chapter twenty-nine

trip the light fantastic

DECEMBER TWENTY-SECOND

ONE MONTH LATER

The next month passed in the blink of an eye. My resident status came through, and I started working again in Rascals territory. Tetsu still worked at the bathhouse, but his father was lightening up on him a bit, and he was thinking of actually doing something with his interior design degree. 

I talked to my mother at least once a week, usually on a Thursday night when Tetsu pulled the unfortunate night shift. Mom was doing alright back in New Mexico. She moved out of my grandparents' house, and bought an apartment in Santa Fe. She'd recently started working for one of the natural heritage sites, and she seemed to be enjoying it.

A lot of things also happened in and around S.W.O.R.D, and I was starting to realize that would would never change. They finally found Himari Iemura, but of course, once S.W.O.R.D found her, the Kamizono family did as well, and she was whisked back away to the big city where she was going to remain under house arrest until her wedding, but after eavesdropping on a few S.W.O.R.D meetings, I realized that Hyuga had a plan to break her out that involved crashing said wedding.

Smokey was rushed into emergency surgery for a tumor on his lungs. I think everybody within S.W.O.R.D was shocked. We knew Smokey was sick, but we didn't know it was that bad. Takeshi and Lala were able to get him into the hospital in time, and with Himari's family money, the surgery saved his life. Everybody could tell he was crazy about the heiress, and he was beating himself up about letting Yuu Kamizono take her back.

After the hot springs weekend, I kept in touch with Midori Yamada, and we'd get together for coffee at Itokan with Naomi frequently. It was nice to have friends around, especially ones who understood the chaos of S.W.O.R.D. That's also how I found out that Midori and Murayama had gotten engaged, and that Murayama was planning on leaving Oya Kokoh and handing the reins over to a new generation of fighters.

Naomi and Yamato had officially made their relationship public, resulting in a very public argument with Tsukomo and Kohaku, Naomi's overprotective brother-figures ( even though they're like twice her age ). Now that everything was out in the open, Chiharu and Dan could no longer speculate and make wild guesses.  They'd since moved on to finding out who Cobra's mystery woman was, with no such luck.

I had started attending an alcoholics anonymous group in an unregulated bordertown between Sannoh and Oya. It was freeing to talk about my struggles since Yuki died with a group of people who would truly understand. When I reached my six month mark in my second sobriety journey, Tetsu and the other guys in Sannoh Rengokai had thrown me a party at Itokan. Back home, I barely even got a cake when I hit two years. I'd also been spending more time with Ukyo Sena and Shu Kato. I think my presence was helping them both move on through some of the guilt that they felt after Fuyumi died, and they were genuinely nice people. God, I like having Ukyo around, but he could talk your ear off about Fuyumi, may she rest in peace, and his younger son Takahide, even though the boy hasn't talked to him in almost three years. But please, don't get him started on his two ex wives. He's a hopeless romantic: the get married first, ask questions later type.

"So remind me again why you aren't asking this gorgeous woman that you have been dating for almost five years to marry you, even though you have a pinterest board devoted to engagement rings." I said, turning my head against the snow flurries to face Tsukomo. We were out walking Sting, and I was taking in my first Christmas in Japan.

Tsukomo rolled his eyes, almost as if he knew what was coming. "It's not that I don't love Mira, but goddamn is she a complicated woman. We've been dating for five years, and we don't even live together!"

In that moment, I thought back to a moment the weekend before, when I was supposed to walk Sting because Tsukomo was out of town with Mira. They must have gotten back early, because when I threw the door open, they were fucking on the living room couch. 

There wasn't enough holy water in the world to unsee that.

"Tsukomo, neither of you are getting any younger." I pointed out, and Sting barked as if agreeing with me as we walked past the large Christmas tree in Sannoh's town square.

"Thanks for the reminder, kid. It's not that I haven't thought about it, Mira is just-"

"Complicated.' I said, finishing his sentence for him as we turned on to the shopping street. 

"Exactly."

I shook my head with a smile as I passed him back the leash, setting off across the street to Itokan. Contrary to popular belief, white Christmases are very rare in Ontario. It does snow, but not often and never in time for December twenty-fifth, and the scorching heat in New Mexico casts Christmas in a whole other vibe. I was excited for my first white Christmas, but also vastly unprepared when it came to the winter wear my mother mailed over. Some of the warmer things were still in transit, so I was wading through slush and puddles in a pair of black suede cowboy boots.

I pushed open the door to Itokan, desperate for a coffee and indoor heating. the diner was busier than usual: a group of former Mugen members I knew from the memorial packed in a booth by the door,  a group of highschool kids in red blazers at the picnic table down the middle of the restaurant, three girls from Ichigo Milk laughing at the bar, and a few couples cramming in one last takeout meal before the holidays scattered throughout.

I walked right up to the bar, saying hello to Naomi before ordering my usual French vanilla, something Naomi was able to guess by now. I smiled, taking a sip of the coffee and making a little bit of small talk before I knew that I had to go back into the cold to finish walking Sting. Naomi turned around to grab a plate of omurice to take to one of the tables in the back, and when she walked past, I was gripped with a sudden wave of nausea that wracked my body. I had to grip the countertop just to stay standing, which was strange because I usually enjoyed the smells of homemade cooking from within the diner.

"Gillian, are you okay?" Junko asked, jumping to her feet. "You look pale, sweetie."

"I'm fine, Junko-san-" I started to say before I felt the vomit creeping up the back of my throat. "Scratch that, I think I'm gonna be sick."

Naomi came rushing back from the corner booth, grabbing the mop bucket from underneath the counter. She held my hair back from my face as I bent over the plastic bucket, emptying the contents of my stomach. I hadn't been this sick since the withdrawal from the first time I stopped drinking.

"Feel any better?" Naomi asked, rubbing circles on my back.

I nodded, the nausea passing. "Junko, can you grab me a glass of water? I have no idea what happened there."

Naomi hesitated. "Gillian, I'm sure it's nothing, but is there even the smallest chance that you could be pregnant? Like, have you been feeling off lately, any sort of morning sickness or anything like that."

I shook my head, trying to think. "No, no sickness or anything. I mean, I have been a little moody lately but I chalked that up to not being able to spend Christmas with my mother this year." I reached into the pocket of my jacket, flipping through the calendar on my phone. "Oh shit." I said under my breath, in English of course, a habit I picked up unintentionally since my stay, like the way I would curse in Japanese back home.

"Gilly, what is it?" Junko asked, concerned as she passed me the glass of water.

"My period is late." I breathed. "Who wants to run and get me a pregnancy test, because I am not having this conversation with Tsukomo?"

____

An hour later, I came back to the townhouse in shock, my mind stuck on the little pink plus sign on the test that Nonoriki had picked up.

I was pregnant, and now I had to figure out how to tell Tetsu, the love of my life.

The man in question was in the living room, humming to himself in tune with the radio as he hung two glittery stockings in front of the large stone fireplace. The Christmas tree lights were turned on, and the entire living room was bathed in a warm glow. It smelt like peppermint and gingerbread, two candles lit on the mantle amongst the fake holly and tinsel. I stood in the doorway trying to take it all in while I grappled with the things I needed to say.

Tetsu turned around, grinning when he saw me standing there. "Hey baby! I thought I'd just do a little bit more decorating, what do you think?"

"I think Santa's workshop puked in our living room." I laughed, but my heart wasn't in it. It was now or never. Or, when it started to be obvious I was carrying a child. "But I think you might need another stocking by the fireplace."

Tetsu looked confused. "Why? I finally got Dan to leave me alone this Christmas. He's spending it in Tokyo with his mom and his cousin's family."

I shook my head, nervously tucking my hands in the pockets of my woolen sweater. "Think of it as an early Christmas present."

"Are we getting a dog?"

Idiot, and I mean that in the nicest way possible. "Tetsu," I said, biting the bullet and deciding to come straight out with it. "I'm pregnant."

The world seemed to stop turning for a moment as we stood there, listening to the music stop n his phone as Tetsu seemed to turn the words over and over in his head. All I could think of was that I had fucked up.

"You're pregnant." Tetsu said slowly. "And that means that I'm the father." His face brightened. "I'm gonna be a dad!" He shouted, a massive smile blooming across his face. "Holy shit, I'm gonna be a dad! Just wait until I tell Dan-"

I smiled, glad it had all gone right, glad it had gone the absolute best way it possibly could have. "Hold your horses, Tetsu. Dan isn't allowed near my kid unless I'm in the room. No fucking way am I letting him get our baby involved in some hair brained scheme."

"Okay." Tetsu was still smiling, running a hand through his hair. "We're going to be parents. This is huge." He dropped his hand, pulling me into his arms and giving me a gentle kiss. "Merry Christmas, my love."

I sniffled, trying not to get my freshly formed tears on his ugly Christmas sweater as I held onto him tightly. "Merry Christmas, sweetheart."

NOTES!

so i was going to post this at christmas but simply hadn't written a few of teh chapters leading up to it so here you go.

ALSO theres only an epilogue left and i am actually sad that I have to leave my chaos couple behind.