แ ป๊ซ๊ซ๊ชถแปแญขแฆ แฆ๊ชฎ๊ชฎแฆ
แ ป๊ซ๊ซ๊ชถแปแญขแฆ แฆ๊ชฎ๊ชฎแฆ (feeling good)
TRIGGER WARNING: PTSD, self-hatred, unhealthy suppressing of emotions/coping mechanisms, extreme trauma
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หโโโโพโ*ห ABOUT YOU
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ -ย @jimmyandthebadge4eva
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ - Done!
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He is tall and slim and rather bony with an androgynous, open face. He has messy, slightly long hair that was red and dark red at the roots, then faded into light blonde and dark bloodred eyes. He used to have completely light blonde hair and silverish-blue-gray eyes, but after his fall from heaven he gained the reddish roots and blood-colored eyes.
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โณ None at the moment, I think the first one fits him pretty well (complete with a black cross and scratches and white coat and black shirt!) but if you reaaaaally want me to get one I shall brave the seas of real faces for you! \^O^/
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หโโโโพโ*ห FALLEN ANGEL BACKGROUND
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โณ Mary (like the one who birthed Christ!)
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โณ Mary Di Maria (the 'di' can start with a lowercase D or an uppercase one)
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โณ Mar, M - by most common friends or acquaintances
โณ Mr. Wheelchair Therapist - by the clients who don't know his name/forgot it/just for fun
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โณ 25
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โณ 6000-9000 (he lost count after a hundred in reality)
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โณ *Cisgender* male (because I wanted to mix things up ehehehe ^v~) + he/him
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โณ Asexual Panromantic
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โณ 6'0" (I don't really know because I stand at a very small 4'11"-5 ft if I'm lucky-so please feel free to tell me if I'm wrong!)
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โณ Healthy = I have no idea because I don't even remember the last time I bothered weighing myself much less weigh one of my OCs...ย
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐: No clue. T^T
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โณ Please see BACKGROUND!
[NOTE: I know that Personality goes here next, but because you would be confused if you didn't read his backstory first I'm doing personality after the backstories. Thank you for understanding!]
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โณ PAST LIFE ONE: As a male human named Meng Xi Xiao (pronounced Mung Si Xiao). He fought in a war as a well-respected general and fell in love with the enemy general. He was executed for betrayal-one, for liking another man, and two, that man in question being the enemy-with his lover at age 28.
โณ PAST LIFE TWO: As a female human named Choyoung Lee (last name before marriage was Gao). She was arranged to be married to some other rich guy but she fell in love with a childhood friend of hers and ran away with him. She died at the ripe old age of 103 of natural causes (that is, old age) happily.
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[Creator's Note: Background One is the one I thought of first, but it seemed a bit...er, unlikely to happen so I created Background Two as a backup plan in case B1 doesn't fit. Thank you! I don't have a preference to which one gets chosen.]
Also, you said we were free to go 'all out' so buckle up your seatbelts 'cause these backstories are super long! (Well, kind of.)
โณ BACKGROUND ONE!: His mother was part of Deidamia's court, his father, part of Michael's army, and because he grew up in a very enlightened household everyone expected that he would one day go to a house like his father or mother's. After he finished training Mary went to Haniel's court, and was pretty happy there, helping people out and such. He didn't feel any particular attachment to his first human-but then she (his human) died unexpectedly of an uncurable illness. Because Mary couldn't just magically wave a hand and cure her as that would cause some suspicions among the humans, the best he could do was guide her peacefully into the afterlife. To his surprise he was soon approached with an offer to become part of Archangel Azrael's court instead of Haniel's, after the higher-up superiors saw how good he was at guiding the human into the afterlife. Now normally Mary would have declined politely because of many reasons, but there was a catch to the offer: rumor had it that Azrael was looking for a new secretary after his other one retired, and after seeing his skills the superiors thought that Mary had enough potential to fill in that position. Well, that was pretty much like a promotion, so of course-Mary took it. He expected that he would dislike the position and want to return to Haniel's court almost instantly, but to his immense surprise, he enjoyed it quite a lot. (Nothing more soothing than to know you're granting those who have died a peaceful afterlife...) Another surprise came during his time as Azrael's secretary: Mary found himself falling in love with the archangel. Now, knowing that such things were forbidden as archangels needed to focus on their very important work, he tried to suppress his feelings, but you know~ *dramatic swoon* Love, you darned fickle thing! It just wouldn't leave him alone. Mary resigned himself to his fate, since he didn't want to ruin anything, but he didn't know what to do when Azrael started showing signs of reciprocating his love-yes, we're talking about the same one, that cold and aloof archangel!
For some time, although they never confessed or anything, they just continued in contentment with their lives-as archangel and secretary, as always. But the other archangels started noticing off things with Azrael, such as the archangel neglecting work briefly and some messups with soul countings. The big tipoff was when people who were supposed to die didn't die on Earth. They became... zombies. After doing some digging (after the damage control of course), Mary was determined to be the cause of such a thing. He was dragged into trial and eventually deemed guilty of "seducing Archangel Azrael and distracting them from their very important work!". Archangel Gabriel himself wiped Azrael's memories of any feelings they might have had towards Mary, who was then promptly banished and had his wings ripped off.ย
The Nine Circles of Hell began then-or, as Mary wryly referred to it later, the Endless Torture of Creepy Voices. He doesn't know how long he fell-for all he knows, he could've been falling for a century or just a few days. But to him, it felt like forever. Forever with the voices that constantly whispering and scratching in his head, telling him it was his fault that Azrael skimped on work, his fault humans stopped dying, his fault his mother and father were ridiculed later... It was like endless torture to him, and to this day he thanks the archangel Deidamia which is who he suspects is the reason why he isn't schizophrenic currently. Finally it ended, and after taking a look around he realized he had been falling for approximately three years, in human terms. (He was in human appearances 20 at the time) But, you know, it's called 'the Endless Torture of Creepy Voices' for a reason. Mary was left so traumatized by the voices and amplified guilt and other emotions that he started killing anyone on sight who so much had the same features as Azrael and the other archangels. This caused a massive influx of dead people, and it continued for a few weeks-Mary was careful not to get caught, but he ended up establishing a rather bloody reputation for himself. Thus, he came to be known as 'the Bloody Mary'.ย
Finally, fed up with his seemingly endless killing the archangels sent Deidamia to deal with him. In secret she took away his ability to walk and soothed his pain-not enough that it would go away, heavens no!-but enough for him to take a look at what he was doing and think it over correctly. In the morning Mary was shocked when he tried to get up and immediately fell down. The soothing of Deidamia started setting in, and all of a sudden he was hit with what he called a 'revelation' later: What was the point? What was he doing, being so petty when it was his own fault to begin with? There wasn't any point in creating more work for Azrael and their court just because of his own pain... He was confined to a wheelchair soon afterwards, and after doing some more serious thinking Mary decided to pursue a job in being a therapist to 'atone for his sins'. That he did, and while every once in a while he would still end up killing people (usually at least once every six months he'd end up committing mass murder or something) being a therapist greatly helped soothe his own turmoil by focusing on other people's instead of his own. 'Course, this means he still hasn't 'cured' himself, but the archangels seem to be happy that he's not wildly on a killing spree anymore (at least not for a few months or something) so they're letting him be.
โณ BACKGROUND TWO!: Ever since he was little he liked to help people, so naturally when Mary grew up he went to Archangel Haniel's court. A bright, hard-working angel, Mary quickly rose in the ranks. He also had a little sister, Madeline, but unlike him she was more on the boisterous and brash side-she joined Gabriel's court. Much to his shock, however, she was soon banished because she had firstly fallen in love with her human, then started questioning why angels couldn't love humans in the first place. Such things! Utterly unacceptable! Horrified after watching his sister get banished, Mary resolved to work as hard as he could so the same thing wouldn't happen to them again. (He also hoped to maybe find his sister on Earth, if he searched hard enough...) His first human was a boy named Taurus 9, and Mary immediately got why he was the one assigned to him: Taurus 9, even from a very young age, had an extremely troubled and dark life. It seemed like the god of misfortune was out for Taurus 9, because no matter how hard Mary worked Taurus 9 was never completely happy. Taurus 9 ended up leading a criminal syndicate, and when confronted about that since people don't usually go that way Haniel reassured Mary that no, it wasn't his fault, it was just supposed to be like that for some strange reason and that Mary had already done the best he could.
However, it seemed that being Taurus 9's angel meant some of his misfortune was rubbing onto him: to his horror, Mary discovered one day that he had, just like his sister before him, fallen in love with Taurus 9. He was horrified with himself because he had just done what he had sworn never to do, and was also terrified of being banished like Madeline. He tried to suppress his feelings but the more he did so and the more time he spent with Taurus 9 they started spiraling everywhere. The combined feelings of love, pain, horror, fear, and anger started simmering and boiling inside of Mary the more he tried to ignore the more they boiled. Against his better judgment, Mary started to think things that angels weren't supposed to think: Why wasn't he allowed to love whom he wanted? Who was the one that set these ridiculous laws anyways? Who said that we needed to follow them in the first place? Why do we have to?ย He didn't get anything at all. While he did his best to hide such thoughts in the presence of mind-reading angels (I assume some angels in Gabriel's court can read minds or something since they're focused on memories and messages) eventually it was getting harder and harder to control. Finally Gabriel himself noticed and, you guessed it, Mary was dragged into trial!ย
Then basically a repeat of what happened in B1 happened next. He was deemed guilty of first loving his human, second having treasonous thoughts, and third having extremely treasonous thoughts, and had his wings ripped off and fell through the Nine Circles of Hell- otherwise known as 'the Endless Torture of Creepy Voices'! This time, it was a little better because he clung onto the thought that, 'hey, I'm falling down now, maybe I can meet Madeline and Taurus 9 down there...' Still it was still very, very traumatic and when he finally stopped falling basically what happened in B1 happened again: he was left so traumatized by the voices and the fall increasing his guilt and emotions wildly that he, again, went on a little killing spree to kill anyone who looked like Madeline, Taurus 9, or the archangels. Deidamia, again, was the one to half-soothe that pain and took away his ability to walk fully, and he became a therapist. A therapist, who, every six or three months or so, still goes out and disposes of humans he doesn't like to get out his frustrations and trauma. -v-' He is still searching for his sister and Taurus 9, even to this day, and still clings onto hope he will one day find them...ย
(B2's ending is a little vague, but since it's basically the same as B1's, I thought you wouldn't want to read the same things. Tell me if you need more details!)
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โณ Before falling, Mary was pretty much your typical angel-he wasn't overly quiet or anything but he abided obediently to the rules without much question. He was your typical hardworking, gentle, a slight pushover person that you'd expect from an angel-in-training. Mary also had a rather playful streak to him, loving to poke fun with his other angels and friends occasionally and never minded an occasional break. When his sister Madeline fell (B2) he was left traumatized but instead of questioning why she even fell in the first place he just resolved to work even harder, strengthening himself. In both backstories, however, as people say: love changes people. As he struggled through his feelings he became more bitter and questioning and less angel-y in general.ย
Now, after falling, he's still pretty bitter. Mary has basically two sides: the kind therapist side and the sadistic bitter side. To people who don't know him well, he's your typical therapist: he's kind, understanding, and no matter what your problem is you just never get the feeling that he's judging you or anything. He makes an effort to help you and soothe your pains the best he can, and doesn't have any problems with setting aside other things to help people. Perhaps it's his fall that caused that, or maybe it's his angel times still somewhere inside him no matter how much he wants to ignore it. Whatever it is it's those traits that make him a good therapist-a valued one in fact! (He took psychology, which helped, though) To people who know him better, that is, people who aren't clients, like his personal assistant Jeanne (pronounced Gee-anne), he comes off as this tired guy who acts way older than he looks. He can insufferably annoying and lazy when he wants to be and knows the best ways to get on your nerves to reveal your true intentions (he's really good at cold readings, in order not to get scammed) Mary also has a nasty habit of, when he's disinterested in things, literally won't do it unless forcefully forced and even if he is forced he'll do it passively-aggressively (another thing he's good at: passive-aggressiveness.) He can also be forgetful and, as Jeanne puts it, "A mystery. A very complete mystery." Poor Jeanne, always roped into being the one to account for him whenever he's slacking off (there's literally a sign in her office that reads: Days Since Mary-Sensei's Last Slack-Off. His record is 100), so much so that she literally has a key to his apartment and knows all of his passwords because she actually needs it.ย
His true side, though, is very much befitting of the fallen angel he is. He refuses to make any close emotional attachments to anyone-anyone at all-anymore for fear he'll end up hurting them like he did to Azrael and Taurus 9. (In fact, the closest person he's had in ages is probably Jeanne but that's only because without her he'd probably be in a ditch somewhere like 'Help meeeeeee...' without doing anything) He is extremely bitter and hates rules even to this day. He hates the feeling of being restrained or 'chained down' by things he cannot see-for example, rules. There is a good reason that Mary was called 'the Bloody Mary' by those who were victim of his murdering-he was absolutely merciless when killing and still is. He's harsh and sadistic and more cunning that he appears, mostly fooling everyone with his disability and therapist side. When he's angry if someone tries to reason with him, unless they're close with him he'll just get more angry because he hates sympathy towards him and will usually lash out to them. But normally he appears pretty stable, a friendly albeit slightly weird person.
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โณ Cornelia (mother, alive), Elijah (father, hasn't seen him since he was a toddler because Elijah's in the army) Madeline (little sister, human age 21 age of death)
[NOTE: Madeline only exists in B2.]
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โณ 50/100 (it'd be lower but you would be surprised a lot of it has been somewhat eased away by being a therapist. That is, read 'eased' as 'locked and suppressed away'.)
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โณ Mary chews on his thumbnail when he's thinking or nervous (mostly when he's thinking) often making them bleed, he likes to play with a pen when thinking as well. He also has this bad habit of whenever somebody annoys/makes him angry he immediately adds them to his 'kill later' list, but he's trying to get himself out of this habit. (Key word: trying.)
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โณ He likes to collect random things from everywhere, every time he goes to a new place he gets something from that place-it could be anything, even trash, just to prove to himself he's been there. There's a whole bulletin board of it hung up in his bedroom.
โณ In heaven, he had a hobby of observation; that is watching others practice their superhuman abilities (not in a creepy way though) because he found it fascinating. (This skill of his actually helps his therapist work today)
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โณ helping other people's problems, reading, watching the sunset/sunrise/night sky, getting new books, talking out his problems to the night sky, sunshine, wearing black and white, some sort of peace and quiet, planning (occasionally), testing out new things like food and sometimes clothes, sometimes likes meeting new people, getting rid/disposing of the people he dislikes, understanding things, Madeline, Azrael, Taurus 9
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โณ the archangels he doesn't like, admitting weakness (both to himself and to others), getting treated delicately or thought to be weak because of his disability, cunning and manipulative people who play with others just for their own fun, being the center of attention, shopping, going out in general, not understanding things
๐ ๐๐๐๐ - The Nine Circles of Hell, falling (both literally and emotionally and mentally), slightly afraid of dogs, the archangels and the power they hold over him/everyone else
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โณ As a therapist he mainly dresses in a long white lab or doctor's lab coat. But he wears a black dress shirt and pants under that because he claims it's 'calming'. He even dresses like this during normal days because he claims he's 'too lazy' to go shopping for anything else. (literally like his entire closet is hung up with varieties of the same outfit...)
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หโโโโพโ*ห SUPER POWERS
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โณ Flight: 8/10
Superhuman Strength: 4/10
Telekinesis: 9/10
Immortality: 10/10
Invulnerability: 6/10
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โณ Since his line of work doesn't quite require any of his powers, now when he's calm he uses them for idle things-like using telekinesis to get water or his coat, or using invulnerability when he accidentally spills something hot on himself so he doesn't burn, things like that. (Telekinesis is his most refined power because when he's alone he uses it to get the things he can't get, being in a wheelchair and all) Despite the fact he doesn't use them much for bad things on a daily basis, Mary does use his powers when time comes for his little killing spree. TvT'
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หโโโโพโ*ห RELATIONSHIPS
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โณ Although Mary respects Michael because he knows his army keeps Heaven safe, out of all the archangels he dislikes Michael the most because Michael was one that fought the hardest for his banishment, both times.
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โณ B1: While Deidamia didn't try and help him during the trial, she did kind of speak up for him kindly, and she was also that suspected warm whisper in his ear while he fell to Earth keeping him kind-of sane, so Mary doesn't hate her completely. He's grateful that she kept him sane.
โณ B2: Mary really likes Deidamia. That's one archangel that he even as a fallen angel doesn't hate all that much. Okay so maybe he's a bit biased because she was the one who helped his sister when she became a fallen angel, but she never minds when he rambles on and on to her either.
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โณ B1: Mary doesn't like Gabriel all that much because he was the one that wiped Azrael's memories-even though Mary wasn't even sure if Azrael was real about their feelings or anything, he was still their secretary for some time and it wasn't fun to witness that right in front of his face, like one final nail to his coffin to make things a little worse before-oh look! Nine circles of hell!
โณ B2: Mary thinks that Gabriel... needs to become more serious... He liked to joke and chat with Gabriel, but his opinion of Gabriel lessened when, obviously Gabriel was the one to drag him into trial, and when he got deemed guilty all Gabriel did when he got banished was stand by with an apologetic smile and say "That's rough buddy, hope to see you when you rise again." So yeah. Nothing that hurts more when a person you thought was your friend just stands by as you get b a n i s h e d. (Especially when it was that person who caused your banishment, kind of)
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โณ As his court leader, Haniel's about on the same level as Deidamia, though maybe a little less. But it was his time in Haniel's court that made Mary want to become a therapist. Although he's a bit bitter that Haniel didn't try and help him all the way when he became a fallen (granted, Haniel's only one voice in seven)
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โณ B1: Even though Mary went through the Nine Circles of Hell, he doesn't-he can't-bring himself to hate Azrael. They were a little beacon of light, if only for a short amount of time, and Mary will always think of them as 'his one and only brightest star in the night sky'. He misses them greatly and when he's feeling especially depressed goes out to an empty field, stares up at the sky and just talks.
โณ B2: Mary doesn't have much thought on the cold, aloof court leader since the court he works in is completely different from his, and they never really talked or anything. And as Azrael didn't try to help or anything, he's about on the same level as Gabriel and Michael.
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โณ Yes, por favor! (Please see: Background)
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หโโโโพโ*ห ENDING
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โณ UM. Dark red....? Gold...? Light yellow...?
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โณ Leo by Eve MV (English cover)
https://youtu.be/eeDEvbnqWSU
โณ (Original Japanese cover)
https://youtu.be/J3K3V36mlLM
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โณ "So... you first got disowned by your parents because you were lesbian, then slighted by your lover, then when you caught her cheating on your she pretended she didn't know who you were, then you turned to drinks, and now here we are... Wow, did somebody copy and paste our lives or what? Kidding, kidding! Kind of."
โณ "Is it possible to hate and love love at the same time? I think it's possible. Love makes us feel like we could do anything, love tears us apart, love stitches us back together, love shatters you into pieces, and it glues you back together. How fickle it is and how fickle it will stay."
โณ "For the last time, NO! Being in a wheelchair doesn't mean I'm weak, okay?! Say that again and you're automatically moving to the top of my list of people I need to ki-uhhhhh people I need to kindle a better spirit into!"
โณ "It hurt when I fell from heaven, but I think what hurt the most were the rules that had been so crazily imposed upon us that had caused that pain in the first place."
โณ *another client thinks he's a girl* "You thought I was a girl...? You should join the long long loooong list of people I have that have believed that. Oh, and this might be TMI but yeah I'm a virgin like the original Mary, I can't do much in my wheelchair now can I-whoops we're getting off topic, please tell me what your problems are and ignore my TMI!"
๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐? No, I don't think so!
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โณ I kind of want Lilith and Mary to meet because one of her friends recommended him as a therapist to her, then they both realize 'Oh we're both fallen angels!!'. But I don't want to force anything upon you, so, it's completely up to you! (Oh and another thing that would be good is if he found Madeline again and they became two therapists together that would be nice ^ ^)
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โณ A. *throws self at your feet* You are an absolute goddess/god for giving me this form and limiting my work. I LOVE YOU FOREVER- Also it's nice to meet another person who's got three applyfics! Like me! (Actually I have more but they're not all active let's just bypass that-) B. Please tell me if I missed anything, if I need to change anything, and once more I apologize for the swarm of questions I have bombarded you with TvT'
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โณhi! thank you for taking your time to complete this big form of mine! sorry for making it so long! you can call me aimee (:
(That works for me because one of my favorite and most bad*** female characters in a comic I read/am reading is called Aimee~)
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หโโโโพโ*ห THANK YOU AND WELCOME TO EARTH. WE
HOPE YOU GET YOUR
WINGS BACK.
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Thank you for reading!
-awakened-angel-chan (ironically considering what this form is about XD haha)
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