"DON'T BLAME ME FOR FALLING,
I WAS JUST A LITTLE BOY."
- harry styles, to be so lonely

"You kids get these groceries over to Figure Eight. Get straight back here when you're done. No fishin'. I promised delivery by this afternoon." Heyward was telling JJ, Avery, and Pope as the trio grabbed the bags he was handing them to the teens. JJ stood, planting his feet in place and outstretched his arms, waiting for Heyward to hand him more bags. "Rich folks don't wanna wait around for you lazy sons of- oh, JJ, thank you- lazy sons of bitches."

JJ let his arms fall as the groceries in the bag clunked on the side of the boat, lazily turning and putting the remaining bags onto the table where Pope and Avery had stacked the others.

"Right." Pope mumbled.

"I'll keep 'em in line, dad." Avery assured, patting Heyward on the shoulder and smiling warmly at him.

"I know you will." Heyward added, giving the girl a small smile before she went to the closed top of the boat with JJ and Pope, the younger Heyward steering while JJ sat on the countertop flipping a knife in the air and catching it repeatedly.

"If you cut yourself I'm not taking you to the hospital." Avery deadpanned, sitting on the counter next to the Maybank boy, who smirked at her.

"Well then I guess you would have to nurse me back to health, huh?" He questioned, Avery rolling her eyes and pretending to gag and the flirtatious comment. JJ obviously wouldn't stop hitting on her, that would make it too obvious to the Pogues that something was going on between the two.

"Doesn't even look like the storm hit here." Pope cut the two off, Avery and JJ glancing out of the cabin at the elaborate houses and clean backyards of Figure Eight. The Decker finally felt that her home belonged on the south side now that there was an excess of debris and loose limbs of trees blown across her lawn.

"That's because they got generators, bro. Get used to it." JJ replied bitterly. "And then they say the juice'll be out all summer at the Cut, unless you're Avery, of course."

"You seemed to be enjoying my air conditioning last night." Avery told the boy bluntly. Her generator had finally arrived and gotten hooked up to the main power supply of her house, providing the Pogues with a place to get out of the beating July heat.

"It's nice to be a Kook." Pope said sourly.

"Lucky bastards." JJ added. Avery couldn't really contribute to the discussion, she was only helping because JJ had practically begged her to, she would probably use the money she made to get a couple steaks to make a nice dinner for the boys.

The boat cruised to a steady stop, JJ tying the lines off.

"This order's huge, I'll take it with Pope, JJ, grab this smaller one, it just goes up the hill. Then you can take the others." Avery instructed the Maybank, who seemed slightly upset at the thought of Avery not delivering with him, but she mouthed a quick 'Sorry' to the blonde before grabbing an armful of bags and following Pope, who had started towards the golf course.

"So how was it?" The Heyward asked suddenly, after checking to make sure that he and Avery were out of JJ's earshot.

"How was what?" She asked cluelessly.

"Come on, Ave, I know you two kissed." Pope told the Decker bluntly, Avery almost falling over herself at the accusation- more of a statement of truth than anything, and stared at the boy.

"How did you know?" Avery continued to question as the two rounded a corner, only to not get an answer to her question, as she and Pope were unpleasantly greeted by Rafe and Topper.

"Hey, how much for one of those beers?" Rafe asked as he used his golf club to stop Pope from walking any further forward.

"They're not for sale." He deadpanned.

"Not for sale... okay, okay, Avery, how about a shot of that tequila?" Rafe tried, nodding towards the bottle in one of Avery's grocery bags.

"It's not for sale either." The Decker retorted, looking at Rafe like he was an idiot.

"Oh, come on, Decker, I know your people love it more than anything but that's no reason to be selfish." Rafe taunted, Avery raising her eyebrows.

"'My people'? And who exactly is that?" She questioned, Rafe shrugging.

"You're really gonna make me say it?" He asked, Avery nodding, pretending to be intrigued by whatever the Cameron boy had to say, though she already knew his answer. "Y'know... Mexicans?"

"So close!" Avery praised sarcastically. "I'm actually Brazilian, but I'm glad we've clarified you're a racist."

"Well, if Avery's too selfish to share, and the beers aren't for sale, then you can just give us one, right?" Rafe asked Pope, although he was clearly flustered by Avery calling him out on his improper labeling of her in his insult.

"Or you can order one, like everybody else." Pope retorted, trying to sound intimidating to the two Kooks, but it wasn't working. He attempted to keep walking, but Rafe rested a hand on the boy's shoulder.

"Listen. Wait, wait, wait. You're not listening to me. Um... You've got so many, bro, and we've got nothing." Rafe explained, pointing between himself and Topper, the Thornton boy nodding in agreement.

"Nothin'." The frosted-tipped Kook told the two.

"They're not even ours, they're already paid for." Pope was telling the two insistently.

"Already paid for?" Rafe confirmed. "What the hell? You probably stole 'em, right?"

"The amount of racism you've spewed in the last five minutes is unbelievable." Avery stated bluntly. Rafe wasn't listening, however, and instead put the head of his golf club into Pope's grocery sack and tore it down the side, causing all the food inside to spill out onto the sand.

"What the hell? You owe me for that!" Pope exclaimed, pointing at Rafe, who flung the other grocery sack in Pope's hand out of his grasp and into the weeds.

"Dude, I don't owe you shit, Pogue." Rafe taunted further, stumbling backwards when Pope shoved him.

"Buy your own shit!" The Heyward yelled. But Topper had involved himself now, attempting to grab the case of beers from under Pope's arm.

"Hey, man, come on! We just want one of these beers. Just give us one of these-" The Thornton began, shoving Pope to the ground as he wrestled the box from his grasp.

"Topper!" Avery shouted.

"Don't you have a lawn to mow?" Rafe asked her, an evil grin splitting across his face as he stared down the Decker. "Now why don't you turn your pretty face around so you don't have to see this."

Avery looked down at where Pope was groaning on the ground, loose cans of beer and groceries scattered across the sand as the Heyward struggled to force a full breath. Her first instinct was to drop the bags of groceries in her hands and help him up, to leave and come back in a couple hours when Rafe and Topper had left and deliver the groceries then, but as she tried to step forward, she was greeting with the head of Rafe's golf club making harsh contact with her chest.

"Stay back!" He screamed, Avery massaging her sternum and struggling to breathe, reaching into the back pocket of her shorts to try and find her phone, just to remember that she had left it on the countertop of the boat.

Pope eventually got his footing back, attempting to throw a punch at Rafe, who had already began to swing his golf club at the boy's stomach like a baseball bat, hitting him over the back with it once Pope doubled over in pain.

"Hey! Rafe, Rafe! Come on, man!" Topper shouted as Rafe stared at where Pope was crumpled on the ground again, blood seeping from the corner of his mouth.

"Stay down, bitch!" Rafe screamed, breathing heavily as he looked down at the boy groaning in pain.

"Hey, let's go! Let's go, man!" Topper was still shouting, but he too seemed to be scared of Rafe in this aggressive state. This was confirmed when the Cameron boy began to shove his friend, angry that he even suggested leaving.

"What, man?" He shouted angrily.

"Knock it off, Rafe! Come on!" Topper yelled. Rafe instead whooped gleefully, slamming his golf club on the ground next to Pope's head, the Heyward helplessly rolling away from the impact.

"Knock it off!" Topper repeated, but Rafe wasn't quite finished. He knelt down on the ground next to Pope, turning the boy's head to face him as he got closer to his face.

"We don't want you over here, got that? Stay off Figure Eight, Pogue." He then turned to Avery. "And you, tell your little boyfriend it'll be worse than that bruise on your collarbone next time he wants to start shit, okay?"

Avery looked at Topper, who was staring at Pope like he had just realized what he had done. Rafe was calling him to go with him, the case of beers that weren't scattered across the ground in his hand.

"Topper-" Avery breathed, the Thornton boy turning to her before looking away and immediately walking towards Rafe. Avery pulled herself to her feet and walked over to Pope. "Hey, hey, you're okay."

"No- no I'm not- Avery, I'm not gonna be able to walk-" Pope choked out, turning his head to the side and spitting blood into the sand.

"Come on, let's get you back to the boat." Avery mumbled, looping an arm through Pope's and slinging one of his over her shoulders, pulling him to his feet despite the pain it caused the Heyward, Avery practically carrying him back to the boat.

"I feel- I feel like my head's bleeding." Pope mumbled as Avery sat him on the counter, the Decker noticing that the last of the bags were gone already, meaning JJ had been back for the second round of deliveries already.

"That's because it is." She deadpanned, tugging John B's t-shirt from her frame and pressing it to the side of the Heyward boy's head, noticing the way he immediately tensed up and gasped in pain.

"Don't tell JJ." Pope demanded immediately. "If he finds out Rafe touched you-"

"Pope, I can't cover it. I just put my only shirt on the side of your head, he'll ask more questions if I'm wearing a bloody t-shirt." Avery fired, putting Pope's cap back on his head gently as approaching footsteps at a running pace told them JJ was back.

"Pope! Avery!" He called, and the Decker could hear his laughing as he did. "Dude, you are not going to believe what just happened to me, man! That was the best hundred bucks I've ever made! When I say count me in on all these grocery deliveries, Pope, I mean it!"

JJ immediately noticed how quiet Pope and Avery were, the way that Avery had her body turned so he couldn't see the front, and Pope had his eyes trained in front of him as he steered the boat away from the dock.

"What's up with you two? You good?" JJ asked, craning a look at Pope, his face falling when he noticed the dried blood on the side of Pope's head. "Yo, what happened to your face, dude?"

Avery turned and watched as JJ reached for Pope's cap, lifting it just enough to see the large gash on the side of his head before Pope pulled it back down.

"Jesus!" He exclaimed, turning to Avery. He walked towards her, gently grabbing the upper part of her arm and turning her body around, eyes fixated on the massive golf club shaped bruise on her sternum. "Who the hell touched you?"

"Rafe." Avery breathed immediately. "He and Topper jumped us, he beat Pope with a golf club and knocked me in the chest."

JJ's jaw clenched as he looked down at the bruise that was only growing darker.

"He said that next time you wanted to start shit, I was gonna get off a lot worse than this." Avery added, glancing over at Pope.

"They said no Pogues on their side of the island." The Heyward added. "Said some real racist shit to Avery too."

"They did what?" JJ asked, Avery could tell the boy was seeing red from the way his eyes had hooded over and his voice had dropped in octaves. "Avery, what did they say?"

"A bunch of shit about me being Mexican even though I'm not even Mexican." Avery deadpanned. JJ still looked like he was ready to take the wheel from Pope and go back to shore, just to rip Rafe and Topper apart limb by limb, but Avery grabbed his biceps and looked at him pleadingly. "JJ, it's not a big deal-"

"Look at that!" The blonde exclaimed, pointing at the large bruise blossoming under Avery's bikini top. "This is a big deal, Ave, I don't wanna see you hurt."

Avery's face fell more at the tone of JJ's voice- he sounded beyond upset that she had gotten hurt and he hadn't been there to protect her, upset that he had a chance to take Pope's place and deliver that order with Avery rather than sending her off with Pope onto Figure Eight.

"JJ, please, you're being irrational." Avery pleaded quietly, JJ turning back towards Pope, the Decker noticing the tear track on his face, her heart falling at the sight. Before she knew it, they had anchored just outside of the Thornton residence, the three teens staring at the maroon boat docked about twenty feet away.

"The 2020 Malibu 24- MXC. The world's finest wakesetter. Number one in quality, luxury, and performance." Pope rattled off as though he was some sort of salesman attempting to sell the boat to JJ and Avery rather than put it at the bottom of the ocean.

"This is war, Pope." JJ reminded his friend. "They hit us, we hit them. Do it." He added, pulling a bandana over his face as Pope tugged his now sand-covered button down off, essentially flopping into the water before paddling off to the boat. Avery watched as he climbed onboard, the boy's figure momentarily disappearing before he jumped back into the water, the boat already beginning to slip beneath the surface.

"He did it." Avery mumbled, a grin planted across her face as she turned to JJ. "He actually did it."

Soon enough, Pope returned, a small object clutched in his hand, which Avery recognized as the plug for the bottom of the boat which kept water from entering the drain holes.

"I'm so proud of you right now, holy crap!" JJ exclaimed quietly, a look of pride painted across his face as he smiled at Pope, who was looking more stressed than anything.

"JJ? Avery?" He breathed, both teens turning to him with raised eyebrows. "You can't tell anybody."

"Oh, no, yeah. Totally dude." JJ told his friend unconvincingly. Avery could tell from a mile away he was already planning on telling the story to John B in painstakingly elaborate detail.

"No, I'm serious, dude. Not Kie, not John B, nobody." Pope exclaimed, looking between the two of them, Avery nodding.

"Yup, my lips are sealed. Give me that, give me that." JJ mumbled, grabbing the plug from Pope's hand and lobbing it into the water. "Okay! Let's get outta here."

The boy instinctively grabbed Avery by the waist to pull her into the cabin, but immediately broke away when he remembered that Pope was there and the two of them had to be discreet around the Pogues. The duo turned to the wall of the cabin where a row of windows was carved out, watching as Topper's boat continued to sink into the ocean, another grin spreading across Avery's face at the sight.

"John B and Kie still wanna surf, don't they?" The Decker questioned, JJ nodding. "Our boards are at my house, Pope, if you just drop us off then we can pick you up."

"Yeah, yeah, that sounds good." Pope muttered distractedly, Avery watching as the realization of what he had just done set in. There was no going back- the boat was no longer visible above the surface of the water.

"No regrets, Pope, you can't go back now." The brunette girl told her friend. "He had it coming anyways, you know it too."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Pope mumbled, still sounding unsure of himself. JJ wrapped an arm around Avery's shoulders and pulled her close to him, his eyes still fixated on the large bruise on her collarbone.

"I'm gonna kill Rafe." JJ gritted, but Avery shook her head, brushing a few strands of JJ's hair away from his face.

"I'm okay, JJ, I promise." Avery whispered, subconsciously grabbing the shark tooth necklace dangling from JJ's neck and fiddling with it between the pads of her fingers. "Even better now that I'm back with you."

"When're you just gonna ask if you can have the necklace?" He whispered, Avery glancing up at him and noticing the smirk on his face. "I can get you one, sweet thing."

"Gag me!" Pope exclaimed from in front of the duo, who had clearly forgotten the Heyward's presence as he turned to them with disgust covering his features.

"I'm with Pope on this, that was horrible- by the way, Pope knows, don't ask me how." Avery added. "But 'Sweet Thing' sounds like Justin Bieber circa 2012."

"That was the point, baby." JJ replied jokingly before looking up at Pope. "You'd better keep your mouth shut."

"I'm not telling anyone." Pope said to Maybank sincerely, the blonde's hand finding its way to the exposed skin on Avery's lower back where the tail of a lemon shark the Decker had tattooed down her spine was inked into her flesh. It was one she had gotten shortly before moving to the Outer Banks, and when JJ found out about it a couple weeks after the first time they met, when the duo was out boating with John B, he thought it was the coolest thing he had ever seen.

"You'd better not." Avery mumbled, but she had turned her gaze back to JJ and was smiling widely, the blonde boy staring back down at her with a wide grin on his face. The two felt tranquil in the moment, as though nothing could break the feeling of euphoria that hung in the air and suffocated all the negativity and secret-keeping around their relationship, like there was no one left on the island- screw the island, no one in the world- but them.

After surfing with the Pogues, Avery had, unfortunately, had to go back home instead of going to put the drone out with the others. Lennon had blown up her phone all afternoon- she was surprised her father ever remembered she existed- and seemed absolutely outraged that she had been 'dodging his calls'.

"Dad, what do you want me to say? I can't have my phone with me in the ocean!" Avery exclaimed as she paced back and forth across her living room. The laces of her Converse that were tied around the high-top part of her shoes had managed to slide off the canvas and were now wrapped tightly around her ankle, but Avery didn't notice as she continued to argue with her father. "And since when do you care what mom thinks? You had an affair."

"You will stop using that against me right now. I don't know where this disrespectful attitude is coming from, but your mother and I did not raise you to behave like this!" Lennon spat furiously from the other end of the phone.

"Oh, you didn't?" Avery fired back. "Dad, you haven't asked me how I like it here once. You haven't asked about my friends, my hobbies, my job, anything. You don't care about me, okay? And by the way, I know Gabriella is pregnant, so how about you go worry about your new family instead of focusing in the disappointment daughter that you never wanted to begin with."

"Avery, I love and care about you very much, you are not a disappointment." The older Decker attempted to console his daughter, but Avery could only scoff in response.

"Oh, you do?" Avery questioned. "When's my birthday, dad?"

Silence.

Radio silence.

"You don't care about me." Avery mumbled, pretending to laugh in amusement at the situation. "You can't even try to hide it- I want you to be honest with me, when's Gabriella's birthday? Huh?"

Lennon was silent for a moment, but he eventually answered.

"January fourteenth."

It was just then that realization hit him of how hard he had screwed up in sending Avery away, in making her the outcast in his and Talia's divorce. Picking Gabriella over his daughter seemed like the right decision to make at the moment, when he felt so in love with the woman that nothing else mattered to him, but now, the daughter with his eyes and her mother's hair would hardly talk to him.

"I can't believe you." Avery mumbled. Her voice shook slightly, on the verge of cracking as the younger Decker felt tears well into her eyes. This was supposed to be her father, someone she could some to when she needed comfort and advice on how to do things in life. JJ had taught her how to change her oil and use a drain snake and hurricane prep a house, all things that Lennon hadn't bothered to teach his daughter before her departure from Texas.

"Avery, baby, please-"

"No." Avery told her dad, attempting to sound firm, but her voice wouldn't allow it as it wobbled out of control. "You don't get to call me that, I'm not your baby anymore. You lost that when you picked her over me."

"Avery, I have apologized time and time again, you won't even hear me out-"

"And I don't have to!" Avery exclaimed. She couldn't hold back the cracking of her voice as tears fell down her face in free fall, the girl doing her best to hold back the sob crawling its way up her throat as she spoke to her father. "You picked a hookup with your secretary over your family, I don't owe you anything."

"It would mean a lot to me and your mother if you came home for the remainder of the summer." Lennon told his daughter calmly.

"You don't care about mom, you just want to rub your new, happy, perfect family in my face and show me that you don't need me anymore, I'm not an idiot."

"Avery-"

"I'm not done!" Avery shouted. "You haven't cared about me in years, don't pretend to deny it. I don't want to go back there for summer, I'm happy here and you and mom both can't seem to wrap your minds around the fact that despite your best attempts to make me miserable, I'm happy here. So please, use your last shot to piss off mom one last time and let me stay. Please."

Avery had pulled her phone away from her ear and put it on speaker, setting it on the hardwood floor next to where she had slid down the doorframe of her bedroom, placing her hand over her mouth to muffle the sound of her crying.

"You can stay." Lennon spoke finally, Avery watching as the call dropped and her father hung up. Immediately, Avery pulled herself up, walking to her bathroom and turning the tap to the coldest possible setting, letting the water run until the metal of the faucet was cold to touch. She then went to the kitchen, filling a large Tupperware container with ice before carrying it back to the bathroom to soak her face in, hoping to pull the puffiness out of her eyes.

When the cold became so unbearable against her skin, the brunette picked her face up, wiping the water away with her palms and looking in the mirror. There were faint red rims around her irises, but she could get rid of those easily. Dumping the water and ice into the sink, Avery began pacing around the house, attempting to give herself some sort of grounding- she was allowed to stay, to be with JJ and John B for the rest of the summer, she wasn't being forced to go back to Texas.

So why was it so hard to breathe?

"Avery?" A familiar voice called through the house, coming from upstairs. Avery immediately ran up towards it, JJ standing in the doorway looking incredibly disappointed.

"Did you guys find it?" The Decker asked hopefully, but JJ shook his head.

"Wasn't there." He said shortly. "The boat was, the gold wasn't- have you been crying?"

"No." Avery denied, shaking her head. "I scratched my eye with one of my nails earlier so they probably watered a bit, but no, I haven't been crying."

"You sure?" JJ asked, eyebrows knitted together as he looked at the blonde in front of him. "Your eyes are all red."

"I'm sure." Avery assured, nodding confidently, doing her best to keep the tears from immediately returning to her eyes.

"Kiara invited us to that movie in the park, you wanna go?" The Maybank questioned, Avery nodding happily.

"Yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun, who all's going?" She questioned.

"I think it's just us, Pope, and Kie. John B's been M.I.A. since we got back." JJ explained. "Are you sure you're okay, baby? You don't look good."

"I'm fine, I promise." Avery whispered, brushing some of JJ's hair off his forehead. "Never better."

kens speaks 🪐

i'm actually so excited for next chapter you have no idea

also thank you so much for 1k, you guys are absolutely amazing!!