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Some day I feel everything at once, like every emotion. And the other day I feel nothing at all.

What's this?

I don't know what's worse.

Drowning in my thoughts or climbing on any building to meet death.

Tonight I feel like I am sinking, my body is fading and collapsing in water. I was falling deeper and deeper into the massive ocean. It is swallowing me whole as if I am nothing.

And how can I be?

When I am particularly nobody for this world.

Water bubbles out of my mouth, as I choke on it. This feeling is incredible as always.

Handling this body in this world is far harder than anyone could think. And that's what it is. Never have I ever dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul.

Who sometimes needs to be free and sometimes needs the escape.

I can not name myself properly, who am I?

Just a speck of dust, nothing more. And even for being that I have to live but I don't want to.

A thumping sensation carves up in my head leaving me weak from my knees. My body shakes a little in fear.

End.

This is the end, the misery, and suffering stops here.

Just when I feel I am going to breathe last time on this earth someone pulls me towards them.

I met a warm chest, with a racing heartbeat. The body was trembling like mine. But the difference is what it is.

My shivering from anger, their from sobbing.

Again my eyes opened where I closed my eyes a second ago.

At least what it feels like.

"Y-You're fine...! You are fine! I am here. I-I got you. Don't c-cry~ My heart hurts seeing you cry." An evaporated hoarse voice enters my ears making me believe that I am alive.

I breathed through my nose but choked on my own tears.

Tears.

Heavy tears are dropping from my eyes, maybe because of defeat and failure.

I was alive and breathing, in his room.

It was all a dream, a very satisfying dream but I don't want it to be a dream as always.

I aggressively wanted to push him, wished to free myself, but my deceiving body is there to make me feel vulnerable.

These two shaky little fists of mine are punching him on his hard yet soft chest, continuously cursing words left my chapped lips which are thirsty for water and food but I am not going to give them satisfaction.

"Shh...I know...I know. Y-You are mad at me for waking you up. I know...." He sucks air through his mouth, which gives a small sound.

"But I will always wake you up like this. I am not going to let you die...I already know that you are not going to die in your dreams but you are too precious to even watch your own death in them." He caressed my hair which I love.

Why? I don't know.

It calms me down. But I stayed silent. Not allowing this magic to dominate me in any way.

And precious.

I scoffed mentally. Does this mean, useless, pathetic, disgusting, and gross?

Well, if it means these words, then I am going to name myself precious.

"It must be terrifying for you....watching your death, in front of your eyes " He paused, stealing a quick glimpse of me in his eyes.

"But you didn't waver, not even a little bit, whenever it gets into your head or in real life." He smiled a bit.

"My chipmunk is soooooo strong." He pecked my temple, the wet feeling of his lips knock in my heart, almost making my heart flutter, but I did something which he didn't expect at all.

I pushed him hard, leading him straight on the floor, the little rest of my body on his chest gives me energy.

His warm chest is everything I need, but it scares me to death. What if something happened to him like...

No!! I don't want to!!

Never in my life, I want him to suffer what he suffered for touching me and calling me his.

His eyes widened in panic, shock was clearly visible on his face. It is the first time I did this to him, but it is also the first time he kissed me.

His eyes pour emotions into me, like screaming at me, asking what he did wrong?

I retrieve back my posture and after clearing my throat, I warn him, "I don't belong to anyone, Min Yoongi!" My teeth grit in annoyance as I cried out, but more like telling myself.

Not giving a single glance to him, I raised on the mattress, my backside facing him but as always the dizziness arises.

An unsteady yet soft voice called my name from behind.

But not letting anything affect me, I walk forward not knowing what's coming for me.

A small piece of my shirt got stuck in the mattress corner leading to tearing my whole cream-colored shirt from behind, leaving me only in my jet black bra.

My breath hitched.

Immediately my eyes glued on the wall. I wanted to run away from this place. But the feet were not dragging me out, they are like soldered on the floor.

As if everything in me stopped when his harsh voice crashes in the room, making me flinch for the first time.

"Who did this to you?"

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