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"So, living it up in this tower the size of Big Ben?" Bill teases, "I always knew you were made for the life of fame and fortune."

Freya smirks. 

"That's me. Tony will have me wiping my arse with golden toilet paper soon enough."

Jen snorts.

"Enough, you two. Honestly, you're worse than Reg and I arguing over which is Taylor's best album. Folkl-"

"-Evermore."

Reggie and Jenny look at each other in disgust, crossing their arms over their chests and pouting like a child denied nap time.

"Reginald May-Taylor, I will call you and Bill's mom and make a formal bloody complaint."

"Stepmother, Jennifer. I'll call Perrie and inform her of your Swiftie infidelity."

Jen gasps.

"You wouldn't dare."

Reggie squints his eyes a bit, staring Jen straight in the eye.

"Oh, but I wo-"

"-Okay, is it time to discuss our solo albums and band album?"

"Fine. Bill, you're in charge."

"Right, I say that since Freya already has a solo single, she should release an album first. After a single comes an album, after all. Then, I believe Reggie should release a single, Jennifer an album, Reggie another single and then QUEEN an album. I have no desire for a solo career."

Jen raises an eyebrow. 

"Why isn't Reg recording an album?"

Instead of Bill answering, the man in question responds.

"I would like to really draw out my album. Release it about a year after the first two singles drop."

Freya hums in agreement.

"Yeah- Sounds like what I'm going to do."

Reg wraps an arm around Freya's shoulder.

"We're all going to be rich rich by the end of this."

Everyone else looks at the drummer with an incredulous look.

"Our yearly pay is literally more than five million each."

"Well- luckily enough, we'll be donating a lot of money to our charities."

Jen smiles.

"Yup. Otherwise, Freya would have far too much golden toilet paper and we'd all have to start wiping our arses with it."

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"Is it just me, or are we completely pissed? I'm about to fall over and I've only had one, two...seven drinks."

Freya snorts into her second glass of wine.

"No, Reg, I am not. You know how I feel about too much alcohol. At most three glasses and then I'm done."

Jen comes up to Reggie and Freya, wrapping her arms over them.

"Right, I've had three cups. I think it's time to write our songs."

"We need Bill," Freya points out. "Where is he?"

"I dunno," Jen shrugs. "He said he wasn't feeling very well. He'll probably be here-"

"I'm here, let's get on with it," Bill snaps.

Even drunken Reggie picks up on his step-brother's obvious anger and ruffled-up state.

"Are you alright?" Freya whispers. "You look rough."

"Well, you looked rough for years and now you're all happy and shiny. I'll be fine."

Reggie frowns at Bill's attitude, confused as to why he's being so aggressive and looks so sickly.

"Hey, don't talk to Yefra...Freya, like that, mate. It's not cool."

Bill shoves Reggie away.

"Yeah well, neither is this whole 'going solo' thing. Sit the fuck down and start writing."

Reggie raises his hands up in defeat, Jen frowning at Freya.

A few hours later and the band is effectively nowhere.

Freya is thinking about her soulmates, Reggie is still upset at Bill, and Bill is starting to sweat and clutch his side while Jen is getting drunk just to ease the tension.

She knows how to rock and roll

She drives me crazy

She gives me hot and cold fever

She leaves me in a cool, cool sweat

Reggie continues to write, not listening as Bill and Jen begin to fight, Freya trying to step in.

Crazy little thing called love

Removing his pen from the notebook paper, all QUEEN members begin to groan in pain.

"What the actual hell is happening?" Freya grimaces, rubbing at her ankle.

"It looks like we're soul pheasants," Reggie smiles dreamily, looking down at where three marks clearly belonging to Jen, Freya, and Bill now lie.

"Soul mates," Freya corrects, struggling to come to terms with everything.

"Platonic soulmates," Bill grunts out, trying to loosen his collar.

"I-"

"I'm going," Jen drunkenly declares. "I am going to be sick very soon, and I'd personally like my wife with me when that happens. Goodbye, Soul Pheasants."

Freya calls out after her as soon as she turns towards the door.

"Be careful, Jen. Stay by the window until the Taxi comes."

Saluting with a nod, the guitarist stumbles away.

"I'm leaving too," Bill grumbles.

"Why? Are you actually alright-"

"Do I look alright to you, dimwitt? I know you're not very good at emotions- considering you had two drunken bastards for parents and a gaslighting manwhore as a soulmate- but I'd think you could detect my emotions right now. I'm pissed, and not in an alcoholic way."

Freya crosses her arms over her chest as Reggie begins to be sick in a nearby toilet.

"That's not fair, William, and you know it."

Bill scoffs.

"I do, don't I?"

He then walks out of the door, leaving Freya with only two of three marks accepted.

"Bill! Don't just walk away!"

His car door slams shut and the engine grows louder and then softer the further away he drives.

Freya lets out a frustrated sob before wiping up her tears and helping Reggie by holding his ponytail up.

"Love you, Freyalindaly Bultanara Mercuzo."

"I love you too, Reginald. Always."

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August 

Edited: June 2023

A/N: Bear with me, guys.