𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐬
𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐱

from the eyes of
— 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒 𝐉𝐀𝐃𝐄 —

I lay across two console chairs as the Doctor came speeding in with Amy hot on his heels. They had not been outside the TARDIS for long, I left them maybe a minute or two ago.

"PJ! Good, you're still out here—I thought I was going to need to find you! Now where should we go next, girls? The Elliptical galaxy? A star? Or how about Victorian London? Oh, I do love the Victorian ages!" He rambled as he leaped up the steps, spinning around the console

The TARDIS shuddered as he brought her into the Time Vortex.

Amy was quick to lean on the railings next to the chairs where I was relaxing.

"Considering how problematic the Victorian ages are, I find it concerning that you like it so much!" I remarked while closing my eyes.

When after a few seconds I heard no reply, I opened my eyes with furrowed brows. I jumped, sinking into the console chair further as I was greeted by the Doctor leaning over me, his face so close that our foreheads were centimeters away from touching.

"I don't think you have a place to be talking about problematic, deary," He informed me with a scowl. "Victorian London is great!"

I sat up, pushing him away by his face. The Doctor floundered, nearly losing his footing before he chose to crash into the now-open seat next to me.

"Victorian London sucks..." I breathed, blowing a stray strand of hair from my face. "Shouldn't we try to track down the Daleks that just got away?"

"Don't like the 40s, don't like the Victorian ages... you're very picky... very hard to please..." The Doctor complained, taking one of my braids between his fingers and playing with it. "And I don't go searching for the Daleks, dearest. Not to mention, I can't track them even if I wanted to with the way their ship jumped. But all of time and space: we'll eventually run into them again and I'll put a stop to them then..." He murmured the last part surely.

I rolled my eyes but didn't bother to stop him from playing with my hair.

"What about a planet then? I haven't been on a different planet yet, please let's go see a planet!" Amy begged from where she stood next to the Doctor.

His eyes lit up. "A planet, of course!" He exclaimed, dropping my hair and leaping to his feet.

I threw my head back with a sigh. "Food first?" I meekly asked having skipped breakfast earlier and then immediately needing to deal with Daleks all day.

Speaking of which, I was vaguely sure it was around time for Amy and I to go back to sleep. We'd been out nearly 10 hours, but the Doctor ran a busy schedule. He liked to be on the move constantly.

"Oh yeah, I'm quite hungry now that you mention it..." Amy agreed, stealing the seat the Doctor had previously been sitting in.

"Ah—food! Love food!" The Doctor turned with another smile. "Food it is and a planet! How about Braxtar's on Zulphatron? Great munchie-salad they have! Or better yet, a food moon! There's a lovely little one in the Andromeda Galaxy, orbiting a purple sun. Who doesn't love purple? And the cheese soufflés are to die for—though I'd recommend avoiding the lava pudding. It's... well, let's just say it's an acquired taste."

Braxtar's on Zulphatron was good. The munchie-salad that the Doctor mentioned was delicious, but Braxtar's mostly specializes in the planets local delicacies... which might be a bit alarming to someone like Amy who'd never eaten off-world before.

And... a food moon was more than a lot.

While the aspect was interesting to me, I had no doubt Amy might be spending an entire day in the bathroom if her first off-planet eating experience was from a food moon.

Amy groaned, smart enough to recognize the same thing. "Can't we just have something normal? Like chips or a sandwich? I'm not ready to risk alien food poisoning yet."

The Doctor looked genuinely offended. "Chips? A sandwich? Amelia Pond, we can go anywhere in all of time and space, and you want chips? That's like going to the Louvre and asking for a keegen on a napkin!"

"What does that mean?" Amy furrowed her brows in concern.

I elaborated with a wave. "It's like going to an all-you-can-eat buffet in Vegas and only getting the most basic thing there... like chicken or fries or something..." I told her, and she nodded.

The Doctor threw an arm toward me. "See!" He stressed.

I sat up straighter, shaking my head. "No, Doctor..." He frowned as I also shot him down. "I second Amy on this one. If you take us to a food moon or even Zulphatron for her first time eating off Earth, she will literally be bed and toilet-ridden for days. She needs to start small before working up to any cheesy space soufflés."

He sighed dramatically, spinning on his heels, but he knew I was right. "Fine, fine. You're right. You humans and your fragile constitutions." With a flick of his wrist, he pulled a lever that made the TARDIS lurch slightly, it quickly became apparent that we were now floating through space somewhere. "The kitchen it is! I suppose I'll just have to whip something up myself."

Amy and I exchanged skeptical glances.

I squinted at him. "Wait—you can cook?"

He looked offended, puffing out his chest indignantly. "Of course, I can cook! I'm brilliant at it. Depending on the ingredients. And the gravity. And whether or not the eggs are—"

"Yeah, we'll see about that," Amy interrupted, pushing herself up from the chair.

I followed after her, all three of us making our way into the corridors.

The Doctor was talking our ears off about how he won some cook-off somewhere on the planet Desinderium in the 16th century during his 6th generation. He was still holding onto that victory hard even though he was 527 when it happened, making it almost 400 years ago.

The TARDIS kitchen was, unsurprisingly, as eccentric as the rest of the ship. It was a cozy space with mismatched cupboards, a retro-looking fridge, and a table that appeared to hover slightly off the ground.

It was giving space-themed-60s.

It was slightly different from the first time I saw it. Not too different, but just slightly, it seemed the TARDIS was constantly changing herself.

I eyed a contraption in the corner that looked suspiciously like a toaster but had far too many blinking lights and antennae to be trustworthy.

The Doctor took his tweed jacket off, laying it on the back of a kitchen chair.

He rolled up his sleeves before rummaging through the fridge with the enthusiasm of a child digging through a toy chest. "Right, let's see... milk from the year 2150—still fresh! Bread from a bakery on Vega 6. And ooh, would you look at this! Jam from the moon of Tropica 9—glows in the dark, so you can find it during power outages."

He had splayed all the ingredients on the counter. The jam was in a clear jar and glowing a fierce orange.

I leaned against the counter, arms crossed. "Tropica 9 jam? Isn't it outlawed on three different planets? I'm starting to think this is going to end with Amy and me making our own sandwiches."

The Doctor turned, brandishing a whisk like a weapon. "No faith! It's fine for humans to consume! You two are lucky to have a chef of my caliber."

"But, of course," I deadpanned sarcastically.

The Doctor was acting as a contestant on a cooking show and began pulling more random ingredients from the fridge. "Right then! Scrambled eggs and French toast. Easy peasy. Can't go wrong!"

Amy and I shared a look from where we were leaning against the counter.

He dramatically started cracking eggs into a bowl. "Cooking is just science, you know. Ratios, heat transfer, the Maillard reaction—it's all terribly straightforward. I'm brilliant at it."

He finished cracking the eggs before dancing toward the suspicious-looking toaster bringing the bread with him. The Doctor then started shoving two at a time in it.

Was he supposed to—?

The toaster unexpectedly emitted a high-pitched whirr.

"Is it supposed to do that?" I asked, taking a cautious step back.

"Of course!" The Doctor replied, jabbing at one of its many buttons. "It's new! State-of-the-art. Self-toasting, self-cleaning, self-thinking!"

"That last one sounds ominous," Amy said, crossing her arms and I nodded in agreeance.

"It's fine. Perfectly safe." The Doctor waved us off, fiddling with a lever.

The toaster responded with a loud CLANK and launched a piece of bread into the air like a catapult. It soared across the room, smacked into the wall, and fell to the floor with a faint sizzle.

My mouth fell open at the sight.

"Whoa!" I ducked as another slice whizzed past my head, its edges charred black.

Amy doubled over. "It's attacking! Your toaster is attacking us!"

"It's not attacking!" The Doctor flailed at the toaster, which was now spitting out bread slices at an alarming rate. "It's just... enthusiastic! Stop that, you infernal contraption!"

Another slice flew, narrowly missing the Doctor's ear. He grabbed a spatula and swung at it like he was playing cricket.

Amy, still laughing, took charge. "Right, enough of this nonsense." She grabbed a frying pan from a nearby hook. "Let's do this the old-fashioned way."

The Doctor had finally managed to power the toaster off.

"Great idea," I said, diving toward the fridge. I rummaged around until I found some vegetables—tomatoes, peppers, and even a proper onion, miraculously un-glowing. "I'll chop. Amy, you cook. Doctor, maybe just... stay over there?"

"Excuse me?" He looked upset, pointing at himself. "I am a genius, thank you very much. I can handle my kitchen."

"Your toaster says otherwise," I shot back.

His expression shifted into a pout. "That toaster has a personality defect. Nothing to do with my skills."

"Sure, Doctor," Amy teased, sliding the frying pan onto the stovetop. "Now sit down before you cause another appliance meltdown."

Grumbling, the Doctor reluctantly perched on a stool, watching as Amy and I took over. She took the cracked eggs and dumped them into the pan with practiced ease, while I diced the vegetables with a speed that came from years of playing with sharp objects

"This is nice," Amy said after a few moments of silence as she stirred the eggs. "Reminds me of cooking with my aunt."

"Not exactly your usual kitchen though, is it?" I replied, tossing the chopped peppers into a bowl.

"Not complaining."

The Doctor, apparently unable to stay quiet for long, leaned forward. "You two are doing it wrong."

Amy shot him a glare. "If you even think about touching this pan, I will hit you with it."

He raised his hands in mock surrender, a mischievous grin on his face. "Just saying—needs a dash of salt, a pinch of pepper, maybe some paprika..."

"Doctor." My tone was a warning, though I couldn't help the smile tugging at my lips. "Let us handle this."

"Fine, fine," He said, leaning back dramatically. "I'll just sit here and twiddle my thumbs while you create your bland culinary... disaster."

"And by twiddling your thumbs, you mean critique every step we take?" I asked, arching an eyebrow at him.

"Exactly!"

Despite the Doctor's endless commentary and stories of his impressive cooking feats—we managed to pull the meal together. Amy plated the scrambled eggs and toast, while I garnished it with the veggies. It was simple, but after the day we'd had, it looked like the finest feast.

"Ta-da!" Amy declared, setting the plates down on the hovering table.

The Doctor inspected the food like it was a piece of alien technology. "Hmm. Not bad. Could use more flair, though. You should serve it on fire next time!"

I rolled my eyes, sliding into a chair. "Just eat, Doctor." I reached over, patting his cheek causing him to blink and look at me in surprise. "You certainly need it."

His smile was wiped away. "Oi! I'm rather fit, this new body nearly has abs hiding under these clothes!" He exclaimed.

Amy and I proceeded to stare at his midsection, but it was impossible to tell with his shirt on. I suppose it was possible for him to have almost-abs given his figure though.

"Having almost-abs isn't impressive. You're talking to a woman who has a fully developed and clearly defined six-pack..." I waved him off.

To my surprise, the Doctor gained a dopey smile, his gaze clashing against my own as he leaned slightly closer.

"Trust me, I know..." He sighed breathlessly.

It caused tingles to go racing up my spine and my cheeks to blush at the implication his words held. Who the fuck knows what he knew and had seen of me given he'd technically known me for a lot longer than I had known him.

Amy raised her brows, looking between us.

"You only know that because I told you both yesterday in Australia..."

The Doctor said nothing further, giving me one last long look with an expression I couldn't decipher.

"Spoilers..." He finally uttered, humming and ripping his gaze away from me while looking at his plate.

What the fuck did that mean?

Amy waggled her brows my way causing me to roll my eyes. Knowing the Doctor, he was just messing with me.

As we dug in, I asked a question that had been on my mind for some time.

"So how did you meet me, exactly? Well, the first time you met me and apparently the second time I'll meet you...?" My voice trailed, head tilting as I tried to word it correctly.

The Doctor chewed slowly, his green eyes flashing up to meet my own. He stared at me for a moment with a pondering expression before he swallowed his bite. His fork was then pointed toward me.

"We met during my tenth incarnation..." He answered easily, saying nothing further as he took another bite. "Bland, my darlings, this food is very bland but edible, I suppose..." He wrinkled his nose.

Amy looked at him with outrage but I ignored his goading.

"Well, yes, but how do we meet?" I stressed. "And how long does that mean I'll be traveling with this version of you? You also said the future version of me eventually leaves to meet up with the future version of you to correct our time flow... does that mean after I leave your past I come back to you now?" The floodgate had opened and I was asking questions that had been on my mind since the first hour I met him.

Confusing questions.

The Doctor was staring at me bemused and with another emotion I could not place my finger on. His lips were pulled up just slightly as he listened to me, eyes gleaming.

To my surprise, he did not cut off my questions—only leaned forward with every word that left my lips.

He snapped his fingers when I was finished. "Yes, to all of that..."

I remained confused. "What do you mean 'yes'?"

He looked smug, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. "I mean... yes..."

"Doctor!" I spat furiously, my voice bordering on a whine.

"Dear, obviously I can't tell you the details... especially this early on... when we get closer to the day you'll inevitably need to leave," He said that part sadly before he seemed to force himself to perk up. "...I'll tell you what I can and what you'll need to know. But until that moment, your future—my past—is stored as mostly lovely and cherished memories in both of my hearts," The Doctor proclaimed the last part with a goofy grin.

I huffed. "Huh... two hearts..."

"Two hearts, indeed," He confirmed and appeared as though he wanted to add something to it but bit his tongue.

Interesting.

▂ ✶ ▂ ✶ ▂ ✶ ▂ ✶ ▂

A small while later, after we'd finished eating and chatting some more, Amelia Pond and I found ourselves wandering the endless corridors of the infinite TARDIS with the Doctor hot on our heels. He was surprisingly quiet, wearing a gentle look as he followed after Amy and me, watching as we opened doors and wandered about with wonder in our gazes.

The Doctor's eyes lit up as he suddenly spoke. "The TARDIS is alive, you know. She shifts her halls and rooms. The layout changes. Sometimes she even hides things. She's got quite the sense of humor."

"Let's hope her sense of humor doesn't involve locking us in a broom cupboard," Amy quipped, peeking into a room that appeared to be full of oversized clocks. "What's this, then? A timekeeper's paradise?"

The Doctor leaned past her, hands tucked into his jacket pockets. "Ah, the Horologium Room. A record of every clock I've ever owned or encountered. Some of them even bite. Careful with the sundial—it's a bit territorial."

Amy snorted and closed the door quickly. "You're absolutely bonkers, you know that?"

"And yet, you love it," He shot back. "Why else would you follow a madman into a big blue box?"

"Boredom? Recklessness? Desperation?" I asked out loud, my eyes looking up toward the high ceilings that weren't really ceilings.

It looked like an endless floating abyss of murky grays and whites.

The Doctor quirked a brow. "So what are you?"

"All three..." I grinned back causing him to break into a hundred-watt look.

"Me too," He nudged me affectionately.

"You must be to wander the galaxies as a hippe-slash-vigilante..." I mentioned it in an off-hand manner.

His gaze was suddenly far away as he answered, wide green eyes wavering. "Or just incredibly lonely..." He murmured.

It was weird, he looked so old but so innocent at the same time. I had no doubt it was this young face with those big eyes that made him appear as such.

Amy looked at him sadly. I stared at him blankly—more than feel sad for him, I understood him. Sympathy grew in my soul, all of it directed at him.

Choosing to use that sympathy, I did my best to bring the mood back up which is what I know the Doctor wants.

"Or incredibly old," I reached up, patting his cheek.

His eyes snapped down to meet my own, a bemused expression taking over.

"Not that old..." He joked, managing to grab my hand before it fell from his face. "And I'm not a hippie!"

He momentarily stroked my hand in an oddly intimate manner. Even for him.

"Pretty old," I shrugged as he finally dropped my hand. "And the hippie thing is still to be determined."

We then turned a corner and stepped into a massive chamber that took my breath away. The walls stretched high into the distance, lined with ropes, beams, and platforms. It was a full-on ropes course, complete with swinging bridges, zip lines, and monkey bars.

On the other end was a gym with a full training area. That also caught my attention.

Amy let out a low whistle. "Okay, this is impressive. Why do you even have this?"

The Doctor grinned. "Exercise, of course! Well, that and the occasional team-building activity. A time traveler's got to stay sharp, after all."

I raised an eyebrow, scanning the course. "Looks more like an obstacle course for a ninja."

"Precisely!" He clapped his hands together, bouncing on his heels. "So, who's up for a bit of a challenge?"

"Are you sure you can handle that, old man?" I scoffed.

The Doctor stared down at me, his eyes suddenly burning with intensity as he stepped closer. He leaned down.

"Oh, I can more than handle this," He said smugly.

Amy groaned, shaking her head. "Not me. I'm not about to break my neck on one of those zip lines." She plopped herself onto a nearby bench. "But I'll happily watch you two make fools of yourselves."

I smirked, crossing my arms as I looked at the Doctor. "You really think you can keep up with me on this? I was practically raised on courses like these."

His grin turned mischievous, and he shrugged out of his tweed jacket and suspenders, rolling up his sleeves. "Oh, sweetheart, you underestimate me. I've got two hearts and centuries of experience. As humanity says: you're about to get schooled."

Shivers raced down my spine as I looked away, desperately trying not to turn his words into other implications.

"Right. Loser buys the next meal we eat," I countered, stepping forward and testing the first rope bridge. "And if you lose, you're taking me to see Sabrina Carpenter live..."

"Sabrina—?" He trailed off before his eyes lit up in realization. "Oh yes, you are coming from 2025, of course, you'd want to see her. Deal," he smiled excitedly, stepping onto the course beside me. "I hope you like pizza from the 31st century. It has the best cheese in the galaxy."

Amy laughed and leaned back. "This is going to be amazing. Try not to die, yeah?"

The Doctor and I exchanged competitive glances, he adjusted his bowtie before he dramatically counted down, "Three... two... one... GO!"

We both launched ourselves onto the course, the ropes swaying wildly beneath our feet.

The rope bridge teetered precariously as I darted across it, the wooden planks creaking under my weight.

Balance comes easier with speed, move like the wind.

I glanced back over my shoulder to see the Doctor trailing behind, his gangly limbs flailing slightly as he tried to keep his balance.

"Come on, old man!" I called, grinning. "I thought TimeLords are supposed to be agile. Did you leave your coordination in your last regeneration?"

He puffed up indignantly, skipping two planks at once to catch up. "Oi! I'll have you know I was a champion at Gallifreyan gymkhana!"

"Gallifreyan what-now?" I teased, leaping onto the next platform and grabbing a rope to swing across a gap.

There was scary-looking spikes below and I wondered why the Doctor had such a dangerous ropes course in the TARDIS.

"Think decathlon but with more existential dread," He quipped, landing behind me with an unexpected amount of grace.

Amy's voice echoed from below. "Doctor! You look like you're barely holding it together!"

"Ignore her," The Doctor huffed, climbing a vertical net with surprising speed. "She's just jealous of my raw athleticism."

"Raw is the right word," I said, pulling myself onto a high beam and crouching to keep my balance. "You're one misstep away from landing flat on your face."

I will never admit it out loud, but the fact that he's doing this in those boots is kind of impressive.

"And yet, still ahead of you," He shot back smugly, shimmying along the beam with a confidence that startled me.

I narrowed my eyes, refusing to let him win that easily. With a quick burst of speed bordering the line of non-human, I darted across the beam, hopping to a series of hanging rings that swayed with every movement.

Perfect. There is a reason my arms have such muscle and definition.

Leaping forward and grabbing a ring, I easily propelled myself continuously, my arm strength not failing.

The Doctor followed, his long arms swinging in a surprisingly fluid motion. "You know, deary," He called, slightly out of breath, "if you spent less time showing off, you might actually stand a chance of beating me."

"Oh, is that so?" I retorted, releasing one ring and twisting midair to grab the next. "What's your excuse going to be when I leave you in the dust?"

"My excuse is I'm letting you win—obviously," He replied, landing awkwardly on a platform ahead. "I'm a gentleman, after all."

Amy groaned from below. "Doctor, you're about as much of a gentleman as a soggy biscuit!"

I snorted, using his momentary distraction to close the gap. We were neck and neck as we approached the final stretch: a zip line that led straight to the finish.

The Doctor grabbed the zip line handle and turned to me, his grin nearly wicked. "Well, sweetheart, this is where I say au revoir!"

"Don't you dare!" I lunged forward, grabbing the second zip line handle just as he launched himself off the edge.

The rush of wind whipped my hair back as we zipped side by side. The Doctor's face was a mix of concentration and glee.

"Eat my dust!" He yelled, leaning forward to gain speed.

"In your dreams, Space Lord!" I countered, using my weight to pick up momentum.

It was neck and neck as we hurtled toward the finish platform. At the last possible second, I twisted my body and landed with a triumphant thud just half a second before the Doctor.

"Ha!" I cried, pumping my fist in victory. "That's how it's done!"

The Doctor stumbled off the zip line, his floppy hair a windswept mess. "You cheated!"

"Did not," I said smugly, brushing off my hands. "I just happen to be better, faster, and clearly smarter."

"Smarter? Smarter?!" He looked at Amy. "Amy, did you see that? Tell her I'm smarter."

Amy shook her head, wiping her face. "Sorry, Doctor. I am starting to doubt the truth in your words, PJ gives you a real run for your money."

He threw his hands up in mock defeat, muttering something about unfair odds and recalibrating the course for "time-traveling physics."

"Don't be a sore loser," I said, clapping him on the shoulder. "But I will take my victory Sabrina Carpenter concert."

He sighed dramatically, but his grin gave him away. "Fine, I'll look into it. But next time, we're doing something I'm guaranteed to win. Trivia, perhaps. Or quantum Sudoku."

"First of all, playing something you're guaranteed to win is definitely cheating..." I said as we managed our way down the ropes course and headed toward the exit. "But whatever, bring it on, Doc."

Amy met us halfway there. "Remind me who this Sabrina girl is again?"

I answered immediately, eyes thoughtful. "If you're coming from the year 2010... then Sabrina Carpenter doesn't become super big for like 15 years. Imagine Britney Spears meets Kesha and they have a perfect child who is just all-around feminine and gorgeous..." I sighed dreamily. "I've tried all of her Juno positions..." I added happily.

Amy had been slowly nodding, following along before the last part. "Her what? What's that?"

The Doctor chose to pipe up at that moment. "Yes, what!?" He blushed brightly, a frown on his face. "With who? When—where?!" He demanded almost angrily.

His reaction certainly took me aback.

The Doctor was staring at me in an upset manner, his face turning red as he kept fumbling his bowtie. It seemed fidgeting with his bowtie was an unintentional habit of his.

Confusion ate away at me; it was soon replaced by irritation. It was no secret that the Doctor is rather controlling as can be seen from the many examples that have already happened in the short time I've been with him.

He was old though, and pride comes age with age. Pride and bossiness, which as great and kind and wonderful as the Doctor was, he still displayed heavily.

However, he was the last of the TimeLords and pushing just over 900 years in age; he had earned the right to display such bossiness and pride.

Through my irritation I pondered his question—when was the last time I performed a 'Juno' pose?

I nearly snorted out loud when I thought about it.

There was no way I was about to tell him about the night I spent with the hot and older Scottish gentleman named John.

There were quite a few other times I had engaged in such activities. I was over 300 years old and bouncing around the multiverse playing the ultimate game of the cosmos. And, to be frank—not to sound like a total douche—but I'm also pretty fucking hot.

Of course, this pussy had mileage. With both men and women.

However, a few of those times were not by choice, most of the ones were either terrible or meh. Good, let alone amazing sex, was the rarest and occurred far and few between.

John happened to hold a spot on my list of amazing lovers. Like... seriously... that man had been beyond words in the sheets.

Santa Claus certainly had brought me a great gift that night.

But I wasn't about to tell the Doctor that!

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Is what came from my mouth in a long sarcastic drawl.

The Doctor appeared almost beside himself, eyes darting back and forth between me and Amy. Amy quirked a brow.

"What's the problem, raggedy man? So does mine—" Her words were cut off by the Doctor gagging.

"Oi, don't say that. It's just gross and wrong coming from you!" He breathed.

Amy looked more than offended.

"Excuse me?" She scowled.

"You were a little girl when I met you," He shook his head. "I don't want to think about that."

"Yeah, and? I am not a little girl anymore!"

"As can be seen, Pond, as can be seen," The Doctor sighed before addressing me. "But you..." He clicked his tongue. "As my intern, I can no longer condone you having any romantic relationships with others..."

I blinked and rolled at him confusedly. "Uhm, why?" I asked, confusion evident in my tone.

I can't say I cared much because I had never been looking for such a thing in the first place. Not to mention if I ever really wanted to hook up with someone, it's not like I can't sneak it past the Doctor.

But during this portion of my long existence—I really can't say that I am keen to get with anyone like that.

"Because..." The Doctor seemed to be looking for any reason. "Because it's not professional...!"

I clicked my tongue and slowly nodded. "Not that this job seems very professional, but okay, that has been noted..." I scoffed in an amused manner.

It was obvious that this might be coming from jealousy, but I truly don't want to consider why the hell this guy might be jealous. The answer was staring me right in the face, but I refused to acknowledge it.

Because there is just no way my future self would be that much of an idiot. No way.

"No way! No super spectacular space romance because it's not professional in your eyes?" Amy sneered, crossing her arms. "There is no way! You can't do that!"

The Doctor shook his head. "My TARDIS, my adventures, my rules. Our adventures are for fun and running and adrenaline... not kissy action..." He shook his head in disgust in the end, although for a brief moment, there was a flash of something in his gaze.

Yep, ignoring that.

Amy let out an exasperated groan, throwing her hands up. "Oh, come on, Doctor! No kissy action?" She sounded dubious. "Don't think I haven't noticed you blushing every time PJ gives you one of those looks." Now, those words took me by surprise.

My eyebrows shot up as I choked on my breath. I don't give him any looks!

The Doctor turned a bright shade of red. "I don't blush! TimeLords don't blush. That's... that's a human-y thing."

Nevertheless, despite his words, he was blushing very brightly. It was actually really funny.

I smirked, crossing my arms and leaning against the nearest wall. "Oh really? So your face just turns that shade of tomato by accident?"

"It's genetic!" He sputtered. "And don't call me a tomato."

"Okay, cucumber," I fired back, grinning.

Amy burst snickered. "Cucumber! Face it, Doctor, you're losing on all fronts tonight."

He straightened his bowtie indignantly, muttering, "You two are insufferable."

I gave Amy a knowing look. "We wear it like a badge of honor."

"And speaking of badges," She added, smirking at me, "What's this about Juno poses? Are we talking yoga, gymnastics, or something else?"

I raised an eyebrow, amused. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"No!" The Doctor interjected, waving his hands wildly. "No one would like to know. It's not relevant. Let's just—"

"Sounds to me like you do want to know," Amy teased, shooting him a devilish grin.

He groaned, dragging a hand down his face. "Can't we focus on something more wholesome? Like, I don't know, the incredible design of this ropes course?"

"Nice try, Doc," I said, stepping closer and tilting my head. "But I'm starting to think there's more to this whole 'no space romance' rule than you're letting on. Care to share?"

"There's nothing to share!" He declared a little too loudly, turning on his heel and storming toward the exit. "Now, if you're quite done, let's move on!"

"Oh, he's so wound up," Amy murmured. "He's kind of easy to wind up with this stuff, isn't he?"

"Like a cog," I agreed, following after him. "He'd probably explode if you wound him any tighter."

We caught up with the Doctor in a corridor lined with glowing teal lights that pulsed gently with the hum of the TARDIS. He was staring at the wall, fiddling with his bowtie, but when he saw us, he plastered on an exaggerated smile.

"Right, then!" He said brightly, clapping his hands. "How about a tour of the TARDIS pool now? Heated, self-cleaning, and located conveniently next to the library. It's the pinnacle of sophistication."

"You're avoiding the question," Amy said, smirking.

"No, I'm redirecting the conversation. It's called multi-tasking, something that I am rather talented at." He waved us forward, practically bouncing on his feet. "Come along, girls!"

I sighed, shaking my head but letting it slide. "Fine. Lead the way, cucumber."

Amy giggled. "That's the funniest thing I think you've called him yet."

"Why do I travel with humans?" The Doctor muttered, though there was no real bite in his voice.

We wandered through the winding corridors, the Doctor pointing out random rooms as we passed: a wardrobe filled with clothes from every era, a greenhouse with gravity-defying plants, and a room he only referred to as "the Big Blue Button Room," which he warned us never to touch under any circumstances.

Noted for later exploration when the Doctor is distracted.

Finally, we came to the fabled library with a pool in it. Amy gasped, running ahead to take in the sight of towering bookshelves that seemed to stretch into infinity, the warm glow of old lamps casting a cozy light over everything. The pool, sparkling and impossibly blue, was nestled in the center of the room, its edge lined with ornate tiles that shimmered in the light.

"This is... amazing," Amy said, spinning around with wide eyes. "I feel like I'm in one of those old movies where the rich people have secret libraries."

"It's my pride and joy," The Doctor said, his voice soft with genuine affection. "Every book you could ever imagine, every story that's ever been told, right here."

I wandered over to one of the shelves, running my fingers along the spines of books with titles in languages I couldn't even begin to decipher. "How do you even keep track of all this?"

"Who says I do?" The Doctor replied with a grin. "Half the fun is stumbling upon something you didn't know you were looking for." 

Ignoring the weird look he's throwing my way.

Amy kicked off her shoes and dipped her toes into the pool, sighing contentedly. "I don't think I'm ever leaving this room."

"Don't get too comfortable, Pond," the Doctor said. "We've got places to go to."

I quirked an eyebrow. "Where to next then?"

"Well," He began, pacing along the edge of the pool, "there's a fascinating nebula I've been meaning to check out. Or we could visit the ice markets of Isodonic. Very slippery but fantastic hot cocoa."

Amy perked up. "Ooh, I vote for cocoa."

"Seconded," I said, plopping down on one of the plush chairs by the pool. "But maybe after some rest. This champion needs beauty sleep."

If no one else was going to call it then I would. If I really wanted to, I could stay up for days, similar to the Doctor. But sleeping was nice, and it was more beneficial.

"Champion?" The Doctor scoffed sourly. "Barely."

"Keep telling yourself that, cucumber," I replied.

Amy laughed, pulling a fluffy towel from a nearby rack. "Alright, then. Cocoa after sleep. It's a plan."

The Doctor paused, looking at the two of us with a soft smile. "Sounds perfect."

For a moment, we sat in companionable silence, the hum of the TARDIS surrounding us like a warm blanket. The Doctor, ever the restless one, eventually broke the quiet.

"Right, then. I'll plot a course for Isodonic while you two get some rest. But don't take too long. The universe doesn't wait." He told us while beginning to walk backward, face turning into a smug smile.

Amy rolled her eyes. "Goodnight, Doctor."

"Goodnight, Pond. Goodnight, dearest."

As he disappeared down the corridor, Amy turned to me with a smirk. "Cucumber. That's hilarious..."

"I know," I said, leaning back in my chair. "It suits him."