I wasn't angry. I was livid. 

How dare that shameless measle speak to me like that! I could have her head for it. People have died for less, I'm sure. 

Uh, happy thoughts, happy thoughts. A glorious battle, the dead witch, cute babies, shirtless Peter. Nope, still furious. 

I sighed exasperatedly as we made a turn left. Familiars. As if I would ever allow for that to happen. 

"That bad, huh?" Peter said nonchalantly.  

"You have no idea," I muttered through gritted teeth. 

"Why don't you tell me?" he said with his hands in his pockets. 

I shook my head trying to clear my thoughts. They were far too vulgar to be expressed. "You should have heard her, she is mad, Peter, mad,"

"You always say that," Peter points out. 

"I know, but this time it is true. She," I said, pointing towards the direction where we had dinner, "is mad. Look, Peter, I know you have this treaty hanging by the threads, but I can't stand her any longer. I won't, I-I simply can't, she has to go," 

"You know I can't make her disappear," he says nudging me playfully. 

"I didn't mean have her killed," I rolled my eyes at him (not that I'd object to the idea) "I meant she's done being my lady. I have endured her for the past two years but I'm afraid she has just drained my patience. I just can't deal with her anymore. I am done," 

"Can't you just ignore her?" Peter suggests. 

"No, I can't just ignore her. I have ignored her for the past few years and it hasn't proved productive," What a silly suggestion. "You know, this time she talked smack about you," 

"Me? What did she have to say about me?" he asked, rather surprised. 

"She said you were cheating on me," 

"What?!" he stopped and stared at me. 

"With Lady Alexis," I said, crossing my arms. 

"What!!? That's ridiculous! You don't actually believe her, do you?" 

No, but now I'm wondering... "Have you seen her lately?" I hate asking, but I just have to. 

"You believe her?" Peter asks offended. 

"You didn't answer my question," I point out, staring back at him. 

He sighed frustrated and pinched the bridge of his nose before answering. "I ran into her last week a couple of times. She was here to see her father," 

Seriously?! "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked now vexed at him. 

"Because it was an irrelevant event of my day! I didn't pay her a second thought, I didn't know I had to tell you," And now he's mad at me. Lovely. 

Screw you, Danielle. Now we're fighting and it's all your fault. 

"Alright," I reply hessitantly. If we fight, she wins. And I refuse to let her win. 

"So is that it? Is that why you want her gone?" Peter asks irritated. "That's just silly gossip," 

"That wasn't it," I protest. "She also insinuated herself into my family," 

"She what?" he asks confused. 

"That babbling open-arsed writhled shrimp suggested she is going to marry Darren," I explain.

"What?!" He asks with a laugh. "That's... are you sure that's what she meant?" 

I nod. "She was very clear," 

"Oh, you can't actually believe her. You once told me she told you she planned on marrying me. That girl's delusional!" 

"Yes, I know she's deranged, but she can't say things like this. What if she tricks him into it?! I can't allow that to happen. If she marries him I'll never get rid of her. She'll be there in weddings, funerals, holidays, dinners, parties..." 

"So you think it's true," Peter says, considering the idea.

"I don't know, I mean, it can't be true. It can't be. Henry told me Darren saw Princess Dæsella while on Datram,"

"Acanthæan?" he asks just like I did earlier on. 

"Yes," 

"And when you say see you mean..." 

"I mean the same way we saw each other shortly after I moved here," 

He smirks. "That was fun," 

It was, but I am too upset to smirk back. "Yes, it was. But, you see, if word reaches Princess Dæsella of this then everything will go aflame. Both figuratively and literally," 

"You think he'd actually marry her?" he turns to me in disbelief. 

"How knows the inner workings of Darren's mind! I'd like to think he knows better than to lead an Acanthæan on, but I don't know. All I know is that James has asked me to make sure he breaks up with her, and if he intends to marry her, then I plan to stop him," 

"So you have a plan?" Peter asks. 

No, I don't. "I'll... I'll talk to him," 

"I meant something other than talking to him," 

I know what you meant. "I don't know I-I simply must speak to him as soon as he arrives to find out if this is true, and if it is, convince him otherwise," 

He doesn't seem convinced, but he nods and we continue walking. 

"Do you want to take a walk in the garden?" he asks a few minutes later out of the blue. 

What? 

I look out the windows. A cloudless sky, thousands of stars and a bright half-moon. "It's late," 

"So? We can do as we please," he says with a cheeky smile. 

Yes, we can. 

"What are you doing tomorrow?" Peter asks, throwing another pebble at the ocean. 

"I don't know. Whatever Henry tells me I must," I reply taking a rock from the many I hold on my left fist and throwing it as far as I can. It shoots across the sky and I watch it plummet to the sea until it is lost. 

"How would you like to go sailing?" He asks. Another rock flies towards darkness. 

"Sailing? Tomorrow?" Where did this come from. 

"Why not?" he shrugs and throws another. 

"But where? Don't you have lots of things to do?" I place my fistful of rocks on the banister and turn to stare at him. 

"Nothing I can't do from our ship," Another rock disappears. "I could use a change of scenery," he throws the last pebble and turns to face me. 

The moon is behind him so his face is mostly obscured, but he seems to have a small smile. "That actually sounds great," I could use a change of scenery myself. "Oh, but what if Darren returns? I really ought to speak with him," 

"Why don't you have Henry speak to him?" Peter suggests, at which I can't help but laugh. 

"Yes, because Darren will listen to him," 

"But he'll listen to you?" 

"At least I have a chance," 

He ponders this for a while. "Very well then, we'll go after your cousin arrives and you speak to him," 

"Not a day later," I reply and wrap my arms around him. 

He wraps an arm around my shoulder and kisses the top of my head. "Do you want to head back?" 

It's late, I am tired and thirsty, and it's chilly. "Yes, I'm cold,"  

We start to head back in, but something flies towards me. Something dark and small flapping its wings making a high-pitched sound. I hate bats! I shriek as it comes towards my head and crouch covering my head with my arms. Peter puts a hand on my back and pushes forward, laughing as I do a mix of screaming, crying and laughing while I run until we reach the castle. 

"I fuking hate those things!" I say laughing, trying to literally shake off the bat, even though it's long gone. 

Peter just starts laughing hysterically. Just a loud, heartfelt laugh which I can't help but join in. 

All the earlier screaming must have alerted the palace guards because a few seconds later a faun and a centaur come running in, spears in hand, ready to fight off the threat. 

I picture it, a faun and a centaur chasing after a bat. For some reason, I find the image of this extremely hilarious and I start to laugh the most rambunctious laughter. The more I laugh the less room I have for air so I soon find myself with my hands on my knees trying to catch a breath laughing quite silently, which just amuses me even more. My abdomen hurts now and I am certain I must look ridiculous, but I find myself unable to stop or breathe correctly. They must think I am having a heart attack or have been bitten by a poisonous snake or something. 

"Your Majesty, are you alright?" the faun asks approaching, but I hold out a hand to stop him. 

I am far too amused to compose myself or answer. I try, but I can't seem to be able to get past the word I. 

"We're... we're alright," Peter manages to say while I continue laughing. 

I look up and catch them giving us an awkward look before going away. I turn to look at Peter and find him staring at me. A second later we begin to laugh again. 

It takes us a couple of minutes to get all the laughter out of our systems, but at last, we start to behave normally. 

"My... my stomach hurts," I say, wiping away a tear from all the laughter and drawing deep breaths. 

"Mine too," he says. 

"What do you think they- hic!" SERIOUSLY?! Now hiccups? 

Peter tries to contain the laughter but fails miserably. His stupid laugh is so contagious I find myself laughing once more and having spontaneous outbursts of hiccups. Okay, this is painful now. 

"Oww," I complain and he immediately understands what I mean. 

"Why don't you go back out there? Maybe the..." but the laughter beats him, "maybe the bat will scare it away!" He breaks into laughter again. 

I slap his arm. "Shut up! What I need is- hic! some water,"

Peter looked down both ends of the hallway. "I believe the kitchen is closest," he said pointing to the left with his chin. 

"-Hic! Then to the kitchen it is," 

Peter continuously tried to scare me on our way to the kitchen in an unwelcomed effort to get rid of my hiccups, but it didn't work. 

Peter went down the stars first, I insisted. I was sure he'd try to scare me once more in a last attempt to cure me. I had had enough jumpscares for the night. 

"Edmund?" Peter asked when he arrived to the bottom. 

"They're here?" I ask him, for I am still walking down the stairs. 

"Peter!" I heard Edmund's voice echo up the stairs, "Hey, what are you-" 

I reach the kitchen at last and step out of Peter's shadow. 

"Imira!" Darren says, wiping some bread crumbs off his mouth.  

"-hic! Darren? When did you two- hic! get here?"  

"Around an hour ago. Are you drunk?" he asks with a smirk. Peter tries to hide a laugh. 

"What? No. I just have hiccups," I manage to get out the sentence. "-hic!" 

"Here, have some water," Edmund says, offering his cup. 

Peter takes it from him and hands it to me. 

"Better?" he asks once I've emptied it. 

I hold up a finger and wait to see if it has had the intended result. 

"I think so," I say pleased. It was starting to get annoying. 

"So, what are the two of you doing back here? Aren't you supposed to be hunting ghosts?"Peter asks them. 

"Ghost. Singular. There was only one," Edmund points out. "But we took care of it," 

"-hic!" Oh, mother of-

Peter smiles and pours me more water. 

"Yes. It took us a while, but we got rid of it," Edmund says nonchalantly. 

"Only one!? Whatever took you so long?" Peter asks. 

"Hunting ghosts is far more complicated than you realize. You wouldn't understand," Edmund retorts, earning an eye roll from his brother as I empty my cup only to pour more water back in it. Just to be safe. 

"So you were successful then," I say between sips. 

"Oh, yes. The Western Woods are a ghost-free zone," Edmund says proudly while my cousin finishes an apple. 

"That's fantastic, but what are you two doing down here? Shouldn't you be upstairs, celebrating?" I ask. 

"We weren't feeling like having a formal dinner upstairs or anything like it, so we just came down here to grab a bite," Edmund says. "But tomorrow you can celebrate us all you want," 

"A parade would be nice," Darren adds with a goofy grin. 

These two and their parades. Every time they do something they want a celebration in their honour. 

"Oh, gee, we'd love to, but we are sailing off tomorrow at noon," Peter tells them pretending to be upset. Not a day later, indeed, huh? "But I'm certain Susan and Lucy would love to hear all about your exploits and..." 

If we are to leave tomorrow then I better confront Darren. Now seems as good a time as any. 

"So you haven't talked to anyone yet?" I ask my cousin while Peter and Edmund talk. 

"No, we came directly for the food," he says before taking a bite from some sort of sandwich. 

Perfect! 

"Huh, well then allow me to be the first to say congratulations!" 

I spot from Edmund from the corner of my eye pointing at me. 

"You see, Pete, that's the spirit!" 

Peter just holds back a smile knowing what I'm up to. 

"Thank you," Edmund continues. "It was a tad more difficult than I anticipated, but I found this old book before I left and-" 

"I didn't mean the ghost," I stop him. "I mean, congratulations on that as well, but I was talking about Darren's news," 

"My news?" he asks with a mouthful of food. 

"Yes, your news. Don't play dumb, cousin, Danielle already told me. You two are to be married! Congratulations!" 

"You're getting married?" Edmund asks in a laugh and Darren starts choking on his sandwich.

"I..." he takes a drink to clear his throat. "I what?!" 

"Oh, don't act so surprised, she told me. You can stop pretending," I say, acting as if I were happy about it. Though I'll admit, his reaction is very amusing. 

"She-she said that?" he asks, emptying his cup. 

 "Yes. Peter and I just had dinner with her family, she told me right before we left. Is it some sort of secret? Was I not supposed to mention it?" I ask faking ignorance.  

"Mate, I thought you liked the Acanthean princess," Edmund says, kicking him on the shin. 

"Oww," 

"Princess Dæsella?" I ask already knowing the answer. 

"That's the one! He went on and on about her all week long," Edmund complains. "She's so beautiful. She smells like peaches, wouldn't shut up about her," 

"That's not alright, mate," Peter adds, filling my cup again. Huh, I thought he would stay out of it. 

"Aslan's mane, Darren, you are not leading her on, are you? I thought you knew better than to mess with an Acanthæan," I say disapprovingly. 

"I'm not, I..." he sighs exasperatedly. "I met her in Datram, yes, but I'm not leading her on," he laughs a bit at the end. 

"Then what is this business about marrying Danielle?" I question him. 

He chuckles. "Look, I don't know where she got that idea from, and, although I understand why she may want that to be the case, I am not marrying her. You must have misheard her," he says dismissing the idea with humor. 

"No, I heard what I heard," I insist. "And I heard it for quite a while because she went on and on and on about how you love her and how you two are taking "the next step" in your relationship and how she and I are going to become familiars. She was very clear," I tell him and go back to drinking water, not noticing the hiccups are gone. 

"That is absurd," Darren insists laughing, and goes back to eating. 

"In that case, you better inform her there's been some sort of confusion. Who knows who she has told already! I know it is unlikely after how she said it to me, but I do hope she hasn't told her parents. It would be terrible if they thought you were marrying their daughter when it's actually all in her head. In any case, you better clear things up with her before she starts planning your wedding," 

He chuckles. "I am not marrying her," he replies calmly and keeps eating. 

Why is he so bloody calm about it?! He is such an oddball. If someone was going around telling others he is to become my husband I'd be flipping out. 

"Well, don't tell me, tell her!" I reply laughing nervously. 

He considers it for a second but dismisses the idea. "Nah, it'll blow over," and goes back to eating his sandwich. 

"I don't really see it blowing over if she starts telling people," Peter says calmly. "I see it turning into a big bloody mess," he says, emphasizing the last three words. "A mess that might escalate into conflict. I'd rather not have any quarrels of this sort in Narnia at the moment, Darren," 

The King has spoken. 

"Look, mate, you do what you do, but you can't lead the princess on. It's not right. You either end it with her or end it with Lady Danielle," Edmund adds. How uncharacteristically supportive of him. 

"Don't worry about it," Darren says. 

"Darren," I start to say, but he cuts me off. 

"I'll break up with Danielle, okay?!" he says flipping out. "River gods, can't a man finish his dinner?" 

"Really?" I ask. 

"Yes," he says annoyed." I'm getting bored with her anyways. She's a little too clingy," 

Ah, so he does have eyes. 

"And Princess Dæsella?" I ask. 

"Her I like," Darren says. "I'll see where it goes with that one," 

As long as where it goes is far away from Danielle I'm not about to complain. 

"Happy now?" Peter asks, throwing some wood into the fire as I bury myself with the sheets. 

"Quite pleased," I reply with a smile and hear him chuckle. "So, at what time are we leaving tomorrow?" 

"Right. I was thinking noon. That should be enough time for the captain to assemble the crew and load the supplies," 

"Shouldn't we give him a fair warning?" I ask. "It is a bit hastened, don't you think?" 

"No, they should ready themselves to sail on quick notice. Some day there may be an emergency for which there'll be no warning. This should be good practice," 

That's a good point. "Noon it is then," 

He finishes with the fire and goes over to his side. 

"I was thinking and, if it really means that much to you, you can dismiss Lady Danielle," he says as if it were nothing. 

"Really?!" I ask sitting up. Where did this come from? 

He chuckles. "Really. If she makes our blood boil so much, then yes. I'll deal with Lord Doninger if he has anything to say. There really is no good reason to keep her around anymore,"

Well, this night just keeps getting better and better! "Thank you," I reach over and kiss his cheek. 

"You're welcome, love," 

Ah, this is wonderful! I get to go on a trip, Darren is breaking up with her and now I can dismiss her? This day turned out better than I could have anticipated. Oh, tomorrow is going to be a jolly good day.