"'Cause I fuck with myself more than anybody else."

┌── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──┐
One-shot-writing
└── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──┘

Let's get into it!

☁first impressions (24.5/25): I love the cover photo... Yoongi literally can do no wrong. However, I think you could use a different font and get rid of the devil stuff for him, and maybe instead tint the whole cover red to signify what he really is. It will give the book a more mature vibe, I believe. Also, I think the font could be more professional. Next, the title is totally unique, as your book comes up first on the search results, and it makes me super happy that you got a monopoly on that name because it suits the book so well! Lastly, I love the description. It's professional and most of all makes me want to read the book even more! Great job overall.

☁grammar & sentence structure (13.5/15): The grammar is super good all around, save for some mistakes with commas. (Especially in quotations. Make sure to put a period in the quotations if there isn't a dialogue tag afterward) Only a very light copy edit is needed. It's really great to see books that pay attention to the little things, and you definitely did it with this one. For sentence structure, I would try to deviate from the classic subject + verb + whatever else, and instead try to vary your sentence lengths as well as the prepositional structure. This way, your readers can feel more engaged in your text and almost forget that they're reading at all. Read your passages out loud to see if they flow naturally, then fix them accordingly.

☁plot (26/30): Right away, this is something I've seen before, with the European supernatural AU in the modern setting, but you deviate from what I expected the plot to be in a lot of places, so great job! I could see that you worked on the world building a bit before writing it, (I especially love the "demon tamer" tattoo part) and it shows through your detail. However, I feel like a lot events feel a little disjointed, as if you wrote scenes that had to be in there without thinking about the flow of how each one went to the next. This relates to character motivation and the anatomy of a scene; what does the character want to achieve? Is that clarified in a previous scene before it? I also saw a lot of info dumps/telling, not showing in your prose. This can be fixed through putting a lot of that information in dialogue spread throughout time instead of all in one place. I really loved the few action scenes we got in the plot; while it was fun, it also gave the book a bit of flavor that sets it apart and covered information that we wouldn't have gotten otherwise. I notice that there isn't a lot of filler so far, which is REALLY good because it keeps readers interested. Think of your plot like a beast: you want it lean but muscular to make it perform to the best of its abilities. Not too much filler, but put some scenes in there that aren't exactly "necessary" and still important to really fill it out. Anyway, each chapter is definitely a page turner, so I'm excited to see what happens next!

☁characters (18.5/20): Fallen is a really interesting character that I liked right away. Already from the prologue, we see her as a sympathetic character that we can root for, as she's stuck in a difficult position and basically has the same thoughts as us in the situation. Yoongi is the best, of course (how can my bias not be). I like how demure he is in this book, at least in the beginning, as opposed to the bad boy that everyone casts him as, which I'm guilty of doing myself! It's a really nice change of pace for the book and keeps readers interested in the material. In contrast, Taehyung is really the stereotypical devil character that I think all books kind of need. He's the perfect person to play this role. Him and Jungkook make an ideal duo so far. I would just say that some of these characters seem a bit 2D, so it would be best to flesh them out with individual quirks later to differentiate them from any other BTS "character" in other fanfics. However, it's hard to say how they will be characterized through the book since there are only a few chapters so far, but I trust that you'll do a good job with them, as you're on the right track.

☁writing style (17/20): I like how you have 3rd person omniscient as the writing style in this story; it makes all the difference in your story telling and how the events are interpreted by the readers. For example, if it were just 1st person, I don't think it would be the same type of read at all. Not to say this is bad, just interesting. It also adds room for more character development, which is crucial for a book that only has a small number of chapters so far. However, I don't find anything about it that pops out to me, and for this, you can add more character quirks to whoever you're talking about in the descriptions, since it IS 3rd person omniscient. Think about the psyches of the characters and write almost from their perspective while still retaining that distance. I know that sounds confusing, but it'll definitely spice up your style for the better.

☁flow (8/10): In the beginning, I felt that it was a little too fast, and I didn't get very acquainted with Fallen before she delved into her mission. I would say fill in more details about her getting the mission, getting prepared, etc. Details really help with the pacing of the book and help readers get settled into a world that is completely new to them! I like the chapter lengths, as they are consistent and not too overwhelming, but one thing I'd like to say is to cut the paragraphs in two where they get a little too long. I found myself getting overwhelmed sometimes in the middle of them, and it's super easy to do! Wattpad readers are not like regular readers for books; it's harder to hold the attention span on a scroll rather than an actual book with pages. However, other than that, it's all good!

☁total score: 97.5/120 or 81.3%!

Groovy, baby!

☁optional advice nook: different font/style for cover, light copy edit, think about the flow of your prose and plot and where it's going to make your writing smoother, add more quirks to your writing to make it pop out, focus on developing characters and their motivations in tandem with the plot, even out info dumps.

☁song nook: Here are some songs I thought of while reading this! I thought of a lot of darker sounding songs to exemplify the devils, obviously. Hope you enjoy!

♔F**k with Myself by Banks♔
(the beat, the vibe... perfect.)

♔Fall In Love by Phantogram♔

♔Teardrop by Massive Attack♔

♔Beggin For Thread by Banks♔

☁summary: This truly took me way too long to do, and I hope it wasn't underwhelming, because I really do want to help you with your book. I enjoyed reading this all the way through, and I hope you write more so that I can see your journey as a writer!

Aaaand... that's it for the review! Comments, questions, concerns, please let me know. I'm not sure if Round 4 will come soon, but I'm hoping to put it out soon! I'm very sorry this round took so long... School work is really taking a toll on me. I'll try to be better for the next one!

SEE YOU THERE!