I longed to spend days in the warm sun with him—just the two of us, laughing and playing and picking flowers and all the other sappy but wonderful things that couples in love do together. Every sunny day when I was lonely and missing him, I'd look outside and imagine packing a picnic lunch for us, with sandwiches and boiled eggs and fruit from his own trees and juice and a big, gooey chocolate cake. Then we'd take the airship to some distant, quiet spot—maybe Sercerezo Lake—and sit on the soft green grass and eat together in the warm spring sun, with the petals of the cerezo trees falling all around us like pale pink snow. Then he'd look at me and laugh and gently brush off a petal that had landed on my nose, and then he'd lean over and give me a kiss.

It was a lovely daydream.

**************

"Piers, you're funny!" I giggled. "But I love you, too! I love you, and Ellie, and everybody!"

He gave me a puzzled look. "I... I see. But that's not quite what I mean. In that sense, I love everybody, too."

I beamed at him—he was such a dear man, so warm and loving, and it made me so happy whenever he came to see me. Though I couldn't understand why it was that it always felt like there were suddenly butterflies fluttering in my tummy when I saw him.

He cleared his throat, looked at me, then smiled—just like sunshine, I thought happily. "What I mean," he went on, "is that I, as a man, love you, Amber, as a woman."

I smiled at him again. Then it suddenly hit me—he didn't mean that he loved me as in he was fond of me in the way that he was fond of everyone. He... I realized he meant something different... something special. That I was someone special to him.

I opened my mouth, but no sound came out. The butterflies were going crazy in my tummy, and their wings blew away all my words.

"You don't have to answer right away," he quickly added, seeing my confusion. "Let's meet up tomorrow. That will give you some time to think. Meet me at the castle tomorrow, okay? Let's say mid-morning, around 10:00."

I nodded mutely, and stared after him as he turned and left the flower shop, the bell jingling merrily as always as the door opened and closed again. I don't know how long I stood like that, staring blankly, but that was how Ellie found me when she came in just before closing time to see how sales had been that day. When she asked me what was wrong, I just couldn't tell her—I couldn't say the words. But my face felt hot, and it must have been very red, because she smiled and got a wise look in her eyes, and patted me on the shoulder.

"I see, I see. So that's how it is, is it, Amber?"

"H-huh?" I managed to squeak.

"No need to say another word, my dear little Watson! The Great Detective knows all! Piers has poured out his heart to you, and you—you're overwhelmed by your feelings for him!"

I tried to speak, to tell her that wasn't quite it, not exactly, but she was already lost in her own fantasy. Luckily, she shooed me away, saying we'd close up shop early today so that I could have some time to myself. Then she winked at me and ran out the door.

I went up to my room after she left, to think. And I spent all night thinking, and thinking, and thinking. Thinking isn't really something I've ever been very good at, but I really tried hard to think about what he said, and what it all meant.

I knew he already had girlfriends. Four, to be honest. And they were all such nice girls and my dearest, bestest friends. But I didn't really understand... what was love, anyway? What was the difference between loving someone and being 'in love' with them? I had no idea.

My memories of my childhood were vague, and I felt like there was a lot missing. Not as much as Piers—at least I could remember a few things. But I couldn't recall ever thinking that I was 'in love' with anyone. I'd always loved everyone, and loved them all exactly the same, except maybe my Mama and Papa. But even I knew that was different than... than this. Than being 'in love'.

Still, even if I wasn't sure about love, I knew there was something different about Piers. No one else made the butterflies go crazy in my tummy like he did. The first time I felt it, I thought I was sick—I'd never felt anything like it before. Was that love?

Ellie came home then, and when she came upstairs to the apartment she shared with me, I opened up the door to my room and called out to her.

"Ellie? Can I ask you something?" She hurried over, a peculiar little smile on her face, and I blurted out "Does being in love make butterflies?"

She looked confused, so I tried to explain what I meant. But she just looked more and more confused the more I talked. Finally she just patted me on the shoulder again and said, "Listen, Amber. What's important is that you be honest with your feelings. Not just with him, but with yourself, too. Don't try to fool him, and don't try to fool yourself, either. Got it?"

I still didn't get it, but I just nodded, and she smiled and went to her room. So I sat up all night and thought about it, until at last it was time to meet him.

He was already there and waiting for me, and again I felt the butterflies going crazy. But I also felt a queer tightness in my chest, as if I couldn't breathe right all of a sudden. I wanted to spread my wings and fly away, but I also wanted to run straight to him and for him to put his arms around me and tell me everything was fine and that he'd protect me.

So really, I was not only just as confused as I was yesterday, I was even more confused.

"Do you have an answer?" he asked eagerly as soon as I walked up to him.

I just looked at him, lost in my confusion and miserable because of it. "I... I'm sorry, Piers."

His face fell, and I felt like the sun had died. "You mean...."

"I just don't know," I quickly added, trying to explain, to work it out in my head with him, since I couldn't seem to figure it out on my own. "You say you love me, and I know you want me to be with you. But... but I want to be with everyone. I love everybody, not only you. I know you mean something different, that you mean that you're in love. But what does that even mean? What does it mean to be in love? Why do you want to be with me?"

He gave me a wistful kind of a smile, and said, "Because I love you, Amber."

I sighed. "But I don't understand!"

"I love everyone, too. But you—you're special to me. You already know I have other girlfriends. And each of them is special to me. All of you are special to me in your own way, and there's no one that could ever take any of your places in my heart. I don't love anyone the way I love you—there's no one like you in the whole wide world, not to me. When I see you, I want to hold you close and shelter you, and for you to smile with joy for me. I want to get closer to you, to get to know more about you and to share things with you. I want to be there with you when you're happy, but also when you're sad or scared or worried. I want to help you when things are hard for you, and I want to protect you when you're in danger."

"So... that's love? Wanting to be with someone, and for them to be happy, and to help them when they're scared or sad?" I was still confused—I wanted that for everyone.

"Ye-e-es, that's part of it. It's so hard to put into words, you see. I only know that out of all the people in this town, there's no one that I feel about like I feel about you. I can't pin it down and label it, anymore than you could lock up a sunbeam or imprison a breeze. But even if I can't spell it out for you, it's there, all the same. Of that, at least, I am certain."

I thought about what he said for a minute, then shook my head. "I'm sorry, Piers. I still don't understand. But... but you do, even if you can't explain it. And you're sure, even if I'm not. You picked me out of all the others to fill a special place in your heart, and so since you picked me, I... I'll let you."

His face brightened, and suddenly the sunshine poured over me, warming me from the little antennae on my head down to my pinky toes.

"Then you mean...?"

"Yes, Piers. I'll be with you. And maybe someday, I'll understand, too."

If love was like the sunshine, warm and nourishing and full of joy, then this must be love, I thought to myself as he wrapped his arms around me and held me close.