RIVER

6 years later...

After what happened, Caspian and Emmy had found River, she was on the brink of death but she somehow survived that night. After what happened River had lost herself. It was uncommon to see River's real personality shine through...

She was guarded, she'd put a wall up that no one could break. She didn't open up about anything, she would be gone all day and all night then would come home with hickies and bruises littering her body, slurring her words and bumping into furniture.

As a way of earning money, River became a hit man, sort of, people who were too weak or scared to kill they're enemy themselves, would contact River, (who was known as deadlock), and tell her who they wanted killed. She quickly became known, everyone went to her if they wanted a job done.

She did it quickly and quietly, she wouldn't leave a trace. Both Emmy and Caspian had begged her to stop. River was desensitised to it, she wasn't fazed by there screams, there beg for mercy, they nails digging into her arm to try and get her to stop, the feeling of there blood splattering on her skin...

Every night when she went to sleep Powder's face was there, the words i love you echoed in her head, she slept so she could see her face but she also stayed up so she wouldn't have to.

When Rio died River didn't know how to cope, but what helped River pull through was Powder, but she didn't have her anymore, and what she was grieving, was Powder.

For a couple years after the incident and before her new job, she'd left town as soon as she could. She couldn't stand being there, everything reminded her of what happened, everything reminded her of her family. Of Powder... She couldn't handle it.

When River returned two years later, she searched for Powder. But for some reason no matter where she looked she was met with unfamiliar people. So... she stopped looking. She'd lost the hope that Powder or Vi was alive, the hope that they were ok she used to cling on to get through the day. River barely met anyone new.

She went to the same person at the brothel, she only met someone knew when they hired her. It was like anyone she ever cared about was gone. Sevika, Powder, Vi, everyone else.

Though Sevika knew that River was alive, she knew the pathway she'd went down. As far as River knew she was dead, as well as Vi and Powder. Sevika never let herself be known to River, she was so ashamed of herself that she couldn't even let herself be seen at the expense of Rivers face.

She watched from afar.

As for Powder, after Silco had found her he went through lengths that neither her or River knew that they were alive. Silco didn't want to lose control of Powder whilst she was young, but as she grew up he stopped hiding her away. But miraculously, there paths had never crossed.

While River felt more empty and alone than ever, Caspian and Emmy never left her side, through her guarded personality, through her pushing them away, through everything they were always there for her. But a lot of the time River forgot to show her appreciation to them.

River constantly shifted in her bed, her eyebrows scrunched up "I love you, Star" Powder's sweet voice echoed "your my best friend, forever" River shot up in her bed, she panted and put her head in her hands. She groaned and stood up, her head going dizzy and making her stumble for a moment.

"ugh, you look disgusting" Caspian said honestly, he studied her for a moment. Her skin was pale and lifeless, her hair greasy and knotty, she had dark circles under her eyes that held no spark, her lips dry and chewed up.

"Mhm thanks" River rolled her eyes, just as she said that Emmy walked through the door with a bright smile that almost made River smile, when she saw River and Caspian she smiled brighter, she brought Caspian in a hug, her cheek resting on his head.

She walked to River and put her hand on River's arm then dropped it, knowing that the last few years River had grown to hate physical touch. "Hey Rivera" Emmy's eyes traced over River's state "i'm gonna make us some food how bout you go shower" Emmy said in a gentle voice with kind eyes.

River mustered up a small smile "ok" she left to go shower. Emmy's smile faded and she looked at Caspian, her face written with worry, Caspian noticed her expression and sighed "I don't know what we can even do anymore, I don't know if she can be helped" Caspian shook his head, looking at his fingers.

At his words Emmy wanted to cry for River "she'll come back to us, i know it" she said hopefully, Caspian smiled at her optimism "yeah" he muttered. "Do you want some help" Caspian referred to the food, Emmy scrunched her face up "absolutely not" Emmy shook her head, Caspian looked offended.

"what you tryna say huh?" Caspian raised a brow "i'm saying that you're a horrible cook" Emmy giggled "woww" Caspian dragged out in a joking manner, River left the bathroom, she was wearing sweatpants that rested on her hips with a tank top on.

Emmy her looked up and down then whistled "wow, having showers really works for you" Emmy smiled mischievously, River chuckled "are you flirting with me?" River smirked and circled her "you can stop now." Caspian's face scrunched in disgust.

River shrugged and put her hands up in faux surrender. River sat down on the torn up couch, her legs parting and a handing running through her freshly washed hair.

Caspian rolled his eyes and flopped onto the couch, his head landing on River's lap, River instantly pushed his head off her causing him to roll off the couch. River's cheeks puffed out at her trying not to laugh at him.

Emmy smiled at River, she walked over to the two dinted metal plates in hand with sandwiches on them, before River even thought about taking the sandwich she looked at Emmy "where's yours?" River questioned "oh there wasn't enough for three, but it's ok i've eaten already" Emmy lied with a smile.

River crossed her arms "you have it." River basically demanded "no-" Emmy started but River cut her off "you have it, i'm gonna go out i'll just find something to eat then mmk?" River walked away to go change. Emmy grunted in annoyance and was not going to eat the food out of stubbornness until she heard her stomach grumble.

Emmy sat down next to Caspian who was stuffing the food in his face like it was going to disappear. Emmy looked at him with a disgusted expression on her face, Caspian looked at her with food stuffed in his cheeks "am i a shitty person for not asking if you had one?" his voice was muffled with the food in his mouth, Emmy started to laugh and punched his shoulder "shut up and eat." she rolled her eyes.

River got changed into her usual clothes, brushed through her hair and left the room "see ya later" River waved without looking and left the small apartment they shared.

(imagine River wearing the left outfit except the black shirt under the jacket isn't cropped and the boots would look like normal ones, not like Jinx's x)

           As River walked through the lanes her fingers fiddled with the leather bracelet on her wrist, she never took it off. She looked around at her surroundings, people yelling and getting into fights. Mistreated animals locked in cages, slamming their heads in the cage to try and get out.

River walked past the brothel, one of the girls smiling at River and looking her up and down, River caught her eyes and smirked at her, she then continued to walk and ended up in a store that sold tattoo and piercing stuff.

River walked through the shop grabbing and hiding face jewellery, needles and tattoo stuff. She walked up to the cashier who hadn't looked up the entire time she was there, River paid for three items then left the store with a bag, she took out the rest she stole and added them to the bag once she was out of sight at the shop.

River found herself at a house she ended up at a lot of the time, River knocked on the door, once she saw who it was she looked River up  and down and bit her lip. "Hi Immy" River said in a low voice. Imogen chuckled and shook her head, she walked away, her hips swaying with each step. River threw her head back and followed after her.

River walked into her bedroom, Imogen was lying on the bed, her clothes were discarded leaving her in lacey lingerie. River walked over to her, closing and locking the door behind her.

Immy giggled and stood up, she looked up at River with her big brown doe eyes "let's release some of that tension huh?" she smirked and started to take her clothes off. River was left naked, River grabbed Imogen's waist and pushed her onto her bed, her finger hooking Imogen's underwear and sliding them off  "let's do just that" she smirked.

River was sat on the bed putting her clothes back on "what's in the bag?" Imogen asked, River looked up at her and smirked mischievously "oh god.." Imogen's eyes widened "is it your murder kit" Imogen asked seriously, River stared at her for a moment to see if she was joking or not "no?"

River was now sat on the floor, Imogen was holding a hot needle with an excited grin "you look really excited to stab my nose?" River pointed at "cause i am" Imogen wiggled her eyebrows at her. River rolled her eyes "hurry up and do it" River said "I wouldn't take that attitude with the person holding a needle to your face but... i kinda liked it soo..."

River fought back a laugh and shoved Imogen's shoulder "ok ready?" Imogen didn't even give River a moment to answer before she was pushing the needle through her septum, Imogen then slid a thin black metal wire, jewellery through the piercing.

River blinked away the tears that stung her eyes, she wiggled her nose and sniffled before grabbing the mirror and examining it "looks cool" River nodded "can you finish up this tattoo?" Imogen asked River and lifted up her shirt, showing River's unfinished work. River nodded her head "yup"

"So what's going on with you and Emma?" Imogen asked River as she focused on the tattoo "huh?" River asked, Imogen chuckled at her "don't act innocent, she your girlfriend?" Imogen asked, Rivers eyes widened and instantly shook her head "no. no... we hooked up like... twice but, i don't know we kinda just did it to see how it would be. But nah, she's just my friend" River explained as she focused.

"plus... I don't do girlfriends" River said "yeah, yeah i know. That was the first thing you said to me when we met" Imogen rolled her eyes, River shrugged her shoulder's "so..." "so?" "Emmet's cute" "no." "oh..."

"Rivera? did you eat?" Emmy asked in a motherly tone once she saw River come through the front door "yeah I ate, don't worry" River smirked and went to her room "i think she got so-" Caspian got cut off "nope." Emmy raised her hand and walked away.

River sat on her bed, she looked down at the bracelet on her wrist.

"look what i found us" River revealed two matching bracelets, Powders face let up in excitement, "for us?" Powder repeated in confirmation, River nodded her head with an adoring look on her face as she stared at Powder "which one you want?" River cocked her head. Powder took a closer look at them.

"This one" Powder pointed at the bracelet with the moon charm on it. Powder scooched closer to River and took the bracelet. River helped tie the bracelet on her wrist, Powder then helping River with hers. Powder looked at River with a contagious grin. River smiled as well, Powder brought River into a bear hug, River rested her cheek on the crown of Powders head "thank you" Powder said.

The memory replayed in Rivers head like it had happened last week. Rivers eyes were glossy with tears after getting stuck in the memory. You never know how good you've got it until you lose it... River was reminded of that everyday.

River sighed and got up, she picked up the bottle of liquor and took a swig from it, then another... then another. She kept on going until she was passed out on her bed half naked. Emmy peaked her head through the door, she sighed when she saw River asleep in an uncomfortable position with an empty bottle sitting next to her head.

Emmy put the bottle in the trash, she lifted River's head up so she could put a pillow underneath, then gently put a blanket on top of her. Emmy stared at River then placed a kiss on her forehead. Emmy stood back up and wiped away a stray tear.

"I love you, Rivera."

authors note
in the later chapters i'm going to add flashbacks to when River "died" so you guys can see how River is still alive. What saved her, but i'm always interested in what you think happened and I LOVE reading comments and really appreciate them 💘