"so you told him?" suhyun says.

"yep."

"and you dont know if he's really upset even though he said hes not upset?" namjoon asks.

"mhm."

"minjae, exactly why are you asking us this when you are the one with a degree in psychology." suhyun looks up from her phone.

i sat up from the couch, when i asked for help, they started to act like my counselors and made this whole counseling session.

"im panicking okay? i cant think straight."

"well why dont you just ask him?" suhyun suggests, "be the straightforward, blunt, minjae i know."

"but im scared." i mumble.

namjoon rubs his temples, "did you just say you were scared? oh my god, i dont even know you anymore."

i throw a pillow at his face, "get out! why are you even here in the first place?"

"i live here. and you asked for advice-"

"i asked suhyun for advice you just happened to be standing there." i huff.

i lie back down, "anyways, what should i do?"

"talk to him." namjoon says.
"dont be stupid, namjoon." i reply.

"want me to ask him instead-" "no"

namjoon put his phone to his ear, "hyung minjae has to ask you something."

"namjoon i am going to kill you-" i threw another pillow at his face but he smacked it out of the way, the pillow ended up hitting a vase. it fell to the floor and shattered into pieces.

we all started at it with wide eyes as if it was going to fix itself.

"namjoon-ah, what happened, did you break something again?" yoongi says through the phone.

"crap-" namjoon said under his breath.

suhyun groaned, "i loved that vase."

"ah, minjae has to ask you something." before i could protest, namjoon threw his phone at me.
they both got up to clean up the mess.

"minjae? what is it?" yoongi asks.

apparently namjoon put it on speaker so when i put the phone to my ear, i almost went deaf.

"oh its nothing important really-" "just tell me."

"im just wondering if you're really upset about me going to america. i can tell my professor i changed my mind-"

"i would be lying if i said i wasnt upset but it would help you finish school faster, which is what you want. so its best for you to go."

i sighed, "yes its what i want but what about you?"

he chuckles, "i just want you to be happy."

i sat there in disbelief, "heol. what happened to you?"

suhyun squeals and starts hitting namjoons arm, "ow." he says rubbing his arm, "stop it will you?"

"okay, uh, thanks for telling me, bye." before yoongi could say anything i hung up.

"yah, how could you hang up so quickly?" suhyun scolded me, "you didnt even say i love you."

i lie back down on the couch in a fetus position, hugging a pillow.

"do i need to say i love him so he knows?"

i then realized that i never really told yoongi i loved him. even if i do i call him an idiot afterwards.

"no but its always nice to just hear those words from your significant other. even if you do, i bet you call him an idiot or something after."

oh crap she read my mind.

"she does." namjoon says.

"i do not." i lie.

namjoon crosses his arms, "prove it."

i grabbed my phone and called yoongi.

"what is it now?" yoongi says as soon as he picks up.

"i just wanted to say, i love you." i pull the phone away from my face, cover my mouth and whisper, idiot, so no one hears me.

"thanks, i love you too, i guess." he awkwardly replies.

i immediately hang up.

suhyun sighs and shakes her head, "you guys have been dating for how long, four.. five months, and you cant even say such simple words?"

i frown, "well how do you lovebirds
say it then."

suhyun shrugs her shoulders, "we just say it." she turns her head to namjoon and smiles at him, "i love you."

namjoon smiles back and pokes her nose, "i love you too."

i gag at them, "i am literally going to break my neck from cringing.

ーーー
currently in another state with my sister (and no parents i miss my mom😭) and shes forcing me to socialize.

everyone keeps asking me if im ok (bc i have an rbf and am extremely introverted)

she is currently talking with friends (i only know like two people) while i am in the corner writing this.

i wanna go home.