Sabrina Woods

Time seemed to move faster in the next few days.

My skin didn't seem to want to take a break from being irritated, continuing to raise and rub red all over in hives. I'd occasionally think back to what Nix had said, his words stuck across my brain like a magnet.

Was I looking to get high?

I tried to shake the thoughts off, my head spinning just thinking about taking a hit of dust at this time.

Diana had been crying on and off for the last few days, every once in a while trying to work up the nerve to go see her son.

JJ had come by while I was at Spencer's apartment, bringing her sons to see Diana. They played with Hallie on the days I brought her, and I think it made Diana feel a bit better.

I'd been over to clean the apartment, wash the dishes, cook anything I could whenever I could for Diana. I'd begun to feel like I was on autopilot as I worked around Spencer's apartment, finding solace in picking up the scattered books or his cardigans that Diana began pulling out of the closet when she was looking for her own things.

While being in his apartment, my mind was all consumed by Spencer.

I thought of the first time he'd come to my rescue, the second and third- he'd always been there for me since, literally, the day I'd met him. And here I was, cowering away in his apartment, too afraid to see the man I'd grown to adore behind bars.

The night Spencer called, however, I began to feel a bit different.

"I'm sorry I'm so late getting home," Spencer said through the phone to his mother. "It's just- Everything got complicated."

"Spencer, I am so sorry. You never should have been out there. This is... this is all my fault." Diana cried.

"No, it's- It's not your fault, mom. None of this is your fault. Okay?"

Diana shook her head, her hand covering her mouth as she cried silently, listening to her son.

"JJ said she brought the boys to see you."

"She did. They're getting so big, they're going to be taller than me pretty soon!" she laughed half-heartedly.

Spencer laughed. "I know. Well, she's gonna come by and see you every day."

Diana smiled sadly. "Will you be home soon, Spencer?"

"Not-Maybe, I hope so..." I could hear the contemplation in his voice as he spoke, trying not to get his mothers hopes up. "Look, mom... all you need to know is that I'm safe and I have a great lawyer."

"You do?"

"Yeah, she's great. She's really great."

"Spencer, I really don't like this. You shouldn't be there."

"I know, I know. It's.... It's not going to be forever. I promise. I promise you'll be okay. So will I."

Diana was now audibly crying, her shoulders shaking as she tried to compose her next words.

"Don't cry, mom, I'm okay. I'm okay, everything is gonna be okay."

"I love you, Spencer."

"I love you- I love you so much." Spencer choked out on the other end.

"Spencer, Sabrina is here, she's been helping me so much," Diana said. It felt like my stomach had lurched into my throat, my entire body stiffening with anticipation as she spoke. "She hasn't left. She's way better than that other one.. what's her name.."

"Cassie." I whispered.

"Cassie. Ugh. She's terrible."

"Sabrina is there, mom?" Spencer asked.

"Yes, honey she's right here-" she looked towards me and gestured towards the phone. "-She can hear you."

I swallowed the lump in my throat as I got closer to the phone, my fingernails digging into the palm of my hands.

"Hey, Spencer." My voice came out hoarse and shaky like I'd been screaming for hours.

"Sabrina," he breathed my name so softly, so quietly, it ran chills down my spine. "Thank you... thank you so much for being there. I know you have so many other things going on, and I know this is probably a lot to handle, but thank you-"

"Spencer," I cut him off. "Please, there is absolutely no need to thank me. I promise I'll look after your mother, she's safe. Don't worry."

There was a short pause before he replied, and I felt my hands begin to shake even harder as he spoke.

"If I get out of here..."

"When." I interrupted quickly.

"When I get out of here, I promise... I'll finish what we started that night."  he said quietly.

My heart was thumping wildly against my chest, my eyes welling up with unshed tears. I thought back to the night I had been crying in his arms, the comfort he'd provided me when I needed it so desperately- the way he held me, touched my face.. it was a distant memory now, thinking about the night we'd almost kissed. I felt longing I'd never felt before for him, wanting to feel his touch just one more time.

"Spencer, I don't know what to do. You've come to my rescue so many times I just feel like... I-I'm helpless, I can't do anything... Is there anything I can do? I just feel so...." I stopped to catch my breath, the tears finally falling from my eyes as I tried to choke back the sob that threatened to slip. "What can I do?"

"You're already doing everything I could have asked you to do, and more."

"Can I come see you?" I nearly whispered.

The silence that was filled between us was enough of an answer for me: No.

"Okay." I replied with a sniffle, even though he didn't say a word.

A man's voice rang out from Spencer's line and he cleared his throat.

"I... I have to go.."

"It's okay. I'll talk to you soon, Spence."

"Sabrina, I...."

I waited anxiously to hear the next few words he wanted to say, but it was apparent I wasn't going to get to hear it tonight.

"Okay. I'll talk to you soon." he said, disconnecting the line.

The tears were flowing down my cheeks as I hung up the phone. I wiped under my eyes furiously, trying not to stir up a reaction out of Diana or Hallie.

The rest of the night was filled with reassuring words that Spencer would be out soon, that his name would be cleared in no time with the FBI on his side.

Once Hallie and I arrived home, Nix was sitting on the porch with his foot propped up on the patio table. Hallie ran to him, allowing me to grab my keys and quickly open the door.

I couldn't stand to look at Nix at that moment- he was a walking reminder of my guilt. I hadn't even realized I felt guilty at all, until Spencer mentioned that night.  Spencer had walked into my life at a time when I needed someone to count on, to be dependable- he was there, and that was right. It felt right. But the night Nix had kissed me and I kissed him back... it made me feel...

Like a traitor.

Spencer and I were not together, and we still aren't. It wasn't like I cheated on him with Nix.... so why did it feel like I did?

"Hey. I brought you something." Nix said, picking Hallie up as I opened the front door.

He walked Hallie over to the kitchen, grabbing a snack down for her and ushering her to the table. He walked back over to me as I tiredly laid my keys and purse on the counter. His hand dug into the front pocket of his jeans, looking back at Hallie once more to see she was not paying us any attention, and pulled out a small bag filled with white dust.

My eyes widened in surprise, then narrowed in anger as I grabbed his wrist, lowering his hand back down to his lap.

"Are you crazy?" I whisper-yelled. "Why would you bring that here for me?"

"Because you need it." he said casually, his eyes searching mine for only god knows what.

"I don't need it. I haven't done blow in... in..." I tried to think of what I'd said to him last time, trying not to overlap any lies I may have told. "...In forever. There's no way I need it now."

"I just wanted to give you the option. I figured if you needed, I could watch Hallie and you could relax."

I felt my face become hot as I stared at him in utter disbelief. "You think I would snort coke while my daughter is just in the other room? With you to watch her, of all people?" He shrugged and opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, I cut him off. "Get out."

"What?"

"I said, get out." My eyes were wild as I watched him, my fingers digging into my palm as I curled them into a fist. "I can't do this right now. I want you to leave."

Nix nodded, running a hand through his hair. "Yeah, alright. I'll go. "

He walked over to Hallie, giving her a quick kiss goodbye and storming past me, out the door.

It felt like everything around me was spinning for the rest of the night. I tried to bathe Hallie, but she mostly did it herself, as well as putting on her pj's and climbing into bed. I kissed her goodnight and grabbed my stuff out of the living room. I threw my purse onto the bed, making the contents spill out of the front. I rolled my eyes and started stripping off all of my clothes, intending to step in the shower. I turned the bathroom light on, illuminating the once dark space, screaming when I saw someone standing in the middle of the bathroom.

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AUTHORS                                    NOTE.

A/N: two updates in one day? who am I?

probably someone with overdue homework that was supposed to be turned in 2 days ago and distracting herself with something else...... :)

also, I added a gif to chapter 15 to show you what Sabrina and Nix's kiss looked like 🤭

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