"Addie? Carl?" I called out, and it was my daughter who came here. "What's up?" Shaking my head did I explain that I just wanted to know if they were home. 

"Do you wanna play uno? Carl found a deck." I waved her off, telling her that I'm going to start cooking the food.

Honestly, I think I just wanted to pride myself in pretending that Daryl's coming home from the bike shop in a few hours like my dream wanted me to believe. Or I want to keep busy. 

Keep my hands busy.

While those who were working on the plan to get the walkers to another section of the city, I went on a run. Found a load of seeds that Maggie was wanting to get for the longest time ever since she found a yellow pages book with listings of places nearby.

To be honest, I haven't been on run with her since Merle picked us up back in Woodbury. That's how long it had been, and I don't think we've ever gone solo before. And here we are, scoring something that Hershel would've been proud of.

And I smiled to myself as I threw in the pasta. Remember the little connection Maggie had made. I saved Hershel by removing the bitten limb. But he saved me from the illness, just before he met his own fate that is.

A knock at the door silenced my thoughts as I peered up. "Come in!" I shouted off. And in came both Eugene and Tara, and she looked mildly beaten by the sun. Grabbing a glass from the cabinet and running the cold water did I come over to her to tell her to drink it.

"We were working outside ma'am and—" 

"Think I'm just overworked. I'm fine." She interrupted his analysis on what happened, so I felt onto her head. "Does your head hurt?" She nodded, still managing to drink the water I offered.

"Which side?" As she held her head to her temples, I just smiled. "Let's go see if the infirmary has anything." Her smile widened as she thanked me. But as of late I just needed to cover up all the food so nothing would take hold of it.

But then I saw little Judith playing in her pin that I set her up in.

"Addie! Carl!...I'm going out, can you watch Judith?" They came running down the stairs to do just that, expect my daughter wanted to know where we were going.

"Tara here needs your mother for medical attention, I promise she'll be back in 0030 hours." I chuckled, but since she grew up with her grandfather being in the military, she stood her ground.

With the two minute walk down the road, did I pay more attention to Tara's ability to walk and respond fluently rather than the conversation at hand. "It hams my biscuit is all. And going by cubic feet, the biggest building in the expansion and we're gonna waste it on a church..." I rolled my eyes as we entered into the infirmary.

Looking through the given few, I didn't want to give her aspirin if it's only going to come back in a half an hour. She needs something more.

"...Take out the benches, that could be a lab, a machine shop, very least a sweet ass game room. Walled-in real estate is at premium here." With my head stuck in the medicine cabinet, did just smile. 

"Maybe it's got a basement...Then we can all share it." I offered out, until I found the bottle I was looking for.

"Hams my biscuits. That's all I heard...I mean, I have no idea what you said after that...I was kidding." I frowned, she looked relatively stressed.

"Are you okay, Dana?" 

"It's Denise...Yeah no, I'm okay." So I came closer to her, leaning against the patient observation table as I don't believe her at all.
"I'm the new doctor now, what's the—" Eugene was quick to question if she was a doctor, but her clap back had me raise a brow. "Are you?"


To be fair, think I'm the only doctor in the room at the moment. And it's not even correct to the practice of— "Sorry, I uh, I heard that story...Listen, I'm a little nervous here. I'm a psychiatrist. I went to med school. I was even gonna be a surgeon, but after the panic attacks, I got really interested in psychology...I think I'm really trying to lower expectations here." I shook my head, waving my hand to try and tell her to take a breath considering she's been rambling for a few minutes already. 

"Can you do this?" 
He sternly questioned, and I shot my head back for the second time. "Eugene, shut up. She can do this." Nodding in agreement gave her the small boost of confidence that he shot her down by.

"Pete didn't want me here. But I'm here now and I only kind of want to throw up." Fixing my position on the bed did I think for a minute. I wasn't told by anyone that we found a replacement doctor for the infirmary, nor did it look like either of them knew.

Except for Tara, considering she knew the basis of her name.

She doesn't look as qualified as anyone would probably like, but I'm a psychologist as well. Not a full medical doctor. 
"I can help if things get too much...Think I've sown up enough people to get another degree." I chuckled, and she looked hopeful in that. "Sorry. I kinda just stayed in my apartment when everything was going on...You're—" 

"Blake." I said, holding out my hand.

But her eyes continued to look towards me as I couldn't understand what she was—
"Blake...Holden?" I nodded, but the grip she had on my hand became stronger as she pulled herself up in the process. 

"I-I...You came to my school and spoke...And this is going to sound cheesy, but I actually preordered your book." My mouth ran dry as I don't recall her.

But the fact that she reminded me of my book in progress had me flinch. Maybe my dream was reminding me. "Was only half done when this happened..." I mumbled, realizing how many nights and notes I suffered through to get the given chapters of research all into a condensed form. 

"How about you give Tara a check up...Don't think aspirin would do the trick, what would you give her?" I questioned, hiding the boxes' name as I offered out the experimentation to her. While Eugene explained once again what had happened to Tara as they were working outside.

"You're my first patient. And with that symptom, I'm pretty sure I can't kill you." I tilted my head and watched as she examined her, and for the most part. She did everything right, even named the medication in my hand.

So with that being said, I preceded to go on home. Almost feeling relieved that someone else has the position of doctor instead of myself. At least she went to a proper medical school and has training in that. Otherwise we're on the same basis.

However, the idea of my book...Made me hesitant in going on the stairs to my house. I talked about a lot of things in my life, what made me pursue research, why I don't have a husband but a child. Or why I continue to return to King's county.

The interviews in school all suggested that I follow the basic ideals of a women or continue with my career. So that's why I had the plans of writing a book, which haunts me into thinking...Didn't I write something about Daryl?

Or is that just a figment of my imagination?

Taking the few strides up the stairs and into the house, did I hear the laughter going on upstairs to where the kids were entertaining the baby. And rather than disturbing them, I found myself following the recipe that's been sown into my head for so many years.

And with the last bit of pasta over the layers, I finally wrapped it in tinfoil to put into the fridge. When he comes home, I'll put it in. Not knowing when they'll be back is what's worrying me.

Another reason why I was so quick into going to the infirmary, because I knew this wouldn't take as long as I would've thought.

Capping off some of the ingredients and placing the leftovers away, did I peek through my window to see the women from the stock room today. The one I scolded for smoking inside, well...Now she's outside, in her lawn. Almost doing it in spite or to prove a point that she can follow what my husband does.

But watching her the way I am, I felt almost dramatic that I'm staring for so long. Like gaining the feed. So just as I was about to walk away, her screaming to something to left of her.

And if by chance, it was just some kids around the neighborhood. But the second it came into view, I backed up. A large man hacking his machete to the skull of the fallen women had me step out of view. But not without locking this door, and the door to the side of it.

The soon sound of screaming plowed through as I went to each and every door, now with my pistol lowered to the ground. Until finally, I came to the bottom of the stairs. "I saw them from upstairs...They're coming in from all over." Addie exclaimed, packing a large assault rifle in her hands.

"Where the hell did you get that from?" I questioned, standing there gawking at it. 

"D-Daryl...Before he—He left he—" I cut her off, looking to both of the children as I needed to think of what to do.
"You have to stay here and keep Judith safe. Both of you. Stay here." They both nodded and I was left with a quick grab of my jacket as I threw over the hood. This was it.

Hiding behind the massive amount of shrubbery did I pin myself closer to the ground as I knew what I needed to do, there are far too many of them. Just a few yards away from the house did I find a growing mass of a dozen, maybe more.

But none of them have guns. They're all carrying knives or spears. Handmade or found, but deadly they as they. They are killing us.

The screams were easy to find, but not only that, they were taking prisoners. Even stabbing the likes of already dead Alexandrines. Taking limbs of torsos. So rounding about a few more houses to get away from my own, did I find Erin.

Begging for her life, and just as I was about to turn the corner I pinned the man with my elbow clocked against his neck. Stabbing through my knife into the back and again at his temple as he was already finding his way to the floor. Fully limp.

It's been a few days since I've smelled fresh blood this close, this pure. And now, as I sat myself down beside Erin, my hands covering her mouth to stay humbly quiet as I needed her to silence down.

Her wounds were loud, bleeding more than a puddle to the floor beside us both.

There was nothing I could do, even with her living and breathing now. She's still one of the casualties of this attack, and to prevent even more from happening. I need to keep moving.

So as the footsteps rolled past us all on the road behind us, I stuck my knife deep into her skull and let her fall down to the ground. However, in the pit of it. Hold my hand against my mouth to alert the gentle shaking to stop. Did I hear a sudden boost of difference, a car horn?
A honk? What the hell is— 
Shit. Shit. The walkers. The entire herd that my people are tasked in moving away are going to hear this.

So what does it signal to the people inside the wall?


Stepping over Erin's body, did I look to the man who did this. Yanking off his handkerchief and putting it around me the same way he had will define me the same way they are.

But the sick thing is, and what made me knee down further. Is because I saw the W's on his forehead.

So that's what I have to do as well.

Tapping the pooling blood on the floor, enough to draw it my own. Did I hurry along. Ripping up the ground to provide myself with some dirt. To look dirty and unclean as well as splatter both the machete to look like I have killed.

And with that, I could take off running.

Watching everything come down through it all. This town had it's glory, and it's suffering the same fate as the rest. So winding down towards the complexes in the center of town, did I about to swing my pistol on out. "Damn Aphid, gotta lot on ya." One sneered, and I continued to move.

They thought me one of them, a name even.

Bet I can use that to my advantage.

As I was about to go downstairs into one of the rooms to ward off the rest, I saw another too approaching. "Hey, Aphid, where'd you get the gun?" I rose it with one hand as I continued to run towards them.

1.

2.

They fell down beside one another.

Up the given stairs did I find another two. Yet one ducked and covered as they watched their friends take the fall before hand. But I ran out of ammo, making me take the steady lead of going down the stairs to continue running. 
Or to outrun this girl more or less.

So when I turned the corner, the dumbass was not ready to be sliced by my awaiting machete that I had been so kindly granted by whoever my first kill had been.

The women fell flat to the ground with no other noise, and with that. I smiled as this place was now my own for the taking.

Walking into the room littered with guns did I find it empty. Until one man at the door just carefully eyed me in hopes of me being friendly. But I'm not.

Smirking under my cover did I nick my head towards the amount of an armory my people as acquired, and although he too snickered with pride at the score. I simply tugged at his hair and took a long slice up against his throat to bleed him out.

He too, taking the fall.

With my hands now coated in more than five counts of people blood, I dropped the machete. Picking up the same sort of weapon that Daryl decided to plant at home. Good thing he did though, otherwise it'd be another mess of worrying about the kids,

The sudden breathing to my right had me shoot my head into the direction, taking the gentle steps as I wafted my knife higher into my hold, ready to sink it into place. But it was Olivia, crying her eyes out the sight. So I stopped my action then and there.

Yanking down my mask as I shook my head to her, trying to get her calm down.

"It's okay, anyone else down here?" She shook her head, claiming that she's the only one. So instead did I look around, trying to find a bag, so into the hallway did I find a satchel. Pull it up and over my head did I begin to take all the handguns laying out before me. "Come here." I spoke, still grabbing the given dozen. But once I realized she wasn't here. Did I shout to her again.

"You barricade that door behind me once I leave. Do you know how to shoot a gun?" I huffed out, already knowing the god damn awnser as I was ready for a quick lesson.

I might need Addie to come and man the guns.

"Stand here. Finger here. Aim there. One of them comes through that door, you squeeze and you don't stop till they're on the ground." I mustered, and with that I left. Closing the door behind me as I found my place back onto the main road, and just as I made my plan to arm my people. I saw Morgan and Gabriel, tying up one of the men who found their way in.

"We're freeing you. You're trapped. You need to know, people don't belong here anymo—" I can't fucking deal with this, my pistol rose up and I fired before he could finish his god damn sentence.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned out to Morgan, he was suppose to be with the group. "We heard the noise, wanted to make sure the herd doesn't get here..." I nodded, handing both him and Gabrial a pistol from the bag before running down the road. I felt free, considering I'm shielded by most of the monsters in our walls.

My biggest concern is my own people firing at me.

"Blake?" I heard a voice call out, and seeing my friend walking so calmly around did I reach down further into my bag. "Maggie!" I said, offering her another pistol as I continued down the road.

"I need to get someone to guard the armory. Olivia's there now. I need Addie." She nods for me to continue, but I give her an extra one just in case.


Another dash through the houses did I see a two man group sneaking up on the given few looting a house. It wasn't my own, thank god. But close, very close. Raising my pistol to call in defeat whomever was there on ground level with me. Missed the bullet as the intruders was just a few motions about from assassinating from a higher reach.

Except I fired, and his body fell to the ground.

Meeting Arran's eyes and the barrel of his pistol did I throw my hands up, saying his name did he lower it. Offering another two to him and Rosita did I tell them the plan, that they should go to the higher ground and snipe from above.

Or to rally around the houses instead.

We need to keep them contained and have hope that the walkers are distracted with whatever Rick can muster to this. Right now.

Finding my way home did I knock twice at the door, and if I waited another second I would've broken it down. And to see Carl holding my daughter's gun, my mind went into shambles.

"Carl...Carl what's—" He opened the door and ran through for me to follow. Seeing my daughter bleeding, trying to stay conscious as a cut ran deep down one eye. I gulped as I took the cooking cloth I used earlier and handed it to Carl.

The blood on my body was far too much to help her now.

"I—I n-need to get her to the infirmary...You...You stay here." I told him, he nodded. Grabbing hold of her and her body around me did I once again head for the door. Almost missing the steps as I ran into the direction I went in this morning...

"M...mom?" "I'm right here honey, right here." I breathed, heavily. Trying to keep her awake wasn't going to work considering her eyes were lacking any sort of movement.

"Stay with me hun...Stay with me. Come one. We're almost there." I stated, seeing the door opening of both Tara and Eric. And as they saw me incoming, they held the door open while he tried to help me carry my daughter.

"What...What happened?!" My friend shouted, and as I took the free bed and stabilized her towel onto her cheek. I slid off the blood invested coat as well as clean and sterilize my hands.

If the bleeding stops, I need to hurry and close it. She's loosing a lot of blood. And fast. 

"Tara. Do you know how to stick an I.V?" I shouted, and she shook her head. Pointing to the given necessities did she hand them off. "Well you're gonna learn." I stated, hanging up the bag of water high above on the metal pole and moved away the blood from her arm. Only to look to the other contender to see another bleeding fait. Shit...Shit.

Sticking the sliver of an needle into my daughters arm and firmly placing the tape to set it. Did I go to the opposite arm, cutting away the fabric with the scissors to see what the deal actually is. "Hold the rag, Eric...Can you get me new rags. I need to stop the bleeding." I ordered, and I heard his footsteps remove themselves from the room and out.

With her arm now revealed, I looked wide eyed towards Tara. "She must've fought one of them off..." I breathed, closing my eyes to allow the tears to drop explinentally. However, the second Eric snapped back the rags I held it onto her arm. Firmly. Not relieving any pressure.

"It's slowing down..." 

"What's the heart count?" I called out, but Tara didn't know that refers to. "It's stable," Denise said, coming up beside me. 
This wasn't a good time for a lesson or a demonstration for her to take notes on. But her eyes were big with intent, so I allowed her to stay beside me.

"Do we have a walkie in here?" I asked around the room, but more so to Eugene as he was stationed on the far side. Trying not to cry as it would seem.

"Eugene." I sternly spoke, and he began to babble. "Find one," I ordered, and he took running for the hills in order to do so. Yet his arms were almost pinned to both sides of his being. What the hell in the—

"Is she allergic to any sort of painkillers?" I shook my head towards the doctor's question and find myself forgetting the one simple thing. That she's in pain.

She excused herself to find a suitable drug, going to the IV and inserting it within. And while that was done, I looked once more to her arm. Yet it wasn't getting any better.

"Blake, this one looks like it stopped." I smiled, looking to both sides of her face. And with that I traded, having Tara take hold of her arm while I dressed and cleaned the making's of her eyes.
And I felt this relief rush over me when I realized that her eye was fine. Not cut at all, it missed it. Just a line missing it, and perhaps some of her eyebrow parted. But otherwise, it shouldn't be that much of a hassle to keep clean.

Seeing the color of her skin, did I smile in result of finally breaking from the blood infested color. The cut wasn't as deep as her arm, she was lucky. And as Denise prepared the sowing tools, I smiled in thanks as I began to go to work.
Rather that her sleep through it than wake up and rip more skin in the process.

"How's the arm looking?" I asked, but Tara didn't know what to say. So instead, Denise took over in holding it.

As she pressed against the wound once more, the sudden jolt of my daughter's buckling body made me stop let go of the needle. Removing it from the end of the string as she began to bounce around.

"What's happening?!" Tara yelled over the rapid beeping the machine boasted of. Holding my daughter head did I feel how warm she was, trying to calm her body did I tell Tara to hold her steady.

"She's going into hypovolemic shock...She's loosing too much blood." I cried out, hoping for a sign. Anything. Anything at all. "We can give her a sedative! It can—" 

"Do it!" I screamed, and that is when Eric traded places to keep it her in check.

Getting the hair out of my daughters face did I lean down, continuing to cry. "Come on baby, come on. Please...Please..." I begged, seeing paleness intake her body. The sweat. It was all the signs, I just didn't see it until her body reacted the way it is.

"Alright...Alright. Come ne." Denise mumbled under her breath, squeezing the needle so the contents can be let in her bloodstream.

And with that. A full minute, her heart began to settle. Her breathing becoming visibly normal as we all threw a sigh of relief in hand.

"I think this is getting better." Eric offered out, and as I turned to look I smiled. It was. "I can dress it, while you finish the...The other...One." I smiled at her held, taking yet another needle in hand and connecting it to the attached string already embedded into her face.

As time continued, I finished the first half. And jump to the second while Denise was almost done with her arm by the time I came to look.

"How'd you do it?" She questioned, but didn't dare look up from her task. "Do what?" I questioned back, confused as to what she meant. I didn't do anything special. "Stay calm." I huffed, smiling a bit as I shook my head.

"I didn't...But if I broke out of concentration, she would've...She wouldn't have made it." I looked up back to her, my eyes crying so widely as I didn't like an audience, but now it was time to break.

"In the moment, you can't break. You can break later, when everything's safe." I whispered to her, and when she finally snipped the excess string off my daughter's arm. She pointed off into the corner to get something to wrap it on up.

But the second she left, that's when I broke. Just like I thought I would.

My head went down to her waist, balling my eyes out as I realized I could've lost her. She fought off one of the 'w' because I left her alone.

"Blake...Why...don't you get cleaned up, you can use the shower—or head home to." I shook my head, letting out a sob through my teeth as I didn't know what else to say in that moment.

When I looked up, I saw Tara. And she moved beside to let Maggie come in further to the room as she hurried along side me. With her hug offering I began to cry right through there, trying to calm my nerves.

"Tara...Can you get her some clean clothes to change into. Gonna help her clean up a little bit." The girl at the door hurried off and I was forcefully moved up and out of the room as I was now moved into the bathroom.
"She's gonna be alright." She whispered, ending it with a smile. And I let my natural expression darken. 

"She would've been fine if I stayed," I growled, shrugging off the coat and placing it down to the toilet. "Then there would've been more dead ones...We were lucky. This could've been worse Blake." I nodded. But this still doesn't justify my daughter getting hurt.

She left me to get clean up, and I never dreaded to be in the shower as badly as I do now. But I needed to get this done, get all the blood washed out of my body. The vibration in my hand didn't help either, it's been awhile since I've shot my pistol that many times in a row.

Let alone have the anxiety of an attack like his one.

It was orchestrated, thats for sure.

And the 'w', Daryl said something that it stands for wolves. That's what they call themselves, but why target us? The freak I shot dead on the ground said we're trapped.

Letting the water stop being produced above me did I wait until the current stopped flowing through my hair and down to my feet before ringing it out. The towel to the side dried my up enough until I emerged with fresh clothes on my body and damp hair.

Taking the seat beside Addie did I look at the time, and she has yet to wake up.

I felt antsy. Bouncing my entire leg up and down as I bit hard on my nail.

"Rick's here." My eyes sparked up, I must've fallen asleep. And looking to my daughter's vitals did I see that there was no change. Her heart rate is steady, and she still has her color. "The sedative...Knocked her out, she'll be sleeping until tonight if you want to." Covering my mouth with my hand once more did I try and hide myself from reality.

Yet she was still there, ready and awaiting for me to say anything.

"If anything changes...Come get me alright?" And just as I was up and to my feet, Michonne barged through the door with a blood infested Rick in her arms. Denise was quick in offering up a new seat for him to stay at, but holding a new cloth to his ever so bleeding palm did I find myself in the same situation as Addie.

"I...Is C-carl and Judith—" 

"They're fine." I reassured him, but when his eyes landed to the figure in the bed before me. He found himself standing to his feet again. "She's fine...I need to look how you're doing first okay?" Like Maggie had forced me before, I placed him down back onto the seat as I told him to hold down on the rag. Otherwise I was just rubbing all the blood off with disinfectant so nothing will transmit through his other

It was a few cuts that needed stitches, everything else just turned focused to his hand. The gash itself was at large, and the only thing I could do was wrap it firmly. Too wide to be sown back together. We just needed to keep it in check.
"What happened here?" He questioned, raspy as ever. Tired as ever too. "They got in, the 'w's came in with a crowd of them. Started slaughtering, hacking them up." I spoke so neutral that I offered a fake slight of regret as I huffed out, knowing he wasn't buying it.

"How'd—" "I dressed up as one of them, secured the armory. They don't have guns...If that's a plus considering they did that." I eyed back to my daughter as I wiped my eye once again.
"There's a herd outside the fence. The horn brought half of them over." 

"And the other part?" I questioned, but Rick's face fell.

"Daryl...He's with Sasha and Abraham. They're leading them sixty miles out and then come back." I shook my head, raising to my feet only to return back to my daughter's side. Interlocking hands. 
"Come back to what?... This? They can't get in." Taking the brink of my nose for a given moment did I let out a groan. However, the hand onto my shoulder made me jump the slightest bit had it not been so firm. I probably would've shaken him off.

"They're only fifteen miles out. We can fix this by then." 

"And the wall the truck hit, we have to stabilize it...Check if there's any walkers running around that they didn't kill the brain of." I simply replied, and Rick nodded.

But he also encouraged me to come.

"Glenn didn't make it," Michonne spoke under her breath. And just as my mouth parted to ask what she means, she continued. Saying that he broke off to send a flare into town, to draw the walkers on that way instead.

No flare.

*

I was walking, or mindlessly following orders as I tried to keep my mind off of Addie. Off of Daryl. But it was bad, seeing Maggie try and hold herself together after hearing the news about Glenn is one thing. But the wall surrounding the town has a large mote compacted with walkers.

We have a chance of going up and over, rounding towards the other side. But Rick wouldn't sanction the idea. So I didn't bother asking.

Otherwise, I was just on survalliene. Wasting time until someone told me some news, but as I was trying to replace all the guns and ammo. I heard the arguments and bickering in the other room.

With my rifle on my back now did I walk on down through, trying to make sense of it all. 
"I can't even make two meals out of this." A women spoke, forgetful of the name. But her red hair made me remember the dinner party.

She's the one who wished a dentist would come around soon.

So I came forward. Standing by Olivia as she was trying to deal with the crowd. "Soups can be stretched out with some extra water." I offered, but another women came up before me. Her attitude on high as I felt relatively unsafe with this large of a crowd. "What difference does that make if we'll be dead tomorrow?" I huffed, almost feeling the tension did I size up the rest of them.

"We need to ration." I simply decreed, but then a man came forward toward me. Shaking his head. 
"I can't spend whatever time I have left watching my family starve." My eyes knitted together as tilted my head. "Really?... Missing one meal is starving?" I sounded innocently shocked. But my questioned reigned through the entire group.

"What did you do to earn this food?... Survive? Because this doesn't count. Standing behind a wall isn't surviving. We eat this food today, what are we going to do tomorrow?" The guilt started trickling in. And their heads fell. "Or the next day?" I continued. And I could my words striking fear into them.
"You take the ration. Combine resources...We do this now, it'll lead us down a road where nothing matters." Eyeing the girl who complained that the cans before her weren't enough for two meals. And I sized her up, making her take a step back.

"Seventeen people shared less than what you're holding." Issuing the last bit of tension did I finally step aside the crowd, rifle still firmly over my shoulder as I set out to find another place where my services could help.

Then I found myself the fence once again, along with Rick. Fixing the hold of my weapon so that I could climb, did he firmly place his hand to steady me on my feet to look on down.

And the sight created an even deeper pit in my stomach.

"How's Addie?" I shrug, nobody has come to find me. But as I was handed the walkie, I noticed her had an extra. "Forgot what kind of code this would be at the prison." 

"Heard that the attack...Was a code eight." I nodded. Feeling around the walkie as I felt the need to question out.

He nodded. 
"Daryl?... Do you copy?" I spoke, but nothing called out. Not a single static. Don't think it's far enough. And with that, I let out a mask of air away from Rick as I was so sure it'd sound like a sob.

"There's already a panic, Olivia couldn't handle a crowd of people." 

"What'd they want?" His hands on his hips already indicated one thing, and I knew. "Food. Can't take rations." The growl that admitted from his throat had me shift to my other foot.

I feel more than uncomfortable.

"Abe, Sasha...Do you copy?" I called out, the pit in my stomach grew bigger and bigger. Making me grip it further, the tear at the brink of falling down. "You think something's wrong?" My eyes went directly towards him.

How'd he fucking know?

"Blake...I've known you a long time. That look, that's you're over analyzing face." I shoved my shoulder kindly into as I stuck up my face.

"Think there's a reason I didn't put up more of a fight when you told me not to come. I'd be out there with Daryl." 

"And this...This could've been worse." He spoke, pointing off to the building behind us.

"Guess that's the phrase of the day," I growled, closing my eyes and silently praying to whoever was listening that they're okay.

_____

Date Posted: 04-14-19

Time: 9:14

Word-Count: 8459

______