Lloyd woke up late and instantly sank into bed. It was one of those days. One of those days where his body hurt and felt yucky. He felt extremely lightheaded. Thank God François takes out the dogs in the morning.

"Apple..." His voice was timid and dry. "Apple, can you get me a water and medicine?"

Apple ran to the fridge and pulled the towel attached to the handle. First, she gave him the bottle of water, then ran to the bathroom. In her little basket next to the toilet was medication just in case something like this happens. He had enough strength to take the medicine, text his dad can't do his work, pet Apple, then go back to sleep.

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François was at work in his bakery. Today wasn't very busy. He was happy that Beau brought a few crossiants and stopped to chant for a bit.

"How's the hubby?" Only their families and closest friends knew they were together.

"Boyfriend, dumbass. He was bouncing off the walls last night. We were watching Disney movies."

He sighed and twisted his long hair. "Just a few more days until the wedding and nephews and-"

"Wooooo, too ahead." He checked his phone. "Hm, he would usually text me by now."

"He's probably still sleeping."

"Nope, he has to get up for work."

"His majesty." He grinned. "When you guys are kings, can you make me a knight?"

He smirked and put his phone down. "I'll make you the jester."

-------------------------

By three, there was still no text. François, after giving some muffins to a costumer, called him. He got really worried when it rang longer than it usually did.

"Lloydie?"

"Hiii Franny...." His voice was still dry and clumsy.

François put his hand on the counter. "You don't sound well, is everything ok?"

Lloyd yawned, "Yeah, just having a sick day. I already took my medicine."

He looked outside, it was going to rain soon. Everybody in France thinks they're made out of sugar, he won't have any customers.

"I'm coming home, ok? It's going to rain soon anyway." Lloyd tried to convince him to stay before he said, "I'll bring you some sweets."

"Yayy. Can you get a few éclairs?" Yep, he was sick. He never asks for anything specific.

François was already putting some in his bag. "Of course, babyboy. I'll see you at home, ok?"

"Ok, bye Franny."

He had to be there for Lloyd, last time he wasn't-

He walked home, it was close enough. He tried not to think about it, but his mind dragged him back to that day.

"François, please stay with me..?"

"You'll be ok, I need to toast you out there."

"But I don't want to be alone...."

"Lloydie, you'll be fine."

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When he arrived home, he took the dogs outside and put the treats away. It's been two months since they moved in together. The minute Lloyd was ready, they moved into a bright pink house in a well-to-do neighborhood. It was a small yet beautiful house. It had a huge backyard with a pool and garden for the dogs to fool around in, three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room, a kitchen, and a balcony in their room. It was honestly such a warm place.

He walked to their room and saw Lloyd in the bed, still sleeping. The lights were off and the TV was playing a sound for the dogs. He studied his boyfriend's features. Sweat in his white hair, red cheeks, definitely a fever. He put a cloth on his forehead and laid next to him, his arms around him. The rain began to pour as François turned on a Scream movie for him to watch. He loves horror movies, plus it's gets him more cuddles from Lloyd when they watch one together.

The night of the crash kept playing over and over. How could he, a military doctor, just leave him like that? Lloyd begged him not to go. He remembers how weak his grip was when he tried to stop him. The dark hair, the desperate dark eyes, how he trembled just lifting his head up to see François leave him.

He began to get teary-eyed as he remembered toasting the dying man in the other room. He wasn't even the one that found him in the bed, half-dead and hallucinating people standing over his bed like crows waiting for dinner. What if he stayed and laid with him like he is now? What if he wasn't being a dumbass and actually took Lloyd seriously when he said he felt like he was dying?

François checked his hair. No black hairs, not even gray ones. Good, good. Why didn't he listen the first time? Why didn't he just stay with him in that cold room? Why didn't he check what was left of his uniform to see one of his organs beginning to slip out?

He hugged him closer to his body. He could tell that Lloyd was wearing one of his hoodies and a pair of sweatpants from last night. He looks cute in it, even if he was sick. He kissed his head, which caused another flashback of him kissing the same spot before he left him. It felt so wet. He thought it was sweat. He didn't see how red it was.

He turned off the TV and laid there, facing Lloyd's back. He heard Benjamin licking himself, his boyfriend's breathing, and the rain. He put his hand on his chest, relishing the feeling of his heartbeat. Of course, that triggered a flashback.

"Lloyd, please." He remembered the pitful way he put his ear close to his heart. "Please make your heart beat." Unlike this time, there was no beat to comfort him.

--------------------

Around eight-thirty, Lloyd finally felt better. He was able to walk around to take care of the dogs, piss, shower, and get some work done.

He was happy to see François there with him, he looked so peaceful as he slept. They both take super long naps, he won't be up until twelve maybe. Lloyd took out some pink nail polish and painted his nails. He had purple and yellow for a while. As he painted, he wondered what his darling François could be dreaming about.

----------------------------

"DOCTOR! DOCTOR! PLEASE DO SOMETHING! BRING HIM BACK!"

"WE ALREADY TRIED, HE'S GONE!"

The room spun and François broke down as he saw his new boyfriend wrapped in cloth and have a tag tied to his big toe. He was left alone with the body. The body suddenly flew up to him and began shaking him.

"Why didn't you just stay with me?!" It cried, its black hair going in all directions.

"Please forgive me!" François couldn't see its face, it was just a blur. An angry and bloody blur.

"That's all I wanted! I didn't want to be alone and you left me!"

Everything spun around in red and black as the body yelled, "Franny! Franny! Franny!" and a distorted piano cover of Bridge Over Troubled Water played. The room smelled of oranges and strawberries.

"Franny! Franny! Franny!"

Je t'aime tellement.

je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement je t'aime tellement

----------------

The room seemed to spin when François shot out of bed. He looked around in the dark. Oh my God he's back in the room. The room that took him away.

He frantically felt around the bed, only feeling squishmallows and blankets. The doctors! They took him to get cremated! They couldn't help him!

He grieved into his hands. December 7th. 11:56pm. He wasn't fast enough. He didn't stay with him. He didn't listen to him.

Lloyd, none the wiser of what was going on, happily hummed as he ate two éclairs and decided to bring some up to eat so he could watch Netflix and do some more work. He put all the dogs to sleep, gave Apple a few extra treats for being a good girl, and went upstairs. François jumped when Lloyd walked in.

"Hi, baby!"

When he was close enough, François trapped him in his embrace and cried. Lloyd became worried and hugged him close, stroking his hair.

"I had a nightmare!" François sniffed as he grabbed on to Lloyd's navy blue sweatshirt.

"It's ok, it was just a bad dream. Everything's fine, I feel better and you're awake." The shorter crawled on the bed so they can embrace even closer, both their chests touching.

François kissed his cheek and his forehead, more relaxed yet still clinging onto his boyfriend. "I'm sorry, I just got scared."

"About the seventh?"

"...yeah."

Lloyd allowed François to tell him about the dream. If he was being honest, he doesn't remember a thing that night. He doesn't remember asking for him, but the redhead still recalls it vividly. All Lloyd could remember is being so cold and dizzy when he was waking up, but François was always there.

"I'm really sorry, baby." Lloyd finally said after François had stop crying. "I really can't remember anything, but I remember you were there during my recovery. And I'm super happy you were there, I wasn't alone."

François sighed and touched his face. "Thank you, sweetheart. I just feel so bad for leaving you. And I'm sorry that I wasn't there."

"I don't hold it against you, I don't even remember shit." They both chuckled. "If I don't hold it against you, you shouldn't hold it against yourself either."

"It's hard not to."

"Then we'll work on it." He hugged him. "Talk about it with your therapist, and we can talk about it whenever you want."

"Are you sure? I don't want to upset you."

"I don't know what happened. Maybe it could help me process it better."

They talked more about it. They agreed it could help them. François could forgive himself, and Lloyd could begin to progress properly. He only knows the recovery and small fuzzy bits. Maybe knowing exactly what happened could help a bit.

After a while, François felt better and let Lloyd feed him sweets. There was no need to do work, in fact, he didn't even have to do anything today. He put on the TV and put on Disney.

"Ratatouille again?" François wasn't complaining, it was his favorite movie.

Lloyd laid his head on his shoulder. "It reminds me of you."

"Aww, you think I'm like the cook? I'm not as handsome but-"

Lloyd let his thoughts win. "You're smaller than the rat but he still reminds me of you."

He laughed as François side-eyed him, even though he knew that was smart.

"I can tell you're feeling better." He let himself laugh. "It was quiet before."

"Aww, you miss your peace and quiet?"

"Noo." He hugged as Benjamin went on the bed. "It was too quiet."

"Bennie, what are you doing, monsuir?" Benjamin came up and kissed Lloyd's face. "You're too big for this bed."

Ben was an American bully, huge and lazy. He flopped his head on Lloyd's thigh and did those stupid pitbull purrs. (Trust me my dawg does that shit all the time 💀) He was the dog that towered over his favorite person when he stood on two legs, could eat a whole turkey in one setting, and could kill someone if he needed to but decided to wear little sweaters and act gentle with his tiny sisters. He knew that his owners couldn't pick him up to go back in his crate, and he used that to his advantage when he needed to sleep in their bed like now.

"Now there's no space, Ben." Lloyd stroked his floppy eyes.

"Easy fix."

François moved Lloyd so that he was sitting on his lap. They both liked this, and the redhead didn't try to hide it.

"Franny, it's touching my leg."

"You know you like it." He whispered in his ear and had his arm around his chest. "Are you in the mood or?"

"Not really for sex, but kinda for touching."

"I'm down for that."

The dog snored. "But I kinda want Ben off the bed, it'll be weird."

François bribed the fat fuck away with treats as Lloyd turned downed the movie. He put the smaller back on his lap and, with asking for permission before each step, slowly put his still boney hand on his dick.

"Ok, sweetheart, you could do whatever you want. Just don't break it." They grinned as Lloyd looked down at the pointy thing in his hand.

He decided to put lotion on it first, which already made François groan. "I didn't even start yet!"

"Then you better start!" Then quickly added, "If you want, of course."

He thought, then pushed it up and down like a toy. François held on to the blanket, swearing and sweating. Lloyd put his hand between his thighs while cutely squishing his boyfriend's dick. He secretly loved having him in such a valuable position.

"Alrightie, Franny, put it in back your boxers." Lloyd said after a few more minutes of play.

"C-can you do it? If you want?"

"Hmmm..." He moved it up and down and all around. "If you cum for me, I'll put it back."

"Ok! Ok!" His voice cracked to a high, which turned on Lloyd.

He moved it between his fingers in a circular motion. He moved his balls with his pinky, giggling by the way they moved. He rubbed the tip of it gently. That did it.

"Alright, good boy." Did you expect the guy with mommy issues to not have a praise kink like cmon. "I'll put it gently."

François, still recovering from all that, allowed him to put it back and pull him into his arms after cleaning his hands. He had his head on his chest, his heartbeat now soothing him.

"Was that good enough for my goodest boy?" In the back of his head, he almost thought it was funny because he sometimes says the same thing to Benjamin when giving him pets.

"Yeah..." the redhead smiled when Lloyd played with his hair.

"I'm happy I have such a good boy. You're so sweet, always taking care of me." His voice soften. "I'm so lucky, you know that?"

François got hard again. "C-can you say more stuff in German? I really really like your voice when you speak German.."

"Natürlich, François." He kissed his face, he looked so beautiful without even trying to. "Du bist ein guter Junge, ich schätze dich wirklich sehr und ich liebe dich sehr." (I'm not transitioning this use Google translate if you want 💀)

François took out his dick to beat off. Lloyd gently put his hand on his. "Ich könnte es tun, wenn du willst."

"Ja, ja."

He did it for him as François moaned, hiding his face in embarrassment. Lloyd slightly moaned and kept speaking German. It didn't take long for him to finish, and once he did he felt sleepy and wanted to cuddle. The other washed his hands again real fast and turned off the lights before getting to bed. François looked so relaxed as he laid in bed, waiting for Lloyd join.

"Thanks, babyboy." They were back to speaking French.

Lloyd laid next to him and booped his big nose. "That was fun, but I'm kinda tired too."

"Same." He hugged him close. "Wearing my hoodie again?"

"Nooo."

"If you're lying, you won't get any kisses." François rubbed his back to try to get him to go to sleep, he always had a hard time going to bed naturally.

"Maybe I am. Maybe isn't no or yes." Lloyd wrapped his arms around his neck.

"Hmm...ok."

Slowly pulling each other in, they kissed. They don't kiss often, only when they both feel like it. The last time they did was when Lloyd returned from Vagu to move with François. That was a wonderful day.

Now, two months later, they were doing it again. They paused to breathe a few times before doing it again and again. They weren't shy with touch. Lloyd liked touching his body, going for his waist and hair. François loved touching his face, it was like touching a Greek statue. He liked stroking his cheeks and sometimes his white hair.

They stopped when both of them were falling asleep while kissing. Lloyd, for some reason fully awake now, couldn't stop staring at the now sleeping François. He studied his features, thinking he's more handsome the longer he stared. His beautiful hair was the color of rubies and his eyes were little bright sapphires peacefully closed. His favorite thing about him were his freckles. They were tiny star kisses that covered his whole body. He counted all of them once. 4,078. Four thousand-seventy-eight little kisses on his body.

Maybe one day, he can kiss him twice more than that. He kept staring. He had peach fuzz on his face, one or two pimples, and a very light scar on his forehead. That wasn't from the war, that was from his mother. How could she abuse such a heavenly thing? He kissed it. Maybe if he gives him all the love in the world, he'll get rid of the pain she caused. He looked down at his fingers. He stroked each one. A ring would look very nice on his hand.

He suddenly felt his eyes become heavy. He snuggled up in François' embrace and fell asleep, holding his hand.

Toby Edwards -????