In the craziness of the wedding being infiltrated, Harry ran towards not his, but her best friend.

"Poppy!" He yelled, turning the girl's head. "Poppy, listen to me, tell- tell her I love her!"

And he never got to see Poppy's nod, because Hermione was grabbing his arm and apparating them away.

But she nodded anyway.

❦︎❦︎❦︎

On the thirty first of July, Voldemort had taken over the ministry.

Rufus Scrimegeour was dead. He had been replaced with Pius Thicknesse, who was, by extension, Voldemort.

The world had instantly gotten darker. Muggles were going missing and being killed by the day, and so were wizards and witches associated with the Order. Cassia read the newspaper every day, just in case there was any news about Harry. She couldn't have him dying on her.

She knew that he'd be off on his mission by now, with Ron and Hermione. She had no idea what they were doing, but she wished them all the best.

However, she did know where her destiny lay.

The plans for Hogwarts had been announced yesterday. Every eligible student was to attend, meaning Voldemort had the whole population under his eye. He was also going to be checking blood status, meaning muggle borns who dared show their face there would be, at best, imprisoned.

Snape was to be headmaster. Cassia had wanted to scream when she found out, and cry, but she'd done neither. She'd congratulated him along with her brother, both of them smiling very falsely.

But the worst part by far of this new, dark world was the Muggle Born Registration Commission.

All across the country, muggle borns were being round up and taken to the ministry, where they were questioned, family trees inspected and then imprisoned or tortured or killed. Voldemort was putting it about that muggle borns were bad and had 'stolen magic', meaning they had no right to call themselves magical.

It was bullshit, all of it was. And the head of the commission was Dolores Umbitch, so we were hardly talking about fair.

But it hadn't been something Cassia could change.

Or something she was able to.

It had been a month since all of this started, and in that month, Cassia had been let out the house a total of one time, to go to a dark, dreary Diagon Alley and get her Hogwarts things.

Apart from that, she'd been the family slave. She'd cooked, cleaned, been slapped, punched, hit, bruised and more. She was getting used to it now, though, and had come to expect it.

But today was the day that she was equally dreading and excited for.

Today was September first.

And Cassia would get to escape her father and her family, and the death eaters, and she wouldn't get abused anymore, but also...

She had no doubt that Poppy would be going back, because she was a pure blood. Ginny, Neville and Luna, too. And all four of them would hate her, and never want to speak to her again. And she would no doubt get told that Harry had broken up with her, and no longer considered her his girlfriend.

So, when the time came to board the Hogwarts Express, Cassia avoided the Gryffindor carriage, despite the scarlet lion embroidered upon her chest, and opted instead for the Slytherin one. She knew her (former) friends would never go there, and if she wanted to stay away from them, she had to go there.

So there she sat, next to Draco, opposite Pansy and Blaise. Crabbe and Goyle were both in the seats on the opposite side, and other Slytherins sat facing them.

She didn't say much. Blaise and Pansy and Draco had many a conversation about how amazing this 'new' Hogwarts was going to be, and how good it was that mudbloods were getting put in their place.

Cassia was craving to be in the Gryffindor carriage with Poppy, her best friend. But Poppy probably didn't consider Cassia her best friend anymore, what with all the lies and deceit last year.

"...and then I said I didn't wanna share a dorm with a mudbl-"

"I'm going to the toilet," Cassia said, interrupting Pansy and Draco and Blaise's laughs, and swinging herself off the bench.

She was fighting back tears as she made her way there, and when she got inside, the light was dim. But Cassia didn't go into a cubicle. Instead, she stood in front of the mirror, her hands gripping the sink in front of her so hard her knuckles turned white.

She wasn't sure what happened when she got to Hogwarts.

Wasn't sure if she could handle it.

Wasn't sure if she would even survive.

But she was sure of one thing.

She'd never felt this low before.

❦︎❦︎❦︎

After the rest of a terrible train ride and a very awkward carriage ride, Cassia was at Hogwarts.

But it wasn't Hogwarts like she remembered it.

Everything was darker. The castle, the rooms, everything. Dementors were surrounding it, chilling everyone, and no one seemed to care at all.

Dumbledore dying (being killed) had changed everything.

However, that wasn't even the worst part.

It took a total of five minutes inside the castle for Cassia to run into Poppy. She was walking down the asile between the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff tables, and her (former) best friend was walking up it, talking in hushed tones with Neville and Ginny.

All three of them stopped, stock still, as they came face to face with Cassia.

They stood opposite each other, taking each other in, and it made Cassia feel horrible. To know that she could've been there, but she wasn't, and it was all her fault.

"I-I have to go," she stammered, pushing past them.

"Cassia-" the voice of her best friend was music to her ears, but not good music.

"I have to go," she repeated, squirming away from all of them and walking down the aisle, sitting alone at the bottom of the table.

She didn't look behind her, which meant she didn't see Poppy's longing look, or Neville's sad one. She thought she would see looks of anger and irritation, or worse, they would ignore her.

So she didn't look.

Where she did look, however, was the teachers' table. And she was not prepared for the way it made her feel.

There were still the familiar ones. McGonagall was still sat up there, just not next to the head, and so were Flitwick, Sprout, Slughorn, Trelawney and Madam Pomfrey.

It was the new additions that made Cassia's stomach crawl.

Snape was there, of course, like he was every year, but this time, he was sat in the headmaster's chair. Dumbledore's chair. Cassia wanted to scream at him, to tell him to get out, because he killed him and he didn't deserve this. Naturally, she was a coward, so she did no such thing.

And there were two more newbies. On either side of Snape sat Amycus and Alecto Carrow, two of the death eaters that had she and Draco had smuggled into the school last year. She hated them, with all her heart and soul, and the way Amycus looked at her and all young girls... it made her fucking sick.

She felt more tears start to flow as she stared up at them, but she reined them back.

She could not cry in front of Poppy.

❦︎❦︎❦︎

After a lengthy sorting (everyone that had never been to Hogwarts before had to be sorted) and a lonely meal (Cassia had distanced herself from everyone, eating on her own down at the end of the Gryffindor table, not seeing Poppy's insistent looks and refusing to acknowledge her existence), the bit Cassia had been dreading came.

The speech.

Snape wasted no time in strutting out from his seat, jerking his wand up to silence everyone. It fell immediately, and he continued.

"Welcome back to Hogwarts," he said simply, looking around at everyone. "You may have noticed some... changes that have been implenented to the school, so I will go through them now to avoid... ignorance, in why they have been installed."

Cassia looked up at him, her face stony.

"First, dementors have been stationed at all exits and entrances to the castle," Snape announced. "Any student attempting escape will be severely punished, and, as I am sure you are all aware, dementors have their own, unique form of punishment."

So if we try to escape we get the dementors kiss? What the f-?

"Second," Snape moved on swiftly. "There are two new changes in staff this year. The first is Amycus Carrow, who will be taking over my post as defence against the dark arts professor. I have no doubt that he will perform well in this role, and I hope all of you abide by his rules."

Cassia was not looking forward to Amycus' classes, nor-

"We also have Alecto Carrow, who will teach muggle studies in the wake of Professor Burbage's resignation," Snape told them. "I hope you will listen well to her, she has a lot of knowledge on this subject."

Cassia stared in shock and disbelief. Defence against the dark arts was about to become dark arts. Muggle studies was about to become wizard supremacy studies.

"Off to bed now," Snape said, his voice like nails on a chalkboard. When no one moved, and everyone continued staring, his voice turned into a snarl. "Now."

As everyone began to disperse, Cassia felt like punching him.

But she was a coward.

So she didn't.

❦︎❦︎❦︎

She didn't belong in the Gryffindor common room anymore.

That was the thought that skimmed through Cassia's head as she walked tiredly through the small space she once felt so at home in. Her aim was to go up to the dorm, change into pyjamas, and get to sleep long before Poppy came in.

She didn't know what she would do for the rest of the term, but what she did know was that she didn't want another lecture on how horrible she was. She'd already had one in her head ten thousand times.

So, before anyone could ask her anything, she ascended the stairs, and headed into the dorm.

What she didn't expect was the brown haired girl that was sat in there, sorting through clothes.

Shit.

Poppy looked up at her the second she entered, and met her eyes, which widened.

"Er, I- I have to-" Cassia started, backing away.

"A colloportus!" Poppy said without hesitation at the door, pointing her wand at it to lock it, then- "Expelliarmus!"

Cassia's wand (which Narcissa had made Lucius give her back for Hogwarts) flew from her hand into the air, where Poppy caught it expertly, turning to face her best friend.

Cassia looked from her, to the (locked) door, and then back to her.

"Fuck you," was the first thing that came out her mouth. "Fuck you, Poppy!"

And as soon as she opened her mouth, the tears started to flow, and soon, she was sobbing. She couldn't help it. Looking at her best friend, and how much harm she'd done her... she just couldn't help it.

"Cassia..." Poppy's voice was warm, and gentle.

"F-fuck you..." Cassia stepped further away.

"Cassia, please-" Poppy moved closer.

"N-no, stop!" Cassia cried, moving away again. "I-I'm a traitor, and I betrayed all of you- and I dated Harry, even though he didn't d-deserve me- and I'm a coward, and I'm a terrible person, and I feel so bad because you all believed m-me-"

She didn't complain this time when Poppy wrapped her arms around her, hugging her close, just sobbed into her shoulder and tried to breathe. She'd wanted to tell someone about all this for more than a year, and her best friend was the best one.

But it was tearing her apart.

"Cassia..." Poppy whispered to her. "I-I know you hate yourself, but you need to know that none of us hate you."

Wh-what?

"What?" Cassia asked her thoughts, wiping her eyes and stepping back to see that Poppy was crying, as well.

"We got your letter," she said, smiling slightly. "H-Harry and I read it together. W-we were angry at you, for not telling us, because we thought you didn't trust us but-"

"But I couldn't," Cassia interrupted. "I-I couldn't, Poppy, because I was under-"

"The vow, I know," Poppy nodded. "Harry and I were absolute messes by the end of it, a-and we both agreed, we're not angry at you whatsoever."

Cassia shook her head. "You should be."

"No, we shouldn't," Poppy shook her head, wiping a tear that had fallen down her cheek. "Cass, have you any idea how brave we think you are?"

Hearing that toppled Cassia over the edge, and she dissolved into sobs again.

She wasn't brave. She was a coward. She'd cowered all last year, and now, she was cowering again.

She looked up at Poppy. "S-so Harry's n-not angry?"

"No," Poppy smiled slightly. "All summer, h-he did nothing but speak of you, he's still got the letter, he reads it everyday..."

Cassia shook her head, lips pressing into a smile. "I thought he would hate me," she whispered, mostly to herself. "I-I thought he'd never speak to me again..."

"When we rescued him from the Dursley's, the first person he asked about was you," Poppy told her. "He couldn't hate you if he tried, Cass, and he's not trying."

Cassia wanted to collapse, but she didn't. "S-so you were one of the seven Harry's, then?"

"Yeah," Poppy nodded. "Y... you heard about that, then?"

"Eavesdropped," Cassia nodded. "Did- did Ron's ear really get-?"

"George's," Poppy said, looking down. "And Mad-Eye-"

"Died," Cassia nodded. "Eavesdropped that one, too."

Poppy nodded, more tears appearing. "And it was Mundungus' fault, because he took one look at Voldemort and disappeared."

Cassia nodded, wiping one of her own tears.

"So, h-how was your... your time?" Poppy asked tentatively. "This summer, I mean."

Cassia was going to burst into tears if she dived straight in, so she didn't. But slowly, however, she explained everything.

She talked of her father, and how he was out of prison, and how terrible that meant her body felt. She talked of the death eater meetings her house had become home to, and how much she detested all of them.

She talked about the guilt she'd felt ever since leaving Hogwarts, and how terrible a person she thought she was. She talked of how she didn't want to be back here, with Snape as headmaster and the Carrows as his lackeys.

Once she was finished, Poppy embraced her, long and hard, trying to make up for missed time.

"There's one more thing," she murmured to Cassia, still holding her in her arms.

"What?" Cassia murmured back.

"Well, you know Harry, Ron and Hermione have gone on their mission..." Poppy said, and Cassia nodded. "Well, they left the night the death eaters took over the ministry, the-"

"Thirty first of July," Cassia nodded, ignoring Poppy's confused look.

"Yeah," she nodded. "That was the night they left, and... before they did, in the absolute craziness of everyone running, Harry... he asked me to tell you that he loved you."

Cassia wanted to cry.

She wanted to break down and fucking sob, because Harry was still alive and he still loved her, despite all she had done to convince him otherwise.

"That was the last time I saw him, and... the last thing he spoke about was you," Poppy's eyes shone. "He loves you so much, Cass. So, so much."

And for the first time in a year, Cassia felt deserving of such love.

Poppy hadn't convinced her she'd done nothing wrong, of course. That would come in time. But she had convinced her of that one, small thing.

And there and then, she promised to herself that the next time she saw Harry, she would tell him.

I love you too, Potter.