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𝑺𝑰𝑳𝑬𝑵𝑻 𝑺𝑪𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑴𝑺
chapter three

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✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦
｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ
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꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
‿︵‿︵‿୨ ୧‿︵‿︵‿

➥　  ⁺　  ₊　 ✿

( 𝘛𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘨𝘴 𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘥𝘦 )

When I was eleven, I had taken up the mission to climb every single tree I could find. I couldn't tell you why. Only that my eleven year old brain was determined to be an expert in tree climbing. I remember one afternoon I was sat in a hide on a tree, grinning from ear to ear as I heard my brother call out for me from so far away. We were playing hide and seek in the forest area by our home. Apparently my brother had taken so long to find me that I had started to doze off and fell right out of the tree, landing on my back. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't inhale or exhale and I felt as if I'd faint.

The feeling I felt now was worst. It took my mind a second to process. To understand what my eyes saw in front of me. His gaze stood shocked and his face formed into pure joy at the sight of me and my family. I saw a sob rip through his throat and a hand come up to cover it.

"Dad!" My brother screamed, ripping himself from our mother's arms and running over to our father. Mom chased after him and attempted to grab his arm to slow his pace. I watched dad throw his arms around Carl and take him into his embrace, holding him as if for the first time.

I screamed for my legs to move. But it was as if they'd been cemented in the ground unable to move even if I commanded it. Mom joined their embrace and I watched one of dads arms come up to wrap around her shoulders. I heard their sobs and cries of relief. Again I screamed. Why wasn't I moving? Why wasn't I crying?

I felt a shift in my body when dad's soft blue eyes that always made me open up like a waterspout locked onto mine. That was when my legs took off in a spirt. I crashed in between my brother and mothers backs and wrapped my arms around them both. I felt dad's strong grip take hold on the back of my head and his fingers move between the locks, underneath my tied up hair.

At some point mom removed herself from the embrace allowing dad to hold both me and Carl fully. My cheek pressed into the tan fabric of his officer uniform as I smelt his scent.

Dad never had a specific smell but it smelt like him. I felt tears track down my cheeks and my hand reach up to grab hold of his shoulder, squeezing the fabric. Mom's hand run up and down my back and dad's face was in my hair, doing the same thing I was doing to him.

I wasn't sure how long we were stood there or how many eyes were on us but I didn't care. For the first time in weeks I had allowed myself to cry. To actually express my emotions without a coverup. Dad always had that effect on me. For weeks my mind has been fooling itself to replace dad with Shane making Shane the one I turned too. But I never cried with Shane. I use to cry for mom. But I always cried for dad.

Soon mom joined back in the embrace and I felt my lips turn into a soft and accepting smile. For a moment I allowed myself to forget the fallen state of our world. Forget the loss of our home and the fear that gripped our lives. I only allowed myself to focus on the heartbeat that I never thought would beat again.

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"Disoriented. I guess that comes closest. Disoriented. Fear, confusion... all those things but... Disoriented comes closest." Dad began speaking under the darken night sky, staring into the amber flames of the fire. My head laid on the padding of his left shoulder and my mother laid on his right. Both his arms were wrapped around us, his fingers rubbing our arms while my brother sat in his lap. Occasionally my father's hand would reach around to rub the top of my brother's mud brown hair.

"Words can be meager things. Sometimes they fall short." Dales wise voice spoke from the lawn chair in which he sat on. My eyes remained down eyeing the piece of my father's shirt I had in my hand.

"I felt like I'd been ripped out of my life and put somewhere else. For a while I thought I was trapped in some coma dream, something I might not wake up from ever." Dad confessed, his eyes looking only at the flames of our fire. For the first time since I laid eyes on my father I thought about how he must have felt. Waking up not knowing where you are, in a world you knew nothing about. I watched the world fall apart in real time while dad woke up in it. He woke up not having a clue as to what happened. My grip tighten on the shirt.

"Mom said you died." Carls little voice spoke up. I let my gaze shift from the material of my father's shirt to him, my eyes sharping. However the him was not my brother but Shane. They weren't sharpen with accusation but rather curiosity. My uncle had not at all looked as relieved as I thought he'd be and even looked nervous. He was the one who had told us of dad's death. That when he felt for a heartbeat he couldn't find one. But by some miracle dad came back to life. Maybe a doctor stayed in the hospital and helped keep him alive? Maybe Shane felt it wrong and there was a heart beat all along.

Shane looked somewhat uneasy. He was looking at dad while twisting his fingers, a move i knew him to do when nervous. His eyes locked with mine and he gave a half grin that didn't meet his eyes. I returned it.

"She had every reason to believe that. Don't you ever doubt it." Dad soft stern voice spoke drawing me back just as my brother nodded. I felt myself relax from the tension I didn't notice had overcome my body.

"When things started to get really bad, they told me at the hospital that they were gonna medevac you and the other patients to Atlanta, and it never happened." Mom explained looking at dad with soft eyes. Mom looked more relaxed and at ease for the first time since dad's accident. We all were. Although we all still felt uneasy about our world, knowing dad was here somewhat grounded us all and made us feel as safe as we could feel.

However under that blanket of relief in her expression I could see something else in my mother. It looked almost like covered up guilt. I've always been told I'm good at reading people. At reading their facial expressions and body language.

I wasn't sure why I saw guilt. Maybe it was about thinking dad was dead this whole time and not going to the hospital to see if it was true. But how could we have when the city was completely overrun and we would have lost our lives anyway? 

"Well, I'm not surprised after Atlanta fell - and from the look of that hospital, it got overrun." Dad explained giving mom a look of understanding.

"Yeah, looks don't deceive. I barely got them out, you know?" I heard Shane say with a half shrug gesturing to me, my brother and mom. I felt myself tense at the sentence. That was odd considering I agreed with him. He had saved my family in the outburst of the fall and gotten us safely to the camp we'd called home the last six weeks.

"I can't tell you how grateful I am to you, Shane. I can't begin to express it." Dad said and I felt the arm around my shoulders pull me in more. I gave a light grin at his words and leaned my head more against his shoulder settling down sightly. I too had no words to explain how grateful I was to the universe for bringing my dad back. I began thanking every god who'd listen for giving him back, for making my family whole again.

Our little group fell into an assorted silence all around the fire, all of us seemingly not knowing what to say. A cold breeze blew through my hair and I pulled dad's jacket tighter around me. Dad had smiled widely when he first saw me put it on and when I offered to give it back, he shook his head with a smile and said it looked better on me, which made me smile. I knew it wasn't true given it was twice my size and made me look like a kid playing dress up but I kept it anyways.

"There go those words falling short again. Paltry things." Dale spoke up breaking our long standing silence, a few people let out dry chuckles while some let small smiles break our lips.

In the corner of my eye I saw an ember flame pick up in light.

"Hey, Ed." Shane called over to the small campfire that was started a few meters away from ours . "You want to rethink that log?" He advised watching the man take a seat on a log opposite his wife and daughter. Ed Peletier was an aging man with grey hair and bold features.

He was a boorish, surly man who'd I'd never spoken to but he never gave me an easy feeling. Ed had never shared our fire always insisting that his family make their own despite the countless times they'd been invited over. The man was the dominant type and clearly had a tight grip on his family. I hated seeing it. Carol was a nice woman who I really like. And we all knew he was abusive.

Although I'd never seen it, the way the man acts especially around his family gave all of us the strong feeling he hurts them. But none of us had ever seen it and didn't know what to do about it. Which I hated even more.

Ed scoffed at Shane, looking into the glowing flames of his fire.

"It's cold, man." He argued not caring about the repercussions that log may cause.

"The cold don't change the rules, does it? Keep our fires low, just embers so we can't be seen from a distance, right?" Shane recited one of the few rules we had in our group.

"I said it's cold! You should mind your own business for once!" Ed's aggressive tone rang out. I watched Sophia jump and Carol flinch. Shane stood up from his spot around the fire and rounded our circle to make his way over to Ed. I couldn't hear what they were saying and Ed looked mad. After a few moments I watched him kick the log out of the fire.

"Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon?" Dale asked after Shane had returned to our circle.

"He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind." Dale reminded us causing some people around the camp to grow a shade a white. Daryl had left about a day ago saying he was going on a run for supplies. Of course these would be supplies I would never see. Daryl and his brother Merle kept to themselves and the only thing we shared was a camp ground. They were intimidating men and looked like the redneck type.

"I'll tell him. I dropped the key. It's on me." T-Dogs guilty voice filled the cold air. I knew they felt bad. Bad for leaving Merle like that. I felt guilty too. I know I wasn't there and even if I was I couldn't possibly do anything to change what had happened but still. Knowing a human life was left in danger and I was safe just didn't sit right with me.

"I cuffed him. That makes it mine." Dad spoke up.

"Guys, it's not a competition." Glenn's annoyed voice said and I would have almost laughed if the situation was different. Glenn shrugged his shoulders looking from T- Dog to dad with a hesitant look.

"I don't mean to bring race into this, but it might sound better coming from a white guy."
Glenn said. I didn't know how to feel about that and nobody really did as none said anything. T- Dog suddenly looked frustrated and his hands clenched into fists.

"I did what I did! Hell if I'm gonna hide from him!" T-Dog spoke with passion clearly frustrated with everyone being worried about Daryl and what he might do. I knew T-Dog was just as scared as the rest of us but I didn't say anything.

"We could lie." Amy hesitantly suggested shrugging her shoulders from her sister's side. That wasn't a half bad idea. People died in this world everyday. Telling Daryl his brother didn't make it and got attacked by one of those geeks on their way out could be our best bet. The last thing I wanted was Daryl trying to kill both T-Dog and dad.

"Or tell the truth." Andrea suggested. That caused me to feel bad about wanting to lie.

"Merle was out of control."Andrea said that we all already knew. I watched her turn to mom and give a soft look.

"Something had to be done or he'd have gotten us killed. Your husband did what was necessary. And if Merle got left behind, it is nobody's fault but Merle's." Andrea said justifying my father's actions and how he saved the group. I felt a smile touch my lips at my dad being the hero. I always felt pride when I heard of a good deed my father had done. He was always someone I viewed as a hero and hearing him save the group only supported my view.

"And that's what we tell Daryl?" Dale concluded giving everyone a firm nod, like a parent telling their child what to do. "I don't see a rational discussion to be had from that, do you? Word to the wise... We're gonna have our hands full when he gets back from his hunt." Dale spoke with a sight tone of nervousness that made a shiver go up my spine. I was scared even if we lied to Daryl that he would lash out and hurt us.

"I was scared and I ran.... i'm not ashamed of it." T-Dog admitted to us but his face told a different story.

"We were all scared. We all ran. What's your point?" Andrea asked, her eye brows down in confusion on T-Dogs words.

"I stopped long enough to chain that door." T-Dog admitted looking down in regret. I felt a pull in my chest at the words and my hand stopped moving along dad's shirt.

"Staircase is narrow. Maybe half a dozen geeks can squeeze against it at any one time. It's not enough to break through that... Not that chain, not that padlock." T-Dog explained, playing with his fingers. "– My point... Dixon's alive and he's still up there, handcuffed on that roof. That's on us." And with that I watched T-Dog get up from the ground and walk into the darkness.

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Mom's hands waived through my hair to form my braid. It was fully dark outside and the campsite had called lights out. Everyone was in their own tents all getting ready for a nightmare filled night. I sat with my back to mom with my eyes trained on the image of my brother and father, that I could see in the faint light of our candle light, who sat just a few feet away from us talking. They spoke in hushed voices and Carl was giggling. I could hear mom let a breathy chuckle of happiness out.

I felt mom's hands come towards the end of my hair and I raised my hand that held the small elastic that would hold my braid in place. She took it from my hands and tied it around, finishing off my hair.

I felt it was loosen then the previous nights and mom did it a lot faster than usual. Every night in this dimly lit tent mom would spent at least ten full minutes working on my hair and I always found it was tight. But tonight she had done my braid in less than two minutes. I felt myself smile again. Mom was happy.

"No leaving the tent tonight." Mom's assumed filled voice said causing a rush of panic to run through me. Crap. Guess I wasn't as stealthy as I thought I was. I only did it a hand full of times but apparently my mother knew about every single one of them... but she never stopped me. I didn't say anything. Instead I now stared into my raised eye brows faced father who had his eyes on me. When did he and Carl stop talking?

"You snuck out?" Dad asked with a look I knew all too well. I felt the need to defend myself.

"I didn't go too far... and I was never gone long... and you can't be mad." But dad's face broke out into a grin before I could continue.

"Did I say I was mad?"
"No but your eye brows did."

Dad broke out into light laughter and shook his head at me. I smiled back.

"A'ight to bed now." Mom said from behind me giving my shoulders a rub and gesturing to my sleeping bag across the way. I nodded and sighed, uncrossing my legs and heading over to my sleeping bag. I saw dad turn back to Carl as I climbed in.

Dad said a few words to Carl while combing his hand through his hair. I heard my brother say

"I love you dad."
"I love you Carl."

Dad replied kissing the crown of his head. His attention shifted to me.

"I found you both." Dad said clearing adding onto something he'd said to Carl. His hand gently pulled one of the loose strings of hair from my braid behind my ear.

I felt myself lean into the touch. I hadn't realised how much I'd missed dad until now. The excitement and adrenaline had worn off and the fact my father now sat here smiling down at me was finally sinking in.

"I missed you." I heard myself say. I watched dad's eye soften and his lips touch my forehead. His hand came up to rub my cheek and I felt his thumb move in an up and down motion.

"I'm so sorry... but I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere" He softly spoke, his hand still on my cheek. I gave a small nod not fully believing the words but not protesting to them either. I suddenly realised that I didn't want to fall asleep. That I didn't want his hand to leave my cheek and for him to go the five step walk over to mom's sleeping bag.

"Why not?" Dad suddenly asked. I must have said it out loud. I felt a pit form inside my stomach. I felt myself become scared of the thought of waking up and him not being here. That this was all just one big dream and that I would feel a shake on my shoulder and wake up to find mom above me telling me I was late to help Amy in the bushes.

I pushed up on my elbows and threw my arms around his neck and my head pushed against his shoulder.

"What if I wake up and you're not here?" I asked in a childish voice. I would have cursed and cringed at myself if I wasn't so scared and didn't feel so vulnerable. I felt his arms wrap around my torso and give me a firm squeeze.

"I will be. You're going to wake up and I'm gonna be right here. I promise." He said in my ear. I knew he was only saying this for my benefit. To make me feel better and to loosen the death grip I had around his neck. It didn't make me want to let go but I did, pulling back with a reluctant nod.

"Ok." I mumbled, my eyes hang down low with a sadden expression. I felt my teeth bite the inside of my lip as my nails dug into the skin of my hands.

Dad's hands let go of my torso and gently grasp my upper arms helping me back down into my sleeping bag. He then pulled the blue flap of the bag up to my chin and pull his sheriffs jacket up to meet it. I felt myself relax at the sight of the jacket so close to me. It was the piece of dad that kept me centre all these weeks.

"Try and get some sleep." And with that I watched him step up from his place on the ground and walk those five steps over to where mom had been watching us. I lifted my arm up out of the bag to grip tight the fabric of the jacket. Feeling the material under my thumb somehow numbed me and calmed me enough to be able to close my eyes.

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At some point I must have fallen asleep as when I open my eyes the sky is alit with light and I can hear the sounds of people moving around camp. My grip still remained on dads jacket and I was suddenly aware my breathing was the only one in the tent. I sat up with a jump and saw no one.

Had it been a dream? The question suddenly came to mind and I wanted to scream. No it was real. It had to be. I suddenly realised how not tired i was. Last night was the best sleep I'd had since the day of the outbreak. Since we'd made it to this miserable humid camp. The tent flap was closed up. Mom and dad must have let me sleep in. I smiled at that. Mom and dad. I could say that again.

For some reason I decided against leaving the tent immediately. Maybe I'm scared I'll go out and dad won't be there. Or maybe I just don't want to face the music yet. Either way I reach out to the backpack behind me and pull out the drawing pad Dale had given me the day before. I fall on my back and propped up my legs, leaning the pad against them. I held the too small pencil, just bigger than my fingers and began drawing simple lines up and down the open page. I feel into a dream like state my hand becoming a mind of its on.

Not sure how long had passed before I decided to sit up and pull my shirt over my singlet and take my hair out of mom's braid. Too lazy to pull it up, I leave it out, placing my drawing pad back in my backpack and pulling on my boots.

I walk pass the usual people I see on my way to the middle of camp giving them small smiles or greetings if we meet eyes. A smile couldn't help itself forming on my face when I saw dad stood over by Glenn. I made a move to approach when a fist collided with my shoulder in a light punch.

"There you are, you slack dog!" Amy's brightly lit voice filled my ears. "Had to do all the work this morning because my partner never showed!" She spoke in a jokingly manner but gave me the stern eyes that said to never do it again. I held my hands in surrender.

"I'm sorry, my roster never showed to wake me up." I nicknamed my mother the rooster. Amy gave a cheeky grin throwing an arm around my shoulders.

"Sounds like you're in need of a new rooster and I happily volunteer."

I'm about to reply when a cry cuts through the air followed by the desperate sound of my brother calling for our mother. My feet take off at a running speed with Amy hot on my heels. I ran until I ended up at the edge of the forest within a small bush area that opened up to a clearing. I run over to mom who kneel holding Carl.

"Mom what's going on!?" I said as I stood behind mom. Her eyes met mine and before she could utter a word the heavy sound of moaning and mushy was heard. My eyes met the sight that had everyone squirming and it threatened to bring up last nights dinner.

With eyes dead to the world and sickly pale green skin these monsters are the things of nightmares. This is my second time seeing a geek. The first time was in our first week in camp when there were only about half of us and nowhere near the amount of supplies we have now. It was before we started doing runs. It was the first time I decided to brave the dark and sneak out of the tent. Only the sounds of nearby insects accompanied me as I walked to the edge of camp to the front of the trees. I debated going further into the woods when a noise picked up and I saw the creature.

I stood there and watched as it walked right in front of me heading away from our camp. The monster paid me no mind as its eyes remained forward. Maybe it couldn't see me but I sure as hell could see it. I stood there starstruck watching it walk away. I remember feeling startled and shocked then fear with just a touch of curiosity.

I watch now as the geeks hungry form devours the carcass of a deer that I can't help wondering if it could have been our dinner. Several of the men crowd around the geek and I see dad among them holding a meter long metal pole. The men poke and push at the creature attempting to remove it from the deer and away from camp. Mom raises up from the ground and wraps a tight arm around my shoulders just as Dale removes the head of the geek with a bladed axe I hadn't noticed before. I flinch at the sound.

"It's the first one we've had up here. They never come this far up the mountain." Dale said looking around in shocked and surprise. My mind immediately goes back to my midnight geek but I refrain from saying anything. It wouldn't matter now.

"Well, they're running out of food in the city, that's what." One of our camp members Jim spoke up from the group of men that had attacked the geek. I always wondered how long it would be before those monsters of the dead would infiltrate their camp. Apart of me knows we can't stay here forever but I wasn't looking forward to having that discussion.

"Son of a bitch. That's my deer!" The thick accent of our friendly neighbourhood redneck cuts through the air drawing everyone's attention. I heard Dale curse under his breath as a tall rough looking middle aged brunette man frame of Daryl Dixon stormed into the clearing.

"Look at it! All gnawed on by this... filthy, disease-bearing, motherless poxy bastard!" He started cursing out the dead geek arms waving around and legs kicking.

"Calm down, son. That's not helping." Dale spoke approaching the angry man.

"What do you know about it, old man?" Daryl snapped back. "Why don't you take that stupid hat and go back to "on golden pond"? I've been tracking this deer for miles. Gonna drag it back to camp, cook us up some venison." Daryl snapped than looked down at his deer and gave a small shrug.

"What do you think? Do you think we can cut around this chewed up part right here?" He asked looking around for an answer. Apart of me wanted to believe it's still be good. I'd never tried deer before but it was meat and we had very little of that. But the more logical and we would be to not risk it. Chances are the deer is inflected.

"I wouldn't risk that."

Daryl cursed.

"That's a damn shame. I got some squirrel... about a dozen or so. That'll have to do." He spoke and my nose scrunched up. A snarling sound filed the air and I jump back in mom's arms as the head of the geek teeth began to snarl, its features moving. Moms grip tighten on me and Carl and Daryl gave us all a dirty look

"Come on, people. What the hell?" He spoke in annoyance as if we had just used the last roll of toilet paper and didn't tell him. He grabbed ahold of his crossbow shooting it with one of his arrows directly between its eyes.

"It's gotta be the brain. Don't y'all know nothing?" He lectured us like children before turning away and marching back towards camp.

I felt mom give me a sight nudge that caused my feet to move and walk back with her and Carl. Some people walked back towards their tents going about their business but mom led us towards the main camping area where dad and a few others were stood.

"Merle! Merle! Get your ugly ass out here!" Daryl yelled looking in every which way head turned to try and catch sight of his brother. "I got us some squirrel! Let's stew 'em up!"

Both me and Carl stood by mom under the cover of the RV with a few others including Amy who gave me an uneasy smile. I returned it.

"Daryl, just slow up a bit. I need to talk to you." Shane approached Daryl from his left moving to stand in front of him. Daryl gave him a look.

"About what?" He asked his eyes still searching for the brother we all knew wasn't coming. I felt my shoulders tense at what we all knew was about to come.

"About Merle. There was a... There was a problem in Atlanta." Shane spoke with hesitation. Daryl looked like he was thinking Shanes words over for a minute.

"He dead?" Shane sighed shaking his head.

"We're not sure."

Clearly that wasn't good enough for the Daryl as I watch him get in Shane's face pointing a finger almost poking him in the eye. 

"He either is or he ain't!"

I see dad make a move toward Daryl and I feel my heart begin to pick up in speed and my breath getting caught in my throat. I know dad can handle himself, he was a sheriff deputy for almost two decades, but this raging man had a weapon; my father didn't.

"No easy way to say this, so I'll just say it." Dad spoke in a straight forward tone.

"Who are you?"

"Rick grimes."

"Rick grimes — you got something you want to tell me?" He snapped now getting in my father face. Dad looked him right in the eye.

"Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal. He's still there." Dad admitted not sounding too bad about the whole thing. Daryl stopped for a second almost like he was having trouble understanding what my father and Shane were getting at. I knew that he knew but he was in denial.

"Hold on. Let me process this. You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?!" He practically screamed, his face turning red from anger.

"Yeah."

Daryl rushes forward to slam into dad but my dad quickly gets the upper hand shoving him off. I feel my breaths become quicker and my palms begin to sweat that I knew weren't from the heat.

"Hey! Watch the Knife!" I hear T-Dog yell and my eyes widen in seeing the shirt knife Daryl pulled from his pants. My body becomes cement and my hand quickly flys out to grab hold of my brothers arm. Whether it was for his sake or mine I didn't know. I feel Carl move his hand into mine and give me what could only be described as a squeeze of reassurance. His palm wasn't sweating or shaking and I came to the awful realisation that my twelve year old brother was braver than me.

Shane was quick to slam Daryl into the ground and place him in a chokehold, one that I was sure he was no stranger too.

"Okay. Okay." Shane said trying to calm him down.

"You'd best let me go!" Daryl yelled desperately trying to escape Shane's grip.

"Nah, I think it's better if I don't." Shane snapped but I could see him struggling to keep his grip on the man. 

"Choke hold's illegal!"

"You can file a complaint. Come on, man. We'll keep this up all day." Shane said as dad bend down to Daryl level looking him in the eye yet again.

I couldn't hear was what said but whatever my father was saying to Daryl seemed to calm him down enough to stop fighting Shane. He seemed to say something that provoked a nod from Daryl and for Shane to release his hold on him. All three men rose from the ground and began to speak in louder voices.

"What I did was not on a whim. Your brother does not work and play well with others." Dad stated the obvious.

"It's not Rick's fault." T-Dog stepped forward looking at Daryl, who turned his confused gaze to him.
"I had the key. I dropped it." T-Dog admitted sounding more ashamed than he did last night.

"You couldn't pick it up?" Daryl asked in frustration.

"Well, I dropped it in a drain." He admitted. This caused Daryl anger to come flooding back

"If it's supposed to make me feel better, it don't." He snapped at T-Dog. To T-Dogs credit he doesn't back down but instead steps forward.

"Well, maybe this will. Look, I chained the door to the roof... So the geeks couldn't get at him... With a padlock. It's gotta count for something." He said trying to get at something I'm not getting. Daryl's anger doesn't fade in the sightless.

"Hell with all y'all! Just tell me where he is so that I can go get him." Daryl snapped looking at dad. I watch dad's lips about to move with a reply when mom comes to stand by me and Carl.

"He'll show you." Mom says and I turn to look to see her staring intently at dad
"Isn't that right?" She asks raising an eyebrow. I see dad turn to look at mom, their eyes meeting for a few seconds before he looks at me and Carl. He gives me a look I don't understand before turning back to look at Daryl and the rest.

"I'm going back."

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I watch dad flip open the flap of our tent as he steps out now fully dressed in his sheriffs uniform mom had only just washed this morning.

I hate this.

I hate this so much.

Dad was going back. He was leaving. I look at his sightly damp uniform and I wonder what it will look like when I see it next. Will it be as it was now or covered in his own blood. I feel my brother beside me who hasn't said a word since dad told us he was going back. Not that I haven't said anything either.

Shane immediately walks up to dad to which they have a conversation my ears are not able to hear. Shane looked about how I felt. It was decided that not only were dad and Daryl going back but Glenn and T-Dog would be tag along for the ride. Apart of me was grateful for it. The more people there the better chance dad might have in coming back. But still I was left completely unsettled and not at all happy.

After talking to mom, dad came up to me and Carl. He looked us both in the eye, telling us everything will be alright. That it's just a quick trip back and that he'll be back before we ever knew he left. But I would know he left. I would know because he might not come back.

Carl nodded displaying true maturity for his age by simply giving dad a side hug and telling him he loved him. I wanted to scream. Why couldn't I be that calm. Why couldn't I do that and feel confident in dads return.

I wanted to bang my head against a tree.

As my little brother walked towards our family tent, dad set his eyes on me. I don't speak. He doesn't speak. We simply stare. I'm not sure if he'd waiting for me to have a similar reaction to Carls or to be like mom and yell at him. I'm not going to yell. I don't want to. Not went dad has done nothing wrong. He's simply being the dad I've looked up to my entire life. The one that would do whatever he could to protect others.

I watch him step forward a few steps until he'd directly in front of the log I sit on. I feel his hand touch the top of my head and his fingers gently run through my locks in a comforting manner. I close my eyes to scare to look up. I feel his lips touch my forehead as he says something my mind is too far away to hear, and I watch his feet walk away.

I look up just in time to see the truck drive out of camp and down the hill.  Now I really feel like screaming.

Mom had disappeared into the tent possibly to check on my brother. I don't move. My eyes remain focused in the direction the truck took off in. I didn't even say goodbye. I just sat here like a moron too afraid of my own voice.

I'm not sure how long I've been sat here until I hear Amy call my name. I push back the flood that desperately wants to spill from my eyes and stand up, heading towards her so we can start our morning chores.

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I watch my brother splash around in the water and Uncle Shane laughing. Frog catching. That's what they were doing. I find my lips wanting to turn up into a smile when Carl finally catches one and does a little happy dance.

"I'm beginning to question the division of labor here." Jacqui voice catches my attention and turn back around to the group of women I'm currently doing laundry with. I didn't normally do this job. Usually I stuck to food collecting and simple clean up but Amy insisted I join them by the lake. She was not too subtle about suggesting I could use a distraction but I didn't comment on it kinda appreciating the thought.

She insisted it was fun and the women were nice.

"Can someone explain to me how the women wound up doing all the Hattie McDaniel work?" Jacqui asked looking around at each of us.

"The world ended. Didn't you get the memo?" Amy stated from my left. Everyone cracked smiles and laughed.

"It's just the way it is." Carol shrugged scrubbing at a shirt she held between her hands. My hands played with the wet fabric of the shirt I held. I had given up on washing it a while ago.

"I do miss my Maytag." Carol spoke in a longing voice. This led to an entirely different conversation.

"I miss my Benz, my sat nav." Andrea admits.

"I miss my coffeemaker with that dual-drip filter and built-in grinder, honey." Jacqui added.

"My computer... And texting." Amy adds on.

"I miss my bed." I decided to add in which earn me some surprise looks seeing that was the first time I'd opened my mouth since Amy and I had come down here.

"I miss my vibrator." Andrea admits causing my eyes to widen and laughs to envelope the group.

"Oh my God!" Amy cringes and I can't help feeling the same way. It only got worst when Carol looked up at Ed, who was stood not ten feet away before admitting to missing hers too. I actually felt a laugh come out of me at that and my cheeks felt on fire. Amy wasn't lying when she said the women were fun.

"What's so funny?" The rough voice of Carols husband cuts in causing the laugh to come to an immediate halt. I turn my glaze to see Ed now standing only a few feet away from us with a look of intensity.

"Just swapping war stories, Ed." Andrea spoke up a loud and confident voice. The look in his eyes only grew as he folded his arms across his chest. I felt my heart began to quicken and my mind begin the panic as I had absolutely no idea where this was going.

"Problem, Ed?" Andrea asked, eye brows raised, staring him down with her own look.

"Nothin' that concerns you. And you ought to focus on your work. This ain't no comedy club." Ed snapped pointing to the clothes we all held. I couldn't help the look that crossed my face and the shook that hit my body at his words.

"Ed, tell you what," Andrea spoke in an aggressive tone moving to stand on her feet.
"you don't like how your laundry is done, you are welcome to pitch in and do it yourself. Here." Andrea tosses the shirt she held st his chest. Eds eyes flared and he throws the shirt right back at her throwing it with enough force to send Andrea back a step.

"Oh!" Andrea exclaimed, eye wide with fury.

"Ain't my job, missy." Ed smirked

"What is your job, Ed? Sitting on your ass smoking cigarettes?" She said.

"Well, it sure as hell ain't listening to some uppity smart-mouthed bitch. Tell you what... come on." He looks at Carol gesturing her to him with the movement of his hands.

"Let's go."

Carol looks defeated. Drops her head as Ed steps forward and grabs her arm. Andrea and a few other make a move to stop him and that seems to push Ed to the limit as his hand strikes out and slams into the side of carols face. That's when all hell breaks loose.

Andrea lungs for Ed as the women crowd around in order to protect Carol. Every single woman is on her feet crowding around Carol blocking off Ed. All expect for me.

"Get off her!" They yell as Ed continues to yell for Carol demanding she come to him like she's a dog on a leash. That's when I see Shane. Shane who seems to appear out of nowhere and uses the power of three men to drag Ed  away from the group. That's when I jump to my feet with a gasp eyes wide enough to hurt as I watch Ed attempt to fight off my uncle.

"Get off me!" I hear Ed scream out as my uncles first slams into his face over and over and over and over again. I watch in horror as
Shane mutilates Ed's face. I've never ever seen my uncle this angry. Never seen him beat another human being. I knew he was strong. I knew at times he could be scary. But I never thought I'd ever have to witness it.

"Shane, stop! Just stop!" I hear Andrea scream out at Shane. My uncles fist opens up to grab the collar of Ed's shirt as he pulls in close.

"You put your hands on your wife, your little girl or anybody else in this camp one more time, I will not stop next time. Do you hear me? Do you hear me?!" Shane practically screams in Ed's face shaking him a few times. Even from here I could see the look of fear in Ed's eyes. Or his one remaining eye as the other is bruised shut.

"Yes." His mouth moves to form the word.

"I'll beat you to death, Ed." Shane snarls.

"Ed!" I hear Carol calls out in a desperate voice, one that almost breaks my heart.

"I'll beat you to death." Shane screams as his fist collides against Ed's face on last time. He steps up from the ground and kicks Ed in the stomach, one last time for good measure.

"Oh God! No. God!" Carol yells, ripping herself from the arms that held her, running over her eyes flooded with tears as her knees collided with the ground beside her beaten husband.

"Ed, I'm sorry. Oh my God. Ed, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Ed. Ed, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Ed." Carol apologies over and over and over and over again. She says it so many times I'm convinced she's on autopilot and this is her general setting. I don't move, my eyes still wide, still so in shock from what I just witnessed.

From what I watched my uncle do.

And how easily he did it.

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.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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𝑨𝑼𝑻𝑯𝑶𝑹 𝑵𝑶𝑻𝑬!!!

Ok like Rick and Rory are literally the cutest. They make my heart melt

And look at me making Rick promise Rory that and knowing for a fact he's gonna break it just makes me wanna curl up in a ball and cry