REVIEWER: sungielxver

CUSTOMER: cassandrejanvier

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Cover [7/10]

I love the overall vibe of the cover. Especially the characters used for Akhyra and Luciana. The cover is classic barbie / fairytale core and also is kind of like the covers physical books have. It would easily fit into one of my favorite covers of wattpad, if not for a few reasons.

The subtitle of the story which is placed in the spotlight isn't easily visible. The font used for the title is one of the classic canva fonts, and imo this story deserves a better font than that. Your name is also almost squished at the bottom, not leaving a good impression. I also would suggest putting the awards batch on top right of the book. The title needn’t come in between the characters and your name can be comfortably placed at the bottom of the cover, in a thicker font. The subtitle can be completely removed, as well as the wattpad symbol and the novel tag.

However, I am not in the field of graphic designing so feel free to discuss my concerns and your opinions with whoever you decide to get your cover modified from.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Title [3/5]

I would say the title of the story isn't very relevant in the context that Akhyra and Luciana both encounter a series of troubles one after the other, including their past and present. Hence, they constantly need to take more steps in order to be successful and reach the peaks of their respective careers once again.

However, I am assuming that the main couple would ‘take one more step’ towards improving their relationship in the future chapters before having a happy ending.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Blurb [4.5/5]

The blurb is a perfect insight to the story, giving a good yet vague description about the main plot of the story. I would suggest adding the main characters exchanging a few dialogues in the blurb, as a sneak peak to their relationship.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Inception [9/10]

The prologue itself gives a perfect outlook of the themes the story is going to cover. Racism, hate, media play, fame, misunderstandings, friendship, consequences and so on.

The dynamics between Luciana and his team are introduced in the prologue itself where his friends are both happy with his contributions to the team in winning matches as well as playfully jealous of his continuous unmatched achievements. We also get to know that Luciana is the odd ball in his team as he doesn't engage himself with distractions during international matches. He also defends his friends when racist people make fun of them and his friends have his back when the fight breaks out. A pleasant example of a tight-knit friendship.

In the prologue itself, we are given more information about how the aftermath of the fight rolled out for Luciana and how he has now become the involuntary chauffeur for his coach’s daughter, Akhyra.

The first chapter gives us a brief introduction about Akhyra’s daily life and about how her team behaves around her and caters to her preferences to make her comfortable. During the fan meet event during the end of her last spectacle in England, she gets herself in a scandal after getting panicked and pushing away one of her young fans who approached her without permission. She is made to return back to her hometown and lay low for a while, after pausing her European Tour and other schedules.

The first chapter hence gives more ideas of the themes involved in the story. Overall, a great opening to the novel and a top-notch inception.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Plot, Idea and Execution [23/25]

Plot : the plot is mainly ‘forced proximation’ with the side plot being ‘enemies to lovers’.

this book is an onc novel having the main prompt ‘she is like snow. beautiful but cold.’ the side prompt is ‘he was sunshine, i was midnight rain’ and i believe both the prompts are executed very well in this story.

Idea : the idea is that Akhyra is distrusting and scared of humans and human contact in general after having a tragic incident in the past where she was pushed off of stage and was unable to even walk for quite a long while. however, after Luciana’s appearance in her life, she starts to recover from her phobia at an unusual speed with Luciana becoming the only person she can interact and have skinship with without feeling uncomfortable.

Execution : the execution of the plot, the prompts and the idea were immaculate and commendable.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Characters and Emotions [13/15]

Akhyra : Akhyra is a well-written and thoughtful character. She has her own set of troubles and trauma to deal with, but she still manages to achieve great heights in her field, becoming one of the top ballerinas from her town. She comes off as cold and rude in the earlier chapters for denying meeting with her fans without paying any mind to their emotions. However, as the story progresses, she makes significant personality development. She becomes more caring and trusts the people around her more, making her character a loved one.

Luciana : Luciana is a great brother and friend. He always stands up for his loved ones and supports Akhyra through everything. No matter if she needs comfort, a shoulder to cry on, someone to hold. He supports her even when they are at odds and never stops openly caring for her.

Emotions : I love both these characters and the emotions experienced by them are portrayed with fine execution.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Writing Style and Tone [8/10]

The story didn't feel monotone at any part, not even the prologue. Your writing style is unique and consistent throughout and I love how your story incorporates countries and towns less heard about.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Grammar Point [18.5/20]

Didn't spot any major grammatical errors at all, the story is flawless and a smooth read.

/ 🔮 / TOTAL ── [86/100]

–TEAM DREAMERS–