PLEASE BEWARE THAT WHATEVER YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ IS PURE FICTION AND VERY FLUFFY AND STUPID. 

Why are there so many C's in the title what is this? 

Anyways. My bae, Sparkler2020 requested this. Look at me doing requests.

"For Chris: can you do one based on the chug challenge except he throws up?"

Here you go, a hand-crafted chapter about vomiting. 

Jokes aside. (Puts joke to the side) 

TW: Vomit, milk, heaving, laughing, breaking of the fourth wall, housewife Matt, watering children, killing fish, arms, absolute nonsense

Also if this is the first time you are reading one of my one-shots, I promise nothing said here is done in real life. And it's not always like this. We do have sanity. 

--

Everyone has a morning routine. They repeat it every morning and nothing changes it. It's like an arm, always there unless removed. 

Some are normal, like taking the dog for a walk or brushing your teeth. The stuff four out of five people do. 

Some have questionable routines though. Killing the fish and reviving it before going to kiss their husband awake so he can water the children. 

See, Chris didn't fit into either of those categories. He was more in the 'A soft drink a day keeps the doctors away and what's better than having that soft drink fifteen minutes after you wake up' category. 

Chris opened the fridge, ready to get his morning Pepsi like he did every morning. But he couldn't even open the fridge before getting interrupted. 

"Pepsi is like coffee to you" Nick stated, seeing Chris about to open the fridge. He knew his brother wasn't going to get water. 

Chris rolled his eyes. "Shut the fuck up Nick, at least I'm not drinking cases of coconut water every day" 

Nick whipped his head around in absolute shock that his brother just said that. "Are you implying that I drink gallons of coconut water? That is a crazy accusation kid" He sounded like he was in a car video. 

Chris couldn't believe how much Nick changed the topic and twisted his words like his stomach on a rollercoaster. "I said nothing about that!" 

"Your tone sounded like you were accusing me" 

"That is absolute bullshit, Nick. I know you-" Chris was cut off by Nick, bringing out the important questions that determine how much one knows about each other. 

"What songs have I listened to today?" 

Chris thought long and hard. Or realistically about six seconds. "You haven't listened to music today" 

"Damm you're good" Nick muttered under his breath. 

Chris smirked and then went back to opening the fridge. "Nick" His voice was high pitched, sounding like he just went through puberty once again.

Nick found it amusing how much his brother sounded like a girl. "Yes, Chris. Would you like something, Ma'am?" 

"Why do we have so much milk in the fridge?" Chris paused for a second, "wait did you just call me ma'am?" 

Nick doubled over in laughter, his brother finally tuning into the conversation. 

Chris was tempted to pick up one of the around seven cartons of milk, housed in the fridge, and throw it at his older brother. "Stop laughing Nick" 

Nick stood up straight, deciding now would be the perfect time to practice his posture. "Stop laughing Nick" he mocked Chris. 

Chris blinked a couple of times and picked up one of the cartons of milk, ready to pfft the milk at Nick's head at a world record speed so he could have the pleasure of writing on Nick's gravestone, 'Killed by a carton of milk'. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" Nick repeated, knowing Chris was about to use his head as a pinata and milk as the bat. "We are doing the chug challenge for a Wednesday video. Matt brought some milk last night for it" Nick used his hands to protect his head, his life flashing in front of his eyes. 

Chris put the milk down on the table. "Oh" 

The morning routine was interrupted today, by milk. Lots of milk. Chris couldn't even find a Pepsi amid the milk. 

-- 

Matt brought up three buckets and placed them on the ground next to where they were sitting. He was going to take no risks today. The last thing he wanted to do was have to clean up milk on the floor. 

"What's with the buckets?" Chris asked, seeing Matt lay these buckets like he was doing a challenge on a game show. 

Matt shuddered as he thought about what could be in the buckets in around ten minutes. "One droplet of milk on the floor and you are doing your own laundry until Halloween" Matt spat out. 

"The housewife is mad. Everyone be scared" Nick joked, bringing his hands up to his face and posing like that kid in Home Alone. 

Matt rolled his eyes and went to turn on the camera while Chris laughed at Nick. 

"Good morning campers!" Nick exclaimed. 

"Nick, we aren't doing a podcast" Matt reminded his clearly confused brother. Maybe he needed to be checked for colourblindness since there was not a spec of pink in the kitchen. 

Nick zipped his lips real quick, vouching not to say anything for at least three seconds. 

"Anyways, we are doing the Chug Challenge since someone requested it and we were running low on milk" Matt took the intro for once, mark it in your history books everyone. Matt then went over to the fridge, grabbed three cartons of milk and balanced them like he was Cinderella delivering breakfast to her ugly stepsister. 

Apart from the fact the ugly stepsisters weren't ugly, looked like boys and didn't have their priorities in life set for balls and princes. 

Maybe Nick. 

Anyways. 

"Anyday now, Cinderella" Nick called out, seeing Matt struggle to walk the small distance. Matt flipped Nick off and as soon as the milk left his hands and onto the table. 

The triplets fixed up the cartons and took off that circle of plastic that prevented any milk from coming out. 

Chris sniffed the milk, making sure it wasn't expired. Nick did the same thing, not trusting the milk Matt brought. After the situation with the fish, they didn't trust Matt to buy things that cost money anymore, limiting him to buying soda, water balloons and laundry detergent. 

"Milk's good. Let's get chugging. The first to chug without vomiting it back up gets two hundred dollars from each brother plus bragging rights." Chris explained, making up the prize as he spoke. 

Nick smirked, "An extra four hundred in my bank account sounds good right about now". He then grabbed his Spacecamp out of his pocket and applied it" 

"He likes his lips moist before he drinks it" Chris stated, making a joke he clearly didn't think about before he spoke. 

"THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID" Matt screamed out, the loudest he had ever spoken, as soon as Chris let those words even leave his mouth. 

After a bit more rambling and many failed attempts on start the timer, the triplets took one last deep breath. 

"Three"

"Two"

"One"

"GO" 

They all started chugging the milk. (That's what she said. I need to get my mind out of the gutter)

-- 

Milk leaked from Nick's mouth as he tried desperately to get all the milk into his system. He was about to pull a Chris and diagnose himself with a lactose intolerance to get himself out of the challenge. 

Matt had to keep taking breaks between chugs, scared he would choke on the milk. The last thing he needed was a video of him on the internet choking on milk, there were already videos of him crying over ketchup. 

Chris was halfway done with his carton, trying to get it all down before he could even think about vomiting it back up. 

"I...hate.....this" Matt gasped as he chugged some more milk. 

Nick put down the milk as he grabbed the bucket, spitting all of it out. He felt so sick. "I'm out" He sunk into his chair, watching his brothers drink milk as their lives depended on it. He was about to be two hundred dollars poorer but he didn't care. 

Matt saw Nick out of the corner of his eye, stop drinking the milk, like the milk would poison him or something. 

"Matt you good?" Nick questioned, seeing his brother taking a deep breath. Matt shaked his head and grabbed his bucket. 

Chris was still chugging though. It helped if he envisioned it as the Pespi he never had when he woke up since the milk kicked it out of the fridge. 

"Chris calm down Jesus" Nick said, rubbing Matt's back as he spit out all the milk into the bucket. 

Chris didn't listen though, wanting that four hundred dollars. He kept drinking the milk, yet to take a breath. 

Matt looked up from the bucket, seeing Chris drink the milk like it was a shot. "Woah Chris" 

Chris could feel his insides slushing around. They didn't want any more milk. Chris took his lips off the carton, taking a breath. 

Bad decision. 

"Look Matt, I don't know about you, but Chris looks the same colour as the milk" Nick pointed out, blinking a couple of times. Maybe he was high. Does milk get you high?

Chris looked at the bucket on the floor and the camera set up in front of him. For the first time in his life, he used math for something unrelated to a car video topic that would affect absolute no one in the population.

"If the vomit subacts itself from my body in roughly fifteen seconds, that gives me enough time to run to Matt's bathroom. Three, two, one." He thought to himself mentally before doing a countdown..

Chris stood up from his chair and bolted to the bathroom, swinging open the door. It would have been a cool entrance if he was going into any other room for any other reason. 

He knelt over the bathroom and opened his mouth. The vomit took no time to expel itself, falling into the toilet bowl like a waterfall. 

He then flinched slightly when he felt hands touch his back.

"Shh, Chris, it's just me" The male voice cooed.

"Who's 'me?" Chris asked before being cut off by a harsh gag, milk and the tacos from last night joining the puke party.

Nick stepped back a bit, scared that the vomit was going to hit him. "It's Nick, just vomit please"

Chris nodded, not really taking in the fact his brother just told him to vomit, even though he was three steps ahead.

"I think I'm done now" Chris informed Nick, who was rubbing his back in a circular motion. Nick was washed over with relief, thanking the Lord that no more vomit was going to grace the Sturniolo household.

Well the Lord wasn't happy with his thanks.

As Chris was standing up, he immediately fell to his knees and vomited again, missing the bowl completely.

"Fuck" Nick screamed, not even caring to think about how bad Chris would have felt at that moment.

--

Matt started to clean up the milk, throwing the cartons they did their YouTube video with away. He was going to sue them for whatever Chris did in his bathroom. He knew it wasn't going to be pretty.

But he wasn't thinking dead-set ugly 'till he heard Nick yell "fuck" at the top of his lungs.

Matt picked up the blog camera. "Well, your outro is me cleaning up milk while Chris and Nick have fun ejecting their organs since I can't deal with vomit. Anyways. See you Friday for our car video, shouldn't feature vomit, I don't know" Matt then grabbed the camera and screamed into it before shutting it off.

He then placed it down on the couch and went to finish cleaning the milk.

Nick walked out of the bathroom. If Matt didn't know any better, he would have thought Nick just saw Abraham Lincoln based on his facial expression.

Disclaimer. It was not Abraham.

"What's wrong?" Matt questioned.

Nick stumbled over to the staircase that led to his room. "Chris has finished vomiting-"

"So are you going to help him down the stairs so he can sleep?" Matt cut Nick off, the housewife was mothering today.

"No" Nick stated.

Matt sighed. "What happened?"

"He missed the toilet bowl and he is now leaning against the wall probably asleep, I don't know. Anywho. I'm gonna go to bed. Night" Nick then sprinted up the stairs, stumbling up a couple of them.

Matt crept into his bathroom like it was a crime scene.

It technically was with vomit as blood and Chris as the dead person.

"Matty. I don't feel well. I fucking hate milk and that bitchass brother named Nick. Who leaves their sick brother with his vomit?!" Chris exclaimed. It was evident that he was tired, yawning a lot and his eyes pretty much closed.

Matt shrugged and walked to Chris. He pulled him up, careful not to touch any part of him that had vomit on him. It was like "The floor is lava" but "The vomit on Chris is lava"

He led him out of his wing of the house and down the stairs. "Ok, go to sleep"

"I can't" Chris whined, not even closing his eyes. "Can I sleep with you?"

Matt looked at his brother, he was pale from the vomiting he had just done. Matt then remembered he probably should let Chris have some water, and hydrate him a bit. But Chris would live. "We can all sleep in Nick's room. My room smells like vomit"

Chris nodded and got out of bed, he then trotted up two staircases.

Matt followed sleepily.

"Nick. We are crashing in your room. Mine smells like vomit" Matt announced, falling into Nick's bed. Chris snuggled into the middle of the bed. Nick just stood at the edge of the bed, in disbelief. "I'm sleeping in Chris's room. Night" He then walked down both lots of stairs.

Too many stairs.

--

"We need to use this milk up" Nick opened the fridge and announced the harsh truth the next day.

Chris put his face on the table, refusing to look at the dreaded drink. "I rather die. I'm not vomiting again"

Matt rolled his eyes and patted his brother on the back. "It's ok Chris. I rather die than have you vomit again in my bathroom"

Nick studied the milk. "So what do we do with it?"

Everyone shrugged.

Matt shrugged.

Chris shrugged.

Obama shrugged.

The Queen shrugged.

Taylor Swift shrugged.

Kim Kardashian shrugged.

The word shrugged, shrugged.

--

Notice how the lines in the last bit progressively get longer?

Anyways. Look at me updating twice in a week. Been a while. AND I DID A REQUEST. AHHH.

Let me know what you think cause I'm not big on the whole "normal sick fic" thing. Like I rarely have vomiting around here.

Send through requests guys, the more I have, the more I know I need to write <3

Love youuuuuu

-Bon