"Fall in!" Jake commanded the three, turning around to face his children. Neteyam held his head low as his steps came to a stop, Sersei putting a hand on his shoulder with furrowed brows. He shook his head softly and gave his attention back to their father.

"You're supposed to be spotters. You spot bogeys, and you call 'em in. From a distance!" His voice was laced with anger, shifting his eyes between the three teens. Jake's hands were flying around with his words. "Does any of this sound familiar? Get here!" He pointed sharply to the ground, eyes narrowed at Lo'ak.

Sersei laid her gaze upon her father with pursed lips and a face full of guilt. Jake took a quick glance at Neteyam and knew what he was going to try to do. The boy always took the blame for everything, but Jake couldn't blame him. When they were younger, he used to take most of the heat away from Tommy, even if it wasn't his fault.

The twins shared a look with each other. It ended with Sersei looking dejected, sighing soundlessly, and Neteyam biting his tongue from saying too much.

Jake let his left hand rest on his army green vest. "Jesus, I let you three geniuses fly a mission and you disobey direct orders." The moment his eyes met his eldest daughter's, his hardened gaze fell for just a moment. Sersei looked so guilty, so sad, he couldn't help but take an inconspicuous pause.

Guilt was a fickle thing.

Kiri came up beside her older sister and grazed her fingertips over the superficial patch of ripped skin on her right side. Sersei winced heavily, jumping away from the girl's touch and inhaling sharply. When their eyes met, Sersei subtly shook her head in protest.

Jake sighed and gestured with his hand to the girl. "Kiri, can you go help your grandmother with the wounded? Please?"

The girl shifted her gaze and gave a hard look at her father. "My sister and brother are wounded."

Sersei sent Kiri a harsh glare at her words, slapping her hand instantly as Neteyam put out his hand to shoo the girl away. He didn't want any more trouble with their father.

Jake, to his own dismay, looked down at Sersei's side. His eyes widened at the sight of her injury, pointing to it quickly with his brows furrowed. "You were hurt this entire time and you didn't tell me?"

Sersei tried to alleviate the tension by shrugging off his worry with her gaze trained to the ground. "I didn't even notice. It doesn't hurt."

The man scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief. Turning his attention to his youngest kid, he pointed to the direction of the medical tent. "Tuk, go with her!" The girl looked up from her inspection of Lo'ak, still lifting up his arm before dropping it and leaving without a question.

Kiri rolled her eyes, meeting her sister's gaze with annoyance. Sersei nodded over to the direction their father pointed and only thinned her lips. "Just go," she whispered, ears falling down gently. "It's okay."

The younger girl groaned. "Fine."

"Father," Neteyam kept his head down. "I- I take full responsibility-"

"Yeah, you do!" Jake cut him off. "That's right, 'cause you're the older brother, you gotta act like it!"

Sersei grabbed a hold of Neteyam's hand and gave it a quick squeeze. Physical contact was better than silence and nothing.

"Ma Jake," Neytiri interrupted. "Your son is actually bleeding."

"Mother, it's- it's fine, I-" Neteyam got cut off by Sersei, who nudged his arm gently and gave him a hard look.

Jake sighed and shook his head. "Just go and get patched up. Go on, dismissed." He waved off the two. Neytiri grabbed a hold of the boy's arm and tapped the girl's shoulder, dragging them away and looking back at Lo'ak one last time.

Sersei turned her head to meet her younger brother's gaze, too. She gently shook her head as her ears twitched down to decline any attempts of stupidity he would try to take. The girl finally trailed behind her mother and older brother, hoping the naive boy got her message.

Lo'ak's head turned at his father's harsh voice. "You do understand that you almost got both your older siblings killed?"

The boy answered without hesitation in a guilty voice. "Yes, sir."

Jake bit his tongue and shook his head. "You're grounded. No flying for a month." He paused for a moment, looking out at the sky visible around the entrance to the camp. "You know if anything happened to those two, blood would be on your hands? Anything,"

Lo'ak knew his father liked Neteyam the most out of all his kids. It was because Neteyam was perfect, the golden child, everything a parent wanted in their son. And Sersei was always compliant, never asked any more than she needed, always following orders without hesitation.

He burned with envy of the two and how perfect they were.

"Now see to the ikrans, all of them!" Jake demanded.

Lo'ak nodded again. "...Yes, sir."

"And get that crap off your face." The man walked away with a scowl on his face. Jake had to be mad. If he wasn't angry, he would lose himself.

Seeing Sersei on the ground with ash covering her body was bad. If she was knocked unconscious, body still, it would have been worse at first glance. Thinking back to all the deaths of the people he knew, the warriors he led who would never leave the battlefield all haunted his mind. Jake didn't think he could handle one of his kids dying.

If Sersei died, he would never forgive himself. Jake was bestowed with a bittersweet gift from Eywa; his deceased older brother in the form of his second born. Jake thought he'd lost both of them. More importantly, he thought he'd lost the one thing he could cling onto as a reminder of Tommy besides his body.

He would never get over his fear.

—

Sersei crouched down next to her brother soundlessly, watching his side profile cautiously. He kept his eyes trained forward without sparing a glance at his sister. She looked forward to mimic him, though uncomfortable at the silence.

"I know you're feeling down, Teyam, you don't fool me." The girl nudged his shoulder gently and smiled. Her eyes flickered down to his injury, wincing a bit at the nasty sight of it. When he wouldn't budge, she sighed. "You can't escape me."

Neteyam looked down at his fingers and played with them, a frown appearing on his lips. "I know," he mumbled. "I'm just hoping you leave me alone if I ignore you long enough."

The corners of her lips perked up at his attitude. "Rude," she replied. "But please, talk to me, what's going on?"

The boy sucked in a breath through his teeth and turned his head to face his sister. "I just- I'm-" he stuttered. "I just... wish I could be good enough for him. I want this war to end and for us to be a normal family again, when Dad wasn't so hard on us."

Sersei sighed and rubbed his back softly. There was nothing she could do about their father, but she could comfort her twin brother. That was what mattered. "War is draining and tiring. We will never be free from violence. Perhaps," she paused and bit her lip. "Perhaps this is our fate. We must endure and survive if we want to live."

Neteyam sniffled, as Sersei realized he began to cry. "I don't want this life anymore. All this killing and fighting, I just-" he choked. "I just want it to end." He wiped his own tears away from his cheeks as soon as they fell from his eyes.

Sersei's gaze softened. Her hand perched on his shoulder, brows furrowed with her lips parted. Seeing her twin brother cry made her feel like crying, too. She was too empathic for her own good. "We all do, Teyam. This way of living has an end somewhere."

Light patters of rain above the cave system rung throughout High Camp. Distant thunder rolled in through the night without an announcement. Sersei felt her heart tug when she saw the boy sniffle more. The boy who grew to be a warrior without much of a choice, the one who was pushed into battle so soon.

She whispered again, just a final assurance. "I promise, Neteyam."

I promise.

That night, Sersei found herself wandering into the tent her father resided in. He was sorting through some of the cargo stolen from the train earlier that day. Her eyes flickered among the sleek boxes perched open, counting as she stood near the entrance silently.

She lightly cleared her throat and pursed her lips. "Um, Dad?" Her hands fidgeted with themselves in front of her, picking at her nails and the callouses from shooting arrows. Light fingers traveled up to smooth over the bruises around her wrists, which never seemed to go away after vigorous training.

Jake whipped his head around at the sudden voice, eyes widened at the sight of his eldest daughter. And for a moment, he saw Tommy's curious eyes staring back at him, opening up his soul and peeking inside. His brother always managed to know what he was thinking. "Yeah, babygirl?" He shook off the memory of Tommy.

Her figure stepped forward as Jake stood from his crouch on the floor. "Do you ever think, I dunno," Sersei scratched her head, feeling instant regret for putting herself in this position. Her father could take her words positively or negatively. "Don't you feel you're hard on us?"

"How so?" He furrowed his brows, despite knowing exactly what she was going to say.

The girl dropped her shoulders from its tense position and sighed. "We're trying to do our best, but it's not enough for you. All of this pressure is on us because of you. It's just pushing and pushing, and I'm worried Neteyam is getting hit pretty hard, especially after today."

"Neteyam?" Jake asked, brows lifted at the mention of his name. "What do you mean? Neteyam wasn't the one who brought you into danger, he didn't go against my orders, he's fine."

"That's what you think." Sersei's gaze hardened, eyes narrowed. "But he almost died today and you didn't even give him a second to breathe before going off on him. I'm getting sick of this." Pull your shit together, is what she would have said if it wasn't her father she was talking to.

Sersei was not one familiar with the cold war and bloodshed. She was not the one who grew up on Earth, who witnessed the destruction of a planet by simple neglect for so long. Jake was the one to see how cruel humanity was. He knew war long before, even as a Marine getting sent off to foreign countries.

He knew what it felt like to lose his legs, his mobility. It was like he lost a part of himself, his purpose, his entire career as a veteran. Jake knew people who were disabled and comfortable with their life, but he wasn't. Not because he saw his paralyzed legs as disgusting, no, he knew he could do more than sit on his ass and get into shitty bar fights. Jake knew his worth and he never let it go.

"He should realize war is real and he could get hurt. That is what battle is about, especially when it's with the Sky People. They don't care about us." The humans didn't care about the Na'vi. It was only about money, life, destruction of one home planet after another.

Sersei huffed and blinked back tears. "I know war is real. I know that so much, I live and breathe fighting, it's all I know now!" She raised her voice toward the end, flying her hands around to emphasize her point. She stalked closer to her father, looking up into his eyes and pointing a finger to his chest. "The Sky People will never let us live in peace and we cannot change that. But we can be kind to each other, we can help!"

Jake paused, face blank as he stared at Sersei. For a moment, she thought she did something wrong. Like she stepped out of line. "I'm- I'm sorry, Dad, I just-"

"Get out." His nostrils flared. "That is an order."

Sersei blinked and furrowed her brows in confusion. "What?"

"Go." Jake pointed to the entrance where she came from. "Now." An indescribable anger took over his features. His face matched the one he made when he fought ruthlessly. Never did Sersei think it would be directed at her.

"Okay," she whispered. "I'm- I'm sorry," she blinked back tears. She turned around and walked out at a fast pace. Her hands swiped away tears as soon as they fell, words bubbled up in her throat.

The sky cried cold rain as Sersei drifted to sleep with a mind full of thoughts.

this isn't the long chapter i was talking about that's the next one but hopefully we'll see sersei and ao'nung meet??? maybe??? idk