⚠️ Warning ⚠️

I really don't know how to write smut. But I guess some of you are under 16, and so if someone doesn't like a few smuts can skip this chapter. Well, I didn't write that much of smut but still if you feel uncomfortable then skip. Thanks.

I loved you so much, that even when you hurt me

I tried to understand you

Your POV:

I started to breathe heavily as cold sweats start to roll down from my body. I can't hold my tears, slowly it's getting really hard for me to breath.

Why is he here? Why is he doing this to me? Why does it's always me who is the only one to get hurt? Why he always hurts me, hurts my pride? He crashes them into pieces. I want to run away from his grip. How did he barge inside my room? What is wrong with him?

Taehyung came to my room all of a sudden and laid on my bed, wrapping his big arms around my body. I was so shocked to see him. I was ready to leave the room and let him sleep here.

But suddenly he pulls me back and hugs me tightly. I tried my best to get out from his grip, all the time he kept babbling about us separating.

Are you that happy? Am I really a worthless piece of trash to you? Do you really think I am the type of entertaining men's and climb up on their bed? Do you really hate me so much?

My tears never stopped falling from my eyes the moment he started to talk.

Suddenly while I was struggling to get out from his grip I felt something wet on the back of my neck. At this time my bathrobe has loosened up and my body is almost exposed.

Every time I struggle to get rid of him, every time he will tighten his grip on me and keeps pulling me close to him. I'm tired, I've lost all my energy. I just want to sleep and never wake up.

But suddenly taehyung moves and makes me face him. He's now on top of me staring blankly, there were no emotions in his eyes. Fear was all over me, my body started to shiver. I tried to take advantage of this moment and push him aside but before I could do anything taehyung smash his lips against mine.

I was taken aback and shock. With my widen eyes I tried to look into his eyes, I couldn't react because of the sudden shock. I tried to push him away however he grabs both of my hands and intertwines them tightly with his. Because he was so close to me I can smell the alcohol come from him.

'he is drunk. Heavily drunk.'

At first, his kiss was gentle enough to melt anyone and get lost into the kiss. But suddenly he started to kiss me so roughly which made me moan in pain. I need to get away from him asap. I don't want to make the situation more complicated than before. He will humility me again and will throw all the blame on me. I can't just let that happen.

I struggle a lot to get rid of him. But even if he's drunk and he is too strong. Slowly it was getting hard for me to breathe. Fortunately, he parts his lips from mine, I took the opportunity to breathe out heavily. But this didn't stop him from going down to my neck and place some wet kisses.

I couldn't take his force on me anymore, I was losing all my strength. If this keeps going on I won't be able to stop him from going any further. I started to sob while struggling. I called his name and told him to stop a thousand times but he never stopped.

Just the way he hurt my heart and my pride, he hurt me in every possible way he could. He is a monster. A beast. I admit I fell in love with a cold-hearted beast. After this, I'll never wish to see his face. I would rather die than face him again.

'I will remember this night forever.'

Taehyung pulls himself away from me and starts to take off his clothes. I am so scared that my mind couldn't process what to do next, should I run? What if he catches me and tries to hurt me again. I still struggle to get up but taehyung was fast to grab both my shoulders and push me down as he again places his lips on mine.

His gentle, so gentle. His lips are soft and warm. I want to taste them more. I don't want to become so greedy, I want to run away. I don't want him to do such a thing when he's not sober.

He bites my lips and murmurs Something in between the kiss, I couldn't hear clearly. I was so lost in my thoughts. My hands were resting on his back and his one hands were in my hair and another one was roaming around my body. His hands are cold, so cold that it gives me chill down my spine.

"I love you." I hear him saying in a whisper. I immediately open my eyes and look down at his Handsome face which is so close to me. I stopped struggling and let him do whatever he wanted to do next. The words he said made me numb forcefully. 'what did he just say?'

He parts his lips from mine and gives some space to breathe. He goes down to my neck then comes close to my ears and says in a low tone, "I love you. I love you so much Heejin."

My eyes shoot wide as soon as I hear him Calling another woman's name after those words. I couldn't feel my heart beating anymore. What is it? Why do I feel like something is squeezing so hard inside my chest? Please stop it! It's hurting, it's so painful.

"Please stay with me. I fought with my family for you. I left that wicked woman for you. Don't leave me." He says as he places gentle kisses on my cheeks.

Unknowingly I started to laugh. My heart is laughing, I couldn't feel anything but disgust. The disgust of myself, I feel so pity for myself.

'Fu*k y/n-shii you're screwed'

I stopped struggling, I stopped myself from letting him take my first, my first when the men I love is not sober enough. The man I love is not sober enough to know who he is with now. If I can sacrifice my pride and my love for him, then this is the last. The last and the least.

He was close enough to hear the words I am going to say next. I close my eyes and let the tears drop from the corner. I smile bitterly and said, "I wish you good luck, Kim TaeHyung." I whisper into his ears.

No one ever made me feel so incredible. At the same so pity and hateful like you did taehyung. I never felt so pitiful when someone called me a murderer when someone blamed me for the death of my parents. When everyone called me a bad omen when everyone called me a gold digger just because your father and grandfather wanted me to be their daughter-in-law.

What made me feel like this is When you called me a prostitute. A gold digger, a wicked witch who wanted to climb on to your bed. When you said you never would have agreed to marry such bad luck if your family never forced you to. Those made me pity for myself.

Now the disgusting feeling I'm having is when I get to realize that the men I loved for so many days actually wanted to get rid of me because of a woman and his so happy. The fact that I'm letting you hurt me in every possible way just to make myself hate. Make Myself hate so much that when I think about you I must think about our last encounter. The last time I'm letting you hurt me, the last goodbye.

I hope we never face each other. Never in this life. And even if we do, I wish I close my eyes before seeing your face. Because that's the most painful thing I wouldn't love to see before closing my eyes forever.

Hope to see such love never. Nor in the next life. Good luck.

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Hiii!!! Long time no see! Hope all of you are doing fine. Please pray for the Lebanon people, they need our prayers. And please stay home and safe.

Hope you guys enjoyed it if you read the whole chapter. I did try my best to actually write something adult but maybe I failed because I'm not so experienced writing such a thing and I'm sorry about it. Still hoping you loved it so far, I still considered the kids who are under 16 years old. You might not say anything but I know very well XDD.

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Btw Seriously guys!!!!! Do you guys just enjoy reading this book when I even didn't get to the main plot? I mean HOLY COWWWW 5.1K+ and 250+ votes already?? Woowwww thank youuuuu so much. I Purple Youuuuuuuuu. Saranghae 🥺🤧💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

To Be Continued