chapter twelve

bloodclot

I walked back to the Murder Tower, tennis shoes crunching over the gravel, Tsukasa walking in comfortable silence next to me. The moon was high over the complex and had my surroundings been anything other than what they were, I would have considered it beautiful.

I heard a rustling behind me and felt a weight nuzzling my leg. Turning my head, it was hard not to smile as I noticed that the small shorthaired stray had followed Tsukasa and me.

The blond grinned. "Looks like you have a friend for life, Sakura-chan."

Despite all the dangers that cat could have posed to me in that moment (rabies, ticks, Lyme disease caused by said ticks, fleas. Need I go on?), I couldn't bring myself to leave the poor thing behind, scooping him up in my arms and carrying him with me towards the Murder Tower stairs.

I didn't even stop to think about what my mother might have thought, which would normally be concern numero uno.

We walked in a comfortable silence as we went up the rickety metal stairs to my floor. Few people were out, save for a suspicious middle aged guy in a white tank top who was leaning over the railing, glowing cigarette in between his lips.

I pretended not to notice Tsukasa silently stepping in between me and the man with the cigarette, an action that made my heart swell as I stopped by the front door, placing the shorthaired cat back on the ground, where he started pawing at my legs again as he mewled.

"Just give me a second." I mumbled, struggling with the keys, and then the digital locks through fingerprint identification on my phone.

God, Tsukasa probably thought that I was crazy.

When I finally slipped the key in the lock, I was extra cautious to get inside the apartment as quick as possible, waiting for the cat to follow before I slammed the door, turning the lock before resetting the two automatic locks.

Tsukasa raised an eyebrow. "That's a lot of locks."

"Hope Hills isn't the safest place to be a teenage girl."

"I'm sorry about that. Kidra, right?"

I nodded. "After what happened to Yasushi, I've been on edge constantly. This was the only way that I would stay here alone."

Tsukasa kicked off his shoes, settling himself on the suede couch in the living room, the stary cat following him over and jumping up next to him to sit on the cream-colored fabric. "You're not alone anymore. Look, you've got an attack cat now."

I laughed to myself, pulling off my hoodie. "An attack cat?"

"Hey, strays can be vicious. You know how many scratches I used to come home with when I started taking care of these guys? My brother actually thought I had a girlfriend and that I was going out to get laid every night. Then he wanted her name to verify that she was real because he didn't believe I was looking after cats."

I crossed into the living room, settling on the couch next to the boy and the cat, running my fingers through the fine, coarse grey hair. The cat hummed affectionately, nuzzling into my side.

"What are you going to name him?" Tsukasa asked, scratching the feline behind it's ears.

"Pierre." I said with finality. "After Pierre Gasly, he drives for Scuderia AlphaTauri."

Tsukasa laughed, running a hand through his magnificent hair. I couldn't help but stare at his forearms, and the muscle visible below his elbow from where he had pushed up the sleeves of his plaid flannel button-down.

"Could you stay with me tonight?" Shut up, Sakura. Internally, I was at war with myself. I couldn't believe that I had even said it. "You've seen all the locks. I'm still not super comfortable staying here all on my own."

He reached for my hand, my stomach doing somersaults at the contact. My heart waws beating out of my chest, my throat suddenly dryer than overcooked chicken. If I had tried to speak, as long as he was touching me, I doubted I would be able to from words.

"Of course, I'll stay. You shouldn't be alone here, especially if it makes you anxious."

"Thank you." I hoped that the half light would be effective in hiding the blush beginning to cat my cheeks.

There were so many issues with even having Tsukasa over right now. I barely knew him, for God's sakes. What was my mother going to say when she came home and saw that I had a boy over? Not even just any boy, but an Oya boy.

She'd die of shock, but then I was torn between thinking she'd be extremely pissed off, and then happy that I was making friends.

And then she'd lecture me on being alone in the apartment with boys, which would be followed by a conversation about proper condom usage, which is not a can of worms I felt like opening.

"Do you want a glass of water or anything?" I asked softly, shifting on the couch so I could get up and head over to the kitchen. He nodded his head, and I came back with two pale peach colored IKEA glasses filled with ice water.

We descended into a silence that bordered on uneasy as I grabbed the TV remote, flicking on an old Scooby Doo movie that I had seen countless times before when I was younger. It was already past the time that I normally would have gone to sleep anyway, I didn't need to put on something that would require any form of extreme concentration this late at night. We managed minor small talk as we watched the animated characters on the screen debunk the mystery of the Yowie Yahoo at Vampire Rock. When I started to yawn, ten minutes to the big reveal, Tsukasa insisted that I needed to get some rest, and I was inclined to agree.

But what to do with the boy who insisted on staying? The feeling in the pit of my stomach waws foreign and tingly at the mere thought of sharing a bed with the blond Adonis. 

"We don't have a spare room, and there's no air mattress. Sorry about that." I apologized, gently pushing the door to my room open. There was something so intimate about sharing my own personal space with somebody else, especially someone like Tsukasa.

Pierre the cat darted in before us, and Tsukasa waited in the doorway as I walked towards the twin bed and its ditsy lemon print comforter, tossing fluffy throw pillows on the floor before using the long pale yellow pillow that sat behind the mound of pillows on my bed to create a barrier between his side of the bed and mine.

"Come on, I'm not letting you sleep on the floor."

"Only if you're comfortable with it." Tsukasa insisted, still looking at my dimly lit room in awe, the only light coming from the heart-shaped string lights over my window. "It's very...you in here. You've made a shitty Hope Hills apartment really feel like home."

"Thanks...I think." My brain launched into overdrive to search for the compliment within those words, scrambling and rearranging in my brain to even try to find what Tsukasa was truly trying to say.

He was right, I had managed to make the room feel like home. Above my bed, the wall was covered in photographs of me and Yasushi, me Madoka and Yui, some of me and my father. Above my desk was my poster of Kazuki from Doberman Infnity, the desk cluttered with a teal IKEA lamp, pastel midliners and brightly colored MINSIO pens. The die-cast telephone booth that I bought when dad and I went on that weekender to London.

"Take a look at this. Guess who I'm with." I smiled slightly, pointing at one of the pictures above my bed.

Tsukasa squinted at the 4 x 6, concentration marring his adorable features and his wide hazel eyes. "Oh my God, is that Yasushi?"

I laughed. "That was maybe three years ago, when we went to see Doberman Infinity. It was my freshman year, and he was trying to put his transfer to Oya in motion. He was going through a little bit of a mall goth phase."

In the picture, he had a striped long sleeve on underneath his Doberman Infinity shirt, white streaks running through his hair. His bangs were long enough to cover his eyes and he used to constantly have to rake his hair out of his face.

That was the year he developed his crush on Bianca Tsumeragi, and I have not known peace since.

Tsukasa slipped his phone out of his pocket, snapping a quick picture of the 4 x 6. "Wait until I tell Fujio about this."

"You can't, unless you want to admit that you've been in my room, thus unleashing a torrent of bullying down upon your gorgeous blond body."

"Touché, Kobayashi. Touché." 

I gingerly made my way to the bed, laying down on top of the covers. Coincidentally, I just happened to be facing Tsukasa, the body pillow barrier being the only thing stopping me from reaching out and running my fingers through his silky, dyed locks. But god, did I want to.

Actually, what I really wanted to do was lean over and kiss him, pressing my body against his.

But that was not going to happen on my watch. Not today.

Nervously, I rested my hand on top of the pillow barrier, desperate for something to hold on to. I'm a very touchy feely person, so I need that physical contact, that comfort. Typically when I'm asleep, that comes in the form of a stuffed animal or me draping my entire body over a pillow, and when Yasushi is over it ends with one of use getting shoved off the bed. I've always needed that security, and my dad's working theory is that it's because of my anxiety, but my mother thinks that I'll grow out of it.

Today, we were draping my body over the body pillow and wishing it was the boy beside me.

I was just getting comfortable enough to drift off when I felt a warm weight on top of my hand. Opening my bleary eyes in the almost darkness, my heart started beating, warmth spreading throughout all of my limbs.

Tsukasa was half asleep, his floppy hair in front of his eyes, a peaceful expression on his face, lips parted ever so slightly.

And his hand was on top of mine.

"Tread carefully, Takajo." I whispered, lacing my fingers with his. "Otherwise I might just fall in love with you."