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My heart only had
one thought
One want,
one need
Despite all
In spite it all
All my heart
has ever wanted
Ever wanted

– Stephanie Laurens

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Aella Targaryen had wed on the anniversary of her father's death. To her cousin, nonetheless, continuing the long-standing tradition of her family to marry their relatives. It was a day that was meant to bring joy and overshadow the sorrow that had pursued that very date for years, but Aella could not feel any of that joy, rather a bitterness that she had not been allowed to mourn as she had for nigh on six years.

Bitterness, because she had not been allowed to wed the one she truly loved.

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CAST

Katherine Winnick
as
Aella Targaryen

Daughter of Aemon Targaryen
Wife of Rhaegon Targaryen
Rider of Karnax

Matt Smith
as
Daemon Targaryen

Son of Baelon Targaryen
Brother of King Viserys
Rider of Caraxes

Charlie Hunnam
as
Rhaegon Targaryen

Son of Baelon Targaryen
Brother of King Viserys
Rider of Morghul

Alex Høgh Andersen
as
Aemon Targaryen

Son of Aella and Rhaegon Targaryen
Brother of Viserra and Visenys Targaryen
Dragonless

Tamzin Merchant
as
Viserra Targaryen

Daughter of Aella and Rhaegon Targaryen
Sister of Aemon and Visenys Targaryen
Rider of Vermithrax

Morfydd Clark
as
Visenys Targaryen

Daughter of Aella and Rhaegon Targaryen
Sister of Aemon and Viserra Targaryen
Rider of Veraxes

The rest of the HOTD cast as their respective characters

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It seems to me,
that love could be
labelled poison
and we'd still drink
it anyways

– Atticus

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Aella Targaryen had learned quickly enough where her loyalties had to lie. Despite everything; all the feelings and heartache and the guilt of her betrayal to her sister, she knew. Viserys was the King, and Aella's husband was his brother. She was a woman, a dragon rider, but a woman, and the moment her father died, she no longer had any agency of her own. She was something to be sold, and to be bought, and to be used. So when the Great Council of Harrenhal had decided that the crown should lay upon Viserys' head, and not Rhaenys', she had made the only decision she could. She sided with the man that had robbed her family of everything. And in the midst of it all, her heart tugged her towards the King's brother. Not her husband, but the Rogue Prince.

Rhaegon Targaryen was the reason his mother was dead. It was a widely known fact, a reality that had followed him all of his life. It was like a monstrous shadow he cast onto the wall, bleak and miserable. Most of the time when people looked at him, they looked at him with pity. A boy who never knew his mother, a child that caused his father so much pain. And somewhere in their stares, he saw they expected him to feel guilty. Expected him to do better, try harder, and learn more quickly than everyone else. Because he had robbed his mother of her life. And that was what Rhaegon did. Despite the reality that many women died in or after childbirth, despite the knowledge in the back of his mind that it was not his fault, he did it. He learned how to wield a sword quicker and harder than his brothers did, studied harder and listened intently to the maesters, and inquired his grandfather on the ways of ruling and diplomacy. Later on, when people looked back at things, they would say he was the perfect mix of Viserys and Daemon. Not too eager to please, and not too quick to anger. And yet, it seemed tragedy followed him just as easily as it followed them.

Aemon Targaryen stood to inherit nothing. He was the son of the third son, so far down in the line of succession that he might as well have not been in it at all. Yet despite that, it seemed he had the most fortune out of most of his family. Most days, he could do as he wished. Frolic around the castle? Spar with the knights? Read into the early hours of the morn? He could do whatever he set his mind to. He was not the King, or the heir, or the only daughter of the monarch, or a member of the council, or the sister of the adversary. He was the King's favourite nephew – his only nephew, but that was beside the point – and Viserys would give anything to see him happy. Just as he would do anything to see his daughter happy. That was one thing that bound Aemon and Rhaenyra Targaryen together. The love of the King. The other was the troubling pregnancies of their mothers. Aemon supposed his mother had been lucky, with only two cot deaths and one stillbirth, compared to the many child deaths Queen Aemma had experienced. But a child's death was still a child's death, first or third, the only or one of many. And a sibling's death was still a sibling's death, and Rhaenyra's arms were still a comfort even when they were both lost.

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Never before
Had I wanted to say
So much,
But said so little;
Felt so much
But stayed
So silent

– David Jones

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Author's Note

Please read! For people who have read Fire and Blood or know Targaryen history, Rhaegon is the last child of Baelon and Alyssa Targaryen that died in cannon, but I changed his name from Aegon because there are already two Aegons in the story and throwing another into the mix would be chaotic. His dragon's name is Morghul, which was the name of Princess Jaehaera's dragon, but I am changing that because coming up with dragon names is hard and the name fits Morghul's personality (can you call it that??). Some things in the story will be changed majorly to fit the story of this fic.

Thank you xanderherondale for helping me choose the names of some of the characters in this book!

Warnings! The contents of this book could be triggering to some readers. This is a pic set in the ASOIAF universe, and as such will have many brutal topics. Some of these include violence, gore, graphic death, incest, mentions of sexual assault/harassment, child death, torture, graphic childbirth, war and other things you would find in this universe. If any of these topics trigger you, do not read this book.

Disclaimer! I do not own the story of House of the Dragon or Fire and Blood. That right belongs to HBO and George R.R. Martin. I do however own my characters and their plot lines, so any use of them without my permission is not allowed.