A/N: This chapter contains a trigger warning for violence, mental health struggles, emotional distress, and death.

I apologize in advance D:

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"Damn it, you'll pay for this!" A guy's yell jolted me awake, and I saw him charging at me with a spear. I tried reaching for the knife, but it was too far away. I scrambled to my feet instead and bolted back the way I came.

I thought the woods would be a great place to be alone, but that's clearly not the case right now.

He snatched my forearm, his nails digging deep into my skin, pinning me down. I kept forcing his spear away from me so I couldn't get stabbed, but he was too strong. Though I dodged his attempts to stab me, his blade still left painful cuts.

The pain was excruciating, being forced down to the ground with tiny rocks prickling my bare arms.

After several attempts, I wriggled free and sprinted out of the woods, ignoring the pain as I kept yelling for help without looking back. As I ran, the world around me blurred, my heartbeat pounding in my ears, and a million thoughts raced through my mind.

Why was he even chasing me?

Fear and confusion combined, pushing me to run faster.

My cries must have caught the attention of others because soon people were rushing out of the Council Hall at the far end of the Glade.

Frypan spotted me and immediately darted back inside, and it wasn't long before Newt and Minho came running out to me. Chuck and Thomas followed.

"Wren!" Newt's voice trembled with fear as he sprinted towards me. Seeing him brought a flicker of hope.

I sprinted as fast as I could, hoping I could outrun the Runner. I kept my focus ahead of me, getting closer and closer to the others.

But he caught up.

He jumped on me, tackling me to the ground by my waist.

"This is your fault! You let them do this to me, you useless piece of shit!" He screamed, his face filled with rage as he tried to flip me around so I could face him.

I struggled and tried to grab his spear. That's when I noticed his arms: veiny, bulging, and unnaturally darker than before. I took a closer look at his face and it was pale, the whites of his eyes were now almost black.

He went on a rant about how he wanted to kill me, that I did that to him.

While he was distracted by his ranting, I pushed him with all my might, flipped him over, and pinned his arms down at his side with my knees, straddling his stomach.

When I finally got a hold of his spear, I tried to bring myself to stab him with it, but I couldn't do it.

I hesitated, the spear shaking in my hand. I couldn't kill him, I didn't want to.

I can't.

But then I realized that killing him here instead of letting him die in the maze would mean one less Griever to deal with.

At least he won't suffer becoming a Griever.

Everything became blurry around me, I could only hear my own heart, violently beating. I couldn't feel anything anymore.

This is payback for holding me earlier.

"Wren, stop!"

With a heavy heart, I closed my eyes. I lifted the spear and plunged it into his chest.

His body convulsed, dark fluid seeping out. Tears escaped my eyes as my arms grew weak, lifting the spear from his chest and letting it go beside his body.

Silence filled the Glade as they stared at me in shock. Then slowly, they all murmured, stealing disgusted glances at me.

"Why did you kill Ben?!" Gally's voice rose above the others. His anger was visible, but I could see the confusion in his eyes.

I tried to stand, but my legs felt like jelly. Thomas gently helped me up by guiding me by the arm, which I quickly pulled away.

I don't want anyone touching me.

And my hands are dirty.

I'm a killer.

I stared at the lifeless body as Gally continued to yell at me, with Hank joining in. The others threw insults at me. I stood there for minutes, staring at nothing.

Even after they buried him. Even after the Gladers went back to their tasks. Even after Newt told me I did nothing wrong.

But I did. I obviously did.

I had just killed a person.

But it's fine, right? He was stung, like Alby.

But they didn't kill Alby.

They brought him to the Med-hut, monitoring his condition.

What have I done?

Why did I?

How could I?

"Ben was stung, wasn't he?" Minho's cold voice cut through the chaos in my mind. I glanced at him with guilt filling me up when I saw his unreadable face.

I had just killed his friend.

I looked down before nodding, hiding my face because I was ashamed of what I just did to his friend.

He sighed and started to walk towards me, "You weren't wrong for killing him. It's either that or we'd have to banish him by forcing him into the maze. He was gonna die either way–"

I wiped away tear-stained cheeks and avoided his gaze. "Not the point," I mumbled coldly.

I just killed Ben. He was just alive this morning, now I just stabbed him.

His body convulsed, dark fluid seeping out.

I shut my eyes for a while, still disturbed by the sight of his body convulsing earlier, a different color of blood spreading on his shirt.

I opened my eyes and turned around to head to my bunker when he reached me.

"What happened?" Minho was walking beside me as he pointed to my side, frowning.

I glanced at where he was pointing at and saw my forearm, all bloody and scratched. I hadn't even noticed the injury because of the adrenaline, but now I felt it raw. I felt lightheaded.

Shit, where's my button-up?

Fear and guilt started to sink in again, but I quickly shrugged it off. "I dunno–" I kept walking, ignoring the blood dripping on the grass.

"How did it get that big?" He persisted, blocking my way as he eyed my wound with his arms crossed.

I know he'll keep bothering me if I just dismiss him, so I just stopped trying, groaning in defeat. "Look, I don't know. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have something else to do."

Lock myself up in my room, except rooms don't exist here. No doors, no privacy. So yeah.

I made a 'shoo' gesture and brushed past him which thankfully, he didn't block my way.

I took several steps when I heard his scoff, jogging up to my side, "Your lips are pale, Bean. You're losing a lot of blood, and that's dangerous, y'know? Especially getting scratched by someone who got stung. Who knows what would happen—"

Fed up, I turned to him. "Shut up, okay? No need to point out the obvious, I can handle myself."

I don't want anyone touching me.

He just scoffed, "Uh-huh, sure you can, Beanie."

"The Med-hut won't go anywhere, I can go later. But for now, leave me alone." I said, irritation in my voice before turning around to leave.

"Where are you going?" His voice lost the hint of playfulness and became serious.

Seriously, he's so dumb. I was literally a few steps away from my bunker.

Ignoring him, I cradled my arm as I continued to head to my bunk, trying not to freak out at the fact that I was actually bleeding out so much.

"Don't make me carry you to the Med-hut." He called out, his voice stern.

"As if you would do that."

He scoffed, catching up to me, "Oh, I will, Beanie."

"Mhm, yeah okay, strong guy." I snorted.

It went quiet, so I thought he just gave up and let me be. Until he muttered under his breath, his voice raspy, "Stubborn girl."

Before I could even face him, he carried me, his right arm cradling my back, close to my waist, and his other arm was under my legs, carrying the back of my knees.

"You asshole!" I protested, hitting his chest.

"Damn it, you can't just– shit!" I forgot I was injured for a second, so when I smacked his chest with my right arm, I felt a sharp pain across it. I flail my legs instead, to make it difficult to carry me but he didn't budge. 

Of course, he didn't, he had a strong grip and a buff build.

Shut the fuck up. I don't give a crap.

"Shucking hell, stay still." He muttered, irritation etched all over his face as he continued walking towards the Med-hut. I rolled my eyes and just stopped moving. It wasn't worth draining my energy for this jerk.

Not knowing where to put my arms, I put it close to my stomach, the blood spreading across my tank top.

I noticed there was also blood on his shirt now. "Damn, there's a lot of blood on you. My bad."

"No worries, Bean."

He replied without looking at me, his voice was quiet.

The air between us was awkward, or that was at least what I felt like.

But this guy? I doubt he feels anything besides annoyance, anger, and pride.

I felt the need to break the silence again, just so I wouldn't pay attention to the feeling of being in his strong but gentle grasp. It was highly unlikely for me to act this way, awkward and dependent.

I mean why was I even thinking this way?

"Strong but gentle grasp"?

Oh shut the fuck up, what is going on?

"Where's Jeff?" Minho's voice pulled me out of my thoughts when we stopped by a group of Gladers around a shed.

They all looked our way, but their gaze went to me and my bloody arm. I just glared at them, knowing they were all judging me for being in Minho's arms. 

And for being a killer. 

Minho audibly sighed when no one answered him, "I don't have all day y'know?" He frowned at them. "Again, where is Jeff?" He urged once again.

"Asher?" Minho turned to a younger freckled boy with golden hair when no one replied.

"Uh..." Asher stood up, his wide eyes never leaving my bloody arm. "He...um, I don't know."

Minho groaned and turned to the others, who just shrugged.

I cleared my throat, "You know you can just leave me in the Med-hut and wait there–"

"Jeff, med assistance!" He suddenly yelled, cutting me off. He casually gripped my waist more tightly before walking away from the others.

"He's literally nowhere to be found–"

We headed to the Med-hut with Jeff sprinting inside not long after we did.

What the hell? Where did he come from?

He sighed and placed me on the bed. He immediately stomped out of the room after, mumbling things only that idiot could hear.

Jeff first applied pressure to stop the bleeding which went on for several minutes. He then examined my wound, saying it needed stitches.

Of course, I protested for several minutes because I wasn't fond of– no, I hated physical touch, let alone having a needle and thread poke through back and forth my skin to close it back.

He remained calm, trying to hold back his laughter, and reassured me, "It'd be a quick one, Wren. Most of the Gladers 'round here had it."

"And how is that supposed to make me feel better?!"

He just chuckled and cleaned the wounds one last time before getting the other medical supplies. He handed me a wooden spoon.

He pointed at the bigger cut. "This cut is at least 3 inches long but it's not that deep. Might hurt a lil', so bite on this and lie down, straight." He said calmly and started to poke the needle through my skin as soon as I lay down. I couldn't help but scream at the pain.

"What do you mean the cut is not that deep when it needs stitches?!" I yelled through the spoon, glaring at him. "And how is this pain 'little' Jeff?!"

I kept yelling in pain and threw curse words at Jeff every now and then, which was never my intention. It was an automatic response.

The stitching and screaming went on for about several minutes before Minho burst back in, leaving the door wide open. "Why the hell are you screaming?" He raised his voice through all the yells I did.

I jerked my head up and glared at him, "Get out!" I muttered with the spoon still in between my teeth and placed my head back down on the pillow.

Rolling his eyes, he closed the door and just stood there, watching the stitching procedure with pure disgust on his face.

I bet he'd go crazy if he was the one being stitched up right now.

"How long is that going to heal?" He pointed at my arm.

"With a wound this big and a poor stitch like this, approximately four to six weeks–"

"Weeks?! That's basically almost two months." I exclaimed. My eyes widened, facing Jeff as he was focused on slowly stitching me up, unfazed by all the commotion I was causing.

How am I gonna go in the maze then?

"Can I do stuff, like, let's say...go in the maze if ever?" I whispered to him but he shook his head. "Then how the fuck–"

"Good thing I didn't allow you to come with us then." Minho announced in a 'matter of fact' tone, chuckling. He heard what I whispered.

I removed the spoon from my mouth using my left hand, "Can you seriously get out of here?"

"Nope. I'm busy feeling sorry for you, for not going in with us and for that." He taunted, eyeing my arm.

"Do you have any hobbies besides being an ass?"

I felt dizzy.

"Yep, having an amazing ass and biceps." He held his chin up while he flexed his arms.

Okay, ew. I need bleach for my eyes.

He turned around to leave when suddenly Thomas burst in.

"Hey, will this be enough?" Thomas asked Minho, pointing to Newt, Winston, Frypan, Clint, Mav, and Zart, who were waiting outside the door.

"What?"

"I figured since you and Wren are here, why not discuss it right here, right now? Especially..." Thomas trailed off and glanced at me.

Minho also glanced at me, "Yeah, yeah, not exactly the time for that, man," he muttered.

I avoided their gazes and watched the others as they went in, gathering at the end of my cot.

Some of them darted their eyes at me, their eyes widening at the sight of blood. Mav waved at me, his smile sad. I was about to give him a half-hearted smile as a reply until I was interrupted by Minho's loud groan.

Weird ass.

Thomas went beside Minho, "You said she can–"

"No dumbass, I didn't say anything!" Minho interrupted. "She's not with us in this! It's too dangerous. And even if she is, she can't. The shuck-face is wounded–"

"I have a fucking name already!" I snapped, jerking my head up but I felt pain so I laid back down as Jeff went back to stitching my forearm.

My vision was getting blurry.

"Hey," Newt greeted me with a sad smile, standing at the left side of my cot. "Sorry, I didn't notice that earlier." He pointed at my arm. "You alright, Bird?"

His face was full of concern so I gave him a reassuring smile, which I never did to just anyone. "I'm okay, thanks."

He's too nice. I didn't mind that nickname, it made me feel safe.

Okay, shut up.

This is so highly unlike me. It might be the effects of what happened today that I'd rather not talk about.

I'd rather die of blood loss.

But I need to escape. Just not by death though.

"Glade to Wren," He waved his hand to my face. "You keep zoning out, you sure you're alright?" He felt my forehead with the back of his palm and turned to Jeff, "Is she alright? Does being scratched by someone who got stung will somehow affect her brain?"

Jeff shook his head, "She's okay, I can assure you that. But," He looked at Newt for a moment.

But?

"Mentally, I don't think so." He glanced at me before going back to stitching me up.

Damn right, I won't.

"She's not even a Runner, so why are we even– no, my mistake, why are you considering her to be a part of this?! I told you she can't and that. Is. Final." Minho's raised voice caught our attention, he was pointing at Mav. "And as far as I know, you ain't even the Keeper of the Runners, hell you ain't even a Runner, Maverick."

"Since when do you call me that?!" He shot back.

"Since now, because you're annoying the hell out of me."

Mav was about to argue back at him when I suddenly yelped in pain. My attention went to my arm as I felt uncomfortable with the stitches on my skin.

"Damn it!" Jeff muttered under his breath as he tried to grab the cloth beside my arm. The cut reopened, causing me to bleed out again.

"We might have to amputate," Clint mumbled and Jeff just scowled at him.

"What?!" My eyes felt like they were gonna fall out of the sockets.

I turned to Newt who was looking at my arm in horror which made my heart beat faster, in a bad way. I could basically feel his panic too, and it was worse than mine.

Sweat started to form in the palm of my hands, and it was getting stuffy again. So I shut my eyes and bit on the wooden spoon, controlling my raged breaths.

My eyes were shut hard. I saw white particles. My jaw was hurting due to being clenched too hard.

The voices of the Gladers were replaced by ringing in my ears.

And before I knew it, the spoon slipped out of my mouth.

Voices. Ringing.

"Everyone, get out." Newt.

Noise. Yelling.

"Get out! Don't go killing her!" A female voice.

It hurts. So bad. I hate it.

The pain started to feel pleasant. Not in a good way, but it made me forget everything, so that's good. I like it.

I won't be weak anymore if I accept the pain.

A/N: I know this is a minho fanfic yet there are so few interactions between them T-T. It turned out to be a slow burn which I didn't intend to be but I promise it'll come around in chapter 8 (hopefully). This is just for character dev or smth I'm not playing w yall. Pls don't hate me 

I also dunno much about fighting scenes or medical stuff so don't mind how it wasn't really accurate :-P

I hope yall are still enjoying, lemme know what you think so far<3