chapter 002.
⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡
( ʳᵉᵃˡ ˡⁱᶠᵉ, ⁱᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ )

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 ᵈⁱᵃʳʸ!!

𝗱𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗱𝗶𝗮𝗿𝘆, (10th grade)

26 may

having a crush on the boy who doesn't see you is the worst thing you can do. however, no one warned me, at least until it was too late. everyone is now warning me and saying I have to move on and pay attention to the guys who want me too, but I can't control it.

nobody can control whether you like the sweet one from the parallel class who is friendly to everyone or the mean one from your class who only talks to girls he finds attractive, there are so many possibilities but your heart just chooses one and you have no control about it.

and that's what fascinates me, why him? why exactly the boy where you know that it won't work, instead of your heart letting you choose the right one.

what hurts more? being rejected or don't even get noticed in that way. he knows i exist he blessed me ones but i think thats it, i dont even think he knows my name to be honest, when he addresses me for homework for example he calls me ody like everyone else, he probably just heard that everyone else around me calls me that.

"sup ody, can i cop your homework? i know you did it, pretty please" and he always asks me because he knows full well that i always give it to him.

and i did, with a big smile i handed it over to him and i didn't even got a "thanks" but that didn't bothered me that moment i was just happy he talked to me and asked me, like he could've asked anyone.

i actually blushed completely just because he was talking to me, without another word, he put the notebook back on the table and didn't talked to me for the rest of the day.

and yet i was sitting in bed smiling and telling someone about it. for a guy that j̵u̵s̵t̵ ̵s̵e̵e̵'s̵ ̵m̵e̵ ̵a̵s̵ ̵a̵ ̵f̵r̵i̵e̵n̵d̵ doesn't give two shits about me, at least that's what ivy always says.

but at least he knows i exist? i would've know cause he texts me but that's it, we only keep conversation online and most of the time not even in privat, in the groupchat or we snap once a month.

maybe he's just shy in real life? that's the biggest lie ever, but i keep telling it myself. probably because I still have hope somewhere. for example, yesterday he left the door open for me without other people behind me as we were both on our way to the cafeteria at the same time, he never does that otherwise so he had to know that we were sitting together.

my mom always said that it was the puberty and that it would go away at some point, maybe it would just take longer for him but i doubt that he already stopped growing and has not a single pimple on his face.

i don't even know why I take it to heart, Ii'll be over it in a few years anyway, well i hope. i actually planned to behave a little from him after school, but that would also mean that I would have to behave away from the others in our circle of friends, and i dont know if im willing to do that.

i did many things, and now after all of that nothing was worth it, i wanna forget him so bad. he never made me happy, all i did was crying when i saw him making out with another girl at a party, worst thing he doesnt even know what he is doing because he simply doesnt care.

i want someone to hug, to kiss and i can tell my feelings, how i really feel without fearing to be judged. and with chris i cant't even talk about the weather today. i even feel judged by him when i just sit down across from him, but i bet he doesn't even notice.

and everytime i think we get closer he just drops everything and acts like i dont exist. perfect example in class. he turns around to me asks something and i explain it to him or when he needs something, in another situations i dont exist.

its like he draws me on paper everytime he needs me and after that he destroys it and throws it away. its always been like that, oh spare me besides online i exist. in groupchat we sometimes talk but in real life he walks past me like im a homeless sitting on the street.

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 ᵖᵃˢᵗ!!

SOPHMORE YEAR

bell rang a few minutes ago, the classroom door was closed, but it wasn't quiet inside. everyone had conversations throughout the entire classroom, like the new couple from the very front to the very back, but the two of them also can't keep their hands apart and have to pass grades to each other in every lesson where they tell each other how much they love each other.

everyone finds them weird and unpleasant but odette thinks it's cute. she always looks at them with a big smile while they talk to each other. she's always wanted something like that since the day her mom read "Kiss the Frog" to her every evening in elementary school, sometimes when she can't sleep they still do it.

ody was always fascinated by the love between the two of them, even if she sometimes giggles in bed and imagines how she and chris kiss and then they're no longer frogs and life their happy ending, whereupon her mom asks her why she giggles so much. but she has a crush on the wrong boy for things like that.

the class isn't any quieter while the teacher desperately tries to divide people into two groups for the task of a new topic, usually the person sitting next to them and he mixes those sitting alone together.

history, one of odette's best subjects. today it's about the teacher giving you an assignment to see if you have understood the topic, which Mr Woods might grade, but he always says that when no one is listening, in the end he never does it.

"chris you can turn around and work with odette" mr. Woods points slightly at her before turning to others, chris' seatmate, was picked up at the beginning of the lesson because of a stomach ache and daisy, the black-haired girl's seatmate, is not there today which brings them both to the situation.

"with who?" chris raises his arm desperately and Mr. Woods sighs, "the girl behind you, she sits alone too." the boy sitting in front of odette turns around slightly when the black-haired girl catches his eye. she gives him a slightly hurt smile with together pressed lips and waves slightly so he knows the teacher meant her.

slightly annoyed, chris grabs his writing materials and turns completely around, sitting opposite her while ody looks at her book, completely intimidated. "so" her voice is quiet, which is why the boy raises his head and looks at the girl. which makes her blush even more.

actually he should know her, she sits at the same table as him at lunch break every day but he always looked at everyone else. "yo chris" his gaze snaps from her to one of his buddies who are sitting at the bench next to the two of them.

they grinned a bit when they saw who he was working with, which he just brushed off in annoyance, "are you coming to practice today?" chris gives the blonde boy a nod.

but what makes the girl most nervous is that it really felt like it was the first time the two of them were talking alone. turns out that he doesn't even know her name so basically its their first time.

"what exactly do we have to do?" chris doesn't even look at her but instead looks at the book. "that task" she smiles a little and points with her index finger at the task in the open book.

he gives her a nod before the two fall silent and begin the task. "ody?" he asks and she raises her head in suprise, she is almost finished with the task while he only has two sentences. "i know you're smart and shit, can you explain that to me a little bit." he scratches his head slightly which made her smile and lean a little closer to him.

"so we need to describe the french revolution in our own words" she tries to speak a little louder while he listens to her. "okay, so" he reads his two sentences to her and she nods in agreement. "that's a good start. now just why and how it all happend" "yup got it" he nods before continuing with the task.

after a few minutes, the ninth grader pushes his paper to her while she looks bored around the class so that she can read it through. he looks at her nervously as her eyes slide over the page and a smile forms on her lips. "you're good" suprised she looks over at him, he bites his lip slightly and grins.

"you sound so surprised" he grins and leans back into the chair and immediately her voice is taken away, he looks at her with raised eyebrows while he licks his teeth with his tongue. "oh I didn't mean it like-" he waves her off, "relax."

and there was the red on her cheeks again, the red that she liked the most, the exact chris sitting in front of her is the one she found so interesting. who she developed a crush on because he talked like that to other people and now like that to her.

suddenly everything negative about him disappeared from her head, and that was exactly the reason why she was into him for so long instead of realizing that he was bad for her, because he always pulls things like that just before she realizes it so that she falls back into the big hole.

but the other chris is the one she is most used to, who now shows up again, "time for everyone to get back to their seats" without a goodbye or thank you, the boy turns back to his seat and leaves the still slightly red girl alone, a small, hurt smile forms on her lips as she looks back at the board.

now everything was normal again, like every day, he acted as if he didn't know her, he had what he wanted and was nice to her because he had to get along with her for that half hour. the girl's little hope of friendship was dashed again and now he's walking past her in the hallway again as if he doesn't know her.

she was like air, he didn't even give her a glance, was he doing this on purpose? no, but at some point he found a use for all of it and used it for the things he needed. was he a bad person for taking advantage of that? probably, but maybe chris is just bored of how easy he gets the girls to do what he wants.

the hockey player is not exactly unknown for the girls and there is always a little giggle from the group of girls he walks past - it's nothing new for him to make a girl drool over him after flirting with her just to get the answers for something or a little make out at a party.

but today odette didn't mind at all because he theoretically talked to her for longer than ever, the next time he ignored her she would be sad but today she spent the rest of the day going to her next classes with a big smile on her face, completly clueless.

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 ⁱᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ!!

( now )

indentical octuplets + chris ⁉️🫤🗣️

you're odd 🤣; ody
sleeping relaxo 🥺😔: lizzy
lana enthusiast 🫤; daisy
ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣; ivy
wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶; chris
tuff guy 🥱; matt
colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️; nick
ur bad boy waylon 😈😈; waylon
nate 😊😊; nate

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
kys
kys
kys
kys
kys
kys
kys
kys

nate 😊😊
good morning you too

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
kys
kys
kys
kys
kys

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
did you take your pills already?

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
kys
kys
kys
kys

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
waylon she's out again

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
don't mention it in my appearance

you're odd 🤣
pennywise mentioned ❤️
literally went to therapy because of that ginger

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
literally my experience with ivy
but wow
i thought we were more then that

tuff guy 🥱
just get with me
i can treat you better

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
oh

tuff guy 🥱
as my side hoe!!

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
why am i nobody's number one 🫤🫤

lana enthusiast 🫤
look in the mirror 🤣

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
y'all are haters
guys how do i apologize to ivy

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
what did you do

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
nth

tuff guy 🥱
write her a poem always work

lana enthusiast 🫤
ask @chris he writes a poem for every girl!

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
iont write poems 🤣❌
i get straight to the point

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
alr king!!
@ivy i'm sorry

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
if you want me so bad just say it

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
alright i want you bad

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
ok kys

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
my dearest dearest ivy im so sorry for hurting your feelings with whatever i did to upset you i have you can forgive me one day

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
charity is dead
write me a poem and die in war like a real man

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
writes down into note app

lana enthusiast 🫤
@chris that's how it works
and you get real hoes

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
"am i the only girl you're texting"
bud really said no

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
she was crazy

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
chris that's not nice

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
mb

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
@ody stop fucking glazing get in here

you're odd 🤣
i have nothing to say

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
wouldn't have neither with the name odette

you're odd 🤣
i just got here

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
"my dearest odette go make me a sandwich"

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
like okay vampire...
r u from 1864
"odette my wife im going bed you need to take care of our 5 kids, i know im just sitting in the office but you're the women this is your job and cook dinner i'm hungry"

you're odd 🤣
bye!

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
ok vampire diaries vibes...
maybe you're damon's and stefan's long lost sister

you're odd 🤣
but i want damon 🫤🫤
i can fix him 🫤🫤
he would change for me cause he really loves me 🫤🫤

tuff guy 🥱
ody wants her bother guys 🫤🫤

you're odd 🤣
NO

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️

i kinda see it

nate 😊😊
warning risk of confusion 🔥🔥

you're odd 🤣
aww guys is that a ship pic
we match so well ❤️❤️

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
isn't he your brother...

you're odd 🤣
bf*

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
makes sense now

you're odd 🤣
thanks for supporting us guys 🫤
it was really a big step to tell it the world

nate 😊😊
any chance you danced odette in swan lake??

you're odd 🤣
leave me alone

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
a swan on ice
wait doesn't that move exist
elsa just started playing in the background

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
chris you can't talk
you literally have topher in your name

you're odd 🤣
y'all already know who i am

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
im loading the gun

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
TOPHER 😡

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
someone play roblox with me rn.

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
busy

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
oh wow look at the time!
it's alr so late i better go to bed sorry liz

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
it's 2pm

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
time isn't real

lana enthusiast 🫤
no

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
@matt
@matt
@matt
@matt
@matt
@matt

tuff guy 🥱
i am NOT playing roblox with you

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
why :/

tuff guy 🥱
i've things to do

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
so more important things than spending time with me?

tuff guy 🥱
no i love spending time with you

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
then play roblox with me

tuff guy 🥱
alr
re-downloading the app

sleeping relaxo 🥺😔
YAYY

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
that gag that just left my mouth

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
why is it jealous again let them straight couples be happy

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
chris is fruity guys
the gag at a straight couple just proved it

lana enthusiast 🫤
guys waylon is doing a self reflection

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
↳  ᶜʰʳⁱˢ ⁱˢ ᶠʳᵘⁱᵗʸ ᵍᵘʸˢ
matt is my brother

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
who said i was talking about matt? (i was)
you're disgusting chris 🤢🤢🤢
where is matt he needs to see this
incest is DISGUSTING 🤮
like chris 🤣🤣

you're odd 🤣
matt's online on roblox

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
there is no way

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
waylon where are my socks
that foot fetish is getting out of control

colby jack 🗣️🤣⁉️
guys that nth for the gc
clear that in priv plz!

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
i didn't took them

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
yes you did

you're odd 🤣
🆘

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
waylon i'm gonna end you

ur bad boy waylon 😈😈
im so scared rn 🫤

nate hate 😊😊
is he okay

lana enthusiast 🫤
waylon it's been some great minutes

you're odd 🤣
he'll always be with us

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
they're tg in hell i call it

lana enthusiast 🫤
where you belong 😂!

nate 😊😊
R.I.P king waylon 😭☠️⚰️⬇️🔥👹

wanna be player so bad 🥶🥶
he'll be missed

ed sheeran DUPE 👩‍🦰🤣
no

marie speaks 🕸ᰔ!'

hi 😊😊😊
idk what this one is but
"topher" is gonna follow chris through the whole book

what do we think about the diary and past part cause im thinking about to put it more in the book??

im smirking at next chap cause that's when shits finally turning interesting