RE-BEGINNINGS

Three days—72 hours in total—was supposedly enough time for an exhausted person to recover. There were countless ways one could recharge during the span, yet Aera's time was spent in an oddly repetitive cycle: eating, thinking, sleeping, thinking, doing house chores, thinking, watching TV, and, of course, thinking. In truth, she devoted much of those hours to aimlessly spacing out between tasks. No matter how hard she tried, her thoughts inevitably circled back to the one person she swore she'd never think about again. Yet there he was, intruding on her mind all the god forsaken time.

“To be honest, I think you need therapy. With all the questions you have about this Jungkook guy, a therapist might be the professional you need to help untangle his shady behavior. Believe me,” Jiyoung advised Aera one Sunday evening when she failed to endure her endless pondering on her own. She had been on the verge of tearing her hair out when the idea of discussing her crisis with someone finally lit up in her mind.

Aera rolled her eyes. “They might just declare me insane, Jiyoung.”

“Well, isn't that the truth?” Jiyoung replied with a shrug, her tone effortlessly nonchalant. “You're practically driving yourself mad overthinking this. Maybe he just read your address off the ID card you’re always wearing around your neck.”

Aera narrowed her eyes, contemplating the possibility.

It might be true—Mr. Jeon could have caught a glimpse of her ID when they were hunched under the desk during the earthquake. But what she couldn’t shake off was the concerned, protective look in his eyes. It had planted the seed of doubt that Jungkook might know her far better than he let on; once again, raising suspicion that he might be Aera’s long-lost best friend, as his behavior mirrored exactly what her Jungkook would have done.

With all these thoughts racing through her mind all over again, she found herself zoning out mid-conversation. Luckily, she managed to pull herself back before going too far, preventing Jiyoung from calling her out.

“And what about his identity? What if he's faking it?” Aera blurted out. This was yet another thought that had been nagging at the back of her mind since the weekend began. Call her delusional, dramatic, or whatever, but if Jungkook had the eyesight of an eagle capable of reading the tiniest font off a badge, he could just as easily fake an entire identity and step right out of a dark thriller novel.

Jiyoung let out a skeptical sigh and said, “I don’t think so. It’s hard to believe, especially since we know he’s an orphan raised somewhere else. Didn’t you tell me that?” Her words brought a thoughtful pout to Aera’s lips. Yes, she had told her that, but she wasn’t ready to let go of the probability so easily, even if all the odds pointed toward it. Perhaps she didn’t want to accept that it wasn’t her Jungkook, but merely his lookalike.

Aera blinked blankly at the lit-up screen, her hand hovering over the keyboard before dropping limply to her lap. Her face was pale, her eyes dull, as though the glow of the display had drained the life from her.

Jiyoung tightened her grip on her mug, the warmth seeping into her palms as she struggled to reconcile the person before her with the Aera she knew—the one who’d laugh and giggle at Daisies’, filling the florist shop with her bright, infectious energy. But the Aera on the screen was a shadow of that person, her spark dimmed and unfamiliar. It felt almost unsettling to see her like that. Jiyoung had never imagined Aera, of all people, unraveling like this—fixated, restless, caught in the throes of an obsession over a guy who bore an uncanny resemblance to her old best friend. She could tell Aera wasn’t in love with Mr. Jeon; it was something shallower yet more consuming, an infatuation born of memory and longing.

Aera may have fallen for the boy who had played her knight in shining armor, but this wasn’t a fairy tale. She couldn’t afford to lose herself in a dream. It was time to break free from the comforting allure of familiarity and search for something real, something that wouldn’t vanish like a fleeting fantasy.

The silence stretched a beat longer between them: heavy and uncomfortable. Jiyoung had managed to articulate what Aera couldn’t—or perhaps didn’t want to—admit to herself. She had meticulously planned and dismissed every logical argument Jiyoung might offer, yet her heart still betrayed her. It ached with an insistent desire to crawl under the desk, cling to Jungkook, and confess just how much she missed him. Even though she had done the exact opposite that night, she told herself that under different circumstances, she would have driven home with him, their hands perfectly intertwined.

If only Jungkook could be true to himself. And to her.

Jiyoung tapped her fingers against the mug, the atmosphere growing gloomier with each passing second. Finally, she broke it. “How about you start dating for real? Maybe then you’ll stop drowning in all these useless thoughts.”

The hard stare Aera gave then seemed sharp enough to pierce through the screen.

“What? Don’t give me that look!” Jiyoung exclaimed, throwing her hands up in frustration. Moments later, she huffed and leaned back on the sofa, her posture now relaxed, her tone calm and self-assured. “Look, we both know it’s time for you to focus on something real. Get yourself a boyfriend, and maybe you’ll stop distracting yourself with everything else. You can’t keep entertaining yourself with the vibrator I gave you for your 22nd birthday, after all.”

“Jiyoung!”

As usual, their banter ended with the topic of dating, just like most of their endless conversations.

With a groan, Aera set her laptop aside and flopped onto her bed.

She stared up at the ceiling, its bright surface the unfortunate target of her relentless glares and blank stares for what felt like a daily chore. Aera couldn't help but reflect on her life with a composed mind whenever she gazed up at the endless white abyss. It gave her a moment of solitude to sort through her thoughts, even though they often led to dead ends. Either way, she found comfort in that fleeting second where she imagined Jungkook, her Jungkook, waiting at the end of their school hallway, waving energetically at her. His hand propelled Aera in his direction, his face illuminated by the biggest smile.

A wistful smile graced Aera’s lips as she closed her eyes, sleep tugging at her consciousness as Jungkook drifted through her thoughts.

That night, Aera dreamed of distant, plump lips that had stolen her first kiss in high school.

The next morning, Aera woke to a suffocating weight pressing down on her chest. Her head throbbed, each nerve pulsating with unrelenting remembrances. Her mind felt foggy, clouded by questions of why she had dreamed of the moment that had nearly traumatized her.

She ran her fingers across her lips as she turned to her right, still lying in bed. The brush of his lips against hers lingered with an inexplicable realness, as though it had happened just yesterday rather than years ago.

Why the hell was she dreaming of that night all of a sudden? Aera furrowed her brows in disbelief.

She was certain he had stopped appearing in her dreams after high school. So what was the point of him showing up now? Did she really need to see a therapist? She couldn’t believe she was even considering it.

Frustration bubbled up as she kicked her legs against the sheets, yanking at her hair.

“Ahhh!” she screamed into the pillow. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

Aera grumbled in defiance of the unseen force called fate but reluctantly decided to rise from bed and start her day.

In the bathroom, she took out her morning irritation on the toothbrush, scrubbing it vigorously from side to side. Leaning over, she spat into the sink before straightening up to face her reflection in the mirror. Dark shadows rested under her eyes, and her hair was a perfect imitation of a bird's nest. She stared at herself for a moment longer, then opened the cabinet above the mirror and retrieved her neglected skincare products. Twisting open a small jar of eye patches, she carefully applied them to soothe her tired skin. Next, she smoothed down her flyaways with the palms of her hands, resolving to treat herself to a nice haircut sometime later that week.

For her outfit, Aera chose wide-leg pants paired with a matching camisole that complemented her light, monochromatic sandy coat. Styled with minimal accessories, she exuded an edgy charm, something Taehyung quickly noticed when she arrived at work at half past nine.

“Woah, did my fashion sense finally rub off on you, Buttercup? You look hot,” Taehyung said, whistling as he spoke.

“And here I thought you only flirted with my girlfriend,” Mark teased from four desks away.

“I can flirt with men, too! Wanna give it a shot?” Taehyung smirked, quirking an eyebrow as if daring Mark to respond.

Mark raised his hands in mock defense, dragging out the "p" in “nope” before pushing his chair back with a loud squeak. As he settled into his seat, Taehyung jabbed him with one last teasing remark. “Give Jihee my love and tell her I miss her~.”

Mark flashed him a middle finger, drawing a chuckle from Taehyung. Their group had grown again after Mark returned from his one-month paid leave. Jihee's quirky presence was still missed, but the occasional mentions of her—along with mid-break video calls—were enough to fill the gap she left.

Turning back to Aera, Taehyung raised his other eyebrow with a knowing look that matched his playful tone. “So, any special occasion today, Buttercup?”

Aera pursed her lips, her forehead creasing as if deep in thought. “Not that I can think of,” she said after a brief pause.

“Meeting up with a date, then?”

“I wish.” Aera shrugged, her expression bland and unbothered.

Taehyung hummed thoughtfully, tilting his head toward the ceiling as he tried to piece together why, of all days, his soft, flower-dusted colleague had chosen to dress like a badass, sassy lead from a K-drama. Aera snapped her fingers twice in front of him, pulling his focus back to her.

“Why? Can’t I doll up to please myself?”

“You can, no offense,” Taehyung said with a shrug of his own. “My sister sometimes does it to channel her emotions, too, so I was wondering if it was a thing among girls?”

“It is.” Aera nodded, and Taehyung hummed in acknowledgment.

“Oh, what’s it for you today?”

“Bold and Unapologetic,” Aera said.

“Whoa, I like the sound of that.” Taehyung offered Aera his elbow, and she hooked her arm through it. Together, they made their way to the pantry, a spot they had stopped by every morning for the past month to grab their usual hot chocolate and espresso.

The soft trickle of water filling the Styrofoam cup echoed through the small room as Taehyung and Aera passed the time with light conversation about work and the weather.

“Hey, by the way, did you hear the news?” Taehyung asked, glancing at Aera.

“What news?” she replied, curiosity laced in her voice.

Taehyung smirked, already anticipating her reaction to what he was about to say.

Aera had just lifted the styrofoam cup to her lips, the first few gulps of coffee warming her throat, when Taehyung decided to drop the bomb. “The results for our Jeju Project came in,” he said, leaning back slightly. “The officials couldn’t decide on just one winner, so they decided to merge the two best proposals.” He paused for effect, his smirk widening. “Wanna guess who else got picked?”

Aera, unaware of the storm about to hit, nodded innocently.

“The Parks,” Taehyung deadpanned.

Aera choked mid-sip, a fit of coughs echoing through the tiny room.

Eyes wide, she nearly shouted, “W-what?!”

The heaviness she’d felt in her chest that morning surged back, stronger—crushing her insides. How was this even possible? Out of all companies, how could it be that Kim Enterprises were paired with their rivals for the job, specifically with the one person Aera shared a past with. This had to be some cruel joke fate was playing on her. Yes, it had to be.

With a protective hand on her rib, Aera looked at Taehyung with a disdainful, hopeful gaze. “Tell me you’re joking, Tae.”

“I wish I was, Buttercup,” Taehyung replied, sucking his teeth. “But I’m not.”

Aera’s heart sank, and she was suddenly pulled back into the dream she’d had earlier. The ghastly premonition returned, and it seemed her intuition had been right. Maybe this was the moment in her life when she was rekindling the ghosts of her past. There was only one problem, though. Aera didn’t know if she was ready to face them.

“I can't believe it either. It’s obvious Park Corporations is just using us to rebuild its brand reputation.” Taehyung clicked his tongue in annoyance. He had more to say, more dirt to spill about the company, but his complaints faded into background noise as Aera’s thoughts latched onto one thing: the slim but not impossible chance of meeting Park Jimin face-to-face.

Maybe she could join the project and work without catching his attention. Who would remember a girl from high school after nearly a decade anyway? Her image would have blurred around the edges of his memory, even if—by some miracle—he recalled the first syllable of her name.

Besides, it wasn’t like he was famous for anything admirable. Park Jimin had been an absolute asshat during his school days, reveling in his own fame and snatching up the attention of anyone who showed even the slightest interest in whatever the heck he was doing. But now that he was CEO of his family’s company, there was little chance he’d focus on anything other than rebuilding its reputation, just as Taehyung had said.

That gave Aera a momentary breath of relief.

Aera tuned back into Taehyung’s monologue just as he mentioned attending a coworker’s wedding next week. Casually, he asked if she’d go with him as his platonic date. She agreed to it in a heartbeat, and before she knew it, they were caught up in a debate about weddings—simple or lavish? Both chose simple. Going all out just wasn’t their style.

The rest of the day proceeded as usual.

A meeting was called to discuss the news of Kim Enterprises collaborating with Park Corporations on the Jeju project. There was a mix of “oohs” and “ahhs.” Some were disappointed to be working with rivals, while others were excited to see how they'd cooperate with one another. It was shaping up to be a thrilling ride, one sure to be filled with gossip. However, there was a strict instruction to keep things professional, keeping in mind they would be working alongside employees from the other company.

Names were brought up, and schedules were assigned. Aera was relieved to avoid crossing paths with Jungkook. The thought of working with someone who constantly reminded her of a past relationship while simultaneously engaging with the one who had been in her past seemed completely absurd. It felt like the cheesy love triangle subplot of a Netflix series, and Aera would rather turn blind than be a part of such stupidity.

However, that was exactly the situation laid out for her. Though she didn’t realize it until much later, for now, she thrived in the obnoxious oblivion of life and its secrets as she locked eyes with Jungkook, sitting across from her at the table. His gaze quickly swept over her outfit, noticing how she was dressed differently today—and how she deliberately maintained eye contact with him, not shying away like usual. He couldn’t help but worry if she was okay, something he often felt whenever he saw her, but today just seemed... different.

Taehyung seemed to sense it too, nudging Aera in the elbow. “Do you think I can pull off that look?” he asked, nodding toward Jungkook as he stared at the man's long hair that framed his forehead and was tied into a ponytail at the back.

Jungkook broke eye contact with Aera, and she leaned into Taehyung’s ear, muttering, “I think you’d rock it.”

Taehyung giggled. “You think so?”

Aera grinned. “Yes.”

That evening, Aera found herself walking along a sidewalk lined with stores, bustling with customers and lights. She had avoided taking the bus home, preferring to roam the streets rather than spend time alone. Her head was peacefully empty, and she loved it that way.

No scurrying thoughts invaded her mind, and she allowed herself to savor these small moments of freedom.

She brushed past a few people her age, each carrying large plastic bags, likely filled with cheap convenience store meals and beer. A group of teenagers sprinted by in a rush to race against one another, laughing and joking as they went. Aera watched their retreating figures with a distant smile.

There was a time when she, too, had been carefree and free-spirited. It would be a lie to say she didn’t miss those days. Growing up and navigating adulthood was as challenging as anyone could imagine. It was like Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans from Harry Potter—a mix of candies, some you liked and others you didn’t, with each phase bringing its own surprises.

Just like this moment, when Aera’s feet came to a halt just a few steps away from an old, dust-covered arcade machine.

She was surprised to see the large form of an adult hunched over in a seat meant for small children, tongue sticking out in concentration as the person worked hard to build perfect square buildings with dislodged Tetris pieces.

Aera was left perplexed, trying to determine whether this was an appropriate position for a renowned CEO of a company who was struggling to regain its footing.

“Jimin?” Aera called, her tone unsure. “What are you doing here?”

At the sound of his name, Jimin instinctively turned toward the caller, humming absentmindedly until he saw who was standing in front of him.

It took only three seconds for the realization to hit him, making him bite his tongue. He cursed under his breath as he scrambled to his feet, only to stumble on his shoes and almost make a fool of himself.

“Gorgeous? What are you doing here?” Jimin repeated, after finally finding his balance.

“I asked you first,” Aera pointed out.

“Yeah, I...”—Jimin trailed off, looking around as if searching for a justifiable answer. Honestly, he had simply been driving through the area when his gaze caught sight of the gaming machines. Feeling nostalgic, he told his driver to stop and came to play, sending the driver home afterward.

“Nothing,” he said after a moment. “What are you doing here?”

“I just got off work,” Aera replied.

“Oh, well, that’s good,” Jimin said awkwardly, his hands hanging by his sides. He pinched his thigh, trying to make sense of the situation. He had imagined running into Aera at least a hundred times: walking down a street, crossing paths in a hallway, locking eyes in a crowd, or spotting each other across the room. But somehow, playing a children's arcade game hadn’t been part of the plan.

God only knew what kind of impression this left on Aera. Because judging by her initial reaction, it wasn’t a good one—but he didn’t mind, as long as he got to see her sooner rather than later.

Jimin hoped for the best. So, he invited her to dinner.

“Are you hungry? We could grab something to eat.”

Aera wasn’t sure why she was agreeing to this, especially since she hadn’t exactly taken the idea of meeting Jimin well this morning. Maybe today’s Bold and Unapologetic theme was still working in her favor, considering she didn’t even flinch when Jimin took her to a food stall instead of a five-star restaurant and ordered her favorite street-style fried chicken and tteokbokki.

It was strange to see someone of his stature catering to and serving his own order, particularly when he had been born with a golden spoon in his mouth. But this was Jimin we were talking about, the same person who loved taking his grandfather for strolls in his wheelchair and rambling about how butterflies were the most delicate and gentlest creatures in the world.

Aera had no trouble recognizing the man sitting in front of her, with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, hair slightly disheveled, as the same eighteen-year-old she had started hanging around with in the late winter of her sixteenth year in Busan. The innocence in those almond eyes was still there, making it hard for Aera to believe this was the same person who had stolen her first kiss without permission.

Unwittingly, her gaze dropped to the plump lips currently munching on fried chicken.

The longer she stared at them, the harder it became to tell if she felt anything at all. She didn’t, Aera concluded at last. There were no romantic feelings for Jimin—at least not on her end.

She wasn’t looking for a relationship just to get Jungkook off her mind, despite Jiyoung’s advice. So why was she here, sharing a meal she hadn’t even intended to have with Jimin in the first place?

Aera voiced her inner conflict to Jimin, and he hummed in question, clearly dumbfounded. His eyes flickered to the untouched tteokbokki before lifting to her face, taking in the pained, puzzled expression etched across her soft features.

“Gorgeous.” That’s what Jimin liked to call Aera—because to him, she was beautiful even in sadness. Just like now.

“What are we doing, Jimin?” Aera asked again. “Why are we even here?”

The question momentarily threw Jimin off guard, forcing him to dwell on it himself. What was he doing here?

Surely, he wasn’t hoping for a happy reunion—not after what he had done to her. And surely, sitting across from her now didn’t mean he had another chance to make her his, just as he had greedily tried to last time, when he kissed her in front of a crowd, knowing full well how much her first kiss had meant to her.

Jimin knew he was being selfish the moment he found out where Aera was. He was fully aware that this could backfire on him spectacularly, but he clung to the fragile hope of a fresh start with her.

Then Aera’s voice cut through his thoughts.

“What do you expect to come out of this? What do you want from me?”

Jimin’s chopsticks slipped from his fingers, clattering against the table, a sound easily lost in the lively chatter of the food stall. He clasped his hands together, his expression tightening as he caught the weight Aera put on the word me.

“Look, Gorgeous—Aera,” he began, stopping himself just in time. Old habits. If he wanted this to work—and God, he wanted it to—he needed to keep his emotions in check.

“I’m sorry for what I did to you. I understand why you never came to my house before I left for the U.S., but—” He watched Aera carefully. “I couldn't live it down. I kept thinking about you. No matter how hard I tried, no matter how many flings I had, I couldn’t get you out of my head. Even now... I can’t live with the realization that—”

You rejected me when all I did was worship you. He swallowed the words. Was his love for her invisible to Aera?

Jimin didn’t know. But what he did know was that if he wanted Aera back in his life, if he wanted another hit at their relationship, he had to start over. And for that, he needed her forgiveness first.

“What I’m trying to say is... I want a fresh start with you. I want to leave the bad memories behind us. I want to rebuild what we had. It was sacred to me, and I know it meant something to you too.”

His eyes pleaded with her, his hands clasped before her like a prayer at an altar.

Aera wished she couldn’t feel the sincerity in Jimin’s words. But she did. She understood exactly what he was asking for now. He wanted to bury the past and build a future together, one free of regrets.

It sounded nice. She could almost taste it, the sweet savor of forgiveness and forgetting washing away the bitterness of the past.

Perhaps Aera couldn’t date just to distract herself from Jungkook, but she could at least aim for liberation by letting go of a rusted memory—one that did nothing but decay her past, making it impossible to revisit.

So, embracing the new theme of Courage and Acceptance for the evening, she let Jimin in, offering him a fragile smile: a silent invitation back into her life.