listen to ghost of you by 5sos while reading if you wanna sob 🙃

Addison's POV

The image of Niall taking that last breath was burned into my brain. It wouldn't leave.

I sobbed into his chest.

"Breathe, Niall!"  I screamed.

A woman pried me off of Niall.

"Settle down, ma'am," she attempted.

I would have listened, but Im awful in these types of situations.

"Settle down?" I exhaled in fury. "My husband just died, and my daughter is unconscious! Who knows if she'll ever regain the strength to breathe again! I'll be alone! I'll have no one! I'll..." I trailed off before collapsing into the woman's arms.

The woman rubbed my back soothingly as I cried into her shoulder.

"We'll get them back," she coaxed.

I stared at the olive green chair next to me. There were two chairs against a yellow wall that faced the white hospital bed. The white hospital bed where unconscious Niall laid, breathing unevenly. Next to him was the heart monitor that continuously told me that his beating was irregular.

I turned my gaze towards the window on the other side of the room. I stared at that window to distract me from my practically dead family.

I was interrupted from my thoughts when a nurse came into the room.

"How is he?" the lady asked as she walked towards Niall.

I shrugged. The lady looked back at me with hopeful eyes and a crooked frown.

"You should probably get home soon," the lady mentioned. "It's almost ten."

"I should be fine," I yawned.

The woman shook her head. "You're tired. The couch isn't cozy enough. Head home, we got them in good hands."

She smiled back at me with sad eyes.

"I guess," I sighed as I stood up. "Thank you."

"Of course," the woman replied. "It's my job."

I gathered my things and kissed Niall's forehead.

When I got home, the house seemed empty. No Ivy running up to me.

"Mommy!" the curly headed girl ran up to me with wide open arms.

I scooped her up as she squeezed me into a tight hug.

"I missed you so much!" Ivy squealed.

No scent of burning food from Niall attempting to cook.

"What is that burning stench?" I grimaced as I put Ivy down.

"Oh, nothin' love!" Niall hollered from the kitchen as the smoke alarm went off.

The house was lonely. It wasn't as homely as it had always been. I flicked on the lights to the kitchen and leaned against the counter.

"It's so quiet," I muttered to myself.

I pulled my phone from my pocket and opened my Spotify. I shuffled a playlist in hopes it would make me feel better. The familiar strumming of the guitar started.

Here I am waking up, still can't sleep on your side

Ghost Of You by 5 Seconds Of Summer. My mind went back to when Niall and I had first met and he begged me to listen to 5SOS.

"Come on, they're good!" Niall pleaded.

"I already have my favorite artists," I joked as I played with his blonde tips.

"I know, I'm amazing. But hear me out!" Niall turned towards me. "They are my friends!"

"You make a good point..." I teased.

I never knew that I would be here in this moment. Niall in the hospital, listening to the song that I related to the most right now.

So I drown it out like I always do dancing through our house with the ghost of you...

I slid down the side of the counter, my head in my hands against my knees.

Calum's solo started.

Calum fake punched me in the arm. "Aww, I made Addison cry!"  he teased.

"Stop it, Cal," I whined. "You know Amnesia is sad!"

"Of course I know, we wrote it to be like that," Calum reasoned.

"Therefore I have the right to cry!" I exclaimed.

Calum laughed before staring at me intently. He started singing the words to Amnesia as he looked me in the eyes. I didn't notice I was crying again until the a tear fell from my chin and Calum stopped singing to laugh and wipe it off.

"What'd ya do Cal?" Ashton boomed jokingly as he walked in the room. "Making Niall's girl cry!"

"Oh, shut up!" I yelled at him, causing both Calum and Ashton to laugh.

When the chorus started again, I hummed along with voice cracks in the humming. The memories of when the boys were on tour flooded back, some of which were with Niall, and some weren't.

Niall pointed out to the fans. I watched from backstage. He was owning it. I saw some object fly to his knee. The one he just had surgery on.

I watched my boyfriend try not to cry as he limped down the stage, Louis trying to comfort him. That was one of those moments when I knew that Niall had the best friends. They would do anything to help him. They were like "five best friends" as Zayn would say.

I sniffed. I missed those days. Niall's blonde hair. Niall having friends he was always with, and wasn't always embarrassed to have me with. One where he didn't need a beard to cover me up for about a year. When he only decided to show me to the public again when I was pregnant.

I was reminded of the day when Niall got a cover up girlfriend. It was the end of 2015.

I scrolled through all of the headlines about Niall being spotted with some blonde, and how he had broken up with me. I sat on the couch backstage. I couldn't help but cry.

I put my phone away and cried into my own arms, Normally Niall would be there to hold me when I was upset, but he was too busy faking it with some other chic to be here with me.

"You alright, love?" a familiar accent rang through the room. I looked up to see Harry.

I nodded and wiped my snot and tears away, embarrassed. Harry came up to me and sat with me on the couch. I stayed silent.

"Don't hold in the tears," he told me. "It's bad for you. I won't judge."

I stared at the green eyed boy for a moment before all my emotions spilled out. I sobbed and sobbed, and Harry wrapped his arms around me, coaxing me.

"I'm always here, alright?" he whispered. "Call me whenever."

I nodded into his shoulder.

I missed the boys a lot. When Niall was super jerky, there were always four other people to turn to, plus the four boys from 5SOS. Someone was always there. And now when a I really needed someone, I  didn't have anybody.

Unless I could call Harry. But, he probably changed his number.

It was worth a shot. I pulled out my phone and opened my contacts, scrolling down a bit to S. I clicked on his name and crossed my fingers that he would answer. The buzzing started. I could already here the answer that I anticipated.

Your call had been forwarded to an automatic voice message.

I hated that stupid robot voice thing. It made me sad when I just wanted to talk to someone.

The buzzing noise that the dial made continued.

I waited for the robot.

The buzzing stopped. Here comes the robot.

"Hello?" a deep British accent spoke through the speakers.

"Harry?" I whispered.

WOOOO NEW CHAPTER DEFINITELY DIDNT CRY WRITING IT WOOO

song—> ghost of you by 5 seconds of summer