(Sam's POV)

Everything still feels so real, that's the confusing part about this. The wet grass still soaks into my pants, my face still feels warm when the summer air softly brushes past. And yet I feel so disconnected, like I'm not really here. I'm just sitting behind my own eyes watching, not living, because well how can a dead person live?

"Stop thinking so much, it's effecting Blue," Tara grumbles, head tilted down reading one of the moms many Rolling Stone magazines. When I turn my attention to Blue (where it should have been), there's a pout on his chubby face as he stares off at his lap, Violet talks animatedly at him not even noticing the mood switch.

"I'm sorry little guy," I whisper, crawling in front of him to hopefully sooth him a bit. It's so easy to forget the guardians emotions can effect the one they watch over, especially at such a young age. He looks up at me, but quickly shifts to Violet where she's still on a rant about whatever. He starts giggling when she pulls an exaggerated grossed out face at one part, I smile at that and move back to where I was sitting on the floor next to a half asleep Corey. One thing I've learned about him is that he sleeps ten times more then your normal Angel/Demon would, it's quite amusing watching him start to dose off on those nights Violet doesn't sleep till 1am.

About 20 minutes later the dad (who I've learned name is Corbyn) comes in telling Violet to get ready for the park, and grabbing Blue heading for the stairs.

"The park?" I guess Corey has chosen now to start paying attention.

"Yeah, one of us is gonna have to head back and tell the boys change of location," Tara stands and looks in the mirror that was above her, fluffing her hair a bit so it looks straight out of the 80s. "I'll go seeing as Sam can stay with Blue, that alright with you Sammy?"

"Uhm yeah of course, but where do you have to go again?"

Her eyebrows scrunch as she process the question, but then a look of realization takes it's place. "Oh yeah, sorry I forgot to mention, Colby and Brennen usually come join us when their jobs are done. So I'm just gonna go tell them to come here after."

I nod at that, Brennen seemed decent enough to spend some more time with. And well Colby is... different? "You said once their jobs are done, what are those?" I ask before she can leave after shrugging on her leather jacket.

"Just the basic demon stuff, I'll have Corey explain, be right back," she does that finger salute thing and exits the room. I know she's heading to the garage where the family rarely goes, because oddly enough even though they can't see us, they can see the portal like change as we go back home.

I just look at Corey waiting for him to pick up where she left off. "I mean like she said just the basic." I raise an eyebrow expecting more information then that, I can't help but be curious as to what my life would have looked like if I was one of them. He chuckles and nods before continuing, "Brennen's one of our head torturers, for the most damned of ghosts they bring them to the point where every fiber in their body regrets their choices and they live the rest of their eternity miserable with themselves."

"And Colby?"

"Colby... Colby is complicated, he's had a couple different jobs down there," he shrugs as if that should make perfect sense to me. Complicated, the exact word Tara used when I first met her to describe Colby.

"What? I though we were all 'destined' to play an exact role, could they not figure his out?"

"His situation is different." I pause my questions, really trying to figure out what that could mean. Different... Maybe Tara was wrong or wasn't supposed to tell me that there's more then me out there, I honestly can't think of anything else.

"But he's not like me? Both, doesn't truly belong to one?" And for a split second I let myself think that maybe, just maybe he is. But Corey's ear drum bleedingly loud laughter let's me know Tara was right before.

"Please, no, that man is most definitely not the other. No uh, I guess he's been a bounty for awhile, seems to not hate it that much. So he's a bounty, finds the ghosts that need to be taken to us and brings them in, or the ones that get out, though that doesn't happen much." Bounty hunter...

The brunette glares down at the guy, that I can now see has silver hair, the hand he has around his neck tightens so tightly that blood starts to collect around his many rings. The silver head guy cries in pain and let's him pull them into a room across from us, he kicks on the door and it quickly opens, I can hear the deafening screams and loud metal clashing but right when the guy hits the floor the door is slammed shut on it's own.

I quickly blink away the memory of when I first met Colby, not wanting to connect him to aggressive touches, glances that felt nothing more then judgmental, and bright smiles that I couldn't get out of my head despite those things. I guess that sounds less scary then him being a torturer like Brennen, but then again don't these people deserve it after the things they did? That's something I'd like to talk to Colby about, what does one have to do to end up there. Seeing as he's the one to go after the people, I figure he'd know that best. And one I want to ask Selene is where do our ghosts go, the ones "in heaven".

Looking back to Corey he's just watching me with his head fallen against the wall. "Anymore questions?" I shake my head and grab onto the tv stand to pull myself up.

"Thanks for answering the ones I did have though, I'm gonna go check on Blue," I smile gingerly, head heavy with questions that will only dissolve once they're united with their answers.

∞

Tara got back right before the family gathered in the car, with news that Brennen is almost done for the day and they will be heading to us in less then an hour. That was forty minutes ago, the siblings are in full swing on the playground, Violet climbing way too high to be safe, Blue having the time of his life as him and Corbyn go down the big slide. Tara and I are laying with the mom on the picnic blanket, not having very much fun seeing as we can't touch anything without her thinking there's a ghost. I mean, in a way there is... Anyways, the only fun part of this is watching Corey run around like a five year old, he's obviously having the time of his life.

"Would it make us horrible guardians if we left and just walked around? I feel like we're statues just laying here." I groan in agreement, taking her hand and pulling her up.

"Corey!" I continue after his loud 'what?!' sounds, "We're going on a walk, shout if we're needed!" He doesn't answer so I just shrug at Tara and turn on my heels, heading to the forest that frames the field.

The beginning of the trees is beautiful, shady, flowers growing all over the place, the soft grass stays short and many butterflies and bees flutter close to it.

"This truly is what freedom is made of," Tara speaks softly as she shifts through the trees. "I remember when I first got to hell, believe it or not I was happy to be there. Even though I couldn't remember my lives I somehow remembered the feeling. And upon hearing that it had ended, I figured freedom. It definitely is in a way, it's just not how I pictured it." That smile she wears now is different from the one I usually see. It's unadulterated, just content happiness, almost childlike in a way that it couldn't possibly have any negative feeling behind it.

"And what does the freedom you live look like then?" I smile back at her. My careful steps wait for her answer, instead of looking down at the fallen tree I was balancing on I look at her. It takes her a few moments to think of how to begin describing it.

"What a meaningful question Sammy," she laughs. Before she can continue another voice starts behind us.

"It's electrifying if I had to use one word, but it's also intimidating, especially if you spend so much time with the living like you do. We're what they fear, and that on it's own is scary, being the very thing they pray away. But hey, we're some of the most powerful beings, we can go wherever we want in the world, we don't have any of the worries that people have and our rules are rather loose. But there are rules, and they have no part in freedom. So Tara tell me, is it truly or are we hopeful thinkers because there's nothing else to wait for after this?" I recognized his voice way too soon for how many times I've spoken to him.

"Don't mind him, he's in a bad mood," Brennen laughs jogging over to us. "Corey shrugged us off and waved in this direction so we figured we'd find you guys here."

"Why are you upset? You barely even had to do anything today," Tara throws some leaves at him, which don't even make it half way before hitting the floor. I smile watching Colby cough trying to stop himself from laughing.

"Well let's just say I had a chat with the devil." And smiles gone just like that.

"He's- that's an actual being? For us 'god' is just like a feeling the higher ups get. The devil is something you can speak to?" My jaw is slack and eyes wide trying to picture what such a 'person' may look like, or be like is the more worrisome part.

All three of them go completely straight face staring at me, but the facade drops and they all almost fall to the ground laughing.

"Oh you poor thing," Brennen is the first even able to make words. "No, it's just what we say when the council gets difficult and unbearably mean. They get in moods."

"...You should probably mention that before scaring everyone to thinking he's a real entity." I send a glare Colby's way as he's the only one left laughing.

"Sorry Angel, I'll stop," he grins, still shaking with laughter. "So, who wants to mess with the humans with me?" Mischievous is the only way I could describe his tone of voice. I shift on the leaves under my feet, only slightly scared to see what 'mess with the humans' means. Tara scoffs and Brennen is more then down, Colby looks to me next with a questioning look. I don't know if I hate or adore when his attention is just on me, it leaves this burn in my gut, like he's compelling me in some way.

"Sure?" Brennen and him cheer, Tara watches in surprise. Colby goes to grab my wrist-

Water, so much water. My vision is completely blurry, splashing water filtering it. Can't breathe, muffled crying, the ringing in my ears nearly bursts my ear drums. A firey touch all over my shoulders and face. Trapped, no escape.

I choke and gasp as I rip my hand away from his touch, pure fear is in his eyes when I look back up at him, trying desperately to catch my breath. He goes to hold me up as I drop to my knees, but I twist away from his touch never wanting to feel whatever the heck that was again.

"Sam?" Tara is the first thing I pick up on once my hearing fades back in. "Sam, what just happened? Was it a memory, did you have any signs of one coming on?" The headache last night, how could I have not known what was going to happen today, of course. It wasn't some weird thing Colby triggered, it was just a coincidence that was bound to happen sometime today.

I calm myself down, just watching the crinkled leaves sway, not wanting to face their worried faces yet.

"Yeah, yeah I guess that's what it was. I think I was drowning..." Colby's the first face I see when I look up, he was kneeling infront of me, with a worried yet hard gaze. I flinch when he reaches out but don't move away. And when he reaches to wipe at my cheek no pictures start, my lungs don't feel like they're being filled with ice water. It is hot, nearly to the point where it burns, but to be fare it's warm whenever I get skin to skin contact with Tara or Corey too, apparently it's just a demon thing, and I guess some are just more blazing then others.

"What are you doing?" I ask softly when he pulls away.

"You were crying..." My own hands fly up to my damp cheeks, remind me again why I was excited for these memories?

"Whatever, can we just go do whatever we were talking about before please," I take Tara's offered hand to stand.

"You don't want to talk about it mor-" I'm quick to cut her off with a sharp 'no'. And even if I did there's not more to say.

When I walk past Brennen he just gives me a sad nod. And it's not brought up after that.

∞

"Wanna see something funny?" Colby asks, leaning closer to my ear. Turning to him he's looking between the giant fountain and Brennen smiling.

"Course I do," I laugh quietly already knowing what he's about to do. At that he rushes forward, sending Brennen shooting into the fountain, getting Violet and the mom drenched seeing as they were sitting on the ledge. They scream and jump up, just staring at the 'empty' water trying to figure out what caused that. My stomach aches with laughter as I lean on Tara for support. Colby's more focused on my reaction with a proud smile then Brennen looking like he's ready to kill, sadly that makes him miss Brennen flying at him (not literally), sending them both to the concrete with a thud.

Colby groans and shoves him off. "Why are you mad at me? Sam told me to," he winks at me when Brennen looks at me in pure betrayal. I try not to laugh seeing as he looks like a drowned dog.

"Me?! I didn't do such a thing," I point my nose up and turn my head from them.

"Are you calling me a liar right now Angel?"

I stand my ground even as he stands with a challenging look. "Yes, I in fact am."

"Wrong answer."

I don't even get the chance to ask 'what?' before he's charging at me, I scream and run the opposite way. Taking off into the field. I don't even get half way across it before he catches up and we both fall face first into the grass.

"I'm liar? huh, weird, could have sworn I was telling the truth." He laughs as he straddles my waist and flips me over so I'm laying on my back. My breath is taken once I get my eyes on him. The way he's leaning over me the sun is directly behind him, causing this beautiful halo effect.

"What are you?" I ask breathlessly.

"What?" He looks at me like I'm delirious. When I don't respond he tilts his head and softly squints at me for a moment. "You're an odd one Sam," he smiles and shakes his head. After getting off of me, he lays at my side, seeing I'm not getting up too.

I don't know how long we lay there, staring at the sky and also sparing glances to each other. I honestly don't even know why I asked him that question, Corey already told me he's a bounty. Maybe it's simply that he feels different, and I don't know how to explain that better, to be fare I've only met what? Five demons? I'm clearly no expert. I let my head fall to the side, watching his side profile, and I wonder if it's just him. That carries this weird shock to the system, and maybe it's a trick of my eyes when I think I see real gold flakes in his, because that simply is not possible for his kind. Corey told me he's definitely not an angel, and if not a demon what else is there?

"You're staring."

"Sorry?"

"I said, you're staring."

"I know, I said sorry, like should I be sorry," and there it is again, that confidence he brings out of me.

"Oh," he chuckles, not once opening his eyes.

In the background I hear the dad tell the kids let's get ready to go.

"We should get up."

He sighs and opens one eye to look at me. "I suppose we should." I've learned I hate it, when he looks at me, because so little of the time can I read him as he does. And that's unbelievably frustrating when it seems like his eyes have so much to tell me.

∞

Brennen is still complaining about how his clothes are drenched by the time the family has gotten home and ate, settling into the living room for a movie night. Which is funny seeing as his clothes are bone dry and have been since we left the park.

"You're so dramatic," Tara grumbles. She's clearly fed up with us at this point, since the fountain we've been acting like absolute fools causing unneeded chaos.

"You wanna see dramatic?" His eyebrows raise in question.

"I really don't."

That clearly doesn't matter as he grabs one of the left over cups of water and chucks it to where Colby was minding his own business, just watching over the kids from where he was sitting at the table. Which is probably what we all should be doing. Corey said he had many jobs, I wonder if one was ever a guardian.

"Dude! What the actual fuck?"

"We're even now," Brennen smiles and turns on his heels to go into the living room. Colby glares so harshly at Corey for laughing that he sprints after Brennen out of the room. Tara just smiles and shakes her head leaving too as Colby strips off his shirt seeing as it's the only thing that really got wet. I can't even appreciate his chest before he's turning to the mirror behind him to fix his hair. I get a step closer to him but then take notice of his back.

Scars. Dark, dark, scars, slightly outward curved lines dragging to about the half way point of his spine, in a wicked way framing it. horrible burns surrounding the rest of his back. Stopping just at his hairline, which I now notice is messed up in the back, most definitely from whatever caused this. It's so bad that you almost want to throw up picturing what possibly could have happened, and how it'd feel to endure it.

"Colby..." he looks back at me, waiting for me to continue. But I just slowly walk up to him, delicately placing my hand on his shoulder, the burns aren't as bad here, which isn't saying much seeing as how the others are, 'not as bad' is still very bad. Before I can even process the feel of his skin he snaps around and grabs my wrist.

I wish now more then ever that I understood what his eyes were saying, but I can't, so I press forward. "Colby, what happened?"

He swallows and looks down, not letting go of his grip on my wrist. "Nothing to worry about, it was a really long time ago," the side of his lips lift into a small smile. Taking a deep breath through his nose, with out looking at me, he let's go of my wrist only to take my hand and place the softest of kiss to my knuckles before dropping it all together and walking away.

I catch another glimpse of the burns as I watch him walk out of the room. And when I look back at the mirror my own eyes are watery.

Who is this boy? I noticed the small burn under his right eye at the bar, and really didn't think of it after that. But this, this isn't something I can brush off. Demons can't be burned. Corey mentioned it the other day as he was playing with the flame of a candle so Violet thought she had powers and could move it. So what changed that for Colby, why do all these rules seem to not apply to him? I can't ask anyone else about it, it's not their story to tell. I must wait for Colby to, even if it feels like I'm dying to know every part of his history.

∞

Lots of Love- B🖤
(Word Count: 3559)