After helping Zinnia with the chores and spending some time with my girls, I drove to his apartment. The same apartment where we danced like we were non compos mentis and where we reunited for a journey that changed my life forever. A journey that was filled with euphoric moments that made me cross fingers on 'happily ever after' until Danish decided to choke me with his hidden bitter secrets. 

I took deep breaths to keep my tears at bay. The polished mahogany door of his house was enough for the memories to barge in savagely, making me all tear up, which I hated with the core of my being. 

Seriously, can my tears get a freaking break?!

I pressed the doorbell and waited for his arrival. A second bell followed as it took a few minutes to see the man I was longing to open the door. After waiting for another few minutes, I rang the bell for the third time and when I saw no response from the other side, I gave up and twisted the door handle, which to my surprise, was unlocked. I opened the door a bit and peered inside. There were no lights but the one coming from the balcony, which I assumed to be, that paved the way. 

"Danish," I called him out with the steps I took to his living room. "Dan," I called again to which I got silence as a reply. 

The whole atmosphere was kind of eerie with the lights off and quietude and hush. I followed the source of light and my assumption was right, it led me to the balcony. I entered the balcony and seeing a figure from the corner of my eyes, I turned to my left to see Danish who was catching some Zs on a long rocking chair. 

I smiled at his sleeping figure out of habit, the slightly parted lips and messy hair falling over his eyes. I stood for a few minutes at my spot, liking what I was seeing. But then, as my life hated seeing me smile for even a fraction of a second, my mind went back to where he screwed up everything. 

I tore my gaze from his angelic yet sinful face and took deep breaths to calm my nerves. After making sure I had regained my long lost composure, I walked towards him and called his name. As it was vain, I gently patted on his shoulder to which he squeezed his eyes in exasperation. He raised his head and looked at me through his droopy eyelids. Upon seeing me, he blinked and rubbed his eyes for a few seconds. I knew he couldn't believe that I was in flesh in front of him and that he might get confused between dream and reality. 

"Yeah, it's me for real. I'm right here," I said to which he looked at me sternly. "What?"

"Y-you...here...wh-why...how? Like wh-when you came? Who opened the door?" he stuttered and spewed nonsense to which I sighed.

"Are you high?" I asked to which he poked his chin out. "Are you high on weed or sleep Danish?" I asked again to which he shook his head.

"No. I'm fine."

"Good. Come inside," I said and turned my heels. "We need to talk."

He followed me to the kitchen like a lost puppy. His gestures were enough to prove that my presence was definitely an unexpected bombshell. We walked into his kitchen. I opened the refrigerator and took a bottle of water while Danish leaned on the marble slab behind me. 

I was no Medusa to have eyes behind my head but I couldn't be wrong if I said Danish had his eyes on me, not leaving from the moment he got up from his kip. But as usual, I shut my eyes to it. As I got a bottle and opened the cap, I took a look at him. 

As much as I hate to say this, he was a literal mess. His grown beard, disheveled hair that had visible knots and rumpled outfit of a grey shirt that was buttoned wrongly and a white trouser that had stains of coffee and whatnot. Maybe he noticed my eyes on his and that was why he went through his hair to set it up somehow pleasant. 

I looked away and took gulps from the bottle, letting the chilled water run down my throat. After quenching my thirst, I closed the bottle and placed it back. But when I stood straight after closing the refrigerator and turned around to look at him, I saw something that twisted my heart in pain. 

Large globules of hot tears made their way down to his bearded chin and those dropped to the floor with a splosh. The continuous stream of tears trailed down his cheeks which made me worried for him. Heavy sobs left his mouth as he gripped onto the slab. 

"Dan..."

"I'm sorry, Elka. I'm so sorry."

Saying that, he dropped down to the floor just like his tears, making me run towards him. He sat with his hunched shoulders that were shaking uncontrollably. I squatted beside him and cupped his face with my small soft hands which were instantly hovered by his large manly ones. 

"I'm s-sorry, Elka. I-I didn't mean to...I-I can't without y-you..." he said through his sobs.

"Shhh...it's fine," I said, holding him closer to me, his head leaning on my shoulder. I could feel the wetness of his tears that made patches on my thin faded black tee. 

"Do-don't leave me, Elka. Please..."

I closed my eyes and bit my lips before saying, "I will not, Dan."

»»---------------------►

I have loved you for the last time
Is it a video? Is it a video?
I have touched you for the last time
Is it a video? Is it a video?

Sufjan Stevens' Visions Of Gideon playing on repeat in the background and Danish in my arms as we laid together on his bed, with his side face on my bosom and my hands going through his thick black locks. What more could I ask for?

His head moved at the pace of my breathing while the pads of my fingers moved tantalizingly, making Danish's eyes flutter and leaning into my touch for more. His arm was wrapped around my waist while the other one was interlocked with my free hand. I turned my head and looked out of the window. 

Sun winked goodbye to the world 45 minutes ago, making room for the moon to shine along with its pals, the stars. The dark blue sky with glitters knocked over, elevated this moment even more. I smiled to myself thinking about everything. The song, the night airglow and the guy I was with.

"Elka," Danish called, making me look down at him. "I'm sorry."

I looked at him for a few seconds and nodded with a sly smile. 

"I'm really sorry for hurting you. I never ever had any intentions of hurting you. It's just..."

"Dan, you can explain everything later. When you are comfortable. Now, take rest," I said.

"No Elka." He shook his head. "I can't take rest when I'm in your arms and soothing me when all I did was hurt you. I can't."

"Dan, you have done a lot more for me. You made me feel the essence of love after four years of fearing it."

His grip on my waist tightened as he pulled me closer and buried his head deeper. 

"I was a jerk," Danish said after a few seconds. 

"I was a jerk who loved attention and fame. The whole college knew who I was with my looks, money and more importantly, the way I played with girls. I never wanted to be in a relationship because I found myself enjoying and seeking pleasure by sleeping with different girls, every day. No one was there to point out my wrongdoings or correct me. All I had were some friends who supported me for being an asshole. They befriended me because of my money and power and not because of who I am. I was too late to understand that."

I stayed silent and listened to his story. Now, it was my time to listen to his past and to be there for him- the roles had reversed. 

"And then she came. Aesha Manzil from India. She was an international student, a very timid and quiet one. Many asked her out but she turned down everyone. Maybe that was what made me challenge myself. I challenged myself that I would sleep with her and I did it. I first made friends with her and then we hung out more than often and then one night, after my friend's party, I did it. I never thought she would fall in love with me. But when she confessed in front of the whole college, ego got the best of me and I rejected her in front of everyone. I felt really bad when I saw tears in her eyes because she indeed was a good friend to me. But I put those sentimental emotions aside for the sake of my fucking reputation and joined others for the schadenfreude."

"You're a fucking bastard," I said, my voice calm so ever.

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Be sorry to that girl, Dan. You made her cry just because she loved you. How pathetic!"

"I am. I am sorry to her. Not a day passes without me praying for her well being and asking for forgiveness."

"As if!"

"Elka, please..."

I sighed. 

"Don't mind me. It's just the heat of the moment."

"Ok," he muttered. 

"Then why did you move here? Leaving all your power and fame behind?" I asked. 

"When Daniel broke the news of his sickness to us, mom, dad and grandma were in a turmoil. Daniel has always been their favorite son and I don't have even an ounce of jealousy because he has been the best brother ever. And the mere thought of losing him made me go insane. I couldn't be a good son to my parents and the good one is leaving them, so soon. I thought I had to hold everything together before it collapsed. I decided overnight that I would leave Auckland for good and live with my brother. And that's how I came here. I came here for a change. A change for myself."

Danish was once a bad guy, a fuckboy who didn't care about others feelings but only knew how to play with it. He made mistakes that would make anyone scrunch their nose up in disgust. But when he began to face the reality of misfortune, he decided to change for himself for the best. He left everything and came to live with his brother who believed that he would die anytime. He came here and became his spine and glee. He wanted to change for his life ahead, letting the guilt and regret eat him up alive. He had endured enough. The retribution had done more than enough to him and now, it was time for redemption. And that was why I was here. 

If he was guilty of what he did, then surely he could have a second chance. With his dying brother on one side, it would be hard for him to lose someone he loved. And me being that someone, who had seen all sides of him, couldn't put him into anymore misery. He needed someone to hold when he felt his whole world was flipping over. He held me when I was on the brink of falling from a cliff and now, it was my time to hold him. It was Elka's time to hold Danish. 

For the love, for laughter, I flew up to your arms
Is it a video? Is it a video?
For the love, for laughter, I flew up to your arms
Is it a video? Is it a video?
Is it a video?

"I wanted to change. And that thought just intensified when I saw you, Elka."

He wiped off his tears before it could fall on my t-shirt. He looked at me, our eyes hooked after 21 days, mixed emotions arousing in us. 

"The day I saw you, your smile, it was like I found a rowboat in the midst of tidal waves. You are that one thing that's constantly pushing me to go forward against everything that weighs me down. You have that charm beaming in you and you unknowingly made me a sucker for that, for you, Elka."

I licked my lips and gulped the lump that was formed in my throat. 

"You made me smile, laugh and be happy even with your cute little gestures and because of you, I was able to make my brother happy. I wanted to tell you about my past but whenever I prepared myself, a fear crawled up to my mind. Fear of losing you, fear of not being in your arms, fear of not seeing you. I love you so fucking much that I feared of losing you goddamnit. Because I know that if you leave me, I will be back to broken pieces and that's the last thing I want to happen. We both need each other because we love each other and we don't care about losing our sanity when we are in each other's arms. And that's all I need, Elka. You, me and our small crazy world of annoying, squabbling, movie nights, Whoopee and mending each other."

I looked at him intensely before breaking into tears with his last words as it was something I wanted after three fucking weeks of melancholia. His words were such a painkiller for the blues. 

Danish propped himself on elbows and looked at me who was lying down and crying.

Even if it meant that the world was against me with thunder and storms and hurricanes, I knew one thing for sure. I would never get a guy who loved me this much. He had done a lot for me when he himself was suffering and trying to fight battles that made him weaker. He had his own problems but never mentioned it as he knew I had a lot on my plate. He helped me conquer my demon when he was bleeding in silence. He muffled his cries for the sake of me. He put me on top of his priority and claimed me so openly and proudly. 

Why should I see only his flaws when he tried to make me flawless? Why should I remember only his past when he tried to make me forget mine? Why should I let go of a man who wasn't hesitant to show his endless love for me? His infinite love for a philophobic?

"Elka?"

"I love you."

Danish was taken aback. Never in a million years he thought he would get to hear those three words from me, not this soon. But when I did, his spirits flew away, only to come back with bliss. His agaped mouth slowly broke into a smile. 

"Wha-what?"

"You heard me you twit, I love you!" I said as I wiped off those tears.

Suddenly I felt a heaviness on my body, as Danish literally jumped on me and hugged me tight. It took a few seconds for my brain to interpret what was happening, before I wrapped my arms around his shoulder and pulled him closer, if that was possible. 

His face was in the crook of my neck as he whispered, "I'm sorry. I promise to myself that I'll never ever hurt you and love you with all my heart and soul. I love you, Elka Alastair."

I smiled softly at his vow before whispering in his ears, "If you fuck this second chance, that's it my boy. I'll take away your heart and soul and put it in a burning furnace. Also, I love you too, Danish Rivera."

He retreated from the hug but was still hovering over me and said with his beautiful smile, "You already have my heart and soul, my sunflower."

I chuckled lightly and looked at him straight into his dark brown orbs. The proximity, position and confession made the air around us a tad tense. Our breathing became irregular all of a sudden. The tension was building up with each and every second passing by, our eyes not leaving each other's.

I heedlessly bit my lower lip and his eyes went from mine to my lips that were between my teeth. Danish leaned forward to which I didn't push him away. Seeing my reaction he came closer and tugged my bottom lip with his thumb and brushed the edges of my lip. His hot breath was feathering my lips as I moved forward to feel him. Our lips brushed against each other's and he asked, "May I?"

I have loved you for the last time
Visions of Gideon, visions of Gideon
And I have kissed you for the last time
Visions of Gideon, visions of Gideon

I nodded my head with closed eyes as I couldn't form words at that moment. The next thing I knew was his lips were on mine. Those thin pink lips pressed onto my small pouty ones. The warmth exuding from my body and the tinglish feeling on my abdomen were all new to me. He leaned more closer making our lips press together as if they were two pieces of jigsaw puzzle that must be matched to make an image out. Just like that, we matched our lips to paint the picture of our love.

Goddess of love smiled upon us as I wished for this moment to last. I wished to dwell in this moment for eternity. I wished the world to stop spinning and time to stop ticking. Danish slowly pulled away as I opened my eyes to see he was all smiles with a peculiar twinkle in his eyes. 

But before we could get time to regain the stability of our breath, I pulled him into another kiss by his shirt collar. Even though my eyes were shut, I could say that he was goggle-eyed. Without wasting a second, Danish gripped my waist and pulled me closer while my hands found their way to his nape and then to his hair. Our lips crashed onto each other as we sucked and tugged on each other with our noses bumping. I grabbed and pulled a handful of his hair to which he groaned. He titled his head and his hand moved to the back of my head to deepen the heated kiss. 

"You're so fucking addicting," he said between the kiss. "I can't have enough of you, Elka."

"Then don't," I said. "Kiss me, Danish. Show me what I missed all these days."

With that, his skilful work on my lips escalated. What started from a sweet innocent kiss turned into a wild and heated makeout session. And the fact that I took the initiative made me pat myself. If I didn't, I wouldn't know my body was yearning for his touch, the way my body was responding to his touch and the pooling sensation of wetness between my legs which were so foreign to me. 

After a few minutes of tasting the sweetness of my lips, he left it and went towards my neck and nibbled sensually on the skin there. His tongue lightly grazed on my skin to which I shuddered. He bit on a particular area of my neck which caused my back to arch even more and to cover my mouth with the back of my hand, to stop any sounds coming from me. I felt him smirking seeing my response and smiling at his victory of finding my sweet spot, something that drove me crazy with pleasure. He held my hand by wrist and moved it away from my mouth. 

"Don't hide them, love. Let me hear those," he said and continued doing his work of art on my neck. 

I didn't care if he was going to leave some fresh purple hickeys. I always wondered how my neck would look with the hickeys decorated when I saw Lily's neck covered with them. 

After a few more kissing, nibbling and sucking, he pulled back and stared at the love bites he gave me, with his finger running over them. 

"They look beautiful on you," he said, admiring his artistry on the canvas of my skin. 

I smiled at him as he leaned forward and connected our lips again in a passionate, slow but rough kiss. My lips that had only swore, yelled and backfired all these years made sinful yet magical sounds. My moans and my squirming form made Danish go even more wild and crazy as he trailed down to my breasts and landed between my bazoom valley. His face disappeared between them as I arched my back and moaned his name.

"Dan..."

He kissed my boob over the thin and flimsy material while his other hand gently fondled its twin. His tongue swirled on my hardened bundle of nerves which made my head throw back onto his pillow. My hands left his hair and gripped his shoulder due to the utmost pleasure he was giving me while my toes curled.

He went down further and reached my belly. He pulled up the tee and caressed my belly with his fingertips, sending shivers down my spine. He placed soft open mouth kisses on my belly and abdomen with his fingers running over my v-lines. The sweet and pleasurable torture went on for a few minutes, me being a moaning mess under my lover. I gripped onto his biceps even harder, letting him know that I was seeing the moon gate of heaven. I felt his fingers leaving my waist and going further down, to my sweatpants and tucked the waistband of it. But before he could pull it down, I stopped him.

"So-sorry. I got carried away. I'm so sorry baby," he apologized through his erratic breath, avoiding my eyes. 

I smiled before sitting up straight, catching my breath with Danish between my legs. I could understand. He had tried with every bone in him to not make a move when we were dating. He knew how nervy I could be with just one unexpected kiss. But today, when I let him, it was normal for him to get  carried away because I knew that I was an addiction for him. An addiction that could make him lose his lucidity with just one mere touch. It was not just him after all. Even I lost the control I had on me when my lips met his.

I caressed his face lovingly to which he held my hand and planted a long kiss on my palm.

"It's fine. We have time, Dan," I said to which he smiled and leaned forward to plant a kiss on my lips and then pasted our foreheads.

"Yes, we have time. We are gonna be together from this day to our very last breath. I swear on my life I'll never leave you but will only love you. I love you, my sunflower."

"I love you too, Dan."

For the love, for laughter, I flew up to your arms
Is it a video? Is it a video?
For the love, for laughter, I flew up to your arms
Is it a video? Is it a video?
Is it a video?

For the love, for laughter, I flew up to your arms
Is it a video? Is it a video?
For the love, for laughter, I flew up to your arms
Is it a video? Is it a video?
Is it a video?