𝑀𝑦 𝐿𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝐿𝑜𝑣𝑒－ 𝐴𝑑𝑒𝑙𝑒

𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑

sᴇᴀsᴏɴ ᴏɴᴇ, ❝ ᴛʜᴇʀᴀᴘʏ ❞

𝐊𝐎𝐓𝐀 𝐂𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐖𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐖𝐀

𝐊𝐎𝐓𝐀 walked into their shared apartment with a grin on his face. "baby! baby-" he yells then sees Maria's head pop up from around the corner. She shushes him but his face still holds a smile. "Kota—Winter and Bear are napping, if you wake them—i'll stab you." she whispers as he pulls her into a hug. Kissing the top of her head, Kota moves the toys from the couch and pulls her down with him making her squeal.

"what's got you so happy?" Maria mumbles laying her head on his chest. "oh nothing, just got a promotion," he shrugs gaining a gasp from the girl.

"no way! I'm so proud of you," she kisses his face while Kota smiles proudly at her. The man looked at the picture behind him in thought while Maria rambled about the kids. One day he wanted to marry her, he knew she'd be the prettiest bride in a white dress, brightest smile.

He did everything for her so she didn't have to. Kota knew Maria hated it but he wanted to give his children what his father couldn't give him. Looking at Maria he saw his future and it was bright with a dog, some more kids, a white picket fence, with Sunday dinners with both of their families.

"baby, are you okay?" she touched his face lovingly meeting her brown-eyed gaze Kota pulls her into a kiss.

"when you're with me, i'm more than okay."

"ew babe, you're so corny!"

"𝑴𝑨𝑹𝑰𝑨, 𝑯𝑶𝑾 𝑨𝑹𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑫𝑶𝑰𝑵𝑮?" Four simple words but, Maria couldn't answer them truthfully. It's been a while since she's had to answer a question about it's always, "I'm fine" or "alright".

"i'm fine." she smile falsely at the doctor. The woman sighed and took off her glasses. "Maria, I've been seeing you for four years now, every day you come in here and say 'fine' or 'okay'. I'll ask again, how are you?" the psychiatrist raised a brow at the woman.

Maria rubs her sweaty hands on her cherry printed skirt. "I've been having dreams again." she complies, staring at the ceiling. "can you tell me about them, your dreams?" the woman wrote on her notepad.

"he's alive, the kids are happy, we have a nice house-"

"are you happy?" the woman cuts her off. Maria glances at the woman and sighs then shakes her head.

"I don't know, when I look at myself, it seems like I'm carrying all the pain." Maria spoke clearing her throat. The other woman hands her the box of tissues with a sympathetic look.

Maria wipes the stray tear and continues, "I feel as if a weight is on me. and I can't feel like this because the kids depend on me." she sniffles, "I have no one, but I have everyone, it's so fucking hard sometimes,"

"what makes you happy Maria? who makes you happy?" Ms. Moore leans forward putting her notepad on her lap. "every time you come here, you have a bright face talking about your kids- even your work kids."

"you need to let go of the past, it'll hold onto you until, you're swimming in hidden memories." the doctor says staring into Maria's eyes. "I want you to take some time, to grieve, you haven't grieved for yourself but, for others."

"let go."

𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄 Maria entered her home, it was silent. No Appa to greet her. Bear was at basketball practice, Winnie was at a friend's house, and August was with her grandparents. Maria remembered the day they had got this apartment. Kota carried her over the threshold while she was six months pregnant with Bear.

"This is our home, you'll grow up here," Kota mumbled to her belly. When he saw Maria smiling at him he whispered, "can't let your mom hear our 'Man' talk."

God, Maria wanted to hate him, for what he put her through. He made her feel loved only to rip it away in the cruelest way possible. "I'm going to marry you."

"what?" she mumbles as she adjusted Winnie on her chest. Kota looks at her with Bear laying comfortably in his arms. "i'm going to marry you, Maria." he whispers in her ear. She felt heat creep up to her cheeks. The hum of the television was drowned out by her fast-beating heart.

A bile of acid crept out of her throat making Maria run to the bathroom. Tears sprang from her eyes as she gripped the side of the toilet. The universe was cruel. One minute you could feel on top of the world the next, you're laying in a cold bed, pregnant with nothing but an old high-school football hoodie staring at the wall.

Maria never understood how August was so happy. She was depressed for half of her pregnancy and didn't hold her until she was a month old. Maria's mother took care of August when she couldn't. postpartum hit the woman like a truck.

She wanted nothing more hide underneath the covers every-time August wailed. Memories of the little boy from the funeral made their way to her mind. An innocent child, her husband's child, and her kids' brother.

Maria stripped from her clothes and sank into the bath water she had ran.  The hot water soothed her joints as she laid her head on the side of the tub. Once she got out, slowly got dressed into her pajamas. Maria sat on her bed staring at the happy picture of her and her dead husband on their wedding day.

That's when Maria felt herself slip away. Finally, She did what she was supposed to do four years ago, she cried.

❛𝑩𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒇𝒇 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒌𝒆𝒆𝒑 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒊𝒎❜

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄:

this is a filler chapter but, i wanted to show Kota's character. Caught was three years older than her. he wasnt abusive.

Maria hasn't grieved at all. She went through postpartum with August, she never grieved.

appa is with august also, all the kids are gone

i just wanted to show Kota's character.

hope you like it, don't forget to vote and comment

𝟒:𝟒𝟓𝐏𝐌
𝟕/𝟏𝟏/𝟐𝟑