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JIMIN almost considered himself crazy after several years of having his life on track. he could practically see it: the words park jimin, stupid fool written in big, intimidating letters across his tombstone.

his breath quickened as he pulled from the curb, driving steadily to the place she had told him a while ago. a small part of him actually felt bad for leaving taehyung at the coffee shop, making him eligible to pay two half-eaten sandwiches and jimin's leftover macchiato, along with his own coffee drink. but he couldn't care; not right now, at least. and he didn't plan on giving a single shit either. he promised himself he would apologize for leaving without giving a plausible explanation, but right now, that was the not the worst of his worries.

not when seulgi was crying at the other end of the line, brokenhearted and lost out of her mind.

his grip on the steering wheel tightened at the recollection of her voice. it was hoarser than usual, and he could hear the sobs threatening to come out at any moment. it was a moment of pure weakness – both for him and seulgi – and there was nothing more he could do.

she needed him by her side. and that's where he was going.

every minute that passed by, every curb he turned into, his brain was cursing him. what happened to standing your ground, jimin? what happened to cutting her off from your life, jimin? what happened to trying to move on, jimin? he was repeatedly questioning himself as to why everything he'd been planning to do, everything that had to do with his emotional attachment to kang seulgi, was all going to the dump.

he thought he could convince himself to finally let go and forget her, because that was all he wanted to do. but this was kang seulgi we were talking about; jimin hadn't been with many women for the span of his adult life, but he knew there was something to seulgi when every little thing drew him back to her, even with their little arguments, or their hesitant stares at each other, even after a year of breaking up. 

truth be told, seeing her again after a whole year, even though not at the best circumstance he imagined, was the happiest he's ever been so far, for all he knew.

and his saddest so far, after moving into an apartment with a girl he knew dearly, was seeing that same girl broken, sitting at the pavement of the downtown seoul sidewalk.

he took off his sunglasses and slung them at the dashboard, opening the door as a quietly as he could to get out, gaze still fixated on her. she still looked like the way he remembered this morning: hair in a nice, tight bun, with a dark sweater and jeans. her whole face was swollen, and her eyes were puffy and red from all of the tears.

she didn't even look at him when he made his way across the street, or when he sat down beside her, bringing his knees closer to his body.

he had no idea seulgi was cursing herself with the same thoughts in her own mind; why, of all people, did she always have to go and force herself onto jimin, like her life depended on it.

but now that he was here, not of that seemed to matter.

for a while, they were silent. all they could hear were seulgi's silent sobbing, jimin's shallow breaths as he stared at her with his head down, and the distant buzzing of the three-pm traffic at the other end of the highway.

seulgi didn't need to talk; she was appreciating the silence more, especially with jimin by her side. he was there, and he didn't look like he planned on leaving.

the silence seemed to last for hours, even though jimin knew a few minutes barely passed for the duration of their being together. time was always like this when he was around seulgi; both now and even a year ago. it was a trance he was hoping never to escape from, because it was better than he had imagined.

the peace was subtly disturbed when seulgi, nose still red, eyes still swollen, but tears a little drier than before, laid her head on his shoulder, still sniffling.

jimin turned to her, his forearms now on his knees, and laid his cheek on her head. her hair still smelled like the familiar coconut scent he knew so well, and he saw her hands trembling, even though she was constantly trying to make it stop.

he decided to take matters into his own hands, and take both of hers in his, warming them up, trying to get them to stop shaking. he had pretty small hands himself, but seulgi's hands felt even smaller in his, and they felt safe and secure, like they belonged to each other.

seulgi let out a small gasp when she felt his hands on her, but only closed her eyes to breathe once they started to feel warm and cozy.

and for a while, they stayed like that, with their own silence again, jimin's now slow and steady breathing giving her the solace she'd been yearning for.

jimin wished they could stay like this. but seulgi didn't seem to think so when she broke the silence. "i-i didn't get it."

he tipped his head down. "didn't get what?"

she sniffled. "the part," she said softly. "i-it was stupid to even try."

"seulgi," jimin said, his voice calm and soothing. "baby, don't think like that."

"th-they said my acting was overbearing," she continued, her voice trembling again. "that-that i could overshadow the lead, since i was only auditioning for a supporting role."

jimin could only sigh; part of him understood how this was breaking her, but he knew he still wouldn't get a grip on how bad the pain actually was, no matter how hard he tried.

"this is so petty." she sniffled as she started to wipe her tears again. "i'm so fucking petty-"

"you're not, seulgi, stop it." jimin held her hand tighter. "you're not petty, okay? this is your dream. you've been working hard for this, this is anything but petty, trust me."

more tears started to flow from her eyes as she lifted her head up, looking down at the pavement. jimin moved his gaze to her, her bangs still covering some parts of her face, her lower lip quivering from all the crying.

"i-i'm s–" she couldn't speak amidst all of the trembling she was going through, and her hands trembled as she brought herself closer to him, feeling his warmth as he cried. "i'm s-so, jimin–"

jimin closed his eyes. seeing seulgi cry made him broken more than he could even expect. "hey," he said, hushing her, rubbing her hands and back slowly, his cheek still rested onto the crown of her head, making her calm down a bit, "it's okay."

"n-no, it's-"

"it's really okay, seulgi." jimin could feel his shirt dampening at the sleeves, but he didn't mind. he kept his eyes closed. "just f-forget about it, okay?"

he felt seulgi tremble less and less as he held her, right there, at the edge of the sidewalk. "we don't even have to talk. i'm right here."

and that was honestly enough for her.

jimin was still right there, holding her, after a good few minutes of crying, a few tears escaping his own eyes. people from seoul walked by them, and started staring, but they couldn't care any less.

they were both stuck in their own little world, where nothing else mattered but their feelings towards each other, in the form of small little droplets of tears running down both their faces. it was a small sign to begin with, but it was real.

it definitely was real, jimin thought.

"you know," jimin said, in a voice as hushed as before once seulgi's tears were dried and she was calmer than before, "i've never really told you to this, but you look prettier after you cry." seulgi let out a trembled laugh before giving his hand a small pinch.

jimin chuckled lightly, sniffling too. "i'm not joking," he said. "guess those agents didn't realize that sooner."

she let out a small sigh, and so did he. 

"don't beat yourself up over this, sweet cheeks." jimin pressed his cheek to her head once more. "it's just one audition. you'll do better soon."

"i hope so," seulgi replied in a small voice, lifting her head. she looked at him with a red nose and swollen eyes, and jimin confirmed it: she did look prettier when she was crying.

he foughr the strong urge to kiss her, then and there.

"well, i know so." jimin said, offering her a small smile. 

there was another pause, letting each of them just scan each other, look each other in the eye. the world seemed to pause every time park jimin would stare at kang seulgi's eyes, and it was a bliss he wanted to hold on to forever. 

"home? i'll drive you."

seulgi sniffled and gave a quaint little nod, before jimin brought himself up and helped her up and inside his car, closing the door behind her, and getting up on his own.

he looked at her one more time as she settled in the black sedan, waiting for her to look at him, and giving her a small smile of assurance once she did, which she returned.

the drive home was silent; it wasn't the peaceful type of silence, nor was it the unsettling type. jimin could barely drive when he was tearing his eyes off the road from time to time to look at her, while she was staring blankly at the window of the passenger seat, trying to convince herself that everything was already okay - even though she knew for sure it still wasn't yet.

he tried to distract himself with the bright lights of the seoul highways at this time of day, how the colors seemed to pop as the sun was beginning to descend, how soothing the different colors could be to a heart that was pumping rapidly in his chest. 

but although he could feel the comfort inside of him, he still felt uneasy. which still made him glance at her from time to time.

he'd been fighting with his own self in his mind, resisting the urge to let go of the wheel and reach over to hold her hand, to let her see through him, to assure her everything was going to be alright, that as long as his heart was beating for her, she'd be okay.

all the while, seulgi had no idea. she had her own thoughts to worry about.

she didn't think jimin would come chasing after her; she didn't think he'd pick up after two rings and come straight to her and comfort her after all that she's done to him. 

she looked outside, and tried scanning every face she could see walking down the busy streets of the city, but her eyes always led her to image of jimin at the glass's reflection, driving intently, chewing his lip with nervousness, glancing at her at least three times in a minute.

why was he doing this to himself?

jimin parked the car at the sidewalk opposite their apartment complex's building, and looked over to glance at her again as soon as he put the vehicle on neutral. she looked at him, too, and although her lips formed a small smile, he could tell by the way her eyes never seemed to heal that she wasn't okay.

"thanks for the lift." she turned away to open the car door and exit.

he followed her hasty steps inside the building, almost sprinting after her as she entered the password to the lobby's doors and proceeded to the elevator.

his gaze never really left her, and always trailed behind her. 

"seulgi–" jimin called as soon as seulgi started walking to their apartment door after the elevator doors dinged open, walking behind her. jimin knew she wasn't trying to run; maybe it was because he was too distracted by the look of despair on her face that he never got to notice her trailing away.

but that wasn't the case when she looked at him intently before entering the password to their apartment, and entering without a word, closing the door to her room behind her, leaving jimin by the doorway, his shoes still on, looking more disappointed than he usually did.

he gave a sigh, closing his eyes.

he entered his room and threw his keys on the table before sitting down on the bed, worried. his thoughts were running rampant into his mind, and he was getting more and more confused by the minute. he tried to push them away, outside of his brain, but he couldn't, not to any extent. 

why was she running away form him?

seulgi, behind her own door, stood inches apart from her bed, with the same thoughts. it was typical of jimin to care so much, especially after a situation like that. after being together with him for almost a year, and being roommates with him for almost half of one, she'd assumed she'd gotten used to it by now.

but she still had no idea how to react, or why she thought of running away from him. 

why was she running away from him?  

jimin didn't get it; seulgi didn't either. 

jimin tried to convince himself that she's just hurt; she's looking for space, trying to sort out whatever was on her mind, trying to fix it all back. this had nothing to do with the way she felt about him - at least, in his own mind it wasn't.

seulgi was getting mad at herself again; why, all of times, did she have to push jimin away at her weakest, when he was there and ready to accept her into his arms, no explanation needed? why did she keep on running away from him, whenever she felt like it was getting more painful for him, when it wasn't?

jimin stood up. he wasn't going to drown himself in doubt anymore.

seulgi opened the door to her room and stared at the handle of jimin's door. she decided that she wasn't going to run away anymore; it was time to embrace what she truly felt, to tell park jimin what she really felt.

and the only way to do that was to get his attention.

kang seulgi opened the door to his room, hands shaking even more than before, and there he was: park jimin, in the same clothes he's worn that afternoon, his shirt half-open, staring at her with wide eyes and a gleam in his eyes that she couldn't describe.

all she knew was she had the same gleam in her own eyes.

jimin looked at her, and took in her glory; kang seulgi, no makeup, in a dark sweater that hid her away, in pink socks that always managed to make him smile, with a distressed bun of hair at the top of her head and a reddish tinge to her face. 

he couldn't even bring himself to say a single word to describe her beauty.

their minds were scattering with thoughts, but they all meant to think the same thing: i'm here.

and in a matter of seconds, she pressed herself onto him, closing the gap between their lips, letting her arms snake around his neck and his hands slither around her waist. and he didn't even fight it; he just closed her eyes and pressed his forehead onto hers, getting used to the familiar feeling he has been looking for.

jimin had never thought he'd feel that same bliss he'd been yearning for ever since he saw her again.

seulgi never thought she'd pour herself out for a man again - but this was jimin. park jimin. he was different. he meant something to her, she'd give herself that.

she kissed him. and he kissed her back.

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wOw that was intense haha double update today!! (and i'm really going to do it watch me)

- nayeonsbunny -