𝐃𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨: canuckboiontour  

𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨: 𝘊𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘉𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥, 𝘎𝘰𝘳𝘦, 𝘓𝘎𝘉𝘛𝘘+

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

It's been weeks- No- months since RaeHwan debuted as a soloist. After he left his company, we realized that it would be our only opportunity to start dating. It was only months after, though, that he became so busy after meeting up with his friend. This was roughly the time he came back from the military I think. Him and his friend would always share secret conversations of a "new project undergo" that was going to shock me.

He was right.

Life was great. When I found out about the creation of The Faker Club Entertainment, I was thrilled to hear he'd debut as a soloist under his own company. Not even thrilled- I was over the moon with excitement for him! However, the company that he created only led to problems in our relationship.

First, he became extremely busy. Writing music, recording songs, producing albums, and managing the company finances. He skipped meals, lacked sleep, and now here we are: We're barely speaking. I can't recall the last time I saw him smile. The last time we had a conversation.

It's been awful.

"Yah! Y/N, are you alright?" My boyfriend asked as he walked into the kitchen for the first time in days. I rolled my eyes subtly. "So now you remember me?" I thought to myself, clenching my fists with annoyance. Still, I gave him a warm smile.

"Don't worry about me! How are you? Have you eaten?" I interrogated, my voice sounding more worried by the second. He nodded non-nonchalantly to my questions.

"Hmm?" I said out of surprise. This is new, he usually doesn't eat anything until around late afternoon because he's so busy. Maybe he's noticed his unhealthy dietary patterns? "When?" I continued to ask.

He shrugged, proceeding to the sink to fill an empty glass that resided in his hand. "Yeah, my friend wanted to meet up for lunch."

Suddenly, his statement sounded so familiar. Too familiar. Has he said this to me before? I scrolled through a long list of memories in my brain, trying my best to recollect any such memory of it. Once the memory hit me, my face lit up- just not in a good way.

"Oh..." My voice sank. "Is it the same friend from two weeks ago?"

I must've caught him in a difficult spot because he froze before he put the full glass of water to his lips to take a sip. I caught him mid-action. Did I say something wrong? His gaze which was one me for a second looked away as he answered, brushing off my question in a tense manner.

"Yeah." He spoke flatly. I sighed as his voice piped up again, still sounding drier than dust in the Sahara Desert. "I'm going to sleep. Goodnight." I nodded as he exited the room, grabbing a pill bottle on the way out. Did I really upset him that bad? Those looked like his sleeping pills, and he only uses them when we get into an argument.

The first time we ever fought was for the dumbest reason: how much we liked each other. We fought about how there was 'no way I could love him more than he loved me'. Cliche, right? It lasted for two days before we made up. That night, he took sleeping pills because he said he couldn't sleep with the guilt of me being unhappy and us fighting with each other. For such a small thing, it got really heated real quick. I guess that's what made me love him more... his passion.

Now we were stuck in this position. The first time we fought, we resolved it after I brought him lunch and we promised to never fight over something like that ever again. Maybe this time, if I bring him his lunch like the old times, it'll end well as well?

I got up hastily from the chair I was sitting on, quickly making my way towards the fridge. Looking around for a bit, I contemplated what food I should make him for lunch tomorrow. Hmmm... Tteokbokki! I grabbed the ingredients, and set them down on the counter. A twisted smile appeared on my face; a mix of mischievous and delight coded my visage. Despite my expression, my heart still had an aching feeling, almost as if my heartbeat was lagging behind and crying every beat.

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

I stepped out of the car, in one hand was my phone, and in the other, RaeHwan's lunch. Making sure to host a sincere smile, I took a few deep breaths before walking into the building of his company. First person I was greeted by was Na Ung-Jae, or in other words, Hello Gloom. He was a close friend and the co-owner of The Faker Club with RaeHwan and Sulju, another one of their friends.

"Annyeonghaseyo! What brings you here?" Ung-Jae inquired. I smiled, holding up the lunch box higher so he could see it.

"I made food for RaeHwan in case he felt hungry. I've been awfully worried lately..." my voice unintentionally trailed off. Ung-Jae didn't seem very phased. If anything, he looked a little... uncomfortable, if that's the right word? Worry glistened in his eyes as he looked around the room, the back at me.

"I-I'm sorry Y/N... I think he already left for lunch. If you want, you can leave it here and I'll give it to him when he comes back?" Ung-Jae considerately offered, trying his best to form a smile on his lips. I looked around, my heart sinking a little deeper with every passing second. "Oh... no... It's okay. I'll just leave then... thank you," I responded, my clutch on the lunch box tightened with anguish.

Turning around now, I prepared myself to leave. However, a thought in the back of my mind stopped me. I froze in my tracks, soon turning back around to face Ung-Jae, who was surprisingly still there. Had he just stood there to watch me leave? "Hey... Ung-Jae?" I made sure to get his attention so I knew he wasn't just staring off into space.

"Hmm?" I answered.

I sighed before speaking. "By any chance... Do you know where RaeHwan went? Or who he went with?"

Ung-Jae cleared his throat. Seconds passed in silence, Ung-Jae lifted his hand to rub the back of his neck. He seemed nervous now, as if something big had happened and I wasn't supposed to find out. It took a little more than a few minutes, but eventually Ung-Jae gave in and told me.

"He's at Weol Cafe. That's all the information I know,"

He was lying. I could sense it. Still, I moved on, thanking him, then left.

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

I pulled up to the back parking lot of the cafe very cautiously. I didn't even need to get out of the car because both RaeHwan and Sulju were sitting outside. Both of them were smiling... RaeHwan was smiling..

...Without me...

My heart thumped harshly in my chest, but I disobeyed its cries and continued to watch them.

"It's just two colleagues having lunch, it's nothing bad. You're just jealous, they're just friends." I kept lying to myself. That's when it happened. I froze, holding my breath. My eyes widened as I witnessed RaeHwan lean over. The sound of my heart beating turned into a violent, unstable pounding in a matter of mili-seconds as his lips met hers.

Without wasting any more time, I grabbed my phone to snap a pic of him in the act. Proof. I didn't send it, though. Clicking on his contact, my fingers flew from letter to letter on the screen as if dancing angrily. Tears began to flood my vision causing me to misspell too much. I didn't even think twice, impulsive hitting send. Then, I stopped on the image, sending that to him as well. It'd take a few minutes to go through anyway.

"This can't be happening! This can't be happening God dammit!" I mentally cursed at myself. What did I do to deserve this? All I did was love and support him... I thought I was enough but clearly not. Was it because I'm Non-Binary? Did he want a classic, feminine woman over me? A girl who's comfortable identifying as the gender she was assigned? Was this God's way of smiting me for being LGBT+!?

My hands made their way to the keys, twisting it in the ignition before taking off out of the parking lot.

Mistake Number One: Never neglect the duties of whatever rule you play. He screwed up.

Mistake Number Two: If someone doesn't show affection to you, don't show it to them. Don't give your heart away so easily, Y/N!

Mistake Number Three: Don't drive with tears clouding up your vision. Crap.

Cars honked at me as the car swayed side to side. Because of my crying, I couldn't see where I was going. All the lights seemed blurred, the world felt as if it was getting darker. Suddenly, the feeling of my car hitting something made the vehicle stop in its tracks, the airbag blowing up as a reaction. The sound of the crashing didn't register until later. Something warm dripped in my ears. Trying to lift my weak limbs, I moved my hand to my ear as an attempt to see what the strange painful sensations in my ears and whole body were coming from. I looked at my hand. Red. Warm. Blood.

My vision flickers between darkness and a blurry, tinted red lens for a minute. Then it ceased. Pain spread throughout my body, taking over as it closed my eyes for me.

"Help... " I tried to mutter. I already knew though... It's too late for me now. Silently, I accepted my pain, closing my eyes for the last time. A final breath escaped my lips. Goodbye, World.  

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

RaeHwan coughed as he stared at Y/N's text message. It looked like gibberish without context, misspelled words and typos deformed the text, reducing the mental grasp of everyone who dared to read it. Everyone except for RaeHwan. Just as he was about to finish trying to make sense of the last sentence, a wave of resentment washed over him. It wasn't resentment towards Y/N though- it was towards himself. His eyes outlined the context of the photo.

It was about kissing Sulju.

A scoff left his mouth. "So she's been stalking me?" The devil on his shoulder questioned him. RaeHwan shook his head at the little hallucination. "No," he said out loud. "She's been worried about me."

An hour had already passed since that photo was taken. RaeHwan sat in his studio, staring down at the phone. Hesitatingly, he typed out a response, and sent it only for it to be left unread.

RaeHwan: I understand if you're upset, but can we please talk for a minute?

All Y/N wanted was to talk it out. Little did RaeHwan know, however, that she wouldn't be able to. As if perfect timing, his phone rang. Although it was unknown, the hopeful man still picked up, praying it would be his Y/N on the other side. He was gravely mistaken.

"Is this Kim RaeHwan?" A man's voice said from the other side. The idol continued to hesitate like he did before, debating whether or not he should answer. In the end, he gave in and did.

"Yes, this is he,"

"We are calling on the behalf of Y/F/N to inform you that Y/N is currently at From20 Hospital. At 4:28 P.M. Today, they were declared dead, cause of death being severe injuries due to a car accident. It states here that you are the closest relative to them, I'm so sorry for your loss, Sir,"

The world froze around RaeHwan. He dropped to his knees, his phone slipping out of his hand as he did so. Now it all made sense to him: the message, the picture, the accident. His heart dropped, his breath being heavier. Tears escaped the eyes of the man as he thought to himself.

"I deserve to die." 

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙨𝙤 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩! 𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙪𝙮𝙨, 𝙄 𝙝𝙤𝙥𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙚𝙣𝙟𝙤𝙮𝙚𝙙, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙮 𝙨𝙖𝙛𝙚! ♡

𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 2050  𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴