I reached home. My home. But that word sounded so foreign to me. 

I was tapping my fingers on the steering wheel, waiting for the automatic gate to open enough for my car to enter. They painted the house white again, something my dad did yearly to maintain his mansion as an exemplar of his extravagance.

After parking my car in the huge spacious garage, I took my bag from the backseat and walked towards the entrance. Standing in front of the large wooden doors, I rang the bell. 

"Coming..." I heard my mom saying from inside, her footsteps getting louder. 

She opened the door and her face beamed with happiness and excitement while my face was expressionless. 

"Elka, my sweetheart," she said and hugged me tightly for a few seconds. 

The lavender scent that she carried from the day I remember hit my nostrils, the satisfying yet powerful fragrance stifling my lungs sparingly.

I hugged her timidly and let go but she was still hugging, hindering my breath. 

"I missed you so much."

"If you keep on hugging me like this, you're gonna miss me forever," I managed to say.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she pulled back, apologizing. "I got carried away with happiness. You look great dear!"

Really? 

"Thanks. Can I?"

"Yeah, yeah sure. Come in," she moved aside and paved the way for me to enter.

I entered my house and walked towards the living room. It had been eight months since I left this place and I didn't even miss it a bit. My home was where they were. My home was where Lily and Zinnia were.

"A new one?" I asked my mom, pointing to the large, stupendous chandelier that hung from the eggshell white ceiling, sparkling due to the sunlight radiating through the opposite glass windows. 

My mom nodded before saying, "Yeah, your father fancies it."

"Not something new. Where's Pappy and Dad?" I asked, turning towards her. 

"Pappy is in the tree house and your dad, maybe in the backyard or in his office," she answered. 

"Maybe? You don't know where dad is?" I asked with squinted eyes. 

"I-I was busy in the kitchen. I don't know, Elka. Why don't you go to your room and freshen up?" she said, diverting the talk. 

"Yeah, sure," I said, nodding my head and climbing stairs to my room. 

I opened the door of my room and entered. Everything looked the same, untouched. It was clean, not having the tiniest mote of dust.

I sighed and plopped down on my bed and stretched, making my muscles loose. Even if I didn't miss this house, I surely did miss my bed. It felt like floating on clouds when lying on this queen size mattress. I laid for sometime and got up to freshen up. I washed my face and put on some comfy clothes before climbing down the stairs and walking towards the kitchen. 

As soon as I entered the kitchen, someone shoved a bowl of whipped cream right on my face, making my body freeze at that spot. 

The bowl was off my face as I heard someone say, "This is for not contacting me all this time." 

Then a jar of juice was poured over my head before the same voice saying, "This is for not coming to visit me all this time."

A bag of flour over my head and shoulders made it even more wow. Just like a cherry on top. 

"And this one is for not hugging me as soon as you came."

I wiped the cream off my eyes and opened my eyes half to see my grandpa, keeping the flour bag on the counter and turning towards me. 

"What the- seriously, Pappy? This is what I get for driving my ass for one and a half hours here? Just to see you?" I yelled at him.

"Well, I told you the reasons for my doings dear. Not that I'm sorry," Pappy said.

And then he flipped the bird. 

Even though he appeared to be a cute old man, Pappy was nowhere near to being sweet. Pappy was an old rowdy. He was way too savage for his age. Even though he was turning eighty, his mind was eighteen. Not gonna lie, he was a bad influence on me. He introduced me to the word fuck when I was ten and instead of helping me to balance on bicycle, he taught me to raise my middle finger which I actually did to my dad, as I didn't like the way he told me to get out of his office when he was having a meeting with his business partners. I called my mom a bitch when I was fifteen during a family reunion, to which everyone scolded and looked down on me while Pappy went to a corner and muffled his laughter. He knew exactly what made me do that and that was why he stood up for me when everyone was coming at me saying I was a disrespectful child. And that was exactly why I loved him.

"You are a pain in the ass." I retorted. 

"That's what your grandma used to tell....until night. You know what I mean?" Pappy asked, wriggling his white eyebrows.

"Eww!"

"Oh God, Elka. What happened?" my mom asked, running towards me as soon as she walked into the kitchen and saw her daughter like a fucking scarecrow covered in bird shit. 

She immediately took me to the sink and washed my face. I could hear my Pappy laughing and my mom cursing under her breath. She would've said right to his face but since pappy was her father-in-law, she didn't want any trouble. And with that, she knew Pappy was not at all a person who gave two shits about anyone or anything so it was useless anyways. She knew from where I got the IDGAF attitude. 

About five minutes later, my face was all washed and dried but my hair and chest were still shabby.

"Turn around, my angel. Let your grandpa see that pretty face of yours," Pappy said, joshing me. 

I turned around and looked at him, my eyelashes still wet with residues of cream and flour sticking on it. 

"You said you missed me right?" I asked him to which he nodded. "Then you don't mind if I give you a hug right now, do you?" I asked, taking steps towards him, giving off some Slytherin vibes. 

Now I'm the bad guy.

Pappy's face was twisted with confusion and dismay. 

"Wh-what? Go and clean yourself," he said, taking steps back and shooing me away.

"No, I can't wait to give a big fat giant hug as I missed you so much."

Pappy turned his heels and ran around the counter. But those old, weak legs betrayed him as I caught him fast, turned him around and hugged, making the flour and juice and the cream on my hair to get stamped on his clothes and side of his face. 

He was squirming and struggling to escape from my hug but nothing worked. He wasn't amnesiac to not remember that his granddaughter was a real badass. 

"Enough, Elka. Let me go. I'm sorry," he pleaded. 

I hugged him for sometime, making sure everything got imprinted on his clothes and let go. 

He looked down at his clothes and then at me before saying, "Fuck you, my angel with corna."

»»---------------------►

I took a shower again and slipped into some comfy clothes that were already in my wardrobe. I decided to take a nap as I was a bit tired. 

I woke up to mom knocking on my door, telling me it was dinnertime. I put on my flops and went downstairs to the kitchen to see pappy, dad and mum already dined.

"Elka! Where were you? Why didn't you come and see me when you came here?" my dad asked as soon as he saw me. 

My dad sit with his usual attire of a white shirt beneath a sweater, brown slacks and a pair of relaxed but elegant shoes. He dyed his white streaks of hair and beard black, making him look younger than my mom.

"I was a bit tired and even if I came, you would be busy with your work, right?" I asked, dragging the chair and sat next to mom while Pappy and dad sat across from us. 

Hearing my response, my dad smiled faintly at me and nodded his head as he knew what I said was true nevertheless. 

"Let's eat now. Elka, here's your lasagna," my mom said and served me some. 

I looked at pappy who was looking at me with narrowed eyes and pursed lips playfully. I also looked at him with the same expression and we were like two cats that were going to jump on each other any time. 

"The game's not over yet, angel," he said.

"I know!" I snapped. 

My mom and dad looked at each other for a split second and then dug into their plates. 

We started eating. It was silent, as usual. 

"So, how are your friends? The ones living in your house?" my dad asked out of nowhere. 

I looked at him from my plate and said, "You could've said the ones living with me rather than making them sound like some PGs. And yes, they are fine."

"Valid," Pappy said, taking a sip from his wine. 

"They have been living with you for free for the past seven months in a house that I bought for you. Do you know how much I spend on that house?" he asked me, clearly not liking my response. 

As if I care!

"I don't know about that but I know it's nothing for you when comparing to how much you spend on that new chandelier of yours. And also, they aren't living for free. They make food for me, they look after me when I'm sick, they take care of me and moreover, they give me free love. Something I actually missed during my childhood," I said. 

My dad fell silent again. My mom froze in her seat and Pappy nodded his head. My dad was going to tell me something but just then he got a call, making him take it and leave the dining table. 

I shook my head and continued to eat. Fifteen minutes passed and still, my dad didn't come while we all finished eating and was waiting for him. I was talking to Pappy as he asked me about Lily and Zinnia. He knew them well as I told him a lot about them and he loved Lily and Zinnia already even though he hadn't met them. My mom stayed silent and listened to me talking. 

After a few seconds, my dad came and walked past us saying blankly, "I'm done."

We three looked at him walking away from the dining hall and vanishing into his office.

I looked at Pappy and then at my mom.

"This is exactly what I meant when I asked you if I get to spend time with you both together," I said and got up from my chair and headed to my room, ignoring my mom's calling. 

»»---------------------►

I put on some lo-fi music on my bluetooth speaker before plopping down on my bed and stared at the lavender colored ceiling. 

I knew that this would happen. This was bound to happen. I closed my eyes, letting the memories take me to my childhood days. 

A girl with curly hair that was tangled for days as she didn't have anyone to brush it for her, standing at the window with her small, soft fingers wrapped around the metal rails. The sight of her mom getting into a car with a big suitcase, she harshly throwing it in the trunk, and driving off, leaving the house along with her daughter, still lingered on her mind. Her father, cursing her mom and getting back to his business as if nothing happened and unacknowledging the presence of his one and only daughter, broke that five years old girl's small innocent heart even more. Her grandfather taking her in his arms and going to the small tree house they built together for fun was her only escape and relief in the middle of all that chaos. 

A tear slipped making me open my eyes. 

No wonder why I'm a fucking philophobic. 

»»---------------------►

I woke up the next day, brushed my teeth, did the morning routines and went downstairs. I saw Pappy brewing coffee. I back hugged him which startled him a bit. 

"Oh, you scared me! Good morning angel," he said, turning his head and kissing my forehead. 

"Morning, Pappy. Is this for me?" I asked as I saw him pouring the coffee into a mug. 

"If you want," he said, turning and handing the mug to me. 

"Thanks," I said, taking it from him.

Right then, mom walked into the kitchen and seeing me, she said, "Good morning, sweetie. I made French Crepes for you. Come, sit here."

I nodded at her and took a seat. While I was eating the crepes, Pappy said, catching my attention, "Angel, I'll be in our tree house, ok?"

"Yeah, ok. I'll come after finishing this," I said. 

He nodded his head and left the kitchen through the back door and went to the backyard with the help of his walking stick. 

After finishing the breakfast, I went to the tree house. Everything was the same. The small comfy bed and the green bean bag, the books that rested on the small wooden shelves, the mini fridge, our favourite board games and of course, the small tent we built years ago. There were also polaroids of me and pappy that hung on a wire across the room. I saw Pappy sitting on the bean bag and reading his favorite novel, 'Things Fall Apart'. I lowered my head and entered the house and sat on the bed, next to the bean bag.

Pappy put his book down and smiled at me before caressing my hair. 

"How are you, angel?" he asked me.

"I'm fine," I smiled. 

"But you don't look like that." 

"I'm fine, Pappy. I'm happy after years. You know how I was when I was here eight months ago, right?"

"I know. I know everything, my girl. And that's exactly why I supported your decision of moving out. You deserve the best," he said, showing off his cute toothless smile. 

I held his wrinkled hands that were on the side of my face and said, "Thank you. I don't know what I am gonna do when you die, which is gonna be anytime soon I guess."

I let out a chuckle seeing how his face changed. 

"You heartless lady!" he said, pulling my ear. "You're the one who's going to kiss the grave first as I'm going to beat you to death."

I laughed at his rude but cute remark before punching his round belly playfully. 

»»---------------------►

Three days passed before I knew it. On these days, me and Pappy visited grandma's grave and then his estate, went to the hospital together for his check-up, went fishing and spent the rest of the time in our small tree house reading and talking. I wanted to tell him about Danish but if I did then he would worry about me and my phobia. Of all the people I was close to, he was the only one that could truly understand me as he had seen what I went through. But I didn't want to worry him, so I kept mum about it. 

I ignored my parent's presence the entire time. My mom was trying hard to make me talk to her and build a mother-daughter relationship, which should have been there from the moment I was born. She was trying hard to make it upto me for all these years. But it was too late. I didn't even smile at her, much less talk. The pain she was feeling now will never come close to the pain I felt back then. 

My dad bought me branded clothes like H&M and Burberry and tried to surprise me with transferring money into my account every day. This was his life. Money was his life. It was high time for him to realize that this technique of his was out of ark, which would not make his daughter acknowledge him as her father and love him like a daughter. It was too late for that also. 

"Bye, Pappy. I'm gonna miss you," I said as I hugged his short fluffy body tightly. 

"Me too, angel," he said as I pulled back. "Come and visit me. Or at least call me. I know you don't give a fuck about your family but dear, I'm still here breathing and will be waiting for your call," he said, lightly pinching my cheeks. 

My dad and mom looked at each other from the corners of their eyes to what Pappy said. 

"I know, Pappy. I love you and you know that," I said, taking his wrinkled hands in mine and kissing it. 

"Have fun and be happy. You deserve everything in this world my dear," he said, making me bend to his height and kissing my forehead. 

We then fist punched, something we did along with goodbyes. I turned to my mom and dad who was looking at me. 

"Bye," I said and went towards my car and put the bag in the backseat. 

I got in the driver seat and looked at them and waved before driving off to my home. 

»»---------------------►

Since I departed from there in the evening, it was night when I reached home. I saw Andrew's car parked in the driveway while I entered my car to park in the garage. I got out of the car, took my bag and walked towards the door to see two pairs of sneakers. 

Praying to God that one shouldn't belong to the person I think, I rang the bell. 

Zinnia opened the door. She screamed my name and hugged me followed by Lily, who didn't waste a second to engulf me in her hug as soon as Zinnia retreated. 

I saw Andrew sitting on the couch, laughing at the girls and giving me a wide smile when he saw me to which I returned. 

Zinnia and Lily were asking how Pappy and my parents were when I heard a voice which proved that God took no notice of my prayers. 

I turned my head towards the side hearing Danish saying, "Welcome back, Elka."

How did you know?
It's what I've always wanted
Could never have too many of these
Will you quit kicking me under the table?
I'm trying, will somebody make her shut up about it?
Can we settle down, please?