(Virgil's POV)
(A/N: this chapter happens right after Virgil's memory-dream where he got beat up. Yeah, that actually happened. Also, fair warning, there's quite a few graphic descriptions.)

Fire.

I was on fire.

Everything blazed with pain.

My head throbbed.

Why me?

Why do I have to be the one to suffer?

What have I done to deserve this?

Perhaps I should stay here in the dark.

It's nice.

Soothing.

It would be so easy to slip away.

Fade into nothing.

Yeah. That'd be good.

'Hey. Come on, wake up. I've got you.'

No. I don't want to.

'I know you can hear me. You're safe, come back.'

The blissful dark is seeping away. Don't make me go.

'There you are, come on, open your eyes.'

No-

'See? You're back.'

The dark faded completely, my eyes fluttering open. Even the simple movement shot lightning through my body.

"Nrrgh."

"Anxiety? Can you hear me?"

The blurriness cleared from my vision, and my surroundings focused enough for me to decipher what I was seeing. I was in my bed, somehow. My ceiling stared back at me, a bruised shade of purple. Whoever was speaking sat to my left, but moving enough to see them proved impossible.

I braced myself, trying to asses what was damaged. Everything, apparently. I felt a large gash at the top of my left thigh leading all the way to my shin that was partially healed, making it tingle. A bunch of smaller cuts peppered my body, concentrated on my arms, thighs, and hips. My legs basically refused to respond, and if I tried, I could feel about 5 broken bones, including my pelvis. Working upwards, my right arm would not stop spasming, the sporadic jerking aggravating a broken rib on that side. My left arm was mainly unscathed, besides a few cuts and a broken finger. The worst of all was probably my chest and head.

Both throbbed in unison. I knew without looking that my chest was likely covered in bruising, and a warm liquid crept down the right side of my face. If I was able to move, I'd be trying to claw my skull apart. The word "headache" doesn't describe what I felt. It pulsed, a vice grip crushing my brain. The simplest twitch of my head set the pain tripling, and I felt like my sinuses were going to explode. My stomach roiled, churning and twisting without mercy.

A particularly violent arm spasm shot lighting across my body, and I sucked in a sharp breath to swallow my scream.

"...ou been listening to me? Hey! Are you here?!" The voice to my left spoke again, too close to my ear. It took everything I had not to wince.

I struggled to talk. "T- too loud..."

"Oh. I'm sorry-" They whispered. "Do you know who I am? Where you are?"

"No. Yes."

"Well, at least you have some kind of awareness. About on par for you normally, really." They teased.

Being unable to clap back was annoying, a disgruntled sigh just doesn't measure up. I only wanted to know who the hell currently held power over my life.

"Name."

"Mm, you know the ceiling won't tell you it's name, right?"

Holy christ. I was going to lose my shit. Just answer the goddamn question.

"Well now, no need to be so nice!" Ah, I said that last bit out loud. "You were staring at the ceiling, a guy can get confused when he's not addressed directly."

Pain or no, I was about to beat this guy's ass. I was not in the mood for useless taunting. The jackass to my left must've saw me tense (which fucking hurt), because he cut it out.

"Alright, alright. I'm Deceit."

'Deceit??? Why the hell is he here?'

'Wait...'

"Ah, you remembered then." Deceit said after I (sort of) relaxed. "Yeah, I figured I couldn't let my ally lay alone in a hallway, bleeding out and vulnerable. It was absolute murder trying to get you to your room without Boss or one of his minions finding me, I swear. They really did a number on you."

A thought hit me. "W-Wait. How did you-"

"-get into your room?" He finished. "You let me. You were barely conscious, but enough so that you granted me access. You probably do not remember-"

Well, that cut off my next question.

"-Because you were kind of- out of it, for lack of a better word. But rest assured, your wards hold true."

Fantastic. I may be immobile, paralyzed with pain, and at the mercy of a Dark Side, but at least my room was still somewhat safe.

"G-great. I-" violent coughing interrupted my sentence, squeezing my lungs. I turned my head to the side the slightest bit to spit out what I assumed was phlegm, and Deceit swore. A finger wiped the corner of my mouth. He swore again.

"Wh- what...?"

He hesitated, sparking my imagination. What was wrong?

"You've got internal bleeding. You coughed up blood, Anxiety."

Fear pulsed down my spine. The coppery tang in my mouth only solidified that statement.

"I-"

"-shhhh." He interrupted, "Don't talk, just focus on breathing. Keep it even, ok? Try not to cough. I'm going to convince you that the pain isn't that bad, and before you ask, yes I can do that. I'm making you lie to yourself. It's going to feel strange, but it will help, so deal with it okay?"

He placed his hands on my arm, and I felt energy slither over me. It felt foreign, strange. I swear I could hear a voice in my ears, but if I tried to focus on it, it slipped away. It was not a fun feeling to endure, but at least the agony subsided a bit. Besides, I didn't really have a choice. It wasn't like I could move, and even if I could, Deceit far outclassed me in strength at the moment. He'd stop me, I was sure of it.

What I wasn't sure of is why he was here. Why he decided to help me. He directly interfered with the Boss's orders, and that on its own was warrant for intense punishment. We had barely been allies for 96 hours. Prior to that, we despised each other. Hell, I still did, to some degree. I didn't trust him one bit. What changed on his end?

His voice tore me out of my thoughts. "Hey, Anxiety?"

"Hmm?" It was annoying having to stare at the ceiling when talking to someone.

"I know we hated each other only a few days ago, but I want you to know that you can trust me with this."

'Huh. That's strange. It's like he knew what I was thinking about...'

"Truth is, I was really desperate for some sort of ally. I didn't care who it was, low power or what. So when you asked, y'know, a few days ago, that made me really happy." He grabbed my left arm, and I felt a bit of a shock. Probably static electricity. "I know you don't trust me right now, I mean, why would you? But I hope you can one day."

"Oh. Ok." I was floored. I mean, who expects that? We Dark Sides aren't exactly known for our openness. I still didn't trust the guy, but something told me I could relax just the tiniest bit.

There were a few minutes of silence, disturbed only by my shaky breaths, each of us lost in our thoughts. My arm spasmed again, eliciting a sharp intake of breath. I blew out slowly, trying to wade through the pain.

"You okay?" Deceit asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Peachy."

"I'm going to chose to ignore that because of your condition. Should I uh, take a look at what sort of damage you've got?"

"Wait, you haven't yet?" That was a surprise. I would've looked. Maybe? Okay, probably not. But still.

"Uh- well- I uh- no?" He stammered. Odd, I didn't think he was the stuttering type. "I just- thought it would've been, well, weird without your permission."

I tried to laugh, but it turned into a deep, wet cough that wracked my whole body.

"Shit shit shit shit- What do I do?!?" Deceit panicked beside me, muttering to himself. That was helpful. So very helpful. Yes Deceit, asking the gruesomely injured person currently in the process of coughing up a lung what to do is a very good idea.

The barking finally subsided, my breathing evening out. I tilted my head and let the blood drip out, catching the tiniest glimpse of Deceit turning away to avoid looking at said blood.

I laid back down after I was done. "Maybe- maybe you should take a look. I don't wanna die."

The word "die" has a bit of a different meaning to Sides. If we die, we don't stay dead, unless we are no longer a significant enough presence to Thomas to continue to influence him, or he himself dies. We come back, after our bodies shut down due to intense harm or strain. The Reviving process is really freaking difficult though, it'll permanently drain our power, and in most cases, cripples us in some way. Depending on how bad it is, Sides will come back with anything from scars everywhere to an unresponsive limb. I guess we do die, in a way.

"Yeah." Deceit sighed, pulling back my duvet. "You don't want to die. You might end up like me."

"Wait, like you?"

Deceit died before??

"Here, I'm going to move your left arm. Brace yourself."

I bit back a curse as he lifted my arm. "You're- you're avoiding the question. Have you died before?"

"I don't want to talk about it." He muttered, lifting my shirt up to inspect my chest.

I wasn't going to give up that easily. "But you can't just say something like that and not tell!"

"No."

"C'mon, it can't have been that ba-"

"I SAID I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!" His fist tightened on my shirt, voice warping and twisting. It still sounded like him, but there was a serpentine hiss layered underneath. I felt power wash over me, and suddenly I agreed with him. He didn't want to talk about it, that was fine. Better than fine, really. It was probably traumatic.

"Okay, I'm sorry. You're right, you don't want to talk and I should've listened."

He looked up at me. "Why are you suddenly so agreeable?"

I furrowed my brow. "Because you're always right?"

"Oh. I see now. Hold on, one second."

He placed his hands on my torso, and an odd feeling took hold of my body. Like something was being pulled away from me.

After a few seconds, Deceit took his hands away. "Feel any different?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.

"Let's test something. I don't want to talk about my past."

"Oh come on! I mean sure, maybe it was scarring-" he winced, but I continued. "-but it can't have been that bad."

I had to take a minute to regain my breath.

"Alright, you're back to normal. Apologies for that. I momentarily lost focus and seized control of your mind."

"Oh. Wait, what?!"

"Please keep it down." Deceit resumed his inspection of my wounds, talking as he went. "Like I just said, in my moment of anger, I lost my focus and directed my power at the nearest influenceable being, aka you. It took control of your mind and forced you to agree with everything I was saying. So again, apologies."

"You can do that??"

He sighed. "No, Anxiety. I just made it up on the spot for fun."

"Well you don't have to be so sarcastic. It's a lot to take in." I pouted.

"Oh? How so?" Deceit prodded my right shoulder, setting a shock down my arm. The twitching soon stopped.

"I dunno. I just, never really-"

"-thought I was strong?" He finished.

"No, not that." I pondered my next words. "You're really good at hiding your strength. It's smart really, you get to fly under the radar, and nobody thinks of you as a threat. It's like-"

"-Done!" Deceit cut me off.

"Huh?"

"I finished looking you over. Basically everything is hurt in some way or another, and as far as I can tell, you have about three broken ribs and a shattered pelvis. I don't know exactly where the internal blood is coming from though, and that worries me."

"Wow. That's a lot of damage."

"Yeah." He sighed, sitting back down in his chair. "Why did they beat you up again, anyway?"

I winced at the memory that came flooding into my head. "I refused to hurt him again. I just couldn't, you know? It gets harder and harder every time."

"Anxiety. As much as it pains you to hurt Thomas, it's your job. You have to do it, or this happens." Deceit berated.

"I know, I know. It just sucks."

"Well, its going to suck a lot more if they end up killing you."

I stayed quiet and let that ominous statement sink in. Neither of us made a move to break the silence between us, and we sat there for a while, each of us lost in his own head.

Soon enough, another bout of coughing took hold of me, wracking my body. This one went on for a lot longer than the others, and I swear I almost passed out. The resulting pain brought tears to my eyes. If Deceit hadn't been there, I would've started crying. And not just for the pain, but for the reason I had been beat into such a state. Is it really a crime to not want to hurt someone?

"Alright, alright. You're okay, breathe. Deep breaths, come on. I don't care if it hurts, you have to get air in there." Deceit coached, rubbing my shoulder.

A few wheezing-filled moments later, I was able to breathe again.

"This- sucks..." I gasped out.

Deceit didn't respond. He was zoned out, thinking hard. It was like you could see the gears turning in his head.

"Hellloooo?" I tried moving my arm to wave it in front of his face, but quickly abandoned that idea. "Mindscape to Deceit?"

He jerked a little bit. "Hmm? Yeah?"

"Whatcha thinking about?"

Deceit locked eyes with me, staring for an uncomfortably long time before speaking. "We need to get you healed."

"What?? But only Lightners can do that! And only like 3 of them even know how!"

He finally broke eye contact, crossing his arms. "Wow, I had no idea. I thought Dark Sides could heal, even though nobody's ever, and I mean ever, used it to save someone from death. It never occurred to me that only Lightners posses the rare ability to heal the physical form of a Side. Thank you so much for enlightening me, Anxiety."

"Okay, one, screw off. Two, there's no way a Lightner is going to willingly heal a Dark Side." I snapped.

Deceit threw up his arms. "Well do you have a better idea!?!"

I blinked, caught off guard by the yelling. I don't know what I looked like, but it must have been pitiful, because his anger went away almost immediately.

"Sorry. It's just-" He rested his head in his hands, muffling his next words. "You do not have the luxury of waiting to heal. Sooner or later, Boss will force you to do your job again. And, knowing you, you'll refuse again. But with your injuries right now, you will not survive. Do you understand me?"

He was right. Boss isn't exactly a patient man, and he'd send one of his lackeys after me in the next day or so. And, like Deceit said, I can be, uh, stubborn. I hate my job. To force anxiety (small "a" anxiety, not me) on Thomas not only hurts him, it hurts me. I know what it feels like. Like I said, I would never wish an attack on anyone. And besides, I made a promise to myself. I... went overboard. Once. And it will never happen ever again.

"Yeah. Yeah, I understand." I sighed. "How do you think we're going to get a Lightner to agree to heal me?"

Deceit cocked his head. "Threaten them?"

I shot him an "are you an idiot" look. "They won't heal me if we threaten one!"

"Yes, I suppose you might be correct." He stood and starting pacing back and forth, ignoring the random junk on my floor. "I could try to uh, convince one that they want to heal you?"

"I guess that might work." I carefully hoisted myself up to a semi-sitting position, Deceit pausing his walking to watch. "I mean, it's the best we've got."

"Indeed. Have you any idea which Lightner might be the most willing to fall for an illusion?"

"Huh?"

"Has any of them shown even the slightest bit of concern? Interest? Anything?"

"I don't think so. Unless..." I trailed off, staring at the ceiling. It still looked a sickly purple.

"Unless?" Deceit prompted.

"There was one Side. At the border. I was weak, and instead of taking advantage of that, he showed- friendliness? I dunno, it was weird."

"What was his name, Anxiety? Do you know?"

"Hold on, its on the tip of my tongue." It took me a solid minute, but I finally came up with the name. "It was Morality."

"Splendid." Deceit held out a hand to me. "Shall we go find this... Morality?"

"What, right now?"

He rolled his eyes. "Oh I'm sorry, do you need to clear your schedule first? You don't have the luxury of time Anxiety. I know moving is, to be frank, going to hurt like a bitch, but you have to get through it, okay? It'll all be over soon."

I took a breath. "Okay, okay. Let's go pull me back from the cusp of death. You're going to keep the bulk of the pain away still, right?"

"Yes, I'll keep your brain thinking your wounds are but a scratch. You big baby."

"That is the nicest thing you've ever said to me." I wiped away a fake tear. "Honestly and truly, I've never felt so flattered in my life."

"Oh, shut up." Deceit grumbled, grabbing my hand and whisking us away.

I could only hope that our plan would work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Holy gods, I am so so so sorry! I know I say this every chapter. It always takes longer than I expected to write a chapter. Well, this one was 3000 words long, give or take. Maybe that sort of makes up for it??

Also, this chapter and the next happened in the past. Just to clarify. It was all a memory, something that happened before. Right now, in the actual time, Virgil is passed out being taken god knows when by Insanity and Deceit. So yeah, the next chapter is going to wrap up this memory and hopefully introduce you to a bunch of new characters!

I actually started little sketches for all of my character's designs, and I particularly love Insanity's. There's something so freaking unsettling about him every single time I draw him.

Side note: anybody watch Umbrella Academy yet? I'm almost done the first season, I think I've got like 2 episodes to go. And I love it. So much. Sure, some of the acting isn't the greatest, but that's honestly the only critique I have. Aidan Gallagher's acting makes up for all the places where others lack a bit, I think. Except for Robert Sheehan. He makes no mistakes.  Klaus is my baby. I will protect the junkie disaster gay who just wants his boyfriend back with my life.

Anyway, no guarantees on when the next chapter is up. I'll try to make it quick, but as I'm sure you're all learning, I suck at even sort of consistent uploads. Sorry!